*KIND REMINDER: English isn't my language*
Hardest of Hearts
There is love in your body but you can't get it out, it gets stuck in your head, won't come out of your mouth. Sticks to your tongue and shows on your face that the sweetest of words have the bitterest taste… Darling heart, I loved you from the start but you'll never know what a fool I've been, darling heart, I loved you from the start but that's no excuse for the state I'm in…
As the days went by Teddy's health continued to improve considerably, one of the fastest recoveries she had seen, Amelia said. With the help of a linguistic coach and above all, a lot of patience, Teddy recovered her speech in only days and although she was still far from being her old and bubbly being and there were times when she had trouble remembering certain words, she was able to express herself with more or less clear and complete sentences.
Days after her awakening the external support in her leg was removed, leaving it now with a cast but luckily the wound in her bones was healing wonderfully, or at least that was what Dr. Brown said. For her part Amelia gave better results every day on her neurological health until there was nothing else to do on her part but leave the case in charge of Dr. Brown, once he considered it pertinent Teddy could go home and start with her rehabilitation.
True to his word Owen didn't separate from Teddy's side for a moment, almost every day he brought her some gift or something to entertain herself; pastries, books, flowers, some magazine or medical journal, beauty and hygiene products, board games or crosswords to pass the time on rainy and boring afternoons but above all to stimulate and activate her mind. Every day he helped her with her stretches to the point of being a complete pain in the ass every time the physiotherapist recommended certain stretches and he made thousands of observations or questioned his knowledge. Owen could see the discomfort and annoyance in Teddy's face but he only did it for her own sake, probably when all this happened she would appreciate it. However, someone who didn't see this with good eyes was Arizona, who could notice how each day Teddy depended more on Owen's presence.
One afternoon, when Owen came into the hospital after going home for a new rucksack with clean clothes, in his hands he carried a huge bouquet of red roses and a gift bag, heading straight to the elevators he ran into Arizona who had just been on Teddy's room.
"Hunt... Are you going with Teddy?" Arizona asked.
"You know I am."
"Well, I've come to see her, maybe you want to take your time, she's asleep, she don't need you now." Arizona said in a slightly annoyed tone, earning a questioning look from Owen. "Red roses, huh? Who are they for? For Carina? I say it because the last thing that is given to a 'friend' ". Arizona made the quotation mark with her fingers. "Are red roses, that's why I assume they are not for her."
"Well, you're assuming wrong, they are for Teddy."
"You haven't talked to her, have you?"
"No, I haven't, because there's nothing to talk about, now if you'll excuse me." Owen said, heading gain to the elevators.
"I talked to her". Immediately Owen turned to look at her. "Between best friends we don't hide anything and Teddy deserves to know what floor she is standing on."
"You had no right to tell her anything."
"And you had no right to behave like a jerk. Do you think I didn't see you kissing Carina? I told you, that Teddy was going to get attached and she doesn't deserve to be attached to a man who doesn't love her."
"And how are you so sure I don't love her?"
Arizona let out a humorless laugh. "How do I know? Well, let me see... Maybe because until a few months ago you were married to Amelia at whom you used to call, 'the love of your life'? Not to mention she was your second 'love of your life'. Or maybe because until a few weeks ago you were Carina's fling? I don't know, you tell me.
"I love her, Arizona."
"Yeah, well, whatever helps you sleep at night... Oh, and by the way, Teddy hates red roses." And with that Arizona turned around and left Owen alone with his thoughts.
Damn it! It was true, Teddy hated red roses, for her they seemed so basic and wonted. But Owen didn't have time to think about that, he was dying to know what Arizona and Teddy talked about, he supposed that Arizona's reaction was due, yes, that she cared about Teddy, but most of all because she was jealous of what had happened between him and Carina, however, that wasn't what played with his mind, but the fact that for the very first time since he knew Teddy he had recognized to someone else, out loud, that he loved her. The last time he had been involved in a similar situation he wasn't clear about his feelings for her, he knew he had great affection, but love, he had it for another woman who finally left him to pursue her true and only love, surgery.
All the way to Teddy's room, Owen didn't stop thinking about the words he had told Arizona, but for the moment he preferred not to do anything about it, he wanted to tempt the waters but first of all he wanted to realize if this feeling was true love or just the immense desire he had to protect and take care of Teddy. Whoever had heard that would have told him that that and love, were millimeters away, if not that it were the same.
Sure enough, when he came into the room Teddy was sound asleep. The poor had had a terrible night, the pain in her leg and her back made impossible for her to sleep for more than an hour, so he crept in and placed her rucksack in the closet, put the gift and the flowers on the table at the foot of the bed and stood next to Teddy, watching her, her face looked tired but serene, her hair lacked shine and her skin color, her natural slightly-golden tan had disappeared, her cheekbones looked too prominent, she had already lost almost 15 pounds and every week she kept losing weight, that worried Owen tremendously, although to tell the truth everything that happened with her worried him, from whether she was comfortable in bed to if her leg or head hurt.
After a few hours, when Teddy finally woke up, she found Owen lying on the couch reading a book, as if sensing her awakening he left what he was doing and sat on the couch.
"Hey, you're awake." Owen whispered.
"What time is it?" Teddy asked a little disoriented.
"Almost 10:00 PM, you slept more than 6 hours and you skipped dinner." He replied with a huge smile walking towards her bed.
"I'm starving".
"I'll ask the kitchen to have your dinner brought in".
"Thank you". Whispered Teddy
"You're welcome." He replied, caressing her cheek softly with the tops of his fingers. "Is there anything else you want?" Teddy just shook her head slightly and tilted her against his hand; there was something strange in Owen's eyes that confused her too much, even more after her talk with Arizona, but she would talk about that with him later.
Once the nurse arrived with Teddy's dinner without thinking twice she buried the fork in her food, she didn't care that it was tasteless or that she hated cooked carrots, she was so hungry she would even eat the fruit cup and the lemon jelly. Owen couldn't stop smiling as he watched her eat.
"Well, you were hungry."
"You have no idea". She answered with her mouth full of food.
"I'm glad you're recovering your appetite, I worried so much when you woke up and you didn't want to taste a mouthful, you lost a lot of weight."
"Well, now I'm catching up." She said, shyly. After a few minutes in silence she finally dared to talk what was corroding her insides. "Owen, can I ask you something?"
"Sure!"
"What are you doing here? Or rather, why are you still here?"
Owen was stunned, he thought that Teddy had clear that he was there because he cared about her, because he was her best friend or just, even though it sounded horrible, because he was her only support system, all she had. Not even Arizona supported her more than him.
"What do you mean with why am I here? It is not obvious?"
Oh no, Teddy felt that this was going to be a complicated conversation, she only prayed that her words could be enough to express everything she wanted, she hated this situation, not being able to express herself properly when she needed the most. "I've healed Owen, the rest... I can hire a physiotherapist or a nurse."
"You mean you don't need me anymore?" Owen asked, offended.
"NO! No, no, no... Haaaa!" Teddy grumbled giving small taps on her head, her words beginning to fail her.
"Ok Teddy, this will not do you any good. Why don't we just leave this talk for later?"
"No Owen, I need this... I need... ammm... to clear this up ... I don't want you to feel... Compromised? Is that the word?"
"Yes, compromise, yes… and this isn't any compromise Teddy, I do this because I want to and because I care about you".
"But you have a life, it's not... fair?" Owen nodded. "It's not fair that you leave everything to be caring for a cripple."
"Don't you ever say that again!" Owen warned.
"It's the truth! I'm crippled! I don't know when I'll walk properly again, God! I don't know if I'll talk as an adult again!"
"You will do it again Teddy, this is just temporary, with mental exercises, therapies and rehabilitations soon everything will be as before."
"I know... but I want us to leave something clear… Once I have healed completely each one will follow their path, you will return with your girlfriend and I will return to Germany."
"My... My girlfriend? Teddy but what…"
"I know that Dr. DeLuca is your girlfriend and I don't want misunderstandings... the last time it cost us too much... so... for the sake of our friendship..."
"Ok, I'll say this just once and I will not repeat it again, first of all, Carina is not my girlfriend and I haven't seen her for weeks, and second of all, I'm here because it's my will, because you're my best friend and because you've been with me in countless difficult times so you will not get rid of my so easy Theodora." Owen said, firmly.
Teddy was speechless, but she shuddered at the term "best friend", yes "Attachment Barbie", she couldn't help it or rather she had never been un-attached of Owen, and his actions in recent weeks only reinforced her attach even more, in the end she just smiled, she could only thank Owen's attention, her best friend. "Please, don't say that name again." Teddy said, a little more cheerfully.
Owen couldn't help but laugh. "It's your name, Theodora! How do you want me to call you?"
"You know I hate my name, why do you keep saying it?!" Trying to sound angry but failing on keeping a straight face.
"It's to bother you, Theodora, it's part of my job as a best friend."
"What a best friend." Teddy said pretending offended.
Yes, best friend, it was all that at the moment he could be for Teddy, Owen continued thinking about the idea of being something else for her, but he wasn't sure of wanting to cross that line that she had imposed. Would it be worth it? Or would everything be a disaster like the last time? Only time would tell.
That night Owen couldn't sleep, his mind, the countless of questions and everything he wanted to talk with Teddy didn't leave him, it was as if there was a war in his head, so making sure that Teddy was asleep, took his jacket and left the room without realizing that she was actually awake, only that she kept her eyes closed, realizing the moment when he left.
Owen wandered the corridors of the Grey Sloan Memorial, went to the gardens to take a breath, hoping to clear his head a little, went through the ORs to see who was in surgery and just at that moment Carina DeLuca was leaving one of them, both remained standing staring into each other eyes, after a few seconds without thinking twice Owen threw himself at her and crashed his lips with hers, taking her by the waist and guiding her to the nearest on call room...
Song: Hardest of Hearts - Florence + The Machine (I feel this song is so Owen&Teddy :/)