So, Kidnapper had lost the most powerful warlock in the world, Boss was sending someone to kill her (if she didn't find Merlin), and the fangirl was no help at all.
"Just tell me where he went!" she demanded for the millionth time at the fangirl. She just kept typing. (Really, I'm typing this as we go along so I really don't have time to tell her where Merlin went.)
Finally, the fangirl looked up. "Do you really think that I'll tell you? Merlin's my favorite show and my favorite character. Do you think I want him dead?"
Kidnapper pouted and stomped over to the stairway, leading upstairs. She needed time to think.
Now, if she were the world's most powerful warlock stuck in a different time, where would she go?
The answer hit her so suddenly, it made her brain hurt. (Kidnapper wasn't much of a thinker, so, really, any thought hurt her.) She knew exactly where he was!
Merlin, for his part, was doing quite well for a warlock stuck in a 21st century town. He stopped freaking out whenever cars went by, and started getting used to being asked if he was some "Colin Morgan" guy. He was actually enjoying it a bit.
That was, until he saw Kidnapper coming down the street. Luckily, she didn't see him.
Quickly ducking behind a weird thing that he didn't know the name of (it was a garbage can), he held his breath until he was sure she had passed.
Peeking out to see if the cost was clear, he was startled when his eyes were met by a pair of big and round ones. His first though was, Holy Sh*t, that scared me! His next was Oh Sh*t, I am so screwed!
"Found you, cutie!" Kidnapper squealed. Before he could react, say anything, or even take a breath, her fingers found a soft point on his neck and the world went black.
"You found him?" the fangirl asked as Kidnapper hauled an unconscious Merlin over her shoulder onto the chair. She busied herself with tying him up (with elven rope this time, borrowed from the Lord of the Rings fandom) before answering.
"Yep!" the assassin answered cheerfully.
"How'd you find him?" asked the fangirl, still typing away.
"It was easy. I knew he had no set place to go, so I just wandered the streets until I spotted him. I pretended not to see him at first, then got him when he was off guard."
The fangirl stopped her typing for a moment. "You thought of that?"
Kidnapper blushed. "Well, first I went to a Chinese restaurant – I really thought he'd be there! – and I got a fortune cookie while looking for him. I didn't find him there, but the fortune cookie's fortune told me where I could find him."
The fangirl looked her up and down before returning to her typing. "Elaborate cookie," she said, shaking her head.
YOU'RE DOING WELL MERLIN FANDOM. BETTER THAN I EXPECTED, AT LEAST. THOUGH, I'M STILL NOT CONVINCED.
YOUR ARGUMENTS HAVE BEEN GOOD, BUT THE REAL QUESTION IS: IS MERLIN EVEN A RESPECTED FANDOM? MOST PEOPLE OVER LOOK IN IN FAVOR OF SUPERNATURAL, DOCTOR WHO, OR SHERLOCK (A.K.A. SUPERWHOLOCK). ONCE A FANDOM'S NOT RESPECTED ANYMORE, IT'S DEAD. I'M SORRY MERLIN FANDOM, BUT YOU'VE GOT TO FACE THE FACTS.
AND AS FOR HOW KIDNAPPER WILL KILL MERLIN, HIM BEING IMMORTAL AND ALL, ALL I HAVE TO SAY IS TWO WORDS: CELESTIAL BRONZ. (BORROWED FROM THE PERCY JACKSON FANDOM, OF COURSE.)
TWO WEEKS, MERLIN FANDOM. CONVINCE ME.
The fangirl being held captive to record what's happening would like to thank all those who've reviewed. :D (C'mon, guys let's save Merlin!)