Edward's POV
Why was I letting it bother me? So what if she was with someone else right now?
I had dragged my feet all the way back to Alice's place in a bitter mood but didn't understand it one bit.
Isabella Swan was nothing to me.
At least that's what I kept telling myself.
I'd picked myself up a deluxe cheese pizza on the way and a six pack of Heineken and planned on vegging out in front of the TV with Humphrey for the night.
It hadn't gone to plan.
Instead I wound up pacing the room and talking to the dog like it was fucking Dr. Phil or something.
"I mean what does it matter right?" I asked and the dog cocked its head to the side, "It's not like she wouldn't have ever been with other guys? She's a woman and she's definitely..." I gestured with my hands as if tracing her now well developed body, while my eyes glassed over for a second. I pictured her stood a few feet away as she had this morning in that fucking orange-ish colored hoodie.
I'm sure she used to have one exactly like that back in school. I loved her in it. My hands always managed to find their way under its warmth when ever we made out. They liked nothing better than to be palming her amazing...
The sudden straining feeling in my pant's made me curse her again.
"Why can't I stop fucking thinking about her? Why is it bothering me? Her being alone with another man… his hands where mine should be…" I was talking like I expected Humphrey to understand me and bark out something profound." Wait why would I want to go there with my hands?" I slumped on the couch as my memories of the two of us engulfed my mind.
------Flash back-----
"Are you sure you want to do this?" I asked. I was just as nervous as she was.
"Edward, if you're not, then we don't have to." She ran her hand down my chest
"No! I mean yes... I want this. Of course I want this but do you? If you're not ready then..." She stopped me with the sweetest kiss.
Oh God, we were really going to do it.
My mind raced over everything we'd been through together.
Everything that had led to that moment.
I cared deeply for her, but I was seventeen and didn't know if what I was feeling was love or not. I had no experience of it to compare to.
I know she'd have loved for me to say it but, I didn't just want to say it to please her. I wanted to mean it when I said it. I'd tell her one day. Of that I was certain.
We'd talked about doing this. Sharing our first time, for a while now and had been waiting until we had time on our own. Bella had gotten herself put on the pill because she didn't want her first time to be sheathed in rubber. She wanted to feel it for what it was. It wasn't like there was any risk of catching something ugly, so I had no problem with it.
We'd been waiting an age to get time alone and it just wasn't happening. Sure we could have found a secluded spot out off the trail, parked up and gone for it in the back of my car but she deserved better than that. So I had started my own hunt for somewhere where we could take our time and she'd be warm and comfortable.
I'd been out walking by the river behind our house in Forks when inspiration hit me.
The old cottage.
It was a rundown shell of a building but the roof was stable and it had the privacy aspect needed and we'd be far enough out of sight of my parents.
I'd gone up there alone first and set it up with blankets and pillows which I'd snuck out from the house. Luckily I hadn't encountered any of my family for them to ask what in Christ's name I was doing hauling a huge lounger cushion over the river for.
I'd set out candles around where it was safe for them to be. I didn't want to risk knocking them over when we were...
I'd led her up there and covered her eyes as we rounded the corner into the one room.
She gasped at my handy work
"Oh Edward!" Her voice was barely more than a whisper as a single tear fell down her wonderfully soft cheek.
I wiped it away and couldn't help beaming at the fact she liked it.
Oh God, we really were going to do it.
We sat down on the large cushion on the floor that I'd covered in blankets and spent ages just looking at each other.
She drew little circles on the palm of my hand as I stroked back her hair from her face with my other.
She was beautiful.
I waited for her to make the first move. I didn't want to seem like a horny teenager that couldn't control himself and pounced on her as soon as we got there. Even though deep down I did kind of want to.
She rose to her knees and scooted over to me, straddling my lap. I encased her in my arms and kissed her gently on her nose, reveling at the sight of her eyes closing in response.
I kissed my way delicately down to her mouth and waited for her invite. She didn't hesitate to let me in.
We'd made out before, hundreds of times and gotten heated and exited but we only ever got as far as my hands under her top and dry humping, and I never had a problem with that; but this kiss was gentle yet just as powerful. This kiss was the one that would lead us to a new place in our relationship. Change it and us forever.
My hands reached up to cup her face while she laced hers through my hair and I had never felt so alive. Our mouths brushed lightly then forcefully together and our tongues joined. I held her to me as bodies pressed against bodies.
She moaned against my lips and I knew I wouldn't be able to take it much more. Leaving one hand at the back of her neck the other found its way under her hoodie and to my favorite spot. I palmed my treasure and groaned too as I felt her nipples harden under my touch. Suddenly, it was as if a fire had been lit within me and I had to keep reminding myself what this was about, but that had only partially doused my burning need to feel every inch of her. I had to take my time tonight and savor her.
She pulled back to look at me before biting her lip and reaching for my shirt buttons.
I let her take her time with them before I reached to lift off hers.
I could have died and been sitting in heaven as she sat there in front of me in a perfect white lace bra. She giggled as I couldn't help but stare with my mouth hung open like an idiot. This was more flesh of Bella's than I was used to seeing and I had to taste it. I kissed my way down her collar and settled between her breasts, letting the tip of my tongue glide over the softness. Her head fell back and more little gasps escaped her lips. They turned into moans quickly as I took one of her nipples into my mouth over the fabric covering them. I needed more so I looked back up at her with pleading eyes.
She nodded and I reached round to unhook the clasp that had been keeping our skin from touching, while leaving my mouth to her. I didn't want to seem I like I was ogling her.
She pulled me back up to her level and our lips grew nervous.
"Edward, you're shaking." Her sweet scent washed over me with her words.
"So are you. Are you cold?" My tone mirrored hers.
"No, not cold," she smiled and laid herself out on the blanket before me and unbuttoned her jeans before slipping them off.
I followed suit and removed my own before laying by her side.
Seeing her like this was beyond describable.
Our kisses turned hungry again as our hands started to roam each others' bodies. I watched for her reaction as I allowed my hand to wonder towards the hot little pair of panties she was wearing that matched the bra, which had already been discarded. She bit her lip but didn't seem to want me to stop. I placed a ginger kiss on her lips before nuzzling the side of her throat with my nose. My hand dipped into the edge of her underwear and reached for her core. I groaned at the feeling of her under my touch. She was warm and wet and so ready for this but I didn't voice any of my findings.
"Edward, please?" she gasped as I stroked her flesh.
I sighed in contentment into her neck at her sudden boldness then tentatively let my finger push into her. Her back arched up as more moans rolled from her.
"Oh God, Edward."
She felt even better on the inside. I added another finger and curved them around to try to find her secret spot.
"Uuuunnggghhhhh." Her body moved around me, writhing in pleasure and my dick began straining against the waist band of my boxers.
"Stop...stop." Her breathing was intense as she grabbed for my hand.
I immediately stilled, fearing that I'd pushed my luck and hurt her.
"What is it?" I asked in a sudden panic.
"I'm...I'm...coming!" she growled.
I grinned knowing I must have hit the right place and she was worried about my hand being where it was when her orgasm hit.
"Are you really sure you want me to stop?" I whispered, hoping to God that she wasn't. I wanted to feel her.
"No," she whimpered as she moved herself against me.
"Then I won't," I reassured her.
"But I'll...on your...Oh… God… Edwardddd."
Hell if that wasn't music to my ears.
I was buzzing at what I knew I'd just done to her and couldn't wait for more. She shakily went to grab at my boxers but I stopped her.
"Bella, I just want you." I was still shaking as she gulped hard along with me.
She nodded and I positioned myself above her and her legs fell to my sides.
I waited until she was ready before gently pushing my length into her. I couldn't stifle the groan emitting from deep in my throat at how amazing it felt. But stopped thinking about it when I saw her eyes closed and her body rigid.
"Bella!" I panicked and was just about to move away when she grabbed my arms.
"Wait!" She winced and I knew she was in pain but she wouldn't let go of me.
"I don't want to hurt you Bella...I..." I tried again to remove my body from hers but she kept on clinging to me.
"Sex Ed one 'o' one, Edward," she grimaced.
Realization sunk in and I felt a little better. But I'd still hurt her and I didn't like it.
After a moment she opened her eyes and gave me a crooked smile.
"See, it's okay now. Just go slow for a minute."
I nodded and carefully pulled back again before pushing into her once more.
We carried on at a gentle pace and she seemed to relax into it a little more and encouraged me to increase my pace. I didn't hesitate and the change was unbelievable. We carried on moving with one another and I could feel the building sensation stirring in me. I'd only ever had it on my own, in private, me being a hormonal teenager and all; but this was so much stronger.
I lost myself in the sensations coursing through me when my name started to fall from her lips on repeat. Hearing her moan my name over and over nearly made me lose it then and there but I held back. She was close, and I wanted her to get there first.
"EEEEDDDDWWAARRRRDDD! OH God Edddwwaarrddd!" Her body shook under me and I felt her muscles tighten like a vice around me; that's when I couldn't hold it any longer and erupted into her.
I had never felt so complete before.
------End flash-------
When I managed to shake myself from the painful yet delicious memory of us I looked around to find Dr. Phil had gotten himself comfy over in his fluffy pet bet in the corner.
I tried to not to think about it too much because I both cherished and loathed that particular part of my past. I cherished it because it had been Bella; I loathed it because it was the start of bad things and the end of our relationship...and our friend ship.