"A fridge. A fridge. We're actually the butt of every junkyard joke ever made."
Eggsy tried to shift around so he wasn't twisted into a pretzel. He mostly just got the egg tray lodged more snugly into his ribs.
The thing about fridges was that Eggsy wasn't sure how it was physically possible to fit two people inside one. Of course, since they were trying not to die, they'd figured it out. At least this time Eggsy had a torch.
Eggsy looked up at Harry. He didn't have to see far, only about four centimeters. "We've got to stop meeting like this," he said with a little grin.
Harry huffed, sending a brush of air against Eggsy's cheek. Harry, because he was taller and less easily contorted, was wedged into the upper corner in an L-shape that didn't look any more comfortable than Eggsy felt, half-crouching between Harry's wide-spread feet losing feeling in his legs.
"This is damn convenient, actually. I made plans." Eggsy slid down the side of the fridge the whole fifteen centimeters it took to be kneeling and set the torch on the floor.
Honestly, he'd given blow jobs in less comfortable positions.
Eggsy dragged the palm of his hand up Harry's thigh, long and solid and tense as iron, covered in fine-woven fabrics that kissed Eggsy's skin for the trip, until his fingers brushed against the fever-hot hardness between his legs. Harry's bitten off moan became the real thing a moment later when Eggsy slid his hand over and palmed his cock through his trousers.
"Eggsy," Harry said his name like a curse, harsh and gasping, and it licked down along Eggsy's nerves and brought his blood low on the ride.
Harry's eyes were wild and blazing when he looked up, his hair a mess twice over from the mission and hanging around in fridges about to have Eggsy blow him. Eggsy trailed his fingers up to his belt buckle.
"You gonna stop me?" Eggsy asked. He winked for good measure.
It was the wink that made Harry snap. He fisted one hand in Eggsy's tattered blazer and dragged him up into a bruising kiss, biting and intoxicating, taking almost all of Eggsy's weight when his legs refused to hold him bent at the angles they were. Then Harry dropped him back to his knees, tangling his fingers in Eggsy's hair.
"Go on then," he growled.
Eggsy, flushed, panting, and tenting his trousers, didn't need any more encouragement. He had Harry's belt and zipper undone with dexterity and speed he'd perfected stripping guns, and then Harry's cock was finally in his hands with nothing blocking him from feeling the smooth heat of him. Harry groaned breathlessly.
It was a real shame Eggsy couldn't see all that well. Harry was thick and heavy, long enough that he was going to have to work for this but not intimidatingly so. He fisted one hand on the shaft, stroked and watched as he milked a drop of pre-come out along with a hiss from between Harry's teeth, his mouth watering at the sight.
"You Jewish?" Eggsy asked, drawing the pad of his thumb around the raised edge of the head.
"Superstitious grandmother," Harry rumbled, then, "Eggsy."
Eggsy grinned, then parted his lips and took Harry's cock into his mouth.
"Fuck." Harry dropped forward onto his forearm against the wall of the fridge, fingers tightening in Eggsy's hair just shy of painful. Eggsy shivered and tongued along Harry's cock, slicking him up so he could draw back with ease, then set about working Harry deeper into his throat. Harry's breath was harsh and fast above him, his hip where Eggsy's free hand had drifted shaking with the effort of holding still.
When Harry's cock bumped the back of Eggsy's throat Harry almost buckled, a broken little curse falling from his lips as the trembling spread. Eggsy swallowed around him and felt proud of himself. It'd been a damn long while since he'd sucked anyone off, but apparently not long enough to forget the mechanics.
Harry felt thicker against his lips than he had in Eggsy's hands, pulsing along his tongue and twitching with need. He whined at the thought of what it would feel like properly inside him and Harry made a strangled noise when the vibration traveled into his cock. Eggsy let go of Harry's hips, looked up invitingly.
Making Harry snap was evidently one of his talents. Harry's fingers shifted from pawing to controlling in the instant he took Eggsy's invitation and unleashed his pent-up energy. Eggsy's hands scrabbled for purchase on Harry's clothes as Harry fucked into his mouth, rough and desperate and wonderful.
Harry sounded like he'd gone to goddamn pieces since Eggsy got to his knees. Eggsy listened with a thrill bouncing up and down his spine while his fingertips curled into the leg of Harry's trousers. He at last dropped a hand to his own cock and stroked himself through the dampening fabric. The angle was awkward, but it felt so blindingly good that he moaned around Harry's cock again, and this time Harry made a wounded sound and shoved against the back of Eggsy's throat as he came.
Eggsy would have cursed if Harry hadn't been holding him in place, making him swallow thickly as Harry's come spilled in his mouth. Stars flashed in his vision as he struggled for air, tears prickling at the corners of his eyes from the press, and the lightheaded feeling paired with the gasping, hitching sounds Harry was making almost, almost got him off.
Harry blew out a long breath and at last tugged Eggsy back, then up as Eggsy sucked in air. Eggsy whined when their lips met and Harry plundered his mouth, as if enjoying finding tastes of himself on Eggsy's tongue. Harry slipped a hand down between them, too bent to do more than gently rub, and Eggsy arched as much as he could and broke away.
"Harry, Harry I need more, I can't-"
"You've come close enough before." Harry growled, and that did it - the first time he'd ever acknowledged that these things happened often.
Eggsy came on a strangled cry, right in his pants like some spotty kid with Harry fucking smirking against his lips. Before he'd even come down Harry was kissing him again.
Eggsy fucking loved kissing Harry. Whether Harry was desperate and high on adrenaline or calm and oddly sweet, like now, he doubted he'd ever get enough of it (not the least because it only happened once in a blue moon).
At length Harry drew back, nuzzled against his cheek, down his jaw, started sucking little marks into the skin of his throat.
"Fuck, I've got a kink in my neck the size of Los Angeles. When we getting out of here?" Eggsy asked as the euphoria seeped away, settling in his bones.
"We've no way of gauging the radiation levels outside. We have to wait for extraction," Harry replied, moving down to his collar.
"Well it's a good thing you're a cuddler then, yeah?"
At this Harry drew back and glowered at his shining grin.
"You two done in there?" A voice called, and Eggsy's grin froze.
"Roxy?" He called back, aiming for nonchalant and missing by a mile to land in the ballpark of mortified.
"Yeah. You know that whole fridge thing is a myth, right?"
Eggsy looked at Harry, who frowned and opened the door.
"Only for surviving an actual blast. The older ones are lined with lead, which is better than nothing when stewing in fallout." Harry climbed out and started off at a leisurely pace that would discredit any accusation that he was running away.
"Can never be too careful." Eggsy offered, still in the fridge.
Roxy glanced at him and her eyebrows shot into her hairline. She might have been convinced that nobody was fucking anybody at the sight of Harry, but Eggsy had never mastered the art of looking less than wrecked after any kind of good shag. Plus, he would bet a month's pay his lips were still lipstick-red.
"You, ah, been out there a while?" he asked with false lightness.
"Only ten or so minutes to check the radiation levels," she replied with equally false lightness.
"Couldn't have let us know about that sooner?"
Roxy shrugged "If the fridge is a-rocking, don't come a-knocking, I figured."
Well shit, Eggsy thought. Harry was going to be impossible after this.