Hello, everyone! Thanks for the reads, I hope you're enjoying this series, but I will note that I really like feedback and I would love it if you gave me ideas. ~ELA
Dear Diary,
I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know how to speak or even if someone will ever care.
There was a point in time that I was so sure about where I was going and the way people would perceive me, but now... I'm just so lost. I don't know why this had happened. But suddenly, my whole life went from bad to terrible. I suppose that it all started with the news and a good cup of coffee. But I saw him, and at first, I was oblivious of who he was.
I started off running as I took my last glance at the man that I was oddly afraid of. It was then when I decided that I needed a cab. There was a wave of relief that washed over me when I walked into the apartment I had left earlier that morning. It was exactly the way I had left it. The floors still had a layer of dust over the old pieces of wood, the kitchen was still filthy and the same went for the bathroom. It was probably my bedroom that was the cleanest and even that had a thick layer of dust and the cobwebs that gave an eerie feel to the room. Taking off my cardigan, I found the broom and started to sweep the floors. When I realized how dirty the floors were I decided to first turn on the space heater in the apartment and then find a bucket, hot water, and a rag. I started to wash the floors, smiling to myself as the floors began to shine a beautiful color. I noticed a few different things, one that there was french doors leading out to the roof access from my kitchen and two that there were small paintings in some of the corners of each room. All of them were laced among the floor boards and each of them were beautiful and had a lot of detail. I sat there slightly awestruck, but still smiling at the designs.
My mind flickered back to my encounter with the man called The Joker. Maybe it was his smile that was so strange about him, or maybe it was that oddly familiar bone structure of his. One thing was absolutely certain though, some how I knew him.
Awestruck, that was the word that was missing as the Joker thought about the confusing feelings welling up in the pit of his stomach. The man that was sitting there, so perplexed in thought had, instead of his normal trademark grin, a odd pucker to his lips. His brows were furrowed in a narrow line, his teeth were clenched irritably over the scar tissue on the inside of his mouth. She has changed. Thought the Joker. He bit down deeper into his scar, making it bleed just a little. Leila was still polite and cold to strangers, but there was an odd edge to the way she talked now. More open to discussion. That was what it was, she had almost tried to make conversation with him, and even after she knew who he was she was still partially polite. The Joker thought back to how she had stared at him. There was curiosity on her face, but she gave up quickly knowingly that he would not let her know who he really was. He licked his lips gingerly as he let his acid green hair fall about his face. Why is this getting to me? He thought, the pucker coming back to his jagged lips. Didn't I want her to be afraid? At one point, he had wanted her to be afraid, but know he wasn't so sure. She seemed so delicate and yet so strong at the same time. There was a part of him that wanted to smash that facade. To break all that is still good in her, but the other part, the human part, said differently. The Joker knew that this would be different, that somehow he would have her. Even if she didn't want him back, she would still be his. Just like she was when they were in High School.
The Joker had nearly lost it when she had looked up from her book to stare at him. He had almost dragged her out of there in an instant. But there was something that held him back, something that he could not quite put his finger on. Just the way her cheeks had flushed so faintly and the way her lips had parted in puzzlement, it made him loose what sanity he had left. He recalled the way her eyes had flickered down to the book and how her long dark eye lashes had brushed her high cheek bones. Her voice had been softer than he had remembered it, more kind and sad. It had awoke feelings that he hadn't had in six years. After all, Jack Napier had gone "missing" his junior year. The only person who had sought him out after that one terrible day ways Leila and that was the day he had told her to stay away from him. He recalled the look on her face as she turned to leave the day he thought he had said good bye to her for good. But what he remembered the most was the helpless sob and the tears she tried to fight back as she smiled to him behind his door. That was what had broke his heart, he had never wanted to say good bye to the girl he had grown attached to over toughs wonderful two years, and yet he had to. How could she find him anything but repulsive?
But the world had changed him, just as it had changed her. She had become kinder, almost softer as the world adapted around her, while he had become harder, colder, more sinister. For the first time in two hours, The Joker sneered. He was still adorned in oddly normal clothing. But even Leila had noticed something odd about him, besides the fact that he would not show his face to her. Only his scars. He didn't want her to see what was left of the man she once knew, and that was all that there was to it.
The Joker pushed himself up from the old couch that, moments ago, he was sprawled upon. He paced himself to were his bathroom was and swiftly slammed the door. The house shook as The Joker looked at his bare face in the mirror across from him. Licking his lips gingerly, he steadied himself by placing his hands on the counter. The jagged tissue ran up and down from the curve of his lips to the high cheek bones framed by straggly acid green hair. His eyes dug deep in to the man staring back at him. The man looked like Jack, but as the man's grin widened and he started to laugh, The Joker knew that Jack was dead.
Alright! So, I'm sorry this is such a short chapter, but it will get better the next one. It's just a matter of how I'm going to word it... anyways. I hope you enjoyed. :)