Chapter 4

It's been a week and already Bella looks for him like he's all that matters. The people she sits with notice to but forge ignorance. She doesn't talk to me as much but it doesn't bother me. I'm just the shadow that is meant to protect her. Well that's the way I see it, she'd kill me if she found out I still think that. When I told her she started crying and yelled at me. It was priceless.

"Bella? Are you listening?" Mike asked as she stared past him.

"I-I'm sorry what?" she asked moving her gaze to him. So she spotted Edward? Otherwise her eyes would have went to Mike as soon as she realized he wasn't here.

"I was wondering if you would go out with me." He stated with agitation in his voice. I let a growl erupt from my throat loud enough for him to hear. His eyes went wide with fear, sadly he went back to looking at her.

"Mike I'm sorry. I only see you as a friend." she said sweetly. I let a snort escape and rolled my eyes. How many times has he gotten rejected now? Fifty? Twenty? Whatever. He needed to get a clue.

The bell rang singling the start of school.

"Come on Bells." I said grabbing her arm and gliding her to our first period class.

As we walked in I saw the bright pink road that belonged to Alice, the light blue that went with Jasper (thank you Alice for giving me his name), and the green that went with James. I nodded my head to them and walked to were Bella was.

"Bella, what's up? I can't stand it when my one and only lover ignores me when I know she's upset." I said with a grin. I heard James and Alice let out a scoff and chuckled to myself.

"I just really want to talk to him. That's all. But I need my space too." she said with a double meaning. 'I really wish he was here and you weren't' that was the hidden meaning and it stung to know what she wanted. I felt a surge of jealousy course through me and scooted my seat away from her.

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It was lunch and I haven't talked to Bella since she told me that she needed space. I still helped her when she fell but that's about it. I sat with her and became her silent shadow yet again.

She went to the salad bar and made edible art. Uhg I hate that she does that. I saw that she was talking to Edward and that she was going to sit with him.

I was hurt and pissed. My best friend left me. But I also knew this would happen ever since we were young. I swallowed my emotions and gave her her stuff then stalked outside and into the woods.

After getting inside the barrier of trees I stopped and punched the tree.

"Issues?" I heard an amused voice say behind me.

"Yes. I have a lot of them right now. So tell me what you desire James so you can leave."

He ran up to me and held my waist. He kissed me gently on my lips then hungrily. He grasped my waist and pulled me closer to him. He broke his kiss and started to lightly nibble on my earlobe.

"James, didn't you just learn that I was meant to be with you? So why are you acting so rashly?" I asked as he pulled off my jacket.

"The future changes. And I just realized how much you are on my mind. Always there." He whispered in my ear. I'm not going to lie, feeling his breath on my bare skin not only sent chills down my spin but also it sent me into a slight stage of ecstasy.

He started to lift my black Paramore shirt with the "Decode" lyrics and a girl with fangs on it. His hands stopped just below my black lacy bra. He started to kiss me again and I lifted his shirt off of him. He broke the kiss just to take off his shirt and my shirt. Suddenly he pulled me to the floor and I was on top of him straddling his hips with my legs. He pulled my head down for another kiss. I could feel his cold hands at where my bra latch was then I could feel my bra sliding down my arms.

"Ayanna! James! Stop it." I heard a loud soprano voice say in the back ground.

"Alice go away." James muttered as he was trying, but not succeeding, with getting my belt off.

"James maybe we should stop. Alice can get pretty scary when she's pissed off." I said getting off of him.

"I'm going to kill that damned little pixie." He muttered under his breath.

"Hey I heard that!" She said as she picked up my bra.

"Thanks." I said latching the hooks and putting my Paramore shirt on.

"Welcome and hurry or you'll be late to bio." she said with a sly smile. I only laughed and shook my head.

"Come on, lets go." James said intertwining our fingers together. I nodded and we started to walk forward.

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I can't believe I almost lost my virginity to James. No less in the woods! I thought as we walked through the doors. I saw Edwards head go up and it held a look of disgust. I wonder why. Did they tell you about me? I asked him. He nodded yes. Is James making you disgusted with perverted thoughts? I questioned with hope. He nodded yes again. good. You have my Bella so you deserve what ever James is thinking. I thought with a smile. He looked horrified but smiled when I told James to stop thinking.

"Ok class we are going over the human reproductive system…" the teacher droned on and on.

I probably would have paid attention but I had James next to me rubbing my thighs sending me into another state of ecstasy. Damn him. I think he was going to tutor me in that subject himself.

"James stop." I said in a very low whisper.

"Why? You like it don't you?" He asked with a seductive smile on his lips. Damn him he's right. It does feel good, but it feels too good so this will surely cause trouble.

"James if you don't stop now you wont get any till I'm over a hundred years old." I whispered with an evil grin. His hand stopped rubbing my thigh but that was it. It laid where it had stopped which was fairly high up.

Soon the bell rang and Bella walked with Edward to gym. James linked our hands together and kissed mine softly.

"You still have me babe." he said while walking with me to our last class. Did I mentioned that I shared the same schedule as James? No? Well I do.

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Gym was uneventful. We watched a movie on the safety of dodge ball, lame. Through the whole movie I was sleeping on James' chest with his arm draped around me. We only parted so that we could get our stuff from the locker rooms.

"I'm going shopping with Jessica and Angela. So I'll just drop you off with the car. Kay." She stated as I was half way out the door of the locker room.

"Okay?" I questioned openly confused. I could hear Jessica's snickers and I growled at her.

"Ello luv." James said as I exited the girls room.

"Okay, who told you I had a fetish for accents? Was it Alice?" I said as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders and I wrapped mine around his waist.

"No one. I just felt like saying that. But now that I know…" He trailed off with purring in my ear.

"James you're going to consume me with lust till I let you have me aren't you?" I asked trying to hold back a smile. His response was a smirk then licking my cheek. GOD! This boy just knows what makes me 'happy'. I'm weird and have a thing for animal characteristics and accents. Yup James was my perfect guy.

We reached Bella's car before anyone even stepped foot out of school.

"So what are you doing after school?" He asked obviously trying to make this something other than physical attraction… how sweet.

"I was gonna chill with Bella-vela but she bailed to go shopping." I said jumping up on her car's hood.

"Didn't she invite you?" He asked stepping closer to me.

"No. She didn't invite me either when they went to La Push. I'm no longer the only one in her eyes. She has those phony ass friends and Edward."

"So you're hurt now." He stated with a look of pain.

I laid my head on his chest and said, "No. If anything I'm jealous. I've been there with her for so many years but now she doesn't need me. I'm not important anymore."

"You're important to me." He cupped my face and kissed my stray tears.

"At least I have you. You'll be the only one who is gonna stay with me till I die right?" I couldn't believe what I was saying. I was questioning the paths I saw, the ones set in stone.

"Yes. I'll always be with you." He whispered while petting my hair.

"I love you."

"I love you too babe."

Suddenly someone cleared there throat and I saw Bella-vela standing with a look of pure fury. I kissed James softly and we said our byes.

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The car ride was silent. And I was picturing James going home, running to our house, going through the window, and sitting on my bed waiting for me. Sad thing is that it was probably what he was doing.

"Why didn't you tell me you were dating someone, let alone a Cullen?" She sounded pissed.

"Haven't talked much." Was my monotone reply.

"Yea you shut me out!" She yelled.

"I've shut you out?" she nodded as I stared at her with disbelief. "When have I shut you out?!? Bella all my life since I met you the only thing on my mind was keeping you safe, seeing you happy, help you fulfill your destiny, and let you be happy. Everything I do has been for you. I do one thing for myself and you tell me to go away and I get yelled at?!? What the hell Bells? I love you more than I love James but your attitude right now makes me want to puke! You act like those phony ass people you hang with." I said, no yelled at her.

"Why are you calling them phony? I've finally found people to fit in with and you do nothing but make us all feel uncomfortable." She said pulling up into our drive way.

"I call 'em as I see 'em. The only descent one would be Angela because she is real. But every one are only friends with you because you're the new kid. The topic of interest. The new toy that everyone wants."

"I am not. They are friends with me cause they like me."

"Fine Bella. Believe what you want. I hope you are happy with finally fitting in… even if it's with the wrong people."

"What is that supposed to mean? I swear Ayanna when you get cryptic I feel like smacking you."

"Why do you think you don't fit with humans? Hmm? Have you ever thought you weren't supposed to? But you wouldn't care now would you. Go play miss popular. Have fun with those who were deadlier masks than monsters. Be with those who would hurt you from the shadows. Forget me. Join that life if you wish. I wont be sad if I never see your face ever again." I said and ran to my room.

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I slammed my door shut, locked it, and turned to see that I was right about James. I started to cry and he ran over to where I was. When he got there he put his arms around my shaking form. I collapsed into him and just cried as he held me.

When was the last time I did this?

Never.