DISCLAIMER: Many of the characters and situations described in the following fic are owned entirely by Takahashi Rumiko, a woman I have the greatest respect and admiration for. (In fact if she were willing, I would have her love child. A neat trick since I am a male kinda guy and not built to bear children.) Her creativity has even inspired the creation of a whole new branch of the Trek Universe. Therefore, any mentions of historical moment from Trek, Trek-Tech and characters and ships, which I shall endeavor to keep at a minimum, is entirely intentional. Within this story are characters who are from the Trek Universe, but not of Trek. These are my creations. All other characters that are integral to this story are her property, apart from the characters from AMG. This is a work intended to share a concept, and perhaps my story telling abilities. There is no money to be earned by me or by anyone else from this work. I might also add, Paladin, Team Paladin, the Starship Percheron and her crew, and Miss Kitty as she is here, ARE my property, and not to be used with out express consent from myself. I have worked hard to develop these characters and hope to use them in published works eventually. I choose to share them and their attitudes with you here. The character from OH! My Goddess belong to who ever owns them… sorry but my copies of this series (as well as Ranma ½) mysteriously disappeared during a move

I would also like to add the following. NO the character of Jerrod Randolph Macon, A.K.A. Paladin is in no way related to T.N.G.'s Silver Paladin. That character was little more than a pirate, my character is intended to embody the true spirit of the word paladin.

Also, for the Trek nitpickers out there. I'm sorry to rain on your parade, but. There is no such thing as a society that doesn't use some form of currency. Roddenberry's vision of the future is a wonderful vision, but impractical as far as money is concerned. It is a socialist utopia, and it cannot work. Any historian or economist can tell you that. Even the most primitive cultures on the planet barter with each other for goods and services, and that is the earliest form of currency. Let's face it, even the People's Republics around the world, (Read as oppressive communist governments, where if you speak out against anything, you wind up run over by a tank.) Even they have currencies that the civilian public uses for internal trade. It has been postulated that the Federation has solved the issues of limited resources thereby removing the need for any form of currency. I disagree with this. Not that the resource problem has been addressed, but that currency will be done away with.

In the Federation future, most of the actual trade where currency is used to make a purchase will be of the 'intellectual properties exchange' forum. The reason why currency will always exist is because of the inherent need of humans for an incentive to improve. It wouldn't be worth your time to be a clothing designer or civilian engineer if you weren't given concrete evidence of your value. Payment of some form of currency will be much easier to keep track of fifteen hundred credits than twenty goats and fifteen sheep and three chickens from the buyer in China who really loved the new spaghetti strap, plunging to the ankles neckline evening gown.

Capitalism may not be perfect, but it's better than anything else around is right now.

Most likely the currency used in the world of Trek is closely related to various forms used in much of Sci-Fi, a credit system, there may be no hard currency, but there is a form of monetary exchange.

Internally to this story, there are some glaring examples, (to some) of extreme OOC, as well as outright character revision. As this is intended to be an original telling with some new characters with a minor twist here and there to aid in making the whole thing insensible… inchoate? …to the world of Rumiko's vision. There has been some comment that her characters aren't the way I have them here. And why would Ranma have a crush on Nabiki?

Okay, think about this. You live in a house with three very pretty girls. One of them you can't bring yourself to look at in any way other than as a big sister/mother figure. Then there are the other two, the youngest that you happen to be engaged to is violent, quick tempered, never lets you answer any question be fore she belts you and you are forcing yourself to love her.

And there is the third one, she isn't very nice to you, but you think you know why. She was also the only one that seemed excited when you arrived, and she doesn't hit you, ever.

I'd have a minor crush on her myself if I were Ranma.

Let's face it, Nabs, if she were a real person, would be a major babe.

The timeline for this story is just about there. Meaning there aren't going to be any of the big events that occurred in the manga and anime. The story makes an assumption that events alter somewhat with each restart by the Norn. So Herb and Saffron may exist but won't be part of the story.

And finally, for convenience sake. ( ) author's commentary.

Sound effect

Chinese

Japanese usually spoken planetside

English generally spoken aboard ship

And now for sumpin' gnu.

On with the tale

PALADIN ½ - SHE'S THE ONE

Chapter 3- Money isn't that important……

During the trip through the Einstein Heisenberg Gate, Jerrod and Kitty had undergone a change. In his case, apparently, he had become more of what he already was. A superman, no that didn't mean he could fly or stop bullets with his chest, but he could leap to the roof of moderately tall buildings. He could also bend steel in his bare hands. Provided it wasn't any thicker than about a standard inch.

He could tear plates of half-inch thick in half. But that was just showing off.

Kitty, on the other hand, had been the recipient of a one way exchange of genetic material. Jerrods DNA, the two genetic forms combined, with his taking over hers by a large degree and rewriting her code. Kitty was accidentally the result of a real-time mutation, still appearing very feline, but humanoid in form. Her dentition was an odd mix of omnivore and carnivore. (Still quite cute and adorable as cats are wont to be. Yes you may make the assumption that I have a thing for cats. I am owned by a good sized number of them and Kitty is patterned after the one that shared my life for the longest. Also think of Ryo-Ohki in her little girl form only a little less fur and gray and white.)

There was another unfortunate side affect to their transformations, the changes were painful and caused them to go into a trauma induced coma for several days.

Shortly after waking from their coma's, Jerrod had Bill Conagher, his chief engineer, and the other engineers begin to retrofit the ship with a cloaking system. That had taken the two months they had been in orbit around 'New Home', the colony world of the former Federation citizens. The new cloak projectors were based on a design that had been developed after the prototype that had been liberated by an earlier Star Fleet captain. These projectors had been redesigned with efficiency in mind. The other problem with the production of neutrino artifact had been addressed as well.

The new projectors would produce two to the eighth power per Cochran less neutrino artifact than the parent devices and subsequent designs by the nations that developed them. If those nations back home had known that Paladin had improved their designs, and was going to use them, they would have had a cow or the native equivalent on their respective worlds.

Then came the request from the Norn through their representative, Bell.

In transit from Coriolis Major, the system New Home was located in, other preparations were being made. Support staff, the ensigns and yeoman's that usually brought the senior officers reports to be signed were drilled on what information a good secretary would be required to ask in the way of obtaining contact information. And to learn how to push for a thing that Paladin called a 'deposit'.

In another part of the galaxy, in a small backwater system, on the surface of a speck of a water planet, two figures were walking the streets of a small suburb of Tokyo, Japan. Well, maybe not walking. More like staggering into each other and nearly everything else between them and home. If one were to assume they were drunk, one would be right.

Their names are Soun Tendo and Genma Saotome, two men with a strong desire to unite their families and martial arts schools through marriage. If it had been legal and not frowned upon, they might have decided it would be best to marry each other and solve the issue. But, they aren't homosexual. They are however both sufferers of terminal selfishness.

Soun does have a slight excuse for this. His wife died nearly eleven years earlier and he had never truly been able to overcome his grief. Genma, doesn't have any excuse, he's just Genma.

They had just ended another long night doing 'community work' (That's code for the two of them when they want to go bar hopping and make new grandiose and ineffective plans concerning their children.) They felt pretty good about themselves. The next day they would feel pretty bad all over, having one of those 'ohmigawdicantbeliveidrankthatmuchinonesitting' hangovers, the kind of hangover that you feel all the way to your toes, that you are trying very hard not to throw up.

(If you know what that feels like, and wonder how I do, yes I too, have had those unforgettable nights that I just can't remember. And considering the appearance of the female bedwarming partner I woke with the next day, I'm very happy with that. I do wish I could forget the waking up part too. SHUDDER )

They had just finished polishing out another ultimate 'Get Ranma and Akane Married Immediately' plan. (Or just polishing off one too many bottles of saki.) This plan required stealth, subterfuge and intellect, as well as a new alligator skin wallet, three aggie marbles a jump rope and fifteen bottle caps.

While the two of them were actually skilled at stealth, and subterfuge, the intellect part of the plan seemed to elude them

Arriving at the Tendo Dojo, the two men promptly began to implement the carefully thought out plan. They performed this by crawling most of the way to the veranda/porch and passing out. When Genma woke to the TOO bright, way TOO early morning, he had one thought on his mind. Sluggish as it was normally, it was even more slow because of the hangover and lingering affects of the previous night's binge. That thought was, 'Why in the hell do I have a new alligator skin wallet, three aggie marbles a jump rope and fifteen bottle caps in my pockets?'

………………………………………………

It had taken two weeks at warp three to reach Sol system. This time Paladin spent teaching his daughter conversational Japanese, as well as familiarizing himself with the current events of his 'home planet'. Things were a bit different from what history from his home reality said. The President of the US wasn't who was supposed to be there. But it seemed he wasn't too bad a guy, friendly and open, strong in his dealings with other countries. This man was among the last of his generation to be involved in politics, a World War Two veteran and paralyzed in one arm. This didn't keep him from being the formidable man he was though. There were also minor differences from around the world. The Middle East wasn't the hot bed from Federation history, terrorism on Israel wasn't as much of a problem here.

The Chinese Government seemed to be less belligerent toward the West, while the Former-Soviets were still trying to 'one-up' the Americans. And Macon AeroSpace was a major technological source for the first world countries, and a major employer for several countries around the world. 'At least the necessities were taken care of.' Jerrod thought to himself. 'And more people are employed than would have been otherwise.'

The thing that was truly amazing to Jerrod, he could actually walk into any of the offices of his 'inherited' company and be recognized by at least the senior staff. As would any of his crew and officers.

'Bell should be about to set that ad I'd suggested.' His thoughts continued. He even smiled about that ad; he'd done the layout for it.

Attention: Good people of Japan my name is Jerrod Macon, I'm an American seeking to introduce my daughter to the people and culture of Japan, we are interested in staying with a typical family. The requirements for this family are the ability to be tolerant of possible cultural misunderstandings, and social faux-paus. As well as some minor physical differences possessed by my daughter.

There will be ample monetary compensation for this stay. I do not want to be treated as a guest. I wish to be thought of as the long lost cousin finally come to visit.

If you or someone you know might be interested in this. Contact me through this number x-xx-xxx-xxx-xxxx. (rather than invent a number that could turn out to be real, just assume there is one.)

Possible future employment will be considered at the end of the unspecified term of my stay in Japan. Please, if interested call me now. If I am unavailable leave me a message with my service and I will return your call as soon as possible.

Thank you.

Sincerely Jerrod R. Macon

That piece of advertising would garner a great deal of interest throughout the nation of Japan, if it had been made available to general readership. As it was there was only one copy of one newspaper in the whole country with this ad. It was the back page of the Nerima Times Morning Edition, read (actually just stared at for the morning hours until the school aged teens of his home were out of the house) almost religiously by Soun Tendo.

Soun, currently, was still trying to figure out why he had the value of one American dollar in Indian head nickels, three bicycle spokes, two large 'Happy Birthday' balloons and a quart of gear oil in his pockets. (Yep, another big night of planning had happened.) He was holding the paper up hardly noticing there were words printed on it when his second daughter, Nabiki gasped.

When Nabiki saw the ad staring at her from the back of her father's paper, she took several moments to realize her prayers had been answered! At least that was what it looked like with this ad staring at her. A way to make the money she needed to keep the family and house together and able to feed the bottomless pits (read that as Saotome's)! Except that she really didn't consider it to be that much of a problem where Ranma was concerned. She reached across the table and snagged the paper from her father, who took nearly a full minute to react. By which time he had the paper back in his hands sans the bifolded back page, this Nabiki had in her hands as she stared at the ad to make sure she had seen what she thought she had.

Pinching herself she verified she was NOT dreaming. Her hands shaking as she thought about the possible income to the house, the possibility of giving up her less savory forms of income. And last but not least, maybe even seeing about fixing this problem she had discovered about herself. Imagine the Ice Queen actually feeling a little more than warm when she thought about a certain pig-tailed youth that shared the Tendo home, it just wasn't done! In an effort to combat these feelings Nabiki had resorted to being a bit more manipulative of Ranma lately. She couldn't afford for people to think she liked him, even though it tore her up inside that she did. And she hated having to be cruel to him. What Nabiki hated more was how her sister, Akane, continued to mistreat the boy.

Akane never trusted him, never seemed to care what the answer to any of her questions might be, not that she let Ranma answer to begin with. No, she was more than ready to mallet him, or beat him with her fists, or to call him names that he didn't deserve to be called. This wasn't the first time that Nabiki felt terrible guilt over having foisted the sometimes female, Ranma onto her little sister.

While Nabiki wasn't lesbian or even bisexual, she had decided recently that if she had Ranma, she would be for him. She remembered how sad and lonely he looked when he had arrived. Of course that was before Nabiki knew about the curse. And when she found out, her disappointment from denying herself first dibs on a new boy that didn't know her, and fear of what the curse did shook her. So Nabiki reacted almost cruelly.

Often, over the time Ranma had been part of the house, she'd thought of how she'd managed to hurt her chances to win him from Akane. But, the fool seemed to be devoted to Akane, even to the point of giving his life for her. That mess with the Master of Irish Tenor Martial Arts, Juilo Figarro Shwartzchilde being the most recent. Ranma had learned how to warble his voice at a pitch to shatter granite and warp steel. After that incident Ranma said he'd never sing again.

The next Christmas Party would be a little sadder for the lack of Ranko and her lovely singing voice. (Many people actually believe that Ranma in his girl form can really sing. This isn't true, they are just so involved with daydreaming they don't notice how off key (s)he is.)

He may not love Akane, but the unconditional devotion to her impressed Nabiki. She wondered what it would be like to have that kind of devotion from Ranma herself. She'd been thinking that this morning when she noticed the ad in the paper. She decided to stay home from school today, so she could call the number and interview the man herself.

…………………………………………………………………………………

The bridge was quiet for the most part, only the normal background sounds of a Federation Starship under normal operation in standard orbit, when the 'cell-phone' that Jerrod always carried with him rang. No, it was more of a warbling chirp hiccup.

Jane Kirque got an irritated look on her face, she knew she'd have to wait even longer to get to be with Paladin. The man seemed insistent that she should concentrate on Mark Sumner though. She thought of Mark often, and believed him to be very attractive. But Paladin was a much better catch in her opinion. Sometimes it was all Jane could do to pull herself out of her little dreams about her darling Jerrod. Of course, most of the single women that had ever met Jerrod thought this about him. He was distracting in a most peculiar way, and he seemed to not even realize what he did just by being in the same room with these women. (Fortunately for Jerrod, Jane isn't the nutcase Kodachi is. This woman can tell when she loses.)

(Some years from this point the Nadoka Saotome-Macon Brain Trust would ponder this problem and decide that it is in fact, the 'MANLY MAN EFFECT'. The manner in which masculinity, self assuredness and confidence combine to make a woman experience the documented 'Woobly Syndrome'.)

The sound of the warbling, ringing, chirping hiccup caused Paladin to smile as he answered it. "Jerrod Macon."

"Hello, um, Mr. Macon? I'm Nabiki Tendo and I was wondering about your ad in the paper?" The voice on the other end asked.

Deciding to play the busy CEO game, Jerrod said. "There are many ads in papers all over the world that I am responsible for Ms. Tendo. Which ad are you referring to?" trying to sound a little impatient.

"The one in the Nerima Times, asking about a cultural immersion extended vacation. I hope I'm not too late for consideration on that." The hopeful voice said

"Oh, yes, THAT ad. Yes I did place that ad, and today is the fifth day for it to run. No, you are not too late for consideration, however there have been several other calls from interested parties." Paladin lied. He'd heard a name in the background that confirmed this was in fact the person he had been waiting for to contact him. He wasn't sure about the context, but he did catch Ranma, and hot water and something about having a better day today. As it was another feminine voice, it was too soft to make out everything said.

"Mr. Macon, it would be great to have Americans staying with us, and I promise your daughter will learn a lot about Japan! I'll personally show her around and teach her everything." Paladin could tell this girl was straining to keep herself calm and not beg for him to accept the Tendo home as his residence during his stay.

"Alright Ms Tendo, tell me about your home." He suggested, keying all the information she was giving him into his capacious minds memory.

"Well, my home is the Tendo Dojo, home of the Tendo family School of Anything Goes Martial Arts. We also have access to the Saotome School Of Anything Goes, as the father and son are staying with us for awhile. We have plenty of room with two extra guestrooms. A large living room, and my sister Kasumi is one of the best cooks in Japan!" All of this sounded as if the girl had still been debating whether or not to inform him about all of it, with the decision to do so based on it would be better than having him find out later. It sounded to Paladin as if the part about her sister was easier to decide on than the rest though.

While never having heard of 'Anything Goes Martial Arts' Jerrod assumed it was a version of jeet-kun-do.

"So, a Dojo is on the property? Very good, I'm interested in the Art myself so a place to practice would be very useful to me." Paladin said, keeping it quiet that it didn't matter to him the skill in the kitchen this Kasumi girl has, not to disparage her, but food preparation wasn't high on his list at the moment.

"We're also in walking distance of plenty of shopping, there are several parks with waterways nearby, and there's a great chiropractor who is also a general practitioner just a mile from us. There's also lots of food delivery. And if you take the bus we're less than an hour from downtown Tokyo. And we have several very good schools in the area." The girl seemed to be getting into the 'gotta sell this to the client' game. Based on how excited the girl sounded, while trying to project a matter of fact tone, he took a liking to her, she became more professional as the time on the phone increased.

In fact, if the entire situation had been real, and not the 'mission' it was, he would have bought the whole thing as she sold it to him. Plus any swampland she might happen to have access to. 'This girl is good at this.' He thought. Then he wondered about why such a young sounding girl would have this level of skill at sales. He grinned, because he knew he would find out eventually.

To wrap it up, Paladin let her continue for a couple of more minutes before he broke in. "Ms. Tendo, based on what you have told me. And from the information already provided by the other interested parties, I have no choice."

The pause on the other end was so full of anxiety he couldn't help but smile."…no choice Mr. Macon?" Nabiki asked, her voice faltering just slightly.

'Great control on her,' Jerrod thought. "Yes Ms. Tendo, I have no choice but to accept the proposal you have made. I'll give you to one of my secretaries so you can provide the information I need to contact you for when I arrive in Japan tomorrow.'

"Eep! Tomorrow? I thought it would be a week at least Mr. Macon, we need a little time to prepare for your arrival! Kasumi has to be sure to get enough food for two extra people. And I still need to know if there is anything in the way of special needs we need to obtain for your daughter!" Paladin grinned. 'That got her all flustered didn't it?' He thought, touched that she'd be willing to get any special equipment for his daughter, showing a desire to at least be accepting of someone that was 'different'.

"Please Ms. Tendo, there is nothing to worry about concerning my daughter, it's all taken care of. And as for making preparations for us to arrive, please don't put yourselves out! My secretary will also ask for some information so that I might wire some money to you to make up for this call, and an earnest deposit." He said the last to dangle some bait to see if she bit.

"No! Mr. Macon, a deposit isn't necessary, we can discuss the financial agreement once you arrive! You really don't need to give a deposit."

"Very well, then I'll hand you to my secretary and I will talk to you tomorrow when I arrive." Covering the mouthpiece with his thumb he waited for a few moments and handed it to the yeoman standing nearby. That the Norn had briefed everyone on the 'operation' made it easy to coach all junior staff on the contact information he would require and to push the earnest deposit question a couple of times. This was to see how badly the girl on the other end really wanted to keep the discussion polite and professional. As it was Paladin was amazed at how cool the girl seemed to be regarding it. He could tell that it had been hard for her to not come up with a figure right then.

Her voice had a catch in it when she said it wouldn't be needed. To Paladin it sounded as if the money was more than needed.

Yeoman Clark did a great job as she jotted down the information that Paladin needed. Every now and then asking if Ms. Tendo were sure about the deposit. Paladin pulled up a small display at his seat and motioned for Clark's attention. Showing the display that had been blanked except for an amount that was spelled out for her to say to the girl on the other end of the connection.

It was all Paladin could do to keep from laughing out loud at the report that two people had passed out from his little joke. To make up for it he ordered the funds transferred from the 'companies' accounts to the one listed as Nabiki Tendo's. He then left, handing third watch over to Lt. Brannigan, as he headed to the holo-deck for some much needed practice and then packing for his 'vacation'.

After the two-hour exercise session, Paladin found his way to his quarters where he told Kitty to get her things packed for their trip. He was busy stuffing clothes and small equipment into his pack when someone cleared their throat behind him. Jerrod turned to see a woman with very long silver hair with a fantastic build floating out from the monitor built into the bulkhead.

"I suppose you are a Norn too?" He asked, with a slight flavor of annoyance to his tone.

"Yes I am, you lovely man! I'm Urd, goddess of love and sex appeal. I just wanted to meet you and see if you wanted anything to take with you?" blink, blink She asked with clear suggestive overtones to her question. 'Father! What a masculine mortal! I think he even puts that Hercules guy to shame, build wise. I just have to take a peek.'

Paladin just looked at her and wondered if her sister knew what she was up to. His own reality had legends of the norns, Nordic keepers of the Tapestry of Destinies. Although the names were altered slightly here, the concept seemed to bear out. Evidently this one was actually the spinner from the fables, also the Fate of the past. The sisters were in charge of the destinies of all men. "Thank you Urd, it would be helpful if you could arrange it so that a Macon AeroSpace private jet could be made to be at the Tokyo International Airport tomorrow morning with the appropriate documentation and clearances through customs for us. It would make things a lot easier to explain to my new 'Landlady'." Paladin requested.

Scrunching her face in a cute manner to get a better reaction from him, Urd pouted. "That isn't what I asked! But okay, we'll have it there for you!" then she turned and started to wriggle back through the interface to the other side. Her wriggle obviously intended to get a manly reaction from Paladin.

Paladin mused to himself, 'Woman is pretty, but too rushed about things. It must come from virtual immortality and lots of boredom, although, it would be nice to take her to dinner sometime. I wonder at the cost of getting too involved with her, she might not take 'No' too well.' Paladin finished packing his gear, being careful to select the equipment that had been camouflaged to appear as appropriate to the time and technological level available.

He had thought it lucky that the available technology of this earth was not too different from the same period in the history of his world. It made making tricorders and portable computers much easier to conceal and disguise. The field med kit was a bit more difficult, but they did manage to make it look near enough to what the local first-aid kits looked like. The tricorder was a general use field unit with the appearance of a pocket calculator, and it even functioned as a calculator.

The portable computer was just that, while looking like a current day early 1990's laptop, it was far more advanced. The operating system was far more useful than the three or four most popular ones in use on the planet below. He had taken the opportunity to study what was known about those operating systems and had his portable configured to emulate the most used.

No need to have questions asked that would be very difficult to answer regarding that. His portable was going along with him for several reasons. It would make his personal logs and duty logs easier to keep updating, he'd have data analysis available for those times when the ship was off on a patrol or running back to New Home.

And Kitty could maintain her schoolwork.

While Kitty loved to learn new things, she really wasn't happy Daddy was going to make her study on the trip. It didn't seem fair that she had to take that history test in a few days and hoped he might forget about giving it to her.