i'm soooooooooooooooooooooo sorry to everyone who's reading. i am currently in a new obsession: tokio hotel fanfics. soo much hottness. oh god. *fans herself* anyway, hope you guys forgive me. i moved a bit fast with the club chapter, and i think things didn't go that well. there's lots of stuff for me to figure out, and the next chapter will be out soon. promise.

Blood. So much blood, everywhere. Cemmy had blood all over her, and she didn't even know if any of it was hers. A limp, barely conscious body was in her arms, and it was his blood theyu were covered in. When he blinked, his eyes stayed shut longer than Cemmy could stand to watch. When he opened them again, his eyes held affection for the girl, and Cemmy had to force herself to smile for him. HIs eyes fell shut.

They didn't open again.

---

Cemmy awoke with a start, hand pressed over her mouth, and sprinted to the bathroom, hangover and all. She kneeled in front of the toilet and heaved almost painfully, emptying her stomache. "God," she muttered, wiping her mouth on the sleeve of her pajama top. It was morning already. She'd better get downstairs. Everyone was already up. She looked down. Her hands were shaking. "Coffee. I just need coffee," she told herself.

She stood and washed her face, brushed her teeth, and combed her hair back into a messy bun. She tilted her head, and stared at herself for a moment. "Well, as usual, this is as good as it's gonna get." She wasn't talking about her appearance. Then she went downstairs.

---

Everyone watched in awe and a little disgust as Cemmy ate a bolw of cornflakes with vanilla yogurt instead of milk, and honey, along with a huge cup of coffee, mixed with chocolate syrup. and olives. "I've been thinking about this all night, in my sub-conscious," Cemmy admitted. No one answered, but Troy did his best to tear his gaze away. Once he managed to do that, all his brain power was focused on his French toast. Not a whole lot of brain power, but it would have to do.

"Guys," Cemmy said, pushing her hair back, and licking a spot of chocolate off her thumb, "I have to go; there's some things I have to do today. They're... kind of important. Some friends I haven't seen if a while, promised I'd visit." SHe grabbed the aspirin from next to Jason, who had been cradling it like a baby, and popped to pills into her mouth, swallowing them dry. "Thanks, Shar, Ry, I had a great time last night." She gave Chad a little peck on the lips, grabbed her bag off the counter, and left without another word.

---

It was raining. Hard, and there were no signs of it stopping soon. Cemmy was sitting in the mud, back against a large tree. She was soaked. What was she doing here? There was nothing left here for her, for them. Not after all that. She pulled her cell out of her pocket and dialed Chad's number. ONe, two, three rings, and he picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hey," Cemmy said, pulling in a shaky breath. "Do you... Can you come with me? To see a friend? I really want you to meet him. Please?" she pleaded.

"Okay," Chad answered, concerned. "Cem, are you okay? You sound weird."

"I'm fine. Where are you? I'll come pick you up."

---

Chad was worried, but Cemmy wasn't telling him anything. He knew she'd tell him in her own time, so it was best to leave her alone. She was actually not playing any form of rock for once. Madonna's "Like A Prayer" was playing. it was kind of scary.

"This song is so sad," Cemmy said, closing her eyes when she felt that familiar pull at her throat.

Chad looked surprised. "Why? Like a Prayer is one of Madonna's best songs."

"I know. It's just... listen to the lyrics. She's in pain. She puts this guy a a golden pedestal, and there's no way he can love her back. It's like he's too good for her; no, not even that. It's that she adores him, in a way that's just not healthy, and there's no possible chance to get that feeling back."

"I don't quite get it."

"Well, see, it's happy too. Like, the first verse. Life's all suckish because no one really has anyone for real, but when this person is with her she feels safe, even if she can't really be with him. "I can take you there", I think it means that even though this person is unattainable, if he weren't, she'd do everything for him; she just wants him to know that she'll be his everything. Just like he's everything to her. And then, one of the last parts, "Just like a prayer, you voice can take me there/ Just like a muse to me, you are a mystery/ Just like a dream/ You are not what you seem/ Just like a prayer, no choice you voice can take me there". Wll, that's sad too, but it's like... he's so incredable, he's not even real to her, you know? Like that level of perfection can only bee acheived in her dreams. That's why she says "muse"; it's like something that inspires you, something holy, like a god. And the last line, "No choice your voice can take me there". Even though he can't be with her, he takes her place she can't get to on her own, and she wants to do the same for him. And she can, but she can't 'cause they can't be together like that."

For once Chad thinks Cemmy might like Kelsi a whole lot more than she can handle. But the moment was gone as quickly as it came, and she ejected the disc, replacing it with another. "November Rain started up, and not another word was spken till they arrived.

It was still raining. Cemmy had left her car in a parking lot, and had taken Chad's hand, dragging him thorugh a maze of gravestones. Chad tried to keep up with her pace and finally said loudly over the srain, "Cemmy? Is this friend of yours by any chance dead?"

"Yeah," she said. She stopped finally in front of a grave. The stone said Acheron Cheshire. "Hey you," Cemmy said softly, her voice laced with affection. "Sorry I haven't been around much. Things have been busy." Without turning away, she gestured for Chad to come closer. "This is Chad, my boyfriend. I'm sure Jay told you about us. I really hope you'll be able to meet Kelsi one of these days. Ryan too. Look, it's raining buckets out here. I'll come back later, 'kay, sweetie? I love you." She kissed the wet gravestone, and ran her fingers over the name engraved. Then she stood, and pulled Chad away. Only a a few feet away, behind the grave and off to the side. If a person were in it's place, they wouldn't have been able to see the two.

Cemmy was quiet. "That was my brother, Acheron, but we called him Ace. That's why I have the ace of spades on my neck. He died last year."

"What happened?"

"He was gay. People didn't really like that. And he was beaten up a lot. ONe day they just... went too far." Cemmy's eyes glazed over slightly as she remebered what had happened.

%%%%

Cemmy felt fear stirring in the pit of her stomach. The sickening sound of a baseball bat coming in contact with flesh vibrated in her ears, and she started running towards an alley, where a light was on. She saw six figures, surrounding a seventh, and she thought the worst, which turned out to be true. Ace was practically swimming in a pool of his blood. Before doing anything, Cemmy pulled out her celll phone and dialed 911, informing the woman on the line of what was happening and where she was. She was rather hysterical, but she knew if they heard her, and knew the poilce were coming, they wouldn't waste their time beating her up as well, as they had on numerous other occasions.

They saw her and ran, and Cemmy did nothing to stop it. She dropped down on her knees beside her brother, pulling his body close. She was cold and losing lots of blood. "Ace? Sweetie? Ace, look at me. It's me Cemmy, open your eyes, please," she begged, and finally he complied.

His eyes were completely devoid of fear, but they were still nearly identical to hers. He couldn't speak, but his eyes showed all his love for his only sister and best friend. She made herself smile, and kept herself from crying. She would only scare him. "I love you," she whispered. He took her hand, and she squeezed it. She returned the pressure. He began taking longer to open his eyes when he blinked as if he were tired, and he was. After a few moments, he didn't open them at all. Cemmy squeezed her eyes shut so tight she saw stars, and when the pressure in her hand went away, she felt tears fall down, and saw them mingle with the blood on her dearest friend's face.

%%%%

"I was so scared they were gonna hurt him. They had to pry him away from me." Chad couldn't tell what were tears and what were raindrops anymore. "There was blood everywhere, and him, on me... I don't even remember what happened after that."

Chad could comfort her in only one way. He wrapped his arms around her, as the sobs wracked her body. They stood there until longer after she stopped crying. Around them, the rain continued to fall.

feedback makes me world go round. please, make me dizzy.