Right... My chapters have completely gone into chaos and I know I said chapter 5 was finished but I'm changing it a bit and moving some stuff between later chapters and what not so there will only be one chapter up this time. Chapter 5 is well on it's way to being finished though so it shouldn't take me more than a week the most to get it up here as well.

Month 4 – Perverted display of affection

Naruto slowly eased himself out of bed wincing as he did. He'd woken up a few hours ago to a very sharp poke right between ribs number 3 and 4, something that Kakashi seemed to be making a regular habit of doing these days. Being half asleep he'd paid little attention to the conversation just heard the words craving in there like always and something about wanting naruto (1), well that was easy they had lots of those in the fridge since Naruto liked them in his ramen.

Naruto who had completely had it with always having to wake up in the middle of the night to get Kakashi whatever he was craving at the moment, he still remembered having to run all the way to Suna to get some special dango they had there only to get back to find that Kakashi didn't want it anymore, had sleepily told Kakashi that if he wanted it so much then he should just get it himself. At this point he didn't care if Kakashi killed him for that or not, at least he would get some rest then. Naruto was how ever not expecting Kakashi to jump on him nor was he expecting to have the best, most kinky and steamy sex he had had in his life for the next 3 hours straight.

Naruto was making his way to the mission room as fast as he could, which wasn't very fast since he was also trying his best to hide the limping and trying to ignore the sharp pain that shot through his back with each step. Kakashi had managed to ravage him again 3 times before he got out, when he was taking a shower, in the kitchen when he was making his ramen and then up against the front door right before he escaped. Now Naruto enjoyed sex as much as the next guy but when your boyfriend was the second biggest pervert in the village and got most of his ideas from the biggest pervert in the village even great stuff like sex could sometimes get a bit too much, not to mention a little out of hand. Naruto was sure he could never look at his rubber duck with the same eyes as before, although on the plus side he'd gotten a whole new love for ramen.

Halfway to the office Naruto didn't know if he should be extremely annoyed or insanely scared. He knew Kakashi was following him, said pervert had indeed tried to drag him into various alleys along the way. So Naruto had taken to walking in the middle of the street trying to follow large crowds as much as possible in the hope that it would keep his lover away.

'Shit what the hell has brought this thing on, we barely even make out anymore with all the crazy mood swings and cravings, who could kiss someone after they've just eaten something that looks and smells like it came from the dump.'

'I think he's in heat.'

'Humans don't go into heat.'

'You sure? Looks like it to me and believe me I know what I'm talking about.'

'Ok spare me the details, I have noooo desire to know about your sex life.'

'Che and you think I have any desire to know about yours! I'm straight for Kami's sake!! You think they would at least have had the decency to put me in a straight container but nooo they had to make the torture even worse!'

'Jeez! For a huge and "scary" demon you sure do whine a lot.'

'WHAT! You come here and say that to my face. Grrr just unleash this seal and we'll see who'll be the one whining then!'

'Still whining.'Naruto sang in his head.

'Gah, whatever kit. But your lover is showing all the signs of being in heat and if he is you do not want to keep him unsatisfied for long.'

'Why? What will happen?'

'Well normally the creature in heat would drag it's mate somewhere private so they could fulfill their needs but knowing what kind of perv you chose as a mate he probably wouldn't even bother with the private part.'

Suddenly the street didn't seem crowded or safe enough to Naruto and he limped even faster to the mission office.

"Naruto, what happened to you?" Iruka asked a little worried when he saw Naruto's painful walk.

"Oh it's nothing Iruka-Sensei." Naruto laughed nervously. "I got a little injured on my last mission." 'Taking care of a pregnant Jounin should seriously be classified as an S rank mission.. I wonder if I can get Tsunade to put that on my record.'

"You got injured that badly handing out cookies to the old people?"

'CRAP! Damn those stupid D rank missions to hell!'

"Hehe yeah… you see there was this old obaasan.. and you see.. well"

At this point Naruto had unwillingly caught the attention of the whole room and to make matters worse Kakashi chose that moment to walk into the mission room.. scratch that.. To make matters so bad that Naruto wanted to scream like a little girl and hide behind Iruka, Kakashi came bursting into the mission room in nothing but his pants and mask, launched at Naruto and started doing his absolute best to rid his lover of any clothing that was in the way of what he wanted.. and Kakashi's best was very good indeed. Naruto had just enough time and sense to hang onto his pants for dear life, with the help of Kyuubi, before he hollered at his lover.

"Kakashi STOP RIGHT THERE! I swear if you don't behave yourself until we get home I will personally go there, BURN all your Itcha Itcha books.. Yes even the spare once.. and then I will take a voluntary month long mission to SNOW country so you won't get ANY for a whole month and even if you do go against Tsunades STRICT orders to stay in Konoha relaxing and follow me there you will be completely MISERABLE in the cold and you STILL WON'T GET ANY! Now let go of my pants right NOW YOU PERVERT!!"

"Until we get home?"

"Yes at least until we get.. HEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING.."

The room was suddenly filled with floating leaves and chakra smoke as Kakashi and his vict.. uhm lover teleported out of there.

Naruto was not happy. If he didn't know already that it definitely wouldn't work and would only make Tsunade even more unreasonable he would have jumped up on her desk himself and had a fit like a little kid. Well that and the fact that he could barely move let alone jump up on her desk. It didn't help that Tsunade seemed to be suppressing the urge to burst out laughing at him, he got that a lot after yesterday, and Naruto thought that sake bottle sitting on her desk looked an awful lot like the sake bottle a certain silver haired shinobi had been seen with that morning.

"But Baa-chan please you have to let me go! Seriously snow country could be making a huge plot to invade Konoha any minute now, I'll even go spy on them for free!"

"I said no Baka!"

"But whyyy." Naruto pouted.

"First of all, you and the word incognito don't even go well together in a sentence let alone reality. Second of all, I've already told you that from this month forward you will only get missions inside Konoha. And third of all." Here Tsunade snickered a little. "you don't look like you can walk home let alone all the way to snow country!"

"Fine! But if I drop dead from exhaustion my death will be on your hands! Now if you don't have any more ways in torturing me I have to get home before Kakashi wakes up and starts looking for me." Naruto sighed and headed for the door.

"Naruto." Tsunade sang out with an obvious smirk on her face. "How's Kakashi doing?"

"He's being a total pain in the ass! Naruto snapped before slamming the door behind him."

(1) Naruto is also a steamed fish-paste cake, the little white and pink swirly thing in the ramen bowls if you've seen that.