Hey y'all what sup my homies that are eating baloney. OMG that sounded a lot cooler in my head then it probably did on the computer. I am to lazy to erase it so I guess it will be there for a while. Sorry about not updating in a while so I hope this chapter makes up for it.

Disclaimer: I own nothing but this Kleenex in my hand. I do not own the brand Kleenex either. Sad day.

Chapter 4

Tobias

After Tris makes us sing that song we are egged by everyone in the pit. "What the hell? Where did they get all these eggs?" Zeke says. Then he gets hit in the face with a tomato. "Really a tomato?" After he says that a few more come at him. "What the hell? I love you too Mom." I look up and see his mother with a giant smirk on her face and more tomatoes in her hand.

"That's for being my son." She says and throws more at him and Uriah. "Why can't you be a good boy like Uri, he is sweet and has a girl friend that actually likes him. I want grandkids." She walks up to Uriah and pinches his cheek. "Such a good boy." Uriah blushes.

"You'll get your grandkids when you get your grandkids ma." He reminds me of Howard off of The Big Bang Theory.

I laugh and look around the pit. Its in total chaos. I see Tris laughing her ass off in a corner and Shauna and Christina along with Marlene are at the next bar over drinking and laughing their ass's off. I decide to go home unnoticed. The song that has the phrase Secret Agent Man replaying over and over in my head. Then when I go to grab Tris I pass by a mirror and see myself and the song Sexy and I Know It plays. Ha great timing because I'm Sexy and I know it. I think they played it just for me. How sweet.

Jinx. I would only think it was sweet if I was an Amity or a guy named Uriah. Ha I make myself laugh.

Zeke texts me say that we're going to have to keep playing tomorrow. Tomorrow will be fun because it will be Make Fun of Factions Day... day!

Tris

What the hell? Is the first thing that comes to my mind when I wake up in Tobias's bed... next to him. I don't even remember coming home, which is kind of sketchy. My head is pounding and I have a huge migraine. I don't even remember having anything to drink. At least I think I didn't have anything. I look over a Tobias who is still sound asleep. Huh... I woke up before him actually. What is the world turning into?

A knock on the door wakes Tobias from his slumber. "Tris go get it." He mumbles.

"Not my apartment." I snap back and kick him in the hip causing him to fall off the bed face first. He growls and I smile.

The truth is I would have actually gotten up and got the door, but I'm too lazy and the bed is warm and the air is cold. Right now life sucks for him.

"Thanks man this will come in handy." Tobias says. I wonder who is at the door. I would look up but again I'm too lazy. Tobias shuts the door and hops on the bed with clothes in his hand jostling the mattress.

"Who the hell comes at... 6 in the morning." I ask.

"Um... the people that hand out clothes for Make Fun of Factions Day and its not 6 in the morning its 12 in the afternoon." Hm... I knew I could sleep in late but not this late. Wait what's Make Fun of Factions Day?

"What's Make Fun of Factions Day?" I ask sweetly.

"Its more of a week thing where everyone in the whole entire compound makes fun of each faction, except ours, for a day... and it looks like today is Candor." He says and I grab the clothes from him. "These are mine yours are probably at your apartment."

"I want the hat. I think its cool." Its a flat-billed hat with the word 'sarcasm' in capital letters in black print.

"Fine, but if you don't have a hat to replace it then I get it back."

"Sounds like a plan Stan."

"My name isn't Stan."

"No hotdoggin way." (AN: Did any of that sound familiar to anyone? Maybe NickelCrusta14's story Faction Five High. Y'all should read it if you haven't its hilarious.)

"Really your trying to bring that back? Newsflash you and Uriah will never bring pansycake or hotdoggin back." He says and I scowl at him.

"I gots to go." I say in bad grammar because I know it pisses him off.

"You mean 'I got to go.'"

"No I mean I gots to go. I ain't an Erudite." I shout as I walk out the door.

"Your results would beg to differ." Is the last thing I hear before I run to the elevator so I could go to my apartment that I share with Christina.

Our apartment is messier than... something that is really messy. Give me a break for not finding a word to go with it because I'm hung-over right now.

"Holy Shit." I mutter under my breath. As I shuffle throw. I stop as I hear noises. As I turn the corner I see Christina and Will doing it. "HOLY MOTHER OF FUCKING DAUNTLESS CAKE ALMIGHTY!" I shout and run out. While grabbing my clothes that are by the door.

When I get to Tobias's apartment he looks a me like I grown two heads. "What?" I ask horrified.

"Nothing. What's wrong?"

"Um... I saw Chr..." I say while mumbling the last part.

"What?"

"I saw Christina and Will doing it when I went to go get my clothes." He burst out laughing.

"They took away my innocence."

"I thought I already did that." Tobias says.

"The innocence of my eyes. Besides its different... when your watching two people do 'it' its different."

"Okay, I bet it is. So to make you feel better how about we change the subject."

"Gladly."

"Do you have a hat?"

"Yeah, it says... Smart Ass."

"Not as cool as sarcasm, but it'll do."

He leaves to change into his clothes which are black and white. The white makes his dark eyes look brighter. He is wearing a white V-neck and black leather pants and black and white Addias shoes with wings on them. Holy shit they're are mother fucking awesome.

I am wearing white skinny jeans with a black and white stripped shirt and sparkly black Uggs. "Really black leather pants?" I ask. I thought I see in something other than black jeans.

"What I wanted to try something new."

"Okay that's nice."

"Come on we have a game of truth or dare to finish." he says dragging me out of the apartment.

"Okay guys we have a game to finish." Zeke says as we are all getting into our positions that we were in earlier. "That's right strip for me baby!" he shouts at Shauna. She was taking off her shirt. She shoots him a glare.

"Will you guys start deciding a dare for one of us because we can't all wait for the grass to grow." Marlene says. The guys groan and get up.

After about 10 minutes Shauna says "Will you guys finish your tea party session some other time because I want to get on with this game."

"Calm your tits." Zeke says. Shauna throws a pillow at him. "Ow, just a figure of speech babe."

"Just get on with it." I say. I glance across the circle at Christina. I still can't look her or Will in the eyes.

Just when they were about to tell us someone burst throw the door.

That's the end of this chapter so if you didn't like it fuck science. The next day they will be dressed so they make fun of the Amity. Enjoy life , eat cake, do not fall down the stairs, be good don't be bad, do not play with knives unless your dauntless. Bye darlings.