like usual, english is not my first langage and i do not own anything

Enjoy and don't forget R&R

By the time the fated day arrived, they had planned everything. They decided not to go to the United States directly; they would switch between trains and planes. So when they were dropped in Vienna, they started immediately executing their plan, they forged many passports and IDs as well as ordering two US passports which were supposed to be delivered to them in Madrid where they would take a plan directly to the US. They took their time and were very careful and cautious, everything was running smoothly or so it appeared to them for just when they were about to cross Spain's borders they were caught by both Hydra and the Red Room agents.

« Well, Well, Well. Look what we have here, the teacher and his student or should I say his lover. What a scandalous thing. » a KGB agent said with a malicious tone. Natalia recognized him immediately, she used to see him a lot in the red room; he even gave them once a lesson in torture and information extraction through manipulation.

« Did you really think you two that we wouldn't discover your plan or the nature of your relation!? We have eyes everywhere, in every corner in Europe so it is not easy to run away from our claws. I should confess thought; we didn't discover your disappearance until the second day. We thought at first that something wrong happened for you to disappear but imagine our surprise when a Hydra's agent spotted you through camera surveillance in the train station in Orleans holding hands and looking… very… mm how should I describe it… intimate; yeah that's the word. Well; that led us to another conclusion, one of you seduced the other but whom exactly? » another sly faced Red Room agent said.

He smiled a very wicked smile than continued: « We all know that the winter soldier is Hydra's puppet, he may have stayed in the red room for too long without his brain wash sessions but he wouldn't disobey orders and act on his own just like that, after all; he's just a killing machine all his purpose is executing his master's orders, so the bet is on you little Natalia, it's you who seduced and convinced him to go against his masters and orders. I never before expected you of all the candidates to go this far after everything we have done and offered you. But we must be proud of you and of us for we trained you so well to the point that you managed to trap in your web one of our most precious weapons; a weapon that wasn't supposed to have a will or feelings. »

« No, it is not her; it's me who seduced her. I came with the idea and convinced her, she has nothing to do with all of this. If you want to blame someone; blame me, and if someone has to be punished; it is me. Let her out of all of this. » James said while holding Natalia's hand tightly.

« Who seduced who, who planned this; all of this doesn't matter now. What matter more is the result; a girl trying to betray who offered her a bright future; an opportunity to serve her country. And a puppet who is supposed to be just a weapon trying to act like a person. » Someone said from behind Hydra's agents who started to disperse while that person started walking.

James tensed upon hearing the voice; he pushed Natalia behind him and said to her in a low voice and tone punctuated by fear and anxiety.

« He is supposed to be my…˝ Master ̏ , he will use the words, so just run and don't look behind you. I love you so much, don't forget that. »

« James, please… don't » the red head said with a low and stifled voice filled with pain and eyes full of sorrow and sadness because she knows what he is asking her to do. He told her the night before that if they were ever caught, he will try to distract them by attacking in order for her to run.

The sergeant cupped her face- they already knew the nature of their relation and they were going to punish them so they didn't care for showing some kind of PDA in front of Hydra and Red Room agents- and with a look full of pain said: « Just go, please, live your life, I love you. » he then kissed her and pushed her.

Natalia didn't have the time to reply, just as he finished; the winter soldier pulled two guns and started shooting at the soldiers who didn't have the time to pull their guns and started falling on the ground like leaves on a windy autumn day.

She started to run as fast as her legs could allow. She got far away but she didn't stop, she looked behind her in hope of seeing if James was following her when suddenly she heard a loud scream; she felt like her heart stopped for a minute because that scream belonged to her soldier. It meant that they were using the trigger words in order to control him and he was trying to fight back. They both knew that they wouldn't kill him, he was so valuable to them so she kept running, she promised him that she wouldn't allow herself to be caught by either him or them and give those monsters the satisfaction of seeing her die by the hands of her lover.

After hours, she reached a small village where she checked in a small auberge. She planned to leave the next morning and continue her way to the US like it was planned in case he got caught. Unfortunately, the whole village was infested with Hydra's agents and for someone who was trained to spot enemies and danger from miles away, she got distracted; distracted by her grief; by the memories and her hope that James might have been able to defeat the influence of the trigger words, she fell asleep dreaming of waking up and finding her soldier by her side in the morning. Of them going to someplace where they would live their life and start a family.

Unfortunately, when she woke up, James wasn't by her side; but what was the most terrifying was her discovering that she was not in the inn's room but in the hellish nightmare again that she planned to escape from: the Red Room where they told her of them taking something from her which destroyed her and his effect stayed for years to come. Taking James from her was nothing compared to what they revealed; they destroyed the link that connected her with James; the fruit of their love; their baby. It appeared that she was six weeks pregnant. They didn't stop there, killing her baby as a punishment wasn't enough, they even took her ability to have children.

They told her that aborting her baby was her punishment for trying to escape with the super soldier even thought they were tempted to let her keep him and train him or her to be the best asset, after all the baby was combination of the best bioweapon and one of the best candidates to hold the Black Widow title but they changed their minds, that would have been dangerous and would have caused a lot of troubles. As for ruining her reproductive system, it was a ceremony to groom her officially as a Black Widow. The title was given to her in front of the KGB and the Red Room directors and officials after she was tortured to discipline her. They even gave her a brainwash session, but that didn't work for her for she remembered everything and their deeds only after a week, that day she cried like never before, she cried for her fate, her stolen childhood and life, for her lost love that died from the murmurs she heard in the halls, and most importantly for her baby that didn't see the day.

The red room became like a black hole with a sole purpose, sucking every beautiful thing in her life, she felt like she was in a vortex. She wanted to desperately run away but at that time she felt like coward, every time she thought of running away, the memory of James and their baby struck her like a hammer. She stayed in there for two years, she didn't have any other place to go but she didn't care; she felt like a corpse without a purpose moving only by her mind's will to live; she wanted to revenge herself, James and their baby but she knew that she couldn't do that alone. Every mission she did killed her a thousand time even thought the success of those dreadful missions made her a legend. The straw that broke the camel's back and made her decide to really run away from that god forsaken place was when she was ordered to repeat what happened to her when she was five years old, to kill a family composed of the parents and grandparents and bring the child in order to train her.

When she arrived to the intended home, she saw them; through a window; around the dining table having dinner. The child was laughing and the mother was serving dinner, they looked so happy. That scenery in front of her made her imagine what could have been her life as child or even what could have happened if she and James made it to the US and started a family. She pushed those thoughts deep in her mind for they bring nothing but grief, sorrow and reminding of lost dreams. Instead, she looked intensely at the little girl and saw herself in her, she knew; if she executed the order; what was waiting the little girl. So she looked one last time at that beautiful scenery representing not only her past but what could life has been if she had her soldier and their baby by her side. She smiled and left that night deciding to never return to that hellhole where there was only pain, sorrow, a lost life and bittersweet memories.