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She was a chicken shit. No doubt about that. Billie had not left her house in three days. Other then to get a coffee and some Taco Hell crunchwrap she didn't want to deal with the outside world.
Billie sat at her kitchen island sipping on some soda as she was reading the local paper she had snagged from a nearby gas station on a mission for some flaming hot Cheetos. Her eyes scanned over the paper looking for anything that stood out to her as she saw a article a few bodies that were found floating in the river the night before. from what she read they were so decomposed that they were still waiting on getting the bodies identified by dental records.
She turned the paper reading more on random crap as she licked her lips still tasting the blood of some poor chap she snagged on the way back home. She needed to keep up with feeding when she woke up so she was so bat shit crazy later on. She had called the bar saying she needed a few nights off so she didn't have to encounter David or any of those fruit loops knowing David would most likely tell them about her spaz attack after a fucking kiss. . After the shit she pulled on him she didn't want to know if her human mask had slipped at all. Plus she asked Tess to keep an eye out for her phone leaving it behind in her shit fit.
She felt bad for poor Kevin down the way. She had interrupted the kid in marathon of Call of duty or World of nerdy war fight or something. She couldn't remember the name. But the kid was wearing a cape and shit you not wizard cap when he answered the door. It took her a few seconds to force herself from laughing to ask to use his phone and after walking away she heard the poor kid faint on the other side of the door.
Oh nerds….she loved them. And he was just too damn cute to kill.
Picking up her drink she went to take a sip of it as someone knocked hard on her door. She glanced down the hallway from her kitchen island as she looked to her clock ticking on a wall near the hallways. It was almost one in the morning. Who the hell would be knocking at this time of night?
The knocking came again even louder as she figured it might have been Casey swinging by after another drunken night on the town. Folding her paper up she jumped off her chair walking down the short hallway as she peeked out the small hole not seeing anything but black someone covering up the peep hole. Her brows came together as she unlocked a few of her locked leaving the chain attached as she opened the door slowly peeking through the small opening.
She saw no one standing there as she shut the door once more. Just then knocking came up again on her door making her jump a bit as she yanked off the chain knowing it had to be Casey fucking with her.
'God damnit!' she snapped swinging the door open fully as her eyes went wide at two smiling faces she was not expecting to suddenly be standing there.
"Evening little lady," Paul smiled down to her leaning up against the door frame.
"You have a minute to talk about our Lord and Savoir?" Marko added in a serious voice.
"No Habla Ingles!" she snapped slamming the door right on their faces locking it. She could hear both the boys laughing on the other end and one of them knocked again.
"Come on open the door Billie!" she heard Paul laugh.
"How the fuck did you find my place!?" she yelled through the door.
"We followed you home." Marko said in a deep voice trying to be scary.
"Get the hell away from here or I'll call the cops!" she yelled.
"Unless you have a land line, which no one has now an days you might need this to call them, Baby girl." Paul said through the door. Billie looked through the peep hole finding Marko waving her cellphone in front of the hole.
"God damnit!" she hissed moving away from the peep hole as she unlocked the door once more leaving the chain still in as she opened the door slightly holding out her hand.
"Just give it to me and go away!" she said waving her hand for the phone.
"Ah we came all this way to bring it back to you and you don't wanna let us in?" Paul snickered.
"No this little piggy doesn't want to let the big bad wolves in. Go find someone else to play with!" she snapped waving her hand once more for Marko to give her the phone. Just then it was placed in her hand as she drew her hand back into her apartment slamming the door. She was about to lock the door once more when she noticed the phone in her hands was not hers.
God damn these boys.
Yanking the chain off she was done playing with them as she swung the door up to find both the boys still smiling at her as she didn't hide the fact she was pissed.
"Give me my phone or I will see how far I can throw yours out my window." She said holding the phone out towards them.
"Come on! Just let us come in for five minutes!" Paul said still leaning up against the door frame.
"No!" she snapped. "I don't let anyone into my apartment."
"Pretty please?" Marko asked with a pout.
"Don't pull the pout shit on me." She hissed reaching out for her phone in his hands as he stepped back quickly holding it out of her reach. Billie tried to snag it from his hands as he held it high above his head not realizing she was being baited out of her doorway.
"Holy crap you need to clean in here, Girl." She heard Paul voice echo down to her. She flipped around finding Paul was now standing at the end of her hallway looking around her apartment as she turned glaring at Marko as she slammed her fist into his gut as he bucked over in pain she grabbed her phone turning to walk back into her apartment to get Paul out.
These asshole played her good to get her in apartment.
Paul walked farther into her apartment as he began to pick though stuff on her couch.
"Don't touch anything!" she snapped walked towards him quickly as she slapped a few papers out of his hand. "It's a chaotic mess I understand."
"Jesus you're messier then Dwayne is." Marko said as Billie flipped around seeing him now standing in the middle of her apartment.
"Get out!" she snapped as her hand shot out to grab Paul by the ear hard.
"Ouchie!" Paul wined as she dragged him towards the hallway. She went to reach for Marko who jumped out of her reach to walk farther into her apartment.
"I'm not leaving." Marko said in a matter of fact voice.
"Yes you are!" she hissed as she snapped her finger at him and pointed towards the door.
"Not until I see it." Marko said crossing his arms.
"See what?" she asked as Paul was able to yank himself out of her hold.
"He's gotta see your room, Baby." Paul said jumping backwards out of Billie swipe for him once more.
"No one is allowed in my Purple play room but me!" she snapped. "now get the hell out of my house."
"Why not?" Marko asked her as he walked around a couch looking down another hallway to where her room and bathroom were.
"Because I don't let anyone near my shit." She snapped almost wanting to stomp her foot like a three year old.
"I wanna let you in on a little secret." Paul said stepping closer to her and he tossed an arm over her shoulders.
"And what is that?" she asked dramatically up to him.
"You and Marko here share something in common." Paul said.
"What?" she asked confused.
"The toys you collect." Marko said over to her. "I wanna see if you have more then I do."
"I'm the one calling bullshit on that." Billie laughed shaking her head. "There is no way in hell you have the same shit I do. And they are not Toys! They are tools."
Marko gave her a smile like he was about to prove her wrong as he reached into his jacket pocket pulling out his phone. He clicked on a few things as he walked closer to her and Paul. He held out the phone showing her the screen as she saw a tool she knew pretty well.
"Heretic's Forks?" she said reaching out to grab the phone to look at the pictures. She looked over the image as she saw this was polished and a newer belt was added to it.
"I bet my bottom dollar you know all about those." Paul said nodding to the phone.
"Yeah, it was created for people who either spoke the lords name in vain or for liars. They would be tied in an upright position, unable to lay down. And this placed under their chin and against their breast bone while thick belt was strapped around their neck. The person had to stay awake or it would have been a very unpleasant wake up." Billie said looking at the picture before she looked up to Marko.
"This is a new one. Where did you get it?" she asked.
"I made it." He said.
"Bullshit." She said. As he leaned over his phone swiping the pictures to show more pictures of it in its rough stages. She could see where he had forged it its polished stages. Billie looked at the pictures carefully as he swiped over before she slapped his hand away at another picture of something different he was working on.
"You're making a Iron Maiden?" she asked looking at a picture of a tall coffin looking thing. She could see Marko kneeling down welding mask on as he was kneeling before the metal coffin welding doors on.
"Trying too." He said with a shrug of his shoulder. "Making my own version of it. So I'm just going off pictures online."
Billie looked over the picture of the large Iron Maiden in the picture as she studied it.
"I'm slightly weirded out that your into the same shit as I am." She said out loud.
"Believe me we were all shocked to find a little lady like yourself into the same shit as us-I mean Marko." Paul said. She was looking at the picture missing Marko glare up at Paul for the slip up.
"You got the spikes in the wrong spot.." She said looking at the picture.
"What do you mean?" Marko asked looking back down at the phone.
"They are put in a specific spot to certain body parts that it would embedded itself into.." She said with a sigh knowing she had studied about Maiden a bit too much. She handing the phone back to him deciding to just show him what she meant. She knew these fucktarts wouldn't leave until she showed them and she was in no mood to fight them. Plus she had a strict rules with herself about killing anyone in her apartment
. She pulled herself out of Paul hold walking to her Purple room door. She swung it open flipping on the light as all the lights in the cases lit up. Both Marko and Paul moved to the door slowly as they glanced in mouths falling open.
"Holy…." Marko started to say.
"…Shit." Paul finished. Their eyes scanned the large room at all the cases lining the walls. They were full of every tool you could think of that was made for torture. Marko and Paul both fought to get through the door at the same time as they finally stepped into the room of horror. Marko walked to the left looking along the glass cases. There were old rusted and newer looking tools that he had no idea what the hell they were for…but he wanted them. He paused at a case seeing it was full of turn of the century tools that were used by doctors as well. Some of the tool looked so menacing it would send a chill up anyone back.
Paul on the other hand was in complete utter shock. He didn't even know what the hell most of the tools were and made a mental note not to fall asleep around Billie anytime soon most likely already on her shit list.
One thing the boys could both tell about this room was the smell of death. This crazy little lady collected the real shit.
"This gentleman is a authentic Iron Maiden." Billie said catching both of their attention as she was standing next to tall thing with a black sheet over it. She had placed the sheet over it to keep the dust off one of her most prized collectables. She grabbed the sheet pulling it off as she looked back to see Marko eyes go so wide they were a hair away from popping out of his sockets. He brought his hands to the side of his face as his mouth fell open in shock.
Slowly he walked across the room towards it in total awe.
"Allow me to introduce my favorite." She said holding her hands up like she was gameshow hostess and talked like she was trying to sell a car on TV.. "it comes with sixteen lovely spikes. All original metal. A cavity for the head. Many believe these never existed. And were a made up according to historians. But I give you this lovely lady. Build between or around the years of 1500 to god only knows when. She was unearthed in a field by a local German man. He was going to give it to a museum. But little old Billie-Jean saw his Facebook post and offered him a shit ton of money. So now she rules here."
Marko came to a stop before the large metal casket the doom mouth still hanging open as Billie reached over closing his mouth for him. She stepped in front of him still holding the sheet in her hands as she grabbed the doors of the Maiden pulling them open slowly not wanting to touch the wood or metal with her fingers.
She looked back to Marko who just stood there looking at the Maiden. He had no words.
"Where the hell have you been in the last few decades?" Marko said looking over at Billie. She gave a laugh rolling her eyes as she turned to Paul who was looking into someone of the glass cases. Billie noted he had stopped at the glass case where some tools that from the Civil war time. He was looking at a something that looked like a bike chain that had sharp teeth across the metal and handles on each side.
"That's a Bone Chain Saw." She said as Paul glanced towards her. "It was used on the fields of Civil war when the doctors had to take a limbs quickly. I think they are the reason the term Bite the Bullet came from as well."
Paul only made a "OH" with his lips as he glanced back down to the case to look over all the tools.
"So I have to say something." Paul said leaning up from the case looking around the room.
"When don't you have something to say?" Billie said. She was ready for anything these guys had to say about her room. Only a few have seen it and most of them have never come back.
"First," he said leaning up against the glass case looking over to her. "I'm slightly disappointed this wasn't really a sex room. I was really hoping you were lying to hide the fact you had one."
"So sorry to disappoint you." Billie said noticing Marko reaching out to touch the Maiden as she slap his hand quickly.
"No touchie." She snapped. "She super fragile. And the wood is decaying faster then I want it too."
"On a second note." Paul said getting her attention again as he scanned the room and all its stuff before sending her a sideways look. "I'm super impressed with the amount of dedication you put in to collect this stuff. You put all the shit Marko has found over the years to shame."
"You just saying that to take the edge off on how weird I actually am?" she laughed seeing Marko grabby hands going for another touch as she slapped them again pointing a finger at him warning him.
"Naw I mean it." Paul said pushing away from the glass case. "Like this is super fucking impressive. David and Dwayne are most likely not going believe us when we tell them about this. They are going to want to see it."
"Can I take some pictures?" Marko asked turning to look around the room.
"Sure." She said after a second shrugging her shoulders. Marko pulled his phone back out of his back pocket as he began to snap pictures of the Maiden and began to walk around the case taking pictures of other items.
"What the hell is this?" he asked pointing to something in case as Billie noticed Paul was slipping back out the door slowly. She didn't trust the fucker in her apartment as she walked over to a shelf grabbing a book before handing it to Marko.
"Page twenty five." She said. "its called a Pear of anguish. This book has all sorts of bloody details of everything in my room."
Marko took the book flipping it open to see it was filled with mostly hand writing, photos and drawings. He turned a few pages reading a few of the notes.
"Damn you did do research on all this shit." He said flipping through a few more pages.
"Like I said," she said walked backwards out of her Purple room to go find Paul. "I'm fascinated with death."
She left Marko in her Purple room trusting him not to do anything stupid as she went to hunt the other one she didn't trust down. She walked out of her room looking around the living room spying him in the kitchen opening and closing the cupboards.
'What the hell are you looking for?" she asked walking towards the kitchen.
"You're a bartender. You gotta have booze stashed somewhere around here." He said opening up another cupboard.
"Look in the freezer." She said. Paul looked at her over his shoulder then to the fridge as he walked over to it swinging the freezer open spying it was stocked full of liquor. She had no need for real food so she had stocked up on nothing but her other favorite thing. Lots of booze.
"Liver killing Jackpot!" he said reaching into the freeze to pull out of few bottles to look at what they were. Billie just rolled her eyes as she glanced towards the door to her Purple room seeing Marko was standing at a case flipping through pages taking pictures still.
It was weird. Somehow she was hoping it would scare them off. But once again these weirdo surprised her. She turned back to the kitchen watching Paul pulling out three glasses to put them on the counter as he was getting ready to make some drinks. She also noticed he pulled out all the bottles of booze.
"Whatever you plan on making I better approve that shit." Billie said leaning up against the island. She had long gotten over trying to drive them out of her house because she knew they would find a reason to stay.
"Oh what I'm going make you're going love." He said as he began to pick up bottles. Billie watched him for a minute before she felt her inner bartender beginning to take over as she watched Paul pouring an odd mix into a glass her head slowly tilting at the liquor he was grabbing. She knew what he was making wasn't any drink she had ever learned to make.
"Take a drink of this!" he said turning around holding a glass full of god knows what. He walked a crossed the kitchen setting the glass down in front of Billie. She looked at the glass seeing it was the color of shit. Literally.
"Um…what the hell do you call this?" she asked staring at the drink.
"I call it Paulie cocktail surprise." He said leaning on the counter with both hands a wide smile on his face.
"Are you sure its not Poo cocktail." She picked up the drink as she took a smell of it before she felt her nose hairs curl backwards. "Dear baby Jesus. You cant pay me with my soul returned to drink this shit."
"Oh come on don't be a chicken." He said nodding to the glass. "I promise you its taste better then it looks."
Billie gave him a 'Are you fucking kidding me?' look as she leaned back in her chair as she decided to get someone else input on this shit.
"Hey Marko come here a second." She called to him. Marko walked out of the room book still in hand looking over to where Billie and Paul were.
"What's up?" he asked.
"I want you to take a drink of this." Billie said holding the brown colored glass up.
"Oh god you let him make you a fucking Paulie cocktail surprise?" Marko asked making a disgusted shocked face at the drink in her hands.
"I wasn't expecting it." Billie said with a smile. "I'll make you a deal, if you can take a full drink of this shit to let me know its not poison I will let you touch my Maiden."
Marko looked to the drink then to Paul then behind him to the Maiden against the back wall then back around to Billie holding the drink out to him. He slammed the book shut as he walked towards where Billie was sitting as he took the glass out of his hands. Billie watched as he went to lift the drink up to his mouth willing to take the dare as he had to set the book down and plug his nose.
"No, no you can't plug your nose." She said. Marko looked to the drink in his hands as he glanced over to Paul.
"Like it told you the first time I drank this shit. I fucking hate you.." He said before he took a quick drink. As soon as the drink hit his lips Marko slapped a hand over his mouth to keep himself from spitting it out as he tried to swallow it. He shook his head fast as he was quick to leap up onto the kitchen island counter right over the sink to spit the drink out.
Billie began to laugh at the sight of Marko basically throwing up into the sink body hanging off the edge of the counter the stacks of papers she had flying everywhere.
"Water…give me water damnit!" Marko yelled as he flipped the sink on and began to drink from the spout upside down. Billie was laughing so hard she fell right off her stool to the ground.
'Fuck you pussy its not that bad!" Paul snapped grabbing the glass of vile liquor. He took a few good chugs of it before setting the glass down. Billie was able to climb back up the stool just in time to see Paul down the rest of the drink.
Marko on the other hand was scrubbing his mouth out with his fingers still leaning over the sink spitting out what taste he still had of the drink. Billie finally stopped her laughing fit as she sat at the counter once more.
'So how is it you are able to drink that toxic shit and this one is dying?" she asked pointing a finger to Marko who finally slid off the counter. As she snickered at Marko still making a sour face sticking it tongue out over and over again like a dog that ate something sour.
"Because this piece of shit-" Marko began as he had to shake his head still tasting the gross liquor, "Makes that thing all the time and drinks it for fun."
"Do you have a liver?" Billie asked Paul he only shrugged his shoulders.
"Once a upon a time I did." He said. Billie looked over at poor Marko as she shook her head jumping off the stool to walk into the kitchen.
"Get out you mad scientist." She said to Paul pushing him out of the small kitchen. "I will show you how to make a real drink."
Billie opened a cupboard grabbing some shot glasses and a few other glasses as she set them up on the kitchen island as she began to grab bottles.
"You mean we don't have to pay for drinks here?" Paul joked. Billie grabbed her Jaws cookie jar as she set it on the count flipping open as the JAWS shark theme came out of it.
"Please tip your bartender." She said smiling seductively to Paul. "I might just give you a show, there a guillotine online for sale that momma wants."
Paul reached into his pocket slamming a roll of money onto the counter.
"You too sit down. I know a drink that will clear your taste buds of the toxic sludge you just drank." She said to Marko as he slid into bar stool next to Paul. Billie began to grab bottle pouring them into the shot glasses as the boys watched her work her magic on making a drink.
"I call this to Toodles shot." She said setting the drinks down in front of the boys.
"Toodles?" Paul laughed.
"Yeah after six of these your going to have to say Toodles to the world." She said with a wave. Marko and Paul laughed as they took the shot.
"Yum fruity." Marko said setting his glass back down towards Billie.
"Help wash that crap out of your mouth?" Billie asked.
"Some what." Marko said. "That crap has a long lasting aftertaste."
Billie grabbed the shot glasses cleaning them out to make another drink. If she played her cards right would hopefully get the boys wasted enough to leave her apartment.
"Hey if we are going to be drinking shouldn't the host be as well?" Marko asked looking over to Paul as if catching onto her plan.
"I agree, no reason for us to drink through all these bottles without someone helping us put a dent in them." Paul said.
Billie just rolled her eyes. She had a high alcohol tolerance being a vampire so she would most like out drink them.
"Okay I'm game." She said pouring herself a Toodles shot she took it quickly slamming the glass down.
"Now impress us with some fancy shots woman." Paul said.
"You have no idea what you guys are in for. All my drinks are knock you off your stool sneaky drinks." she said.
"Bring it." Paul said in deep voice slamming his fist down on the counter. "I want to be able to feel my liver pulsating like the good old days."
"Challenge accepted." Billie said grabbing the bottle and began to pour more shots.
Two hours later and after Paul had busted out the weed all three of them were dying of laughter around the kitchen. Paul was half naked sitting at the counter smoking a joint. At some point he bitched about being hot so he yanked off his shirt tossing it someplace over his shoulders. As for Marko was now sitting on the counter acting like he was driving a car with a paper plate making the revving noises with his mouth.
"Marko…." Paul slurred up to his friend. Marko paused for a moment from shifting his imaginary gears to look down at Paul.
"Whats?" Marko asked Paul blinking a few times to make the three Paul's spinning stand still.
"Weren't we supposed…..to….be…doing…going…" he said slowly trying to get his thoughts together yo form a sentence. "we were supposed to be…fuck I can't remember. "
Marko only smiled wide at him as a cheesy giggle came out of him dramticly shrugging his shoulders.
"Dude, I'm trying to remember how the fuck I climbed up here." Marko laughed as he looked down to the floor kicking his legs. "it's a fucking long ways down to the floor."
Billie couldn't help but snicker at the comment drawing both of the Boys attention back to her.
"My lady friend…." Paul said after a silent moment pointing a finger as Billie was leaning up again the counter licking her own joint paper to seal it shut.
"Yes my drunk'n friend." She asked with a snicker.
"Why are…you no wasted?" he asked in a slur pointing to the shot glasses in front of them. "I've counted…you need to be…plastered."
Billie placed the joint to her lips as she gave him a wide goofy smile.
"Oh I'm wasted" she said with a smile.
"Your still…standing." Paul pointed out pulling the joint from his own lips to hand up to Marko who was tilting a little to far towards him to shove him back up sitting right.
"I've been sitting on one of my drawers for the last…." Billie paused lighting her joint. "Well I can't remember when I sat down."
Both Paul and Marko leaned over the counter seeing Billie was indeed sitting sideways on one of her drawers and both of them began to laugh hysterically. Marko leaned back a bit to far as his world slipped out under him as he fell backwards his back hitting the counter as he did a back flip off it face first to the kitchen floor. Paul lost it head flying backwards as he began to laugh even harder if that was possible leaning back as he lost his balance in his chair arms flapping as he fell backwards hitting the carpet floor hard.
Billie was just sitting there with the joint between her lips having watched Marko face plant it to her kitchen floor and Paul take flight backwards his feet had kicked a bunch of paper up as they floated back down to the floor. She said nothing as she reached up pulling the joint from her lips a wide smile on her lips.
"I winnnnnnnnnn!' she sang out. She was in no better shape herself as she pushed herself up from the drawer looking down to where Marko was still laying. Snoring came up from him as she could only laugh realizing he had straight passed out.
She felt the world spinning and swayed around the corner holding onto the kitchen counter for dear life to see Paul was also passed out as well. She got to her knees crawling to where he was as she grabbed the joint laying next to him before he caught her place on fire.
"I must…get…you guys home…that was the plan." She said leaning over Paul as she gave his cheeks a few good playful slaps. Not getting any response for him. She had given these boys enough liquor the knock out a gorilla for a few days. Boy were they going to hate her tomorrow. She crawled over him and down the floor by the island counter as she reached up still on her knees feeling around until she found Marko phone. Grabbing it she swiped the screen open staring at it so intensely trying to make the three spinning phones to slow down to become one so she could find either Dwayne or David number. Knowing they were going to need come get these guys out of here…somehow.
"That looks like David's naaaame." she sang out as clicked on it. Holding the phone to her ear she rocked back and forth against the wall under the counter to the music Paul had begged her not to put on.
"Where the fuck are you guys?" David voice snapped on the other end.
"Daaaaaaaavid!" she sang into the phone.
"Billie?" he asked shocked on the other end. "Why the hell do you have Marko phone?"
"I believe I killed him." She said in a drunk'n matter of fact voice.
"WHAT?" he yelled on the other end.
"Shhhhhhhhh." She said putting a finger to her lips. "No need to yell. I only have one…I mean two ears. I like them. Makes my face nice and even and pretty, I'm thinking of gauging them up another size."
"Are you fucking drunk?" he said almost in a laugh.
"Nooooo, never…but they are…they didn't believe me." Billie said. "Ooo David I like this song! David don't you like this song!?" she held out the phone so he could hear it blasting from her speakers.
"Hear it?" she said holding the phone back to her ear. "Paul didn't believe that I know all the backstreet boys lyrics…I showed him." She said proudly.
"Babe, I don't give a fuck about the Backstreet boys, where the hell are my boys?" David laughed.
"How dare you bash on my teenage crush! Aj was H-O-T." Billie said as she began to sing into the phone Larger then life in a drunken slur.
"Yeeeeeeeah, every time we're down. Yeeeeeh, you can make it right, Yeah, and that's what makes you larger than liiiiiifffeeeee!" Billie basically half yelled half sang into the phone.
"Billie!" David said getting her attention.
"Yes cutie pie?" she cooed back. "You know why you're a cutie pie? Cuz I wanna eat you."
"You cant eat me later," he laughed. "Are they still at your place?"
"Who still at my place?" she asked confused.
"Paul or Marko. They are not answering me." David laughed.
Billie looked around her living room spying Paul snoring still laying on his back passed out totally forgetting he was there.
'Oh hey Paul is here! What's up buddie!?" she said laughing as she crawled over towards him slapping his legs to try and wake him up.
"David, Paul is here!" she said into the phone. "But I think I killed him. No wait he's snoring…so I don't think I did. And I don't know where his shirt went. Do you?"
"Jesus Christ." David said on the other end. "Dwayne and I are almost to your place."
"Oh Oh Oh! Pick me up some take out!" she said into the other end as she got an idea to mess with the passed out Paul. "I'd kill for some Orange chicken."
"I am not picking up take out." He said.
"Pleaseeeeeeeeee, I don't believe I can hunt someone down right now, I cant….walk a straight line right now officer." Billie crawled back towards the counter reaching up to find her coffee cup with a bunch of pens and markers in it. She grabbed pens the first few grabs then finally got a sharpie as she crawled back towards Paul.
"I am not picking you up any food right now." David laughed.
"You're so mean. Big fat meanie." She said as she crawled up Paul straddling his waist. Gripping the sharpie lid between her teeth she yanked it free as she held the lid in her lips as she began to doodle all over Pauls face. She began to write words on his face and draw a mustache and wrote "Enter cock here" across his chin with two arrows to his face. Soon her doodles started down his neck to his chest as she drew a bunch of naughty pictures for people having sex across his chest.
"I'm not being mean you just need to go to bed." David said. "Now come open the door."
"Who's door?" Billie asked while trying to keeping the cap between her teeth drawing on Paul face again making him look like he had huge bushy eyebrows.
"Your door!" David said as Billie heard pounding on her front door.
"Hold on David someone at my door." She said as she pulled the phone away to yell at the door. "I already found god go away!"
She placed the phone back to her ear as she went back to doodling.
"I should have yell I spreken ze deutsch! Most of them fuckers speak Spanish." She said.
"What you just said doesn't make any fucking sense. It's us at the door." David said as knocking came to the door again. "Come open it up. I don't want to break it down."
"Oh shit! It's you!?" she said climbing off Paul to try and stand. She staggered from one side to the other as she hit almost everything there was on the way to the door. She looked through the peep hole phone still to her ear.
"David…I see you…" she said with a snicker.
"Great now open the fucking door." He laughed looking at the peep hole.
"Where the fuck is my orange chicken?" she asked into the phone. "I don't see or smell it."
"We didn't stop now open up." He said she could see Dwayne laugh and shake his head.
"What's the password?" she said in a little kids voice.
"Me not kicking your door down. Now open up!" he said leaning closer to the Peep hole to glare right at Billie. She heard the door knob jiggle as She rolled her eyes unlocking the door to swinging it open.
"Evening Governor!" she said holding her hands up as she lost her balance falling backwards. Both David and Dwayne reached out grabbing her fast.
"Table for four…I mean two…" she said looking at the guys as she grabbed Dwayne shirt squinting her eyes as she stared at him intensely. "Well I think there are two of you. Stay still!"
"We are not moving, Woman." Dwayne laughed as he shook his head swinging up Billie bridal style as he walked into the apartment. David closed the door behind him locking it as he followed behind Dwayne eyes searching for his idiot buddies.
"Fucking hell! What did you do to him?" David asked seeing Paul passed out cold on the ground. His face covered in Billie beautiful art work.
"What ever do you mean?" Billie giggled looking down to where Paul was. "I found him like that, Officer I swear."
"I mean what did you give him to end up like this?" David asked kicking Paul in the side with his foot getting no reaction from him.
"I gave him lots of Toodles. A bunch of zombie brain freeze, and Black bloody mamba, like seven Cherry twisters and-" Billie said still in Dwayne arms as she began to count off the drink on her hands. Both David and Dwayne looked at each other not believing what was coming out of her mouth.
"Woah waoh! Wait a fucking moment." He said waving his hands at her to stop as he pointed to the man on the ground. "You're telling me this fucking is straight passed out from Booze?"
"I had to teach him a lesson." Billie said as she pushed away from Dwayne. He let her slid to the ground but still had a hold around her waist helping her walk to the kitchen counter as she grabbed the joint she had dropped to relit it for a few hits.
"What fucking lesson did you have to teach him?" David laughed looking around the apartment for the other idiot. "And where the fuck is Marko?"
"I forgot why I gave him the sneaky drinks." She said while she held up her hands sticking out her bottom lip as she shrugged her shoulders dramatically trying to act innocent. Dwayne noticed feet on the kitchen floor as he recognized Marko shoes he took a step into the kitchen seeing Marko as passed out on the floor. Marko just then let up a loud snore and a fart.
"He right here." Dwayne said pointing to the kitchen. David walked to the counter leaning over it to indeed find Marko sleeping on the ground.
"How the hell did you get both of them fucking Plastered in such a short amount of time?" David asked looking back to Billie who just giggled like a little school girl. Dwayne walked into the kitchen looking at all the booze sitting still out still not touched then to the other counter where about five bottles sat empty.
"I gave Paul sneaky drinks for the shit he tired to give me…." She said trailing off.
"What did he try to give you?" David laughed shaking his head rubbing his brow wondering how the hell he and Dwayne were going to get these passed out idiots home. What he couldn't understand was how this girl got two vampires that knew how to hold their liquor smashed. It would take all night to get any of the boys drunk at this level and high grade booze and she succeeded it in two and half hours.
"OH YEAH!" Billie yelled suddenly remembering everything. She startled both David and Dwayne as she looked down at Paul and pointed at him.
"He tried to give me a poop supreme cocktail!" she said as she looked at David. "But I made Marko drink it so he could get a chance to fondle my Maiden!"
"Paul made one of his cocktail surprise and Marko drank that shit?" Dwayne laughed stepping over Marko to grab a glass to pour himself some whiskey. "Marko wouldn't drink that crap just to touch any woman pussy."
"Not my pussy." Billie said waving a finger at him as she turned pointing to a open door. "My beautiful Iron Maiden. He wanted to feel her up badly!"
David and Dwayne turned to the door as Billie began to stagger to the doorway. Billie lost her balance almost as David was there to catch her again.
"To the door!" she said. David walked her to the door as she slapped her hand against the wall trying to find the switch as she found the light turning it on. David mouth fell open seeing the vast collection he didn't believe she had. Again this woman surprised the hell out of him.
"Holy crap you were not kidding on having all this shit." He said. Just then his head snapped to the side after Billie slap him hard. David turned his head back slowly towards Billie who was glaring up at him.
"Its not shit." She said shoving a finger into his chest. "these are my babies. I love my babies and they are very sensitive to negativity."
"I'm gonna let that slap slide since your drunk." David said down to her.
'I didn't slap you… I just gavvve your face… a high fivvve." She said as her words began to slur together as she began to sway in his arms the liquor finally making her body shut down for the night. She must have drank the same amount as Paul and Marko but was proven the champ lasting this long.
"I need a ciggy." She said leaning her face up against Davids chest as she patted his arm wrapped around her.. "If I cant eat someone…let me eat a ciggy."
David rolled his eyes giving a short laugh as he picked up Billie walking towards a couch as he stopped seeing all the shit on it.
"Jesus she worse then you at cleaning up after herself. Come move this shit." David said looking over to Dwayne who was leaning up against the counter cup of whiskey in his hands as he downed it really quick. He pushed off the counter walking towards the couch as he leaned over shoving all the clothes, papers and shoes to the floor.
David laid Billie down on the couch as she was slipping in and out of slumber. Leaning back up he didn't get to far as Billie suddenly grabbed his shirt yanking him back down towards her.
"I'm hungry…" she said up to him. David reached out grabbing at her iron grasp of his shirt.
"Let take a raincheck on the orange chicken, we'll get you some tomorrow when you're not a hot mess." David said trying to push her back down to sleep.
"That's not what I want…." She said slowly with hooded eyes as stared up at David. "I can smell it…"
"And what is that?" David asked with a sideways smile down at her.
"Blood." Billie said in a sleepy voice. "I can smell it on you…and it fresh."
"You do realize what yours saying don't you?" he asked her. He was pretty sure she thought herself a fucking astronaut on planet Venus riding a unicorn so anything she said she wasn't going to remember in the morning.
"I'm a monster." She said up to him with a pout.
"You may be a lot of things but you're not a monster, Darlin." David snickered.
"No I am!" she said as she lifted up a hand waving him closer with a wiggle of her finger. He humored her leaning down as she leaned up to his ear to whisper into it.
"I'm a vampire…" she whispered. David rolled his eyes sitting back up giving her the most fake shocked face.
'A vampire? No way!" he mocked down to her. She held up a finger to her lips making a loud wet 'SHHHHHHHH!' against it.
"Don't let Dwayne know!" she said. "He already thinks I'm a fruitcake!"
"He already knows." David said as Billie eyes went from him to where Dwayne was leaning over the couch sending her a wide mocking smile and a wave.
"Oh no…now I have to kill you all." She said with a pout. "I actually liked you two."
"You don't have to do shit but sleep." David stood up from the couch as Billie grabbed at his hand once more.
"Just a little nibble?" she asked with a cheesy smile. "Pretty pleaaaaassssse?!"
David let out a deep sigh as he looked down at the woman gripping his wrist giving him the biggest Puppy pout any one could muster up and a fluttered her eyelashes at him fast.
"If I let you will you fucking go to sleep?" he asked her. "Your worst then trying to put Paul to bed after shrooms."
"I will sleep so good." She said up to him. "I don't think I could catch myself a rabbit right now. I promise I wont kill you…just a nibble?"
Dwayne just let out a laugh pushing away from the couch to smile up at David.
"How could you say no to that face?" Dwayne laughed.
David lifted up a hand and drew it across the skin of his neck as Billie leaned up on autopilot toward he dark stream of blood running from his wound. She opened her mouth running her tongue over David's skin licking the blood up slowly. She opened her mouth as she pressed her fangs against his skin driving them in deep as David didn't move as she began to feed from him. His hand went to the back of her head helping hold the drunk woman up as she swallowed as much blood as she could. David and Dwayne had just finished hunting down their kills for the night when Billie had called so he had blood to spare.
He listened to her swallow a few times until her arm fell limp against him as her mouth fell away from his neck. David sat back up looking down to the slumbering woman watching some of his blood trail down from the corner of her mouth down her chin. Slowly he laid Billie back against the couch as he dragged his thumb across her skin to clean the blood off. Sitting there he thought about looking into her mind to see just where this woman was from and how long she had been a vampire.
His power surged around them as he tried to unlock her mind shoving past the wall he began to drug deep seeing her life. Her family. He saw picnics and playing at a park with her siblings. He shuffled through all her memories but could not find went she was turned into a vampire. Something seemed to be missing. He could see her graduating high school but then it went black. Like a piece of the puzzle was ripped out.
Then it just turned red. He could see her kneeling in a room looking at her hand that were dripping in blood. He could feel her pain and confusion on what was happening to her as she scanning all the mutilated bodies of her victims. He felt her fear of what she just did not understanding what she was.
"there got to be more then that." David said as he lifted up a hand to slowly move a strand of her hair out of her face trying to dig deeper into the mind to the blackout area of her memories. Either she could not remember or something was keeping her from seeing what happened to her to change. David felt no connection in her to any Sire. No one who could be holding onto that mind to keep her from remembering.
Just as he was shoving his power into the darker part of her mind a flash of a bloody cross and people chanting screamed out at him with power almost burning him as he jumped up from the couch. Dwayne was busy dragging Marko out from the kitchen as he jumped as well feeling the surge of power escape from her dropping Marko legs.
"what the fuck was that?" Dwayne asked. David said nothing still locked onto Billie face as he felt the power surge around them as the walls of power build higher in her mind locking him out instantly.
David shared a glance with Dwayne who walked back over to the couch to lean over it to look down at the slumbering vampire.
"what ever the fuck that was it doesn't want us or Billie to know that missing memory in her mind." David said after a moment.
David thought about trying to enter her mind once more but knew it wouldn't be as easy as before. Walking around the couch he stopped looking down at the passed out vampire snoring away on Billie floor
"You think Trevor is still awake?" David asked smiling over to Dwayne. "I think we need to make Billie work of art permanent on this fuckers face."
Dwayne let out a deep laugh liking the idea.
It was the feeling of the sun setting that woke her up. Her eyes fluttered open as she saw she was staring at the ceiling of her living room. Slowly she pushed herself up as she let a large yawn come to her mouth. Running a hand over her head she looked around her room wondering why the hell she was sleeping on her couch. She had no memory of falling asleep here. Looking around her apartment she yawned once more as she slowly pushed herself up from the couch to stand.
Her memory was fuzzy as she walked towards the kitchen to get a glass of water her throat feeling dry. She walked to the sink as she grabbed a glass filling it up with some cold water downing it quickly. After finishing the glass of water she sat it down as she looked around her kitchen trying to remember what the hell happened last night. She then noticed all the empty bottles of liquor sitting by her sink as she picked up one brows coming together.
Just then she remembered what happened. She got shit face last night with a capital S.
She looked around her kitchen and then her living room as she didn't see either Paul or Marko. She didn't see them as she walked quickly through her apartment to check her bedroom not finding anyone sleeping there and checked her bathroom yanking the shower curtain back not seeing anyone in the tub.
"What the hell?" she said rubbing her face. She couldn't remember half the night. It had been a long ass time since she was able to get wasted like that. She walked back into the apartment as she glanced towards her door to the her Purple room as she walked quickly to it throwing the door open flipping on the light. Her eyes scanned the room as she began to count everything she had making sure nothing was missing.
When the hell did they leave? She felt a bit of panic come over her hoping they didn't see her in her weakest form. She walked back out of the room as she scanned the apartment once more not seeing anything missing or that she could tell it was still a mess.
She stood there trying to replay the night before most of it hazy. She last remembered taking shots with Paul and Marko then the rest was a fuzzy. she looked to where a bar stool was laying on its side as she remembered Paul falling backwards passing out and remembered Marko falling off her kitchen counter passing out in the kitchen. She couldn't remember anything else past that.
She sighed knowing they must have left sometime during the day as she walked back to her bathroom to take a quick shower before she went out to hunt. Just as she was making her way towards the bathroom some music began to blast from somewhere in the living room making her stop to search for it.
"Whitesnake is not my ringtone." She said as she walked back into the living room. The song 'This is love' played as she followed it to her couch as she dropped to her knees looking under it as she spotted the smart phone sitting under it. Grabbing it from under her couch she sat there looking at the phone as she read the caller ID.
"Booty call number 47?" she said with a laugh knowing who's phone this was.. "dear God Paul at least put their name in your phone you damn man whore."
She didn't answer as she watched the main lock screen come up as her eyes went wide at the picture on the screen.
"I'M GOING TO FUCKING KILL HIM." She hissed tossing the phone onto the counter to run an get ready. The phone sat on for a moment as a nice picture of her ass was clearly on the screen with his finger reaching for a no no place.