Author's note: Yeah, much slower then I thought…I'm struggling with the grief part, mostly cuz I never lost someone close to me to unnatural causes. So it was basically always a relief when they passed, so they stop suffering. So please, give me advice and I'll do my best!

I'd also like to thank everyone who's added me to their author's alert and reviewed! Thank you so much for your support 3

I don't own any official characters but I do own what I do with them, so back off with love! :heart:

Chapter 4 Finding You

After the confrontation with Sango, Kagome slowly began to build herself up again. It wasn't who she was before, but it wasn't the broken person she had been recently either. Her stubbornness had flared its head, determined to work her way though and to live. 'I cannot live beside Inuyasha anymore, but I can live for the both of us,' she thought fiercely.

So when Shippou told her stories or would show her his drawings, she'd clap her hands and ask him questions, watching as his chest puffed up with pride. It brought a small smile to her face, something she hadn't felt like doing in weeks.

When Sango asked her to join her for a bath in the hot springs, Kagome would agree and gather up her supplies, always petting the faithful yellow pack before leaving her room. They would then have light conversation, usually about Miroku or Shippou. Sango did her best to steer the conversation away from Inuyasha or the village they were to return to, or even about her own wedding. She did not want to pressure Kagome with these facts by putting them in her face. Kagome took each topic in stride, allowing herself to remember something of the past before clenching her jaw and pushing them back in her mind. It was good and healthy to remember, but not to be lost in memories.

During their last hot spring bath together before they would leave to travel home, Kagome casually brought up the topic of Sango's wedding.

"Do you already know what kind of flowers you want? What about your kimono? Uchikake or Shiromuku? Have you talked to Miroku about getting him out of his monk clothes and into Montsuki?" Kagome fired question after question. Okay, so maybe she hadn't asked as casually as she had liked to, but she felt excited over her sister's wedding and she wanted to be a part of it all.

Sitting a bit stunned, the taijiya looked over her bathing partner's face. Just a few weeks ago Kagome's eye had been a flat shade of blue with no spark to them, with heavy dark bags under her eyes. Her full heart-shaped face had been gaunt and stressed. Right now though, Kagome's blue eyes had a small coal of light in them, and the bags had grown less heavy beneath them. She still looked stressed, but the gauntness to her face had faded into the full health she once held. 'It seems she's starting to actually accept what happened. Go Kagome, your road will be hard and it will last the rest of your life, but you will find happiness again along the way,' Sango thought, a grin flashing.

"He's arguing that his monk attire is formal enough. Yeah, like I'm going to let him get away with that!" Sango told her, her earth toned eyes sparkling with laughter.

"No way! He needs to be in Montsuki! Complete with haori and hakama; he'd look very handsome, and formal!" Kagome gushed back, the coals of light in her eyes sparkling just a bit brighter. "What about you Sango? Have you decided on what you want to wear? It's your wedding after all!" Kagome asked using the towel she had brought with her to pat dry her olive toned skin.

Following Kagome's example of drying her self off, Sango quickly moved to put her yukata on. Tying the sash that held it together, she turned as Kagome finished the last button of her pajama's top. The strange sleeping kimono had always amused her, with little neko paw prints on them. "I'm not sure, honestly. I guess traditionally I should be wearing a Shiromuku, since Miroku isn't a taijiya and I don't have any holy powers or training. Besides, Shiromuku is really beautiful! Although the Uchikake is really colorful and has a lot of meaning behind it, and it would mean I could honor my fallen clan…" she trailed off from speaking, biting her lip at her careless words. 'I let the excitement get to my head.'

Turning around sharply, Kagome started down the path that lead back to the village. She knew everyone had been tip toeing around her about such things, and even though she had been the one to approach the subject, it still left twinges of pain in her heart. Giving her self a moment to breath, they silently walked back to their host village. Midway down the path, she relaxed enough to feel guilty about how the conversation ended. 'Sango is trying, and this is important,' she thought with a touch of anger at herself.

"Do you want my opinion?" She asked suddenly. Kagome kept her eyes forward on the path, ignoring Sango's turn of head at her voice.

"I would like it, yes," Sango responded, turning her head back to the path, mirroring the miko's body. Releasing her breath slowly, Kagome gave her answer.

"I think you should do Shiromuku; it's not just about getting a blank slate to take on your husband's traditions, but to create your own traditions together. Uchikake would be great to honor them, but if they were still alive, they would want you to look to the future, not the past," Kagome's voice stayed firm, even when at the end, her words were just as much to convince herself as to convince Sango.

Reaching the house they were staying at, Sango turned to her friend and sister at their fusuma doors. She once again observed her friend's face, seeing the dark bag's under her eyes, the stress present on her face. But this time, it was the firm line of her lips and the brighter quality of her eyes that had Sango taking her hand and squeezing it.

"Thank you, Kagome."

xxxxx-xxxxx

"I've known Yusuke since we were children. We dated for a long time," Keiko told the woman, her upbeat reply hiding the slight smirk that came to her face. 'Kind of insecure aren't you?' she thought smugly.

"Oh, I see! We'll its nice to meet such an old friend of his. Though I must say Yusuke hasn't mentioned you much at all. You two must not be close anymore," Kagome fired back, a pleasant smile still on her face.

'Bitch.' Both women thought about the other.

"We're not, this is the first time we've seen each other or talked since that time," Yusuke pitched in, aware of how his ex and current girlfriend were eying each other up. He and Kagome had only become more serious about dating recently, and though they had built up a strong amount of trust quickly, he wasn't willing to give it any chances. 'Better to end this now, I've been waiting all week for this date!'

With a casualness that had Keiko's eyes narrowing at the intimate act, Yusuke moved to wrap an arm around Kagome's waist. "Well, I guess we'll be going now! Sorry about your late date, Keiko. See ya around!" Yusuke said cheerfully, and with that he jumped with his date down onto the side walk. Keiko huffed, her fists clenched and her body rigid.

"Ohhh, Yusuke!" she yelled out, but there was no reply.

On the other side of the wall, the couple landed safely among the street walkers. Keeping his arm around his date's waist and his hand on the lovely curve of her hip, Yusuke started to guide Kagome down the street.

"So that was Keiko, huh?" She said, her own arm coming up around his back. To all that saw them, they were drawn in by the beauty of the two people holding each other as they walked around downtown Tokyo, an aura of peace mixing with that of intimidation.

"Yeah, that's her. She was acting kind of weird though. I don't really remember her being so snobbish or rude. Her parents own a shop, so she's usually very well mannered," he told her, his thumb brushing up and down her side. When he had been dating Keiko, it was rare for her to let him hold her even in such as a way as this. Public displays of affection were, surprisingly, something he enjoyed but Keiko had not. Maybe it was the demon blood now active his body but he loved having his hands on his woman, public or private, touching her in any way he could. Or maybe he was just a pervert who liked to feel the touch of his woman whenever he saw her.

"Well, let's leave her and all of that behind! What are we doing for our date today? It's still warm out, but fall weather will be coming soon," Kagome said, cheerfully leaning into her boyfriend. They both were outdoors type of people, which worked out well all around. When their schedules and the weather allowed them, they preferred to go out of the city to more forested areas for hikes or to explore. Yusuke had once told her about a large shrine just outside the East boarder of Tokyo but he had yet to take her there.

"It's an important place to me, I'm not sure yet if I want to share," he told her, his warm eyes asking her to understand.

Which she did, how could she not? She had her own secrets, her own important places she was not yet willing to share with him.

"That's true! Actually, I heard about something that might interest you. You know that court yard that's over there," he gestured off to their left, "between the two glass buildings? Apparently they get a lot of street performers there; musicians, dancers, artists, you know. It seems to be right up your alley, and they never get the cops called on them, so I figure they must be pretty good." Yusuke told her, a confident smirk on his face.

He was aware of how important dance was to the woman at his side, as well as how much she enjoyed seeing and trying out different styles.

"I want to see it all, try it all! I want to be able to dance in way that is just me, just Kagome! I want to express who I am and never be mistaken for someone else!" she had yelled at him passionately, tears making glittering rivers down her pale cheeks. He had been stunned by the beauty of her sorrow and determination. Silently, they watched each other in the little patch of forest.

"Alright then, I'll be there to see it. I want to see your 'Kagome' Dance," he told her, his deep eyes never leaving hers.

'That was back when we first met. Man, it feels like a long time, but it's only been 3 months!' Yusuke thought, glancing down at Kagome. She was glowing, looking up at him with a happy expression with her vivid blue eyes sparkling at him. It was something he had learned quickly, to judge how Kagome really felt, look into her eyes. They betrayed her happy face every time, or sweet tone every time when she was sad or angry. But right now, they sparkled up at him in happiness, and he returned the look to her in full force.

It always amazed Kagome how much he surprised her. When they had first met, she had expected him to be rude and thoughtless, someone who wouldn't care what was important to you, let alone to cater to those feelings. He had surprised her again and again though, with how gentle he really was, how much he heard despite his lofty attitude. He was laid back and he made her feel relaxed as well. 'And safe, Yusuke has always made me feel safe, even though we fought when we first met.' Kagome mused.

She had been in the woods that she frequently spent time in, practicing her dance. The woods were connected to the shrine so she didn't expect anyone else to be there and so hadn't bothered to pay attention. All her focus had been on her body, the story of the movements, the emotions of the song that she was to perform to. She still couldn't figure out how he had gotten past her miko senses, it was like he wasn't there and then suddenly he was, and of course they had bumped into one another. He accused her of being clumsy; she assured him that he was the one at fault.

"What are you doing here anyways? This is private shine property you know!" she yelled at him, wiping the sweat from her forehead. Although the man in front of her was attractive, he was trespassing and she couldn't just brush that off. 'As the shrine's active Miko, it's my duty to take care of this!' she thought as she eyed him over.

He was tall at 5'10", most of that height lying in his jean-clad legs, with a lean frame of wired muscles. His sleeveless white shirt allowed her to see the corded muscles in his arms and how the veins popped against his tanned skin. His broad shoulders were stiff with anger and his faintly stubbled jaw was clenched.

She noted that his hair was a similar dark black as her own, so dark that it seem to have a hue of green to it as opposed to her blue hue, and long. 'He's probably a delinquent. Great, just what I need to deal with, some hot punk,' she thought, eying him up and down.

When she met his honey brown eyes, he smirked at her. He knew that she had been checking him out, not that he cared much, because he had been returning the favor. The woman before him might have been irritating but she had other qualities to be appealing. Such as her petite body that would barely brush against his chin if he were to embrace her, or her sizable breasts that were heaving gently against a tight navy shirt as she breathed deeply from both anger and her dance. He had been watching her for a bit before she had bumped into him.

He'd been walking back from a mission, but when he had passed this part of the woods he had felt a pulse of energy coming from within, so he had gone to investigate and came upon her dancing. She had been mesmerizing, her body finely controlled as she moved, twirling and jumping, arms and legs lifting and falling in a dance that made his heart clench oddly. He had moved forward and before he knew it, she had bumped into him. 'So maybe it's my fault, but I'm not going to admit it!'

"Chill out, a shrine is meant for the public anyways right? Maybe I was just passing though to go pay my respects," he taunted her, smirking at her skeptical look.

"Besides, you're here too, that means your trespassing right along with me!" he laughed out.

"I'm this shine's miko, I live here. So try again, buddy," Kagome said, smirking as she crossed her arms.

"Well damn, I guess I'm caught. Do you mind taking me to the shine anyways? I might get lost and stick around longer!" he replied carelessly, his smirk widening. He always did like a girl with sass. 'Okay, so he's a cute punk too,' Kagome thought as she laughed a bit and turned to lead their trespassing guest to the shrine.

"What's your name?" she asked, glancing at him over her shoulder.

"The name's Yusuke, Urameshi Yusuke. You?" he asked his hands behind his head.

"Kagome," she answered, and as they broke though the lining of the trees and stepped into the court yard, she spread out an arm in welcome, "Welcome to the Higarashi Shrine!"

Coming back from the memory of their first meeting, Kagome squeezed his side affectionately and beaming her smile at him said, "That sounds wonderful, Yusuke!"

Author's Note: I decided I needed to bring it back to the future a bit. But I still have lots to write about Kagome's past, like how she got into dance, and why they are so much older then 15. Just in case you guys are confused, they'd be about 20, adult age in Japan. For this story, Kagome is about 18 when she goes back to the future from the past for the last time. Kagome is also older then Yusuke :D but only a little bit.

Glossary and Explanation

Holding each other's waist - This deserves mentioning because in Japan, you would never see this even today. Holding hands is acceptable, but holding each others' waist and French kissing are not something you'd see in public, like, ever. Close mouth kisses and hand holding are proper Japanese dating customs, but since I'm American, I decided to mix it up. As you can see, Keiko is more traditional in this sense.

Uchikake - is a full-length outer robe. Until the Edo period, it was worn by women of Samurai, warrior, or noble families on special occasions. Since then, it has become a part of Japanese traditional bridal costume. It usually had a design with symbols of significance to the bride, thus how Sango could honor her fallen clan by having one that symbolizes them.

Shiromuku - Is the traditional wedding kimono. Everything is white, even the accessories; "white" has been regarded by Japanese people as a symbol of pureness, cleanness or virginity. The symbolism also means that the bride is ready to take on her husband's traditions and give up her own.

Montsuki - A very formal black kimono with one, three, or five family crests on the back, chest, and shoulders, with white tabi (divided-toe socks), white naga-juban (under-kimono) and various types of footwear. In cooler weather, a montsuki haori with a white haori-himo (haori-fastener) completes the outfit.

Haori - A long outer jacket

Hakama - Deep pleated pants worn with kimono and haori

Yukata - a light kimono typically worn after bathing

Taijiya - exterminator or slayer

Neko - cat