Nobody's Child
(Chapter Four: Paternity Leave)
Elliot filled up his coffee mug as he yawned. Across the room Allie slept peacefully in her carrier.
"How's it going, man?" Fin asked.
"It's good. It's great. We're great," Elliot assured him.
"She keeps you up all night, doesn't she?"
"No, she sleeps all through the night," Elliot lied.
"Really? Then why are you so tired that you haven't noticed you are pouring coffee all over the floor?" Fin asked pointing to the stream of black liquid overflowing the cup, running across the counter and pooling in the floor between his feet.
"Shit!"
Fin shook his head as Elliot grabbed some paper towels and began to clean up the mess he had made.
"Look at her," Elliot said looking back at his infant daughter as she slept, "she is sound asleep now. But she doesn't sleep at night. At all!"
"Babies are like that," Fin said.
"She cries and she cries and she screams and cries some more. I have no idea what to do. I am so afraid that I have made a huge mistake and I am just going to screw her up."
"Relax. All new parents feel that way in the beginning. You'll get the hang of it."
"I think I'm gonna go crazy! She keeps me up all night, then she sleeps all day. When I finally get a moment to sit down she needs fed or changed or burped. And lately she throws up."
"Babies spit up, Elliot. That is normal."
"Not spit up. I mean like projectile vomit. It is really disgusting."
"Did you call the doctor?"
"I don't have a doctor."
"You haven't found a pediatrician?"
"It's on my to do list. Right next to finding a daycare that will take a five week old."
"No luck, huh?"
"Oh Fin, the ones that will are in bad neighborhoods or look rundown and are badly understaffed."
"You have to find someone. You can't keep bringing her to work like this."
Allie opened her little eyes and began to cry.
"Daddy's coming sweetheart," Elliot said rushing to her side.
Fin watched as he pick up the little girl and checked her diaper. Elliot pulled a bottle and the can of formula from the pink diaper bag. He heated some water in the microwave and mixed the baby up a bottle.
"Looks like you're getting the hang of it."
"Alright kiddo," Elliot said offering Allie the bottle, "daddy has got to get some work done."
He sat down at his desk and sat Allie in her carrier. Elliot held her bottle in one hand and attempted to type up his reports with the other.
"Oh, Allie's here," Olivia cooed as she walked into the bullpen.
"Yeah, Allie is here," Elliot remarked.
"How is she doing?"
"She is good. But daddy is going insane."
Olivia laughed.
"It can't be that bad, El."
"She only sleeps when I have to be awake. She throws up everywhere and she cries all night. I don't know what to do. I have only been a father for a couple of days and I am already falling so far behind on work I don't know if I'll ever get caught up."
"What about a paternity leave?"
Elliot looked confused.
"It's a leave of absence for when a man becomes a new father. To help him adapt to being a parent before he returns to work. Maybe you and Allie could use a little time together to work out some sort of schedule. I'm sure Cragen wouldn't mind and we can cover things around here."
"I guess I could use a few days to get some things settled."
"It's usually a few weeks."
"Maybe I should talk to him," Elliot said as Allie opened her little blue eyes to stare up at him.
"Why don't I take her for a little while and give you a chance to talk to him?"
"That sounds like a plan," he said handing her the baby.
"Hi there angel," Olivia cooed as she looked down at Allie. "How's my girl?"
Allie grunted and stared up at her.
"I know exactly how you feel. I have had a few of those days myself lately. It's tough being a girl, isn't it?"
"She doesn't understand you," Munch said looking down at Allie.
"Yes she does," Olivia argued.
"She is five weeks old. The only things she understands are eat, sleep and poop."
Olivia laughed.
"Maybe most babies don't understand, but we have a connection. Don't we Allie?"
"She likes you," he said.
"Of course she does. Everybody likes me. Well, everybody who isn't a rapist, murder or child molester, anyway."
Elliot leaned against the wall in Cragen's office.
"I wanted to talk to you about this paternity leave thing," he said watching his boss for a reaction.
"Sound like something you're interested in?"
"I think I could use a little time off with the baby, You know, to get things settled. I've got to find a doctor for her and pick out a daycare. I still don't completely have her nursery set up and I need time to figure out this parenting stuff."
"Four weeks sound okay to you?"
"Four….yes. Four weeks should be good."
"Elliot, relax. You will figure it out. Take some time off and get to know your baby. Congratulations, by the way. She's beautiful."
"Thanks, Cap."
Elliot walked back out to the bull pen to see Olivia sitting at her desk reading to little Allie.
"Another reason men put off commitment is how much it throws us when a relationship fails," she read as Allie focused her little blue eyes on Olivia's face.
"You are reading to my daughter from Cosmopolitan?"
Olivia smiled a guilty smile and laughed nervously.
"She likes it," she said staring into his eyes. "And I skipped over the article on sixty five ways to please your lover and the naughty sex check list."
"There's a check list?" he asked looking down at the pages of the magazine.
Olivia laughed.
"I'll give you the issue when I'm finished with it. How did it go in there?"
"Good, I guess. He gave me four weeks off to straighten things out."
"That's good."
Elliot exhaled.
"I don't even know where to start."
"Well, you could start by taking the crib out of the box and actually putting it together."
"Yeah," Elliot sighed as he picked up his baby and stared into her eyes. "Daddy has got so much to learn. But I'm going to do it, I promise you.
Olivia smiled as she watched him talk to the infant.
"Because you are worth it," he said as the little girl stared at him and cooed. "You are my entire world."
Olivia smiled again with tears in her eyes as tough guy Elliot completely melted for this tiny little girl.
That evening Olivia appeared on Elliot's doorstep with a pizza and a six pack of beer.
"Liv?" he said staring at her for a moment, surprised to see her.
"Are you gonna invite me in or should I just stand out here and wait for the next hungry guy to come along?"
Elliot laughed.
"Come on in."
"I brought dinner. I figured you could use a little help setting up the nursery."
She said the pizza box on the counter and made a bee line for the bassinette.
"Hi Allie," she said with her voice full of excitement as she picked the baby up.
"I get it now," Elliot said watching her with the baby. "You didn't come to see me at all. You are just using me to get to my kid. And the beer and pizza are pay off," he joked.
Olivia laughed.
"I can't help it. She is just so darn cute. It's good to see you too, by the way."
Elliot opened the pizza box and picked up a slice.
"Really though," he began, "I'm glad you're here. I can't get anything started on the nursery because every time I get right in the middle of something she starts crying."
"She's lonely."
"She's spoiled."
"El, she's a baby. What's the point in having a baby if you can't spoil them?"
Elliot smiled as he watched her bounce Allie playfully and talk baby talk to her.
"I guess you're right. But we have got to work something out where daddy can get some work done around here. This place is a train wreck. The trash needs taken out, the nursery needs set up and there is a pile of dirty laundry up to my waist."
"Goodness," Olivia said as Allie fussed.
"Half of it is pink," he said leaning in to kiss his daughter on the forehead. "And the other half, my half, is only in there because itis covered in baby goo.
"Goo?" Olivia asked.
"Kind of a mixture of poo and vomit."
"Sounds like you two have been having all kinds of fun."
"Oh yeah. It has been a real adventure, let me tell you."
"I have an idea. Why don't I help you set up the nursery tonight and tomorrow I can knock off work a few hours early and take Allie while you work on the rest of this mess?"
"Are you sure you can handle it?"
Olivia laughed.
"Piece of cake. I have been around her before, Elliot."
"Right, but now she leaks. Bad."
"I'm sure I can handle it. We can go shopping and get our nails done."
"You're going to take a baby to get her nails done?"
"Well, she can watch me get mine done. And when she is a little bigger she can get her's done, too."
"What exactly are you shopping for?"
"Whatever," Olivia said shrugging her shoulders.
"Is there any chance I could give you my credit card and you could pick up a few things for her?"
"Sure. What do you need?"
"More diapers and formula. I like to stay stocked up. I ran out of formula once and I never want to go through that again."
"Good thinking," Olivia agreed.
"And maybe some more clothes. Now that she is staying for good, she really needs more clothes. And some in the next size up. She's really growing and she isn't going to fit in these forever."
"This could be fun," Olivia cooed to the baby.
As she did Allie fixed her eyes on Olivia's and smiled.
"Oh El, she smiled at me!"
"Make her do it again," Elliot ordered rushing to the junk drawer in the kitchen for the digital camera.
"I don't know if I can make her."
"Try, please. I want to get a picture for her baby book and she never does that for me."
"She likes me," Olivia cooed as Allie stared at her and widened her little blue eyes. "Don't you Allie? You want Aunt Olivia to take you shopping with daddy's credit card," Olivia cooed and Allie smiled again and cooed as well.
"Got it! That is so cute," Elliot said showing Olivia the picture.
"I want one of those for my desk at work. Yes, I do," Olivia said to Allie.
Elliot carried his daughter's bouncy seat into the room they were about to turn into her nursery.
"Alright little lady," Olivia said buckling Allie into the seat and putting the pacifier into her little mouth, "I have to help your daddy fix up your bedroom. So you can sit over here and supervise, alright?"
Allie watched quietly for two and a half hours as Elliot and Olivia figured out how to set the crib up.
"There," Elliot said as they slid it into place against the wall.
"Where did you put the bedding?"
"It's in the laundry room. I washed it all with her special soap so that it was ready to use when we got the crib set up."
"Ooh, good thinking. I'll go get it."
"Oh El, this is beautiful," she said as she returned a few minutes later.
"Yeah? I wanted something pretty and girly without being all pink. You think green is okay for a girl?"
"It is sage and it is very pretty. She is going to love it," Olivia said holding up the quilt.
She smoothed her fingertips over each detail of the design featuring a field of dusty pink roses and detailed sage foliage on a crisp white background. Broad widths of snuggly ribbed white chenille lined the top and bottom of the reversible blanket, backed with the botanical print.
"I want bedding like this and I'm a grown up," she added with a smile as she nestles the crib blanket against her cheek. "It is so soft."
"Just help me put it on the mattress," Elliot said with a laugh.
After they had the nursery completed, Olivia sat on the sofa and gave Allie her bottle. She stared down at the little girl and told her a story. She began telling Allie the story of a princess and filled in the details she couldn't remember with random improvisational thoughts.
Elliot laughed.
"That's not how I remember it. You are mixing up Cinderella with the Princess and the Pea. And I'm not even sure where you are getting some of it."
"You stay out of it," Olivia said pointing her finger at him. "She doesn't care as long as I tell her a story. She's falling asleep," She said raising the baby to her shoulder to burp her.
"She gets to spend her first night in her new crib tonight," Elliot replied sitting his end of the baby monitor on the end table.
"Well, sleep tight angel. Aunt Liv will come visit you tomorrow after work," she whispered kissing the sleeping baby on the forehead as she handed Allie back to Elliot.
Olivia watched as he laid Allie gently in her crib and wound the mobile to play a soft lullaby. They backed slowly out of the room and pulled the door behind them.
"You'll keep me updated on our cases?" he asked Olivia.
"You are supposed to be on leave."
"Right, and after about the second day I am gonna be going crazy."
"Don't worry about work. I can handle things for a few weeks. I'm working with Cragen until you return, I may be the one going crazy."
"Good point," Elliot laughed.
"I'll drop by after work and bring you your messages. I'll bring dinner if you call and tell me what you want."
"I could get used to this."
"Well, like you said, I'm using you for your kid."
Olivia smiled.
"Good night, Olivia."
"Night El," she said as she headed for the elevator.