Reoccurring dreams
Blaine's POV.
Dreaming is imagining while asleep a sequence of images that appear involuntarily to the mind of a sleeping person, often a mixture of real and imaginary characters, places, and events. Dreaming about something that is so wrong I can handle ,if it happens once. But it's the reoccurring part that's getting to me. The involuntary reaction my body has to those dreams . The cold sweats I wake up in and wanting almost aching feeling in a certain parts of my anatomy. That I should not be stirred because of who I am dreaming of. But every since she wiggled her way in to my in to my dance number I have been dreaming of…. her. It started off innocent enough her and I sing together. I often get my ideas from routines that I have dreamed about . So I wasn't worried but then the bathroom incident happened and my dreams took a very quick and unwelcoming turn.
Even now I'm ripped from sleep sweating. My breathing heavy my heart rate at a runners pace. I try and control my breath by putting my hand to my chest. As if I can simply will my heart to slow. But my hand has a mind of it own . As it slides over my chest and down my sweat soaked stomach my breathing picks up instead of slowing . My lips fall open my body begging me to let the images of her in my dreams flood back into my mind. To think about the smell of her hair curve of her breasts and her lips. The thought of her lips alone almost make me groan out loud.
"No!….nope." I shake my head and close my hand in to a fist just as my fingers begin to graze the top of my pajama bottoms. I had decided that if I have dreams of her, I simple will just not masturbate. But that has been really ,really hard. because I have been having these dreams all week long. So that means I have gone a whole week or so with out masturbating. You would think oh wow a week with out that big deal. Or hay just do it and get it over with. But I am a teenager, a MALE teenager with raging hormones. So I'm losing my Fuc…..Freaking mind. And I can't just do it. No . why? Because then I'm a hypocrite. I am openly gay and not ashamed . I have said so many times. And I have a wonderful boy friend that I love. So me doing that while thinking about her is just wrong. Beside this is just a phase it will pass it has before it will again. I just have to ride it out …bad choice of words. I just have to get threw this. I jump when my alarm goes off guess its time to stop with the internal mental battle and get ready for school . With all the sweating I have been doing I need a shower . I lift the comforter and look down at myself …..a very, very cold shower. I hop out of bed and jump up and down a few times to try and relax shaking out my arms. I stop and look back down at my self. Nope that didn't work . I sigh and go to my bathroom looking in the mirror my hair is in a mess of curls everywhere.
"Just roll right out of bed and come to school she say" I mumble fingering thru my hair. What wrong with the way I dress it fun and classic just like me. Why am I even thinking about that? After I am done with my very cold shower my lower half is now safely wrapped away under a towel and behaving .I'm my self again. I go in to my closet and pick out my clothing for the day when my phone beeps. I lay across my bed and reach for it on the nightstand with a smile.
2 text messages
One from my mother telling me how wonderful Milan is and how much she and father are enjoying it. And reminding me that Calliope would be off today. So I would have to fin for myself food wise. I quickly responded to her and the rolled on my back and checked the other text.
Good morning sunshine **Kurt**
Good morning love how did u sleep **B.A**
As peaceful as a baby lamb how about u **Kurt**
It was a bit hard . **B.A**
Did I really just send that?
Poor baby bad dreams again? **Kurt**
I Paused and had to think. Are they bad dreams or just confusing dream? I mean my body seemed to really like them. But I not sure that I do or should or …..I have no idea.
Blaine? **Kurt**
Sorry my mom just sent me a text. ** B.A**
So now I'm lying?
Oh ok well c u at school handsome **Kurt**
Ok I love u **B.A**
Not a lie.
Love u 2 ** Kurt**
After I am dressed I open my room door and the wonderful smell of fresh waffle hits my noise. I jog down the stares and find Calliope in the kitchen cooking. I smile easing my bag off my shoulder to sneak up on her silently when I am right behind her I reach my hands out to grab her….
"Ya make to much noise to try and sneak upon on me boy."
She said not turning around.. I smile I loved hearing her voice the thick island accent had way of relaxing me I had heard it all my life.
"I almost had you" I said hugging her from behind picking her up a bit. It had been awhile since I had actually seen her. Even though my clean, neatly fold and hung clothing was evidence she had been here. I find my self home alone a lot because of my parents constant traveling. My parents had me when they were well … older. And not on purpose mind you, I'm the result of too may cocktails at a fund raiser. So unfortunately for me my teenage years fell right in line with their retirement. Which equals me a lone a lot The loneliness was one of the reasons I loved going to Dalton there was always someone around.
"Boy put me down before I run up side ya head with this spatula." she said amusement peppering her tone as I set he on her feet.
She is small in statue but powerful in sprit my mother hired her when she was pregnant with me. My parents may have paid for my schooling but Calliope raised me made me the well rounded person I am to day . If not for her I would have turned out a jaded snob like the rest of the kid that lived around here. She introduced me to music of all kinds. She was the first person I came out to. It was harder for me to tell her then my own parents.
"I thought you were off this week." I said going in to the fridge for orange juice.
"Child I can be off for the rest of my life if I chose I don't have to work you know dat and you know why I come here." she said plating the food . She was right Calliope was by no mean working from check to check she own her own cleaning business and a dress alteration shop she was also co owner of a hair salon she didn't need our money.
"No why do you come here." I said pretending to concentrate she finally turned and gave me a look..
"I just like to hear you say." I gave her a pleading look.
She turned the stove off and came around and hugged me kissing me on the cheek.
"Because I love you like my own….. But when you go to collage I'm out of here." She dropping the accent a bit I laughed my parent are not affectionate people. Most of the times when my mother really held me it was to pose for the pictures that hung all over
the walls . When I came out to them in tears my mother just patted me on the back and said "these thing happen before she left me alone in my room. I shook the memory off and grabbed my bag putting it on my shoulder to head out the door.
"and where are you going? Eat . she spoke to me in Patwa
I'm late I have to go or I will be very late." I responded back in Patwa I knew when she started like this I was in trouble.
She gave me a look and I put my bag down and sat at the bar. She smiled and slid me a plate I began eating quickly.
"Slow down!"
I do as I am told and she was quite for a while.
"Blaine." she said softly I look up and craned my neck back a bit she hardly called me that I was either boy, child, or love.
"Hum?" I looking down at my plate worried. As she leaned in on the counter I knew she was studying me so I kept very still so as not to give any thing away.
"What is vexing you child." she asked
"I don't understand" I looked up at her and plastered a smile on my face.
"Oh? You just spoke perfect Patwa and now you don't understand English? she raised an brow at me. if she didn't know that some thing was wrong with me before she knew for sure now.
"No no I under stand… I" looked back down at my food looking, at her now so I would raise more suspicion.
"…. I'm fine every thing is fine I just have stuff on my mind I'm auditioning for west side story you know. and I not sure of what to sing that all but every thing is fine." I said now looking up at her with a huge smile but her eyes were fixed on my plate I did not know it but I had been stabbing at my food roughly as I spoke to her.
"hum." she said taking the fork slowly away from me. When she turned to the sink I took my chance to escape.
"Bye Cali I said as I was about to leave turning to the door knob.
"she's got you real ties up this on has."
"Hum? no its not a girl. Why would you think it was a girl any I'm….I'm gay and happy" I said sounding a bit to panicked so I relaxed my voice.
"I mean it not like that I really just have a lot going on you know new school homework."
I'm babbling. Why am I babbling? Stop babbling!.
"I just have to find my place in the New Directions it not like the warblers. which I miss but I like them they are all nice. I mean most of them I think Finn might hates me but I'm going to break him with kindness so if I seem wound up she has nothing to do with it. I mean….I" I closed my eyes cursing mentally when I looked at Calliope she just nodded.
"Have a good day Blaine" she said opening the door with sweet smile I stood there for a second my mouth open finger raised in protest. But because of my babbling rant a second a go I snapped my mouth closed nodded and walked out the door.
my cheeks flamed when I heard Calliope's soft laughter be hind me .
I pulled up to the Hummel- Huston house a bit late and I saw Kurt sitting on the porch leg crossed texting away. He looked up smiling at me as he picked up his bag. As he approached the car there was a mischievous glint in his bright blue eyes . I was about to say hi but before I could say any thing he leaned in my window and kissed me. He then pulled back raise a sassy eyebrow at me as he rounding the car and hoping. I looked at him surprised what had gotten into him this morning when he sat down I looked at him eyebrows raised.
"What was that for." I asked smiling
"Brittney."
"I'm sorry ?" I said confused
He laughed and was about to explain but his phone went off he looked at it and smiled then laughed.
Brittney's fondue for two form. she said to kiss the person you love when you see them so warm fuzzy will follow you all day. So I did .And I was about to tell you how smart I think she secretly is. But then she just asked if should put Lord Tubbington on the patch so yeah not so sure what to think now. He said shaking his head as he texted
"Ah I think I like her forum….. although I still don't under stand the cat smoking thing." I frowned trying to figure out who the world was buying the cat the cigarettes .
"None of us does." he said looking at me and laughing. "So bad dream last night?" he asked I opened my mouth but his phone rung and he looked at it.
"It Rachel if I don't answer she'll fill up my in box until I do…. Again."
I nodded thankful I did not have to lie to him about my dreams. The rest of the car ride to school was taken up by Rachel and his talks of the additions. I was left with a quick hug and a good bye. I would not see him again until glee later today. The First half of my classes were all dull most of the thing they talked about I had studied already at Dalton last year. And I wondered if I should see if I could take more advanced classes. I was relaxed my self again until I rounded the corner and saw Santana at her locker frowning. She looked up and locked eyes with me. As I came down the hall she looked over my body my guess she was thinking of jokes to say about my clothing choice later . But the fact that her eyes ran over my body stirred some thing in me. When her eyes came back to my face she frowned again not anger just curiosity. I wondered if the moment of heat I had just felt showed on my face. I quickly smiled at her and Mercedes who from the looks of it was talking to her self because Santana had her eyes fixed on me as I passed.. I fought the nagging urge to look back at her.
"Are you listing to me?" I heard Mercedes almost yell at Santana before I entered the other hall. When I reached my locker I saw Kurt and Brittney talking very excitedly about some thing. They almost jumping up and down it was cute. I thought so, until Brittany leaned in and hugged him closing her eyes and kissing him on the check be for she fluttering away.
Kurt laughed and brought his hand to his check he looked up and say me and al most skipped down the hall to me.
"Guess what!" he said bounce on the balls of his feet the excitement about to burst out of him.
"You're giving Brittany a make over." I asked jokingly
He stopped bouncing for a moment.
"That would me amazing she like a real life size Barbie. but no, no, no." he said waving his hand bouncing again.
"You figured out what you are going to sing for your Tony audition."
"No did that last week my dad already got some one to build my tower for me I go test it tomorrow. he said now bouncing form one foot to the other. I smiled to keep from laugh he really was quite cute when he was excited.
"Tower? wow ok, ok um you um I don't know please tell me." I begged
He bounced a few more times before composed himself.
Ok I'm running for class president ." he said and start bouncing again
"God just think with the west side story lead and a class president win on my application NYADA will be begging me to come to them. He said hugging me.
"Wow really that wonderful." I said smiling and hugged him back.
"What brought this on?"
"Brittney." he smiled
"Really?" I said trying to let it nip at me. I was beginning to think she had a crush on him.
"Oh don't worry you will make a amazing first boyfriend you like the male version of Jackie O. Britt is going to be my campaign manger."
I pulled my lips in and smiled but thought. If I'm Jackie O then he's JFK does that make Brittney his Marilyn Monroe.
.
"I gotta get to class I will see you later enjoy lunch." he said going down the hall.
I shook the thought off and opened my bag to put my book in my locker and get what I need for the rest of the day.
"BLAINE!" I heard my name shouted with such enthusiasm. I jumped a bit and looked up to see Sam Evans standing in front of me which was odd because our conversation are mainly a passing hello and what up. I look at the blond as he held up a comic. A huge smile on his face I had to blink to keep from staring at his mouth.
The incredible Hulk… Wow!" I said trying to sound as excited as he obviously was.
"Vintage incredible Hulk." he corrected and I found my self staring at his lips again how in the world did people focus around him. All I can think about is kissing right now.
I mean I had the same problem when I met Mercedes the first time. She has a beautiful mouth. I looked back at Sam as every word he spoke seemed accentuated because of his full lips. I find my self wondering what a kiss between he and Mercedes looked like. I shook my head a bit. And listen to the blond as he spoke very animatedly.
"This is when they finally got the coloring right. I mean in the 60 he was like grayish but in this one the artist found the color green more vivid and eye catching to readers. Oh and when the writers decided that it was better for him to change not just at dusk like a werewolf but because of anger. I mean pure genus." he smiled still looking in the comic.
I stood there dumb founded how in the world did he know and retain all that when Kurt told me he was dyslexic. I guessed that comic spoke a langue that he understood, comic are not my thing but I need to try and make other friends I was still a new kid, I would have to try to keep him talking. Asking only question that allowed him to talk.
"Wow were did you get it." yeah that's a good start I thought
"Santana." he looking up quickly before going back at comic.
"Santana gave you…. that is your birthday?" I wonder at her unusual act of kindness towards him. They did date and she can be unpredictably sweet.
"Nah birthdays in May and she didn't really give it to me more like threw it down the hall so I would leave her and Mercedes to talk." he said still looking in the book
"Ah I see." I said smiling to myself that sounded a bit more Santana like. I closed my locker and he looked up from the comic at me.
"Hay you have B lunch right." he asked and I nodded.
"You should sit with us I saw you sitting yourself yesterday mike sits with us since Tina has A lunch like Kurt so if you want…."
"Yeah. No that would be awesome total." I said happily at the bro date I had just been invited to.
We walked to the lunch room silently until I spoke up.
"So is Santana is in to comic too?" I ask and then wondered why I had brought her up again I had hoped that it would not raise and suspicion in Sam not that there was any to raise in the first place.
"Um oh no in fact I think she hates them because of me know I would talk her ear off about them until she would tell me to shut the hell up and kiss her." he said
"Hum" I said as we entered the calf
"So you and Mercedes hum. Saw that a mile away." I said He smiled went back to his comic blush touching his cheeks when I mention his girlfriends name
"I think we hid it well for a while."
"Yeah not so much you two almost passed out when you ran in to us at the lima Bean I said as he grabbed a tray he looked at me odd when I did not. Pulled a tea bag out of my bag.
"Hi Mrs. Forbes." I said to the lunch lady.
"Oh hay baby how are you to day."
"Good can I have a cup of hot water please I said flooding my arm on the sneeze guard while I waited.
"Here you go baby." she said handing me a disposable cup with a lid. I popped the lid off and dropped my tea in . I felt eyes on me when I looked up and saw only Sam's green eyes staring at me over a the top of the comic any eyebrow raised.
"I drink tea …every day…plus… I have a bit of a …sore throat …..what?" said trying not to laugh.
"Nothing, nothing…. It just Kind of ….. Friendly…. with the lunch Ladies." He smiled and wiggled his brow. "I mean you smile and they bring you tea . The only thing I get is. Ain't No Mo Meatloaf… just mashed potatoes and corn." He said sounding way to much like Mrs. Forbes. I laughed out loud.
As we go to the table and Mike mumbled something in to his school book. And Brittney looked up at me with a huge smile. Not taking her eyes off me I looked down at my cup. I heard Sam as he spoke more about his comic but I was only half there because I felt eyes on me. I look up and sure enough she was still staring at me I smiled at her and her face if possible brightened more.
"Is some thing on my face?" I said still smiling because she was smiling she shook her head no.
"Hi Blaine."
"Hi Brittney."
"I'm waiting." she informed me resting her head in her hands smiling.
"For?" I laughed a bit
"The magic Kurt said you are magic I just don't want to miss it." she said and I smiled warmly at her.
"I'm not magic." I said ducking my head feeling my cheeks heat up" she looked disappointed and I felt bad.
" yes he is he made Mrs. Forbes nice she gave him tea. He just cant tell you or show you with all theses people around because it's a secret." Sam said not looking up from his comic. And her face lit up and I winked at her and she went back to her plate starting to build something with her food.
I was enjoying my lunch until Santana came not that she is not funny and sweet in her own way. But she decided to tease me with pineapple. I had to quickly excused my self saying a quick good bye to ever one and shooting Santana one last glance. I went to my locker and opened it to grab out a book I forgot. I took a couple of deep breaths bracing my hands in the locker. Thankful I was alone in the hall But then I thought of Santana's lips around the pineapple I groaned out loud. That women is too much. it is fine all I have to do is stay far, far away.
I closed my locker and jumped when I saw HER leaning on the locker behind mine.
"SHI…. Crap." I said closing my eyes
"Did you know that even your groans are musically I wonder what you sound like when you Cu…." I cut her off
"Is there something you want Santana." I asked in a cool tone looking her in the eyes. No mater how much chaos she caused in my body or mind I will keep my voice cool. She smirked wickedly at me maybe that was not to best way to put that.
"What I wanted oh honey I'm afraid if I said that you poor little virgin ear would melt right off your head. I am a little disappointed you almost let that dirty little word slip past those innocent lips of yours. I would have lover to here you say it." She eased closer to me
"Ha I was wondering when I would get to meet this Santana." I had heard a bout her use of sexy to dumbfound people and get what she wants It's all I game to her I'm and not that easy nor am I a push over…..but I cant resist playing this game not l when my opponent believed I was so easy to beat
"What the side is that Warbler." she folded her arms over her chest
"Sex you're using it to play this game of yours but for the life of me I can not figure out why I am your target this time." I said smiling at her no matter what she would not know that her sweet spice smell was driving me up the wall. That I was losing it every time she licked her lip in annoyance. Where are these feeling coming from.
"Is it because of my morals do you have the need you corrupt everything with sex. Just because I don't go and throw sex in peoples face does not mean I am not comfortable with my sexuality ." I said turning to walk away.
"And what is that Blaine? nice speech by the way it was cute bullshit but cute."
"What is what ?"I asked turning back but did not move back toward her
"Your sexuality." she move towards me. "I mean what is it exactly Blaine Gay or Bi…..I just want to know what is it ?" I need her to know that I am no push over.
When she was close enough close enough to me I leaned in so close to her ear I felt my lip brush the shell of her ear as I whispered .
"The same as yours Santana." I pulled back and smiled at her before turning to go down the hall leaving her confused . But if I was being honest so am I.
A.N sorry for the typos
Ok I know it has been a while but….. yeah sorry I'm back and will be posting weekly. Hope to get more readers and I will be putting up another chapter this week to make up. I want to know what you think …..feed back….. I….. need feed back…. To live . LoL thanks for reading
BTW I wrote in Blaine POV which was… different I love writing in Santana speak it is so much easier for me. I liked playing around with Blaine. so which pov would you like to read from next week
Blaine
Santana
Heck maybe some one else.. I'm game.