Haywire
You know, this situation is making me think of an old line I heard from the humans once: If looks could kill, I'd be dead. Well, that's how I feel right about now. Nothing ever goes according to plan, my corruption is a fine example of it, but this is ridiculous. Chell flippin' hates my very existence and would probably love to go throw me into the nearest incinerator she can find.
Alright, note to self: angry people are scary people. When I first came in here, I wasn't exactly expecting the "Welcome Wagon," (however delightful it may sound) from her, but maybe not a reaction quite as harsh. It's true! She's glaring bloody daggers at me! I didn't even know anybody could make themselves look that menacing! Well, She could since She could kill me in less than a nanosecond.
Oh, you see that there? Now, she's getting annoyed and impatient. Well, I would be to if the person I hated came waltzing up to my house all willy-nilly. I...just described myself there, didn't I? Hmm…yes, I did. But what else am I supposed to do, cartwheel for her? I can barely move on my own! I mean, I a huge mess here! Wait, I actually am…a bit of oil is starting to creep onto the table. At least, I hope that's oil. No, I don't hope that's oil! I hope it's something not harmful to her just sitting there, but I hope it's not oil because that would mean that I'm dying or something. I don't want to die right now.
I try to speak to her, but I just can't! Why is it all so hard to say? It's a simple apology that I need to get out there or I'll die from guilt. Is that even possible, to die from guilt? I mean, I was losing little brain chips every time Space Core said something beyond idiotic. Wow, it's a wonder I'm not dead already. I mean, I wasn't destroyed by space rubbish, I wasn't immediately destroyed upon re-entry, and Chell hasn't tried to kill me yet so that's a plus.
Augh! What in the world was that loud noise? Oh, now that probably damaged something! I look towards the origin of the noise and sure enough, it's Chell. I think she just clapped really loud. She's got this weird expression on her face, a mix of telling me to go die in a hole and, at the same time, demanding that I say something. I better do what she wants me to.
"So, um...you're probably wondering how I got back, so...I'll just start off by telling you!" I say while trying my best to "smile." Another glare is sent my way and I snap back to standard position. Chell can be flippin' terrifying when she wants to be. Reminds me of a time back at the facility when Horror Core tried to freak me out with an old ghost story. Didn't believe a word of it, but it did make me wary of the effects that fish shaped ethyl benzene has on one's AI. Horrible thing really, I think that's how Anger Core got so...crazy for lack of a better term. Then there are all the other robots who scream for no reason at all. Scary stuff right there, scary stuff.
Her sharp little cough brings me back to reality. Right, I need to apologize now or within the next 12.5 minutes or else my system will go into emergency shut down and-wait, emergency shut down? Oh, how flippin' convenient! Look, there's even a little countdown clock in my optic! See? Actually, that aspect is pretty convenient. Alright, um…saving recent memories, addressing damage…done. Oh, now this doesn't look good. Looks like I've got some major internal damage that I can't seem to pinpoint just yet. Maybe if I do something else for a while…Oh, right, right, right, I have to start apologizing now. But how do I start?
"You know, I really love what you've done with the place. Great furniture, I absolutely love the couch and the chandelier above me." She rolls her eyes and grunts. Great, not only have I made a proper idiot of myself, but now I've made her angrier! I need to fix this fast.
"Alright, I'm going to say what I need to now. Chell, it's been a while and I know you're still quite, as you humans would say it, pissed off at what I did. I mean, who wouldn't be? I betrayed you, tried to kill you, stuck you and Her together for hours, created evil traps, made-this isn't helping my cause at all, is it?" She shakes her head, all the while maintaining a steady glare. Now that takes some skill. I wish I could do that, but I'd have to shake my optic to convey something like that. Trust me when I say that everything starts moving on its own once I start doing that.
"Yes, what I'm getting at is-oh no." I clench my eye shut as best as I can with a broken cover shield. These weird electric tremors keep passing through my body, making it harder and harder to process everything. It happened a bit on the ride up here, but now it's just flippin' painful. In fact, it's even more painful than when She crushed me and I had to be repaired while functioning. How else could I have survived that? I was thrown onto the ground without a second thought and I still had to think of a way to make it out alive. Now there's one experience I could live without. But the tremors…what are they from?
It's starting to subside now and I open my optic fully again. The first thing I see is her, still steaming at the mere sight of me, glare and all remaining on her features. You know, when you actually look at her, she is rather beautiful and lovely. Wait, what am I thinking? I need to apologize right away and I'm not about to get held up from her appearance!
"Ok, I'm ready. Chell, after everything that's happened, I realize that-GAH!" What the bloody Hell? I just felt something inside of me switch off and break. Another surge passes through me and this time, I can't help but let out a tiny yelp of pain. Something big just happened and I have no clue what it is. Oh, maybe it is a virus and I'm going to die after I go into forced Sleep Mode in...6.1 minutes. No! I need to apologize! I need more time to get my thoughts straight. I hate it when things don't come out the way they sound in my head.
"Alright, here we go, I'm really going to do it this time." I sigh first, prepping myself for what is to come. But this time feels strangely different...like I actually know what to say.
"Chell, we haven't seen each other in nearly a decade. I'm sure you forgot about me along the way, but I didn't forget about you." Some emotion flashes quickly across her face, seems like that last part was a little too familiar for her. "No, not in the 'I'm going to kill you for leaving me in space,' kind of way. Throughout all the years I was stuck in space, the only thing I've ever wanted to do was apologize." I pause for a moment to let the information sink in. She looks less hostile now, though still keeping up her original intense demeanor. At least now it looks like she doesn't want to kill me quite yet. I'm still expecting her to pull out a hammer or some other tool of the sort to bash me into pieces. Although, I think she'd be better suited with a crowbar...ah! Focus Wheatley, focus!
"I will admit, at first I was quite angry. I mean, you can't blame me for that! If I didn't feel like that, I'd probably be mad! Anyway, I want to sincerely apologize for what I did to you back in the facility. If I could, I would travel back in time and prevent myself from ever downloading my personality into that corrupted mainframe. That was a pretty stupid idea once I thought about it. Why I ever believed I could run that place, nobody will ever know." I look right into her still narrowed eyes. "I don't expect you to forgive me right away, but perhaps given enough time...which would be quite a lot under the circumstances but maybe, we could be friends again. That, or there's the option of killing me right here, right now, your choice, up to you. If you do choose the latter, please kill me as quickly and painlessly as possible." She contemplates my offers as my thoughts race. I guess I'll be happy either way; I got my wish, but the former option would be ideal. Oh, for God's sake! Another bloody surge!
...
She looks beautiful when she's in deep thought about my fate. I can see why I love her, so majestic and mysterious. I can only wonder what she's thinking right now...but the fact that she's thinking of me just warms me to my central power core. If only I could explain exactly what I feel when I see her...
"Chell, there's something else I want to tell you," I say softly, my voice smooth and precise. I'm just going to start up again, regardless of whether she is looking at me or not. Either way, she can still hear me. AT least, I think she can.
"Chell, I love you." Now that got her attention. Her eyes widen with surprise and horror.
I wonder why she's so surprised...
Oh no, did I just say what I think I said? Did I just confess? What the-how...why did I flippin' say that! The feeling, the raw emotion just came over me so suddenly. Why did that happen? How did it happen? I'm not supposed to feel anything as strong as love, yet here I am, sitting on a table expressing whatever emotion that just so happens to show its face in my circuitry. She probably hates me even more now.
*Emergency Shut Down Activated*
~Beginning Procedure~
Shut Down Preparation: 5 seconds
What? No, no, no! This is all wrong! I didn't mean to confess, it just...happened! I wasn't supposed to say that yet! I don't even know what love really is! Why did I make the biggest mistake of my life? This wasn't supposed to be! I need to take it back, but how do you go about fixing something like this? How do you tell someone that your confession was just a flippin' accident, a slip of the tongue?
*Error Reached*
~Defective Controller~
Shut Down Preparation: Still Online, 3 seconds
My hearing and sight begin to fade as the shut down takes its course. Everything is getting so hard to process...so hard to think straight. Did that warning say something about the Controller? Isn't that the thing for excess emotions? Or is it for the calorimeter experiment? Maybe it's the Geiger counter. I have no clue why I'd need that piece of equipment, I'm made to handle radiation for if I wasn't, I'd have been destroyed and burned to a crisp already. And crazy, but who am I to judge that last one?
I fall on my side and my blurring vision flips...well, sideways. I can barely make out Chell now. I can hardly think straight right now.
…
Birds aren't very nice animals you know, they steal potatoes. Potatoes are nice…I knew one potato that said nice things. I think it was a battery. How can a potato be a battery? Aren't they edible? Why would a potato talk in the first place? Why would a turret talk? Why do I even talk?
…
What the bloody Hell was I just thinking about?
*Shut Down Initiated*
~Goodnight~
I've heard stories about the Emergency Shut Down. Most Personality Cores don't come back online. There's not really a big need to since there are so many of us. But, I don't think I'm ready to sleep. Maybe my luck will hold out for another hour or so…
As the last of reality fades away, it seems as though there is enough time for one more thought.
Will I wake up?
A/N: Hooray! There's a little cliff hanger at the end for you. :) Whoa, this got how many reviews? O.o Thanks so much!
As for Wheatley's OOC-ness, it's the first sign you get of his degradation. The Controller is meant to cancel out excess emotions to prevent Wheatley from focusing on anything other than science. When activated, he can feel simple versions of happiness, sadness, anger, etc. With it now deactivated and malfunctioning, his emotions are going completely haywire and increasingly difficult to control. See, I told you his luck would go sour.
A Chell chapter is up next. Don't be mistaken, she's still pissed at Wheatley. At the moment, she's in shock and has cooled off a bit. I'll get more into that next chapter. I'm going to take a break and I'll update once more on 4/29 or 4/30; I just realized how hilarious Stephen Merchant is and I'm hooked on watching videos of him on YouTube. I guess he's going on a stand-up tour and I think he'll be in the US on December, 26 of this year. So…I'll update in a few days. The good thing about cliff hangers is that I'm going to be 5 times more obligated to update once I recover from this little excursion.
I promise you all, this story will not be abandoned; I just need one night to myself. This story was started on the night of 4/22 and I need to take a break before my brain overloads from all the writing I've been doing. So, I'll come back with a Chell chapter soon, I promise promise.