Violet: Loyalty, devotion

June 17th, 2016

The sound of uneven footsteps mixed with the chirping of the cicadas, setting a cautious tone to the otherwise-beautiful afternoon. This time as Lukas came walking on the cemetery path, his clothing and hair appeared disheveled and his gait was unsteady. When he reached the gravestone, he wavered in his stance for a moment before falling back heavily onto his ass.

"It's been one month since that day."

Watching the stone, Lukas felt like he needed to add more: to tell Mathias about Emil, Tino and Berwald, or how he was handling himself, or why he reeked of cheap vodka. Still, the words escaped his mouth and he was left staring in silence.

How could he ever explain his new life without him? Every morning he would open his eyes and have a few seconds of dreamy bliss before the reality of the world came crashing down around him, suffocating him and pricking tears into his eyes until he could pull himself into the bathroom and begin his daily routine. Every day his job performance worsened and every day Emil made a point of visiting him to make sure that he had remembered to eat. He'd gone through a full month of empty grief only to drink himself silly on the one day he should've visited the grave in a composed manner.

"Mathias, I miss you. I miss you so much, you idiot," he growled, childishly wiping his eyes with his fists. "And it never ends, it never stops because I still love you, god damn it, and you were always supposed to be here with me. It hurts so much to know that I'll never see your face again."

Lukas began to dig around in his pocket before dropping a squashed, torn violet in front of him. Heaving a deep sigh, he leaned forward to rest his clammy forehead against the gravestone.

"Do ya think that there are forest nymphs in these woods?"

Mathias's ten-year-old voice rang out over the noise of the snapping twigs and shifting brush under their feet, sending a nearby squirrel scurrying up into an oak tree.

"I think that if there are, you're scaring them off by talking so loudly," Lukas grumbled, ducking under a particularly low-hanging tree branch.

Mathias's eyes widened as he clamped his hands over his mouth. "Whoops," he whispered, giving his friend a sheepish smile.

Lukas rolled his eyes. "Keep looking for that ball," he commanded, eyeing the summer foliage around them for a hint of their discarded soccer ball that Mathias had managed to send flying into the woods behind their houses.

Mathias hummed in agreement and continued walking. Seconds later, a flash of deep purple caught his eye and he bounded over to a spot twenty feet away. "Hey, I found some wood violets!" he called.

Lukas sighed and began walking over to him. "Are they black and white and in the shape of a ball?"

"No..."

"Then why do you-" Lukas was caught off-guard by a large tree root jutting up under the foliage. He tripped, stumbling forward onto the forest floor.

"Luke! Are you alright?" Mathias ran over to him and helped him into a sitting position.

Lukas gritted his teeth, angrily cursing the tears that sprung to his eyes. "Yeah, I think so." He began to stretch out his body before he suddenly winced. "Damn, I twisted my left ankle."

Mathias gently pulled up Lukas's pant leg and slipped off his shoe and sock despite Lukas's cursing and hissing. The skin of his ankle was swollen in a gut-twisting way, and already great spots of purple and red were blooming around the joint.

Mathias whistled. "Nice job. You're not going to be able to walk on that for a week!" Though his tone was lighthearted, his mouth was set in a worried grimace.

Lukas huffed impatiently. "Go back to the house and get someone to help walk me home."

"I'm not just going to leave you out here! It's starting to get dark and we don't know what's in these woods..."

Lukas pinched the bridge of his nose. "Yeah, thanks for that bit of reassurance. Just run to my house, get someone to help, and come back here. It'll be easier and quicker than- OW! What do you think you're doing?!" He yelled.

The taller boy had hoisted him up into his arms, where he was left holding Lukas bridal-style. Even as Lukas squirmed in his arms, Mathias held him tightly. "I'm not leaving you alone out here!" he insisted, grunting against Lukas's struggles.

After a few seconds of desperately trying to wriggle himself free, Lukas gave up and slumped back in Mathias's arms. "Fine. Let's go."

They set off through the woods in silence. Even through Lukas's pain and his embarrassment at the situation, he couldn't help noticing how quickly it was getting dark. Listening to Mathias's steady breathing above him, he realized that he was glad that he didn't have to wait out there alone in the depths of the forest.

Lukas rested his head against Mathias's warm chest. "Thank you."

Mathias shrugged his shoulders as well as he could with Lukas in his arms and grinned down at him. "This is what I'm here for."

The sun had nearly set by the time Lukas stood up. Wiping stray tears from his cheeks, he took one last look at Mathias's grave.

"I'm sorry."

And with that, he turned and walked back towards his car.