Warnings: angst, language, psychological distress (see first part for warnings covering the whole story)
Part 3 – Acquaintance
The rest of that night was not fun, to say the least. Unable to escape the thoughts racing through my mind, I knew sleep would only bring more nightmares that I could not handle. I tried to occupy myself by taking apart Deathscythe's cockpit. I undid all the wiring and redid it twice, but the activity did little to relieve my racing thoughts. Incoherent strings of memories were combining with figments of my imagination, and I couldn't even follow what was going on in my own head. Truth to tell, Heero's appearance had scared me badly... really badly. Never before had my night terrors been intruded upon, and I completely lost control of my thoughts.
It was almost worse than dreaming. No, it was worse than dreaming. I could wake up from nightmares, but I could not drive these thoughts from my mind. I worked mechanically, hardly even seeing the wires I was rerouting as I relived the dream I had had that night, Sister Helen's last moments, running in the alleys from the soldiers, Solo dying, coming back to find the church in ruins. I saw Heero pointing his gun, but he was pointing it at me, not that girl. I saw him standing in my doorway, looking at me with that expression that I didn't understand. All of the memories played and replayed in my mind, overlapping and fusing together until I was sobbing as I finally put all the controls back in place.
I jumped down from the cockpit and began to run. I ran all the way to the back of the warehouse and frantically punched in the code to the back door. Slamming it behind me, I ran down the street as fast as I could. The memories would not leave me alone, but I had to escape, somehow. I ran and ran until I thought my lungs would burst, then ran some more. Finally, I slowed to a walk as the street dead-ended. Ahead of me was a dock over dark water, the ocean stretching endlessly beyond. I fell to my knees at the end of it and realized I was still crying. The memories kept on coming. Curling up in a ball, I gave up. The crashing surf receded to a faint murmur as I let the images in my mind take over, tears running down my face all the while.
It was dawn when I finally came back to myself. My limbs and back ached from lying curled up on the hard wood of the dock. I groaned as I got up, wondering if I had fallen asleep. There was no way to tell. I looked out over the grey waters for a while, focusing on the sound of the crashing waves, grateful that my mind was now mercifully blank. I don't know how long I stood there, but by the time I turned to walk back to the warehouse, the sun had crested the grey buildings before me. I walked slowly, mentally preparing myself to confront Heero and the Sweepers. The guys at least would be up by now, if not Heero, and would certainly be wondering at my absence.
Entering the back door, I grinned and headed over to the makeshift kitchen we'd set up towards the front of the warehouse, which consisted of a large fridge, sink, and two propane camp stoves. The stoves were on and the smell of eggs and sausage wafted over me as I approached the men seated around the tables near the stoves.
"Mornin' everyone!" I called, widening my grin. "Good to see you all up on this fine day!" All eyes turned to me, and not a few eyebrows drew up in surprise.
"Since when were you a morning person, Duo?" Howard demanded as he stood up. "And where the Hell were you?! When I got up, the door to your room was open and we couldn't find you anywhere."
"Sorry to worry you guys. I woke up early and decided to go for a run instead of lazing around in bed. Didn't think to tip anyone off about where I was going." Sitting down in an empty chair, I saw Heero gazing at me from down the table with one of those inscrutable expressions of his.
Grinning ever wider, I ignored the perplexed looks I was still receiving from the others and leaned toward the other pilot. "So Heero, Howard's snoring keep you up last night? I slept like a baby, if you know what I mean," I said with a wink. No baby I ever knew made it through the night without screaming and crying at least once, so I thought it was a pretty accurate statement.
Heero gave me a strange look as Howard cried out in protest. "I'm not the only one who snores, Duo! You know Tom's way worse than me. Why do you always put the blame on my shoulders, huh?"
I kept a watch on Heero through the corner of my eye as I replied, "Come on, How, everyone knows you snore louder than a freight train, and Tom doesn't even come close. It's a wonder any one of the guys manages to sleep with you around!" A number of the men laughed at that, and Howard threw up his hands before grumbling off to start his work.
Turning back to Heero, I continued, "Sorry about all the noise you had to put up with, but like I said, that room's the only one we've got. You'll get used to it eventually." He continued to watch me with that strange look for a few heartbeats, then shrugged and turned back to his breakfast.
"It wasn't a problem. I'm trained to be able to rest in uncomfortable surroundings as well as noisy ones."
"Alright," I laughed. "Fair enough." Getting up, I walked over to the stoves and loaded a plate with eggs and sausage, then filled a glass with water from the sink before returning to my seat. Relieved that Heero wasn't going to bring up what had happened the night before, I took a bite of sausage and chased it down with a gulp of water.
"So you manage to get much done last night?" I asked. "You were up pretty late."
"I just catalogued all of the damages and made a list of the parts I'll need. I'll start the repairs once Howard tells me which parts you have on hand." Taking a last bite of eggs, Heero stood up and took his dishes over to the sink, where the guy on dish duty took them and added them to the dirty pile he was working on. Turning, Heero started over towards his gundam. I took a few bites and then grabbed my plate to take with as I stood up to follow. Despite the events of the previous night, I was still intrigued by the other pilot. I opened my mouth to ask another question when Howard called from across the room.
"Hey, Heero!" Howard waved as he jogged over to us. "As I thought, we've got most of the stuff you need. I marked off the items that we don't. Judging by how long it took to get them last time we needed 'em for Deathscythe, we should have 'em in four or five days."
"Thank you," Heero replied, scanning over the list Howard had handed to him. Nodding to himself, he resumed walking toward his gundam.
"No problem!" Howard said, giving me a sidelong glance as we watched the other pilot go. "Sure is a quite one, isn't he?"
"Certainly seems so," I replied. Taking another bite of breakfast, I continued, "Anyway, thanks for helping him out. I'm gonna help him find all the parts and see if I can't get a better look at his gundam." Shoveling the last few bites of food in my mouth, I held the plate and fork out to Howard. "Wanna take my dishes back for me?" I asked with my most winning smile.
Rolling his eyes, Howard took them from me and snorted. "I don't know why I put up with you, sometimes."
"Ahh, you know it's cause I'm adorable! You haven't been able to say no to me since you found me starving and nearly unconscious in that crate three years ago," I said with a grin.
That just earned me another eye-roll and a harumph. "More like abominable," he muttered as he headed for the kitchen, not quite suppressing an affectionate smile.
Laughing, I headed over to where Heero was. He'd set up a laptop on a table at the foot of his gundam, and was leaning over it as he entered in some data, glancing over at his list from time to time. Leaning over his shoulder, I queried, "That's a nifty-looking program you've got there. What's it do?"
I could tell it was a diagnostics program for his gundam, into which he was entering the parts he had available to work with so it could give him suggestions on what order to repair things and such. However, I figured I'd take a shot at getting him to talk by feigning ignorance.
He glanced up at me, and it was clear he doubted that I didn't know the answer to my own question, so I quickly assumed the most innocent expression I could.
"Well?" I asked, rocking back on my heels.
Looking back at his computer, he replied, "It's a diagnostics program for my suit. Once I enter in the available parts, it will tell me which repairs can be performed and which ones will have to wait until the other parts arrive."
"I figured as much," I said, smiling. "Just thought I'd make sure, you know? The one I use looks a bit different." Smiling wider when he snorted at my reply, I continued. "Well, anyway, I'm not busy today so I figured I could help you out." Raising my hands when he was about to protest, I laughed. "I know, I know, you want to do the repairs yourself. That's fine. But, you don't know where we keep any of our parts, so you'll need me to show you around. After that, well, I'll just keep you company. Work's always more fun when someone else is around, right?"
I could tell from the look he gave me that he didn't agree with my last statement, but all he said was, "We'll get the parts when I finish entering this data."
"Sounds good to me!" I replied with a grin and hopped up to sit on the end of the table while he went back to work. Swinging my legs, I leaned back and hummed to myself as I looked idly around the warehouse, watching the other pilot out of the corner of my eye. As usual, it was hard to tell what he was thinking. Unlike the last time I had bothered him at his work, though, he didn't seem annoyed… just passive. Mostly just intent on his work. I was willing to bet he'd be sick of me by the end of the day, but at least we'd be starting out with minimal hostilities.
Hitting the enter key one last time, Heero stood and looked up at me expectantly. Taking this as my cue, I hopped down and gestured for him to follow. "We'll be able to get most of the parts you need just in the back of this main room, but we'll probably have to dig in the storage rooms for a few. Let me see the list?" I requested. He handed it to me without a word and I scanned it quickly. "Yep! Just as I thought." Arriving at the back of the room, I grabbed a large cart and pushed it over to a pile of crates and parts.
"Alright, this is where we're gonna find all the electronic bits. We can load everything on this cart, then wheel it back to your suit once it's full." Nodding, Heero set about sifting through the piles. Joining him, I smiled to myself. He may not be talking much more, but he certainly seemed more tolerable of my presence than he was at the docks or on the drive the night before. If I didn't know any better, I'd say he was even glad for my company.
We filled up the cart and wheeled it on over before going back for the last few parts, which were buried in one of the storage rooms as I had predicted. As we were sorting through the crates, Heero surprised me with a question.
"Don't you have work to do on Deathscythe?"
Looking up, I found Heero gazing at me intently.
"He speaks!" I said with a laugh. "Nah, Deathscythe's fine. I finished fixing him up yesterday before going after your gundam. See, repairs go quickly when you let people help you." Looking back over, I saw that he had returned his attention to the crate he was currently sifting through. "Why do you ask?" I queried.
He was quiet so long I didn't think he would answer. Peeping at him from under my bangs, I saw an almost pained look on his face. I opened my mouth to change the subject, but he spoke before I had the chance.
"I don't want to distract you from your duties." Pause. "I can finish this on my own. You don't have to help."
Understanding dawning on me, I bit back a laugh. Who would've thought he'd feel guilty for taking up my time?
"It's no problem, man, really. Deathscythe's all taken care of, as I said earlier, and I'm not busy today. It happens sometimes when you've got a team backing you up," I added at his skeptical glance. "Besides, it makes sense to get to know each other a bit. We're on the same side, right? Chances are we'll be working together at some point, and understanding each other will certainly make that easier. Don't worry that I'm neglecting my duties, 'cause I'm not. If anything, my duty is to be doing exactly what I'm doing."
I looked up to smile at him, and I could see the tension leave him. Well, most of it, anyway.
"Alright," he said, nodding, then turned back to his work. I wondered again at whoever had provided his training. Clearly, interpersonal skills and teamwork had not been included.
As we wheeled the last cartfull back towards his gundam, I noticed a blinking light at the corner of his laptop's screen. He did too, as evidenced when he left the cart to jog over to the computer and began typing away. Pushing the cart the last few yards, I walked up behind him.
"What's that all about, huh?"
He looked up at me briefly before replying. "Mission."
"Mission? Huh, I never get more than 24 hours notice for mine. Lucky you, you'll have a whole week to prepare."
Looking at me somewhat askance before turning back to the screen, he replied, "I never get more than 24 hours notice either. The mission is tomorrow."
"What?! But you won't have all the parts you need for at least four days, let alone the time to finish the repairs you can do now! You've got to be kidding me!"
Closing his laptop, he shook his head firmly. "I will get as much done as I can before I leave, but the mission can't wait. Orders are orders." With that, he walked over to one of the carts, grabbed a few parts and some tools, then headed toward his suit.
"Wait just a minute, Heero," I said, silently fuming at whatever callous bastard was giving him orders. He turned, looking at me curiously. "It's bad enough that you'll be going into this mission with a damaged suit, which I'm sure you know is dangerous as hell, but there's no way you'll be able to finish all the repairs by yourself before you leave, even with the parts we have. Now, I understand not wanting the guys to work on your suit, or even me, but you're gonna have to accept my help on this one." At the stubborn look on his face, I held up a hand and glared, forestalling any protest. "I'm a gundam pilot, too, dammit. I know what the Hell I'm doing. I'm not about to let my only ally go out there in a defective machine!"
His eyes opened wide in shock at my tirade. Angry with myself for letting my emotions get the best of me, I stalked over to the pile of parts and grabbed the ones that were needed for the gundam's shoulder joints. Heading over to begin my work, I silently dared the other pilot to try and stop me. After a brief silence, I heard him climbing over into the cockpit with his own supplies, not saying a word.
Sighing to myself, I tried to focus on the work I was doing, but thoughts kept intruding on the silence. What had gotten into me to yell at him like that? Sure, everything I'd said was true, but it wasn't like me to let myself get so worked up. Though… he really was my only ally. Over the last twenty-four hours, I'd gone from being a lone fighter to having a partner in this mad rebellion, someone who was so different from me and yet seemed to much the same.
When I finally realized what had happened, I began to laugh. It was that or start crying. Here I was, helping him fix his suit because I didn't want to lose him over some stupid malfunction, when I'd already put him in more danger than any enemy could. After three years of locking my heart away, I had begun to care again. Laughing bitterly, I ignored the hot tear that escaped to trickle down one cheek as I set my focus back to my work. I would have to be more careful in the future. No one deserved the consequences of my affection.
tbc
Okay, here is the part where I start to beg. I would really really really like to know what everyone thinks, whether you like it or hate it or simply have to point out some stupid mistake I made. So please, please leave a review. You'll make my day! Anyway, thanks for reading, can't wait to hear from you ;)
NoirAnge