Chapter 4: Duality
Luna Lovegood tossed and turned before rolling onto her back. She stared at the canopy of the bed, contemplating the first day back to Hogwarts castle. The train ride mere hours ago had been eye opening and she had more questions than she felt a second year should have. First and foremost had been the dementor. How one of those beasts, and as an aspiring magizoologist, Luna had no better term for those things, had gotten into the train in the first place was beyond her. Worse yet, it spoke to her.
Earlier that day
Luna had been confused as everyone else had been when the train stopped. The cold and dark that accompanied had her feeling desolate. The greyed hands of the creature slowly grasped the open compartment door. Her classmates shrunk against the opposite end of the compartment and Luna stood closer than she'd like, facing the swirling, misted darkness of the hood.
"Master…" A cold, low voice called. It sounded hollow, artificial almost.
Luna stared at the creature and shrunk back as it came in.
"Your servants in the Dark will be waiting for the mark…" The voice said, echoing in her ears as the dementor pulled back and left the compartment.
"L-Luna, are you okay?" One of the boys in the room asked.
Luna turned, unaware of the tears flowing from her eyes.
"Did you hear it? What it said?" She asked, her voice an almost hysterical whisper.
The others paled.
"Luna, it just stood there." One boy said, looking at her and the door nervously. "Dementors can't talk."
Present time
Luna shivered in her bed. Even with the warming charms applied to each bed to keep a nice temperature, she felt cold and dirty. One of the darkest abominations to stalk the world had spoken to her. However, she didn't want to dwell on it as she had other concerns.
She had been overjoyed to see Tom Riddle back in her life. She was certain her friend had perished in the Chamber incident. However, there was a burning question in her mind.
Last year, hadn't Tom attacked her?
She remembered the corridor with the torches turning out. She remembered the fear of something being after her. And then, nothingness.
However, the dementor's unwanted ability to bring trauma to a forefront had broken some bewitchment on her memories, and she remembered Tom coldly treating her like some incompetent means to an end.
She had so many questions.
Had it been him? Had he actually hurt her? Or had that been the diary?
She was crying again as she rolled on her side. Tom was her friend.
He had to be.
OoooO
Daphne looked at herself in the mirror in her dormitory room with a small sigh. She hadn't changed much in the last couple of years, unlike her friends. Harry had grown a bit, not quite towering over her, but definitely taller than her. Blaise had grown just as much as the other boy. Tracey hadn't gotten much taller, but she was definitely filling out in a way that made Daphne feel self conscious.
Objectively speaking, she felt she was prettier than her friend, even if Tracey wasn't bad looking to begin with.
She sighed. Her mother said not to worry. That did help, but not much. She felt like she looked childish next to her friends, public facades or not.
Maybe she was just reading too much into it. Her "ice queen" thing was more intimidating, according to her friends. No objectivity there.
'Why do you care?' She found herself asking.
She wanted to sound uncaring about it, but it was accusatory. She knew exactly why she cared, but as long as it wasn't obvious to the world, it was fine.
She walked out to the common room, seeing some older students plan their days out. Malfoy was giving some basic orders to Crabbe and Goyle and Nott provided an occasional comment.
Did those two seem to be standing taller? Whatever Tom had told them really seemed to take some weight off of them.
As she looked around the room, she noticed the general atmosphere of the room was significantly lighter than she remembered it ever being. All sorts of people seemed happier. Tom managed that.
'And all in one day. Not bad.' She thought to herself. 'Now to see how long it'll go on for.'
The aforementioned fifth year boy walked into the common room, a few smirking students made small talk, most of them greeting him as "my Lord". Merlin, she hoped it was ironic.
A lot of the students doing this came from heavily Death Eater families, which only made her feel more paranoid. She saw Harry and Tracey walk out of the dormitory hall, Blaise close behind.
'Oh yeah. That's why you care.' There was that voice again. No, she recognized this as what it was; her conscience. It was guilt. Guilt at still not having told Harry about the soul bond. Guilt at having feelings for a boy with a girlfriend who was also her friend. Shame at herself for being too afraid of saying anything. Worry at how things will turn out. She was certain neither Harry nor Tracey would be happy with the information. Even less when they know how long she'd known for.
"Distance is the thief with which you conspire." A black haired girl said, who'd she had almost forgotten was there.
"What do you mean, Pansy?" Daphne asked.
"Well, you keep staring at Potter like some delicacy you crave but can't have. You steal glances at a distance."
Daphne looked embarrassed.
"I do not!" She said, face very red.
"Daph- er.. Greengrass, I could ask if anyone thinks you fancy Potter and I'm sure most people would agree. Why do you think Trac-damn- Davis glares at you so much? You constantly eye her chosen beau." Pansy said.
"I swear it's nothing like that!" Daphne said, feeling more embarrassed than she thought.
Pansy gave her a predatory smile that reminded her just a bit too much of Blaise.
"Would you make a witch's swear on your magic that you have no interest in Harry Potter whatsoever?" Pansy asked.
Daphne's eyes widened and she tried to stutter an excuse. Pansy chuckled, making the blonde girl glare in embarrassment.
"And that is exactly what I meant." Pansy said smugly.
"Shut up." Daphne said simply.
"Do something about it." Pansy said with a shrug.
"What?" Daphne asked in surprise.
"Are you worried?" Pansy asked.
"Tracey has a Slytherin's claim on him."
"So? The claim means something, but it's not like you can't challenge it. If you have a strong enough stake over Tracey, he's all yours." Pansy said, watching the common room interactions with Daphne.
"Why do you keep doing that?" Daphne asked.
"Doing what?" Pansy asked, confused.
"You keep almost calling us by our first names and switching back to surnames." Daphne said.
"I'm just not close enough to feel comfortable using your first names." Pansy said, biting her lip. "You guys have been nice to me, but I can't help but feel like we're not quite friends yet."
"I think we're friends." Daphne said simply.
"I know you're avoiding what I said about challenging her claim. But.. thanks, Daphne." Pansy said, smiling.
OoooO
"New schedules." The prefect said, handing Daphne her schedule as he walked down the table in the Great Hall. She looked it over her courses, and nodded, committing it to memory.
"I regret my classes." Pansy said with a huff.
"Why is that?" Harry asked.
"I originally had all my classes lined up with my now ex-fiance." Pansy said with a sour look.
"I'll keep you company then." Blaise said nonchalantly as he began serving himself breakfast.
"Blaise, what in the hell is wrong with your schedule?" Tracey asked.
"Nothing at all, why?" Blaise asked, looking down at his sheet.
"You have ten classes to our seven." Tracey said.
Harry and Daphne gave each other a look before Harry reached for Blaise's timesheet.
"Bleeding hell, Zabini. How are you managing this? Half these classes conflict with each other." Harry said.
"I'm not the only one." Blaise said with a shrug.
Before they could ask what he meant, an outburst from the Gryffindor table answered the unasked question.
"How are you gonna do three classes at once?" Ronald Weasley cried out, looking at Hermione Granger.
She pulled him down by the ear, silencing him very effectively.
"Tell me you're not doing this over a girl?" Tracey asked with a groan.
"Why, Miss Davis! I would never." Blaise said in mock offense. "Word is that Miss Granger is seeing one of the Gryffindor Weasley twins."
"Just one?" Pansy asked, not looking up from her porridge.
She noticed the glances and smirks being sent her way and put her spoon down.
"What? They're identical. How could she tell them apart? She's probably seeing both and not realizing it." Pansy said with a shrug.
Blaise snickered and even some other students chuckled. A bit further down the line, Nott made some comment about a fuzz-haired ginger sandwich.
"Hey, Potter." Draco Malfoy said, turning his schedule over. "Our first quidditch match this year is against the Gryffs. Do you have a replacement ready?"
"Malfoy, you already know you're the back-up." Harry said. "Why ask?"
"Because I don't intend to lose the cup over your issue with dementors." He said, lowering his voice enough to not be overheard by other tables.
Harry looked pensive for a moment before he leaned back.
"Oi, Flint." He called.
The Slytherin boy raised an eyebrow and walked over, being signalled by Potter and Malfoy.
"What's so important a couple of third years required me to get up?" He demanded.
"We have a possible situation with the quidditch squad." Harry said with a frown.
This immediately got Flint's full and undivided attention.
"Speak."
"Potter has an unfortunate fainting issue when dementors get too close. I think we may need to make sure we have some way to properly switching players if need be." Draco said.
Harry nodded.
"One player isn't worth losing the cup. We need to practice exit drills and maybe some schedule to keep both me and my replacement sharp." He said.
Draco nodded and Flint looked thoughtful.
"We can definitely work something out." He said, before glaring at both of them. "However this won't be an excuse to half-ass on any and all training and games, am I clear?"
Harry and Draco glanced each other with a smirk and nodded. With that, Flint walked back over to where he was.
"Just look at him!" Tracey said with a giggle as she watched Blaise walk to the Gryffindor table.
He patted Granger's shoulder and nodded his head to the hall. She nodded and grabbed her bag, quickly following Blaise out of the Great Hall.
"He's probably gonna try to snog her senseless." Tracey said a giggle.
"I dunno. Blaise might be a prick, but I don't think he would be one to force himself on anyone." Harry said.
"Especially not some mudblood." Theodore Nott said, spreading jam on his scones.
Some people nodded at that, others rolled their eyes.
"Well, some things really don't change." A voice said. They turned to see Tom sit nearby with an easy smile. He shared a couple of greetings and checked his time sheet, absently serving himself food.
"So, why are you sitting here rather than with the other fifth years?" Draco asked, genuinely curious.
"This was my spot. Dead center of the table. No matter what happens, this side of the table always keeps this spot exactly in the middle." Tom explained.
"I mean, fair, but still not sure why." Draco said.
"I've sat here since my first year. I know where and what foods are around me so I don't have to bother looking up. And besides." He said, before smirking and hissing "The Heir of Slytherin never has to serve himself."
Malfoy choked on a bit of kipper he was eating, spitting it up with watery eyes.
"Bloody frickin' Merlin's suspended balls." Malfoy choked out. "Can you not do that when I'm trying to eat?"
A couple of uneasy chuckles came from people who found the situation funny, but agreed with Malfoy that it was definitely disconcerting.
"Maybe someday he'll grow up." Harry hissed nonchalant, eating a piece of fruit.
Tom snickered and nodded.
"Maybe one day." He agreed.
Draco shivered and looked back and forth between them.
"I don't understand a single word and yet I can't help but feel attacked." He muttered, making both boys laugh.
Daphne looked fondly at her friend, enjoying a rare lighthearted moment. The necessity of appearing self assured as an heir to a prestigious house definitely had its pluses, but having to appear so closed off in front of the world was not one of them. A loud throat clearing caught her attention.
She turned and saw Tracey frowning at her.
"What?" She said, with her own frown.
"Daphne, please. I am asking you, hell, begging you. We're friends." Tracey said.
Daphne looked at her and stood up.
"Come with me." She said, walking out of the Great Hall.
The shorter brunette girl stiffy rose and followed out, Pansy quickly gathering her things and Tracey's before following the other two out. She walked out of the Hall just in time to see Tracey walk into a vacant classroom. She walked to the door and was about to open it when she heard the other girls' voices.
"-Ell is your problem?" Daphne asked.
"You know damned well what my issue is." Tracey said. Pansy could imagine the shorter girl crossing her arms.
"Harry is my friend, Tracey." Daphne retorted.
"And yet you keep ogling my boyfriend!" Tracey answered almost yelling.
"Harry and I were raised together. Hell, born together. He might as well be my twin brother." Daphne said exasperated.
Pansy could imagine Tracey rolling her eyes because she did the exact same thing.
"And yet he chose me out of both of us." Tracey replied.
That was news to Pansy.
"Yes, and I dated Susan Bones, remember?" Daphne responded.
That was also news.
"And how did that go?" Tracey said in a way the sneer could almost be felt in her words.
"That- that wasn't my fault!" Daphne said, sounding caught off guard.
"Why not?" Tracey demanded.
"Everyone started acting all weird after the Chamber last year. Susan decided she would stick with her house. She even left our study group. Hufflepuff loyalty my…" Daphne said in a grumpy tone.
"And yet, you don't seem very upset." Tracey pointed out.
"It was a short relationship that went nowhere. Sorry for not acting like the world ended." Daphne replied in a snide tone that would've made Snape proud.
"And I've been with Harry for almost a year." Tracey said. "And either you get that and you care about our friendship enough to respect that, or you don't and you're as cold as your 'Ice Queen' crap makes you seem."
Damn. THAT was cold. There was a popping sound and moment of silence that made Pansy worry one of them may have actually killed the other. Before she could react, a pop was heard and an upset looking elf appeared next to Pansy who snapped his fingers, launching her into the room.
"Sees, Missus Daphy? Dobby found a snoop!" The elf declared.
That's why it looked familiar. It was the old Malfoy elf.
"Aren't you supposed to be dead?" Pansy asked the elf.
The elf squeaked and looked ready to attack.
"Is snoop girl threatening Dobby?" The elf asked.
"Pansy, what are you doing?" Daphne asked with a frown.
She had the decency to look ashamed.
"Honestly, I was coming to give Tracey her book bag but I stopped after I heard you two talking." She said honestly.
"So you stopped to eavesdrop." Daphne said, glaring.
That Ice Queen look was intimidating.
"I didn't mean to and neither of you locked the door or put up privacy charms. I wouldn't be surprised if half the Great Hall caught part of your spiel." Pansy said.
'Good job on not stuttering.' She thought to herself.
Daphne's glare softened and Tracey gave her a weary smile.
"We uh.. didn't think. Haha…" She said weakly.
"Yes, I noticed." Pansy deadpanned. "Look, you two have some issues to work through around Wonder Boy, but remember in public, we should be one unified front."
The other girls nodded and sighed.
"Look, Daph, you're my friend, and I adore you. But, Harry chose me. Please, if that means anything to you, respect that. If it falls apart, it falls apart and I won't blame you for making a move then. Let me have a chance." Tracey said softly.
"Oh, Trace." Daphne said with a sad smile, hugging her friend.
It seemed they made up.
'But, Daphne never did say she agreed.' Pansy noted.
OoooO
Sirius woke up, sighing internally. The cold grey cell that greeted him was normal. Just another day in hell. And that was essentially what Azkaban was; Hell on Earth.
He watched the grey nothingness that misted outside of the excuse for a window in his cell, his dirty rag bed tossed aside.
"Hold him steady boys!" A voice called.
Sirius turned to the door, quickly glancing both ways to check for dementors.
Footsteps came closer and closer along with the rattle of chains between them.
Two dementors floated ahead of the parade of bodies. Hit Wizards and Aurors all on high alert. The sight of it made the hairs on his neck stand on end.
"Dwallings, don't give him any slack!" A voice ordered.
"I'm not, sir!" The man now identified as Dwallings responded, looking fearful.
The rattle of the chains came closer, and stopped with a gap between the people. Between them, there was a man, about twenty years old. His raven hair was messy and unkempt, and his round spectacles were cracked. He had a very familiar smirk on his face. Sirius was too shocked to gasp. The tears welled up in his eyes and his voice, gravelly from misuse called out in anguish.
"J-James? Pro- Prongs?" He coughed out.
The man's face snapped to him, eyes closed but the smirk remained. The eyes slowly opened, an eerie glowing green.
"Come now, Uncle Pads. You should know better than that." The man said.
If Sirius felt sick, this made him almost vomit.
"No. No. No no no no no no NO!" Sirius cried. "You can't. Not you. Not you Harry! Not my Harry!"
"A bleeding merciless killer. Just like his godfather." The man in the back said solemnly.
Sirius turned to the man, Albus Dumbledore.
"I never killed anyone! I never did!" Sirius screamed at the wizened man.
"You killed my parents." Harry said with a feral smile.
"No! That was Peter! Peter Pettigrew! I would've never done anything to hurt you, Pup!" Sirius cried, tears greying from his dirty face.
"You killed me too, Sirius!" A portly man said who was behind Harry.
He watched in horror as Peter Pettigrew turned to him.
"You killed us."
That voice. Not that voice.
He turned to see a red headed woman staring at him with such hatred.
"Lily… please." He begged, his voice just above a whisper.
"You killed us, Sirius Black. All of us. And look where that led our son." She screamed at him.
"You're a heartless monster." The woman in the opposite cell cooed. Bellatrix LeStrange taunted in that grating baby voice. "Just like your big cousin!"
More and more people began shouting at him, Harry and Bellatrix cackling in an insane harmony. Sirius cried and fell back into his cell. He huddled in the corner, metal bits and rocks on the floor biting into his skin. The voices grew louder and more sinister as the mad cackling became more and more insidious.
And as sudden as it began, there was silence. Absolute stillness and silence.
Sirius opened one bloodshot, watery eye and saw a dementor leaning into him, the thing that passed as its mouth closing in. He didn't care. He didn't have it in him to fight back. To scream for mercy. This was his end. This was…
With a gasp he woke up, his bed squeaking in protest of the sudden movement.
"Sirius?"
He turned to see Bellatrix opening and closing her mouth, trying to undry her mouth.
"Y-yes?" He asked, his voice hoarse.
"You screamed first. Go fetch breakfast." Bella said, stretching.
Sirius nodded and rose up. It was a dream. All just a bad dream.
OoooO
Tom walked down the corridor to his first class, running a hand along the wall. A couple of his fellow fifth years walked with him, talking animatedly. He missed this so much. The feel of the stone under his fingertips. The carpet in the halls beneath his shoes.
Weird things one misses not having a body.
"Tom Riddle!" He stopped and turned to see Luna Lovegood standing behind him, looking very nervous.
"Buzz off, Looney!" One boy sneered.
"Hodges. I may not be Lord Voldemort, but insult my friend again and I'll show you where it comes from." Tom said coldly.
The boy in question, Hodges Gale froze up and nodded fearfully.
Tom, glared at the boy for a second before he snickered and shook his head, the other boys understanding the bluff.
Tom walked past the group of boys to Luna, who flinched when he raised a hand to offer a hug. He paused and frowned.
"What's wrong?" He asked, feeling worried.
"Did you attack me?" She asked.
His eyes widened. The boys behind him suddenly looked away, looking uncomfortable.
"We uh.. we'll see you in class" They said, walking away in what he recognized as fear.
"Luna, what?" He asked, looking very concerned.
"Don't 'what' me, Tom Riddle!" Luna said with tears streaming from her eyes. "You chased me in the dark. You hurt me."
"I know."
Luna looked up in shock. Her face scrunched up in a pained expression.
"Why? You're my friend. I thought. I thought you were my friend!" She cried, smacking his hands away as he tried to approach. "No! You will answer me!"
"I didn't have a choice." He said softly. "Voldemort knew I would never willingly set the basilisk free. He enchanted the diary and my soul along with it."
Luna looked at him, a sign to continue.
"Luna, he turned me into a parasite. He forced me to drain your magic." He explained.
"How did- did you stop?" Luna hiccupped.
"Unlike Voldemort, I regret hurting you. The regret gave way to me, from under the charms. Slowly, I overpowered them with your help and Myrtle's. It almost took me too long. Had it not been for Daphne Greengrass…" He said, his voice fading.
"If not for her what, Tom?" She asked, knowing the answer.
Tom looked into her eyes, seeing the hurt in them.
"Then I would've killed you coming back to life. Whether I wanted to or not." He said, his voice wavering.
There was a tense silence, occasionally broken by Luna's sniffling.
"Please, leave me alone." Luna said, a deep pain evident in her voice. She walked away, and Tom felt a pang in his heart.
There was a certain aloofness and calm from her normal behavior that was missing.
And it was his fault.