Chapter 4: Maple Syrup, Croissants, and Earl Grey

Alexander shuffled towards the kitchen, rubbing his eyes tiredly. For some unknown reason, fate decided to be cruel and wake him up at the ungodly hour of eight in the morning. He was still exhausted after last night, but hunger was the only reason he had gotten out of bed. As he walked, he took in his surroundings, excitement started to bubble inside him. Here he was, strolling down the corridors of THE White House, wearing his pajamas and bunny slippers. Sure, the CIA agents everywhere was a little unsettling but he figured he would get used to it. Suddenly he heard a BANG, a man's voice shouting, and a little girl's laugh. Molly!

He started running in the direction of the noises, the smell of burned SOMETHING invading his nostrils. He couldn't let anything happen to Molly! He threw the kitchen doors open, running into the smoky room. "MOLLY! Are you-" He stopped abruptly, nearly slipping on the tiled floor. There was Molly, laughing/coughing on a chair. But there were also three other people in the kitchen, coughing and cursing through the smoke. Three blonde men, and none of them seemed to be the chef. Summoning all of his courage, he ran towards Molly, picked her up and shouted, "Who the hell are you people! One wrong move and I'll… I'll do something really bad!" Oh God, SO lame. But the figures had straightened up, and Alex could just tell that they were powerful men, even though they didn't seem too muscular or anything. He knew fighting them would be his death sentence.

Suddenly the overhead sprinklers went off, clearing the smoke. One of the men spoke, "Bloody hell, how on earth did that happen?" A British guy?"Oui, Angleterre, how you managed to burn water of all zings is beyond me. Clearly, you suck, mon lapin." A FRENCH guy!? "G-Guys, we should really clean up before-" The third blond man turned, and seeing an angry teenage boy holding a laughing Molly squeaked, "Maple!" WHAT THE HECK IS MAPLE!?

The other two turned around at the third guy's "Maple," and Alex's eyebrows shot up in shock. Before he could stop himself, he found himself blurting, "What the heck is wrong with your eyebrows?" There was a moment of shocked silence, the Eyebrow-Guy looking like he was going to start shouting, when there was a stern voice at the doorway that Alex knew all too well.

"What in the world is going on here!?"

Uh oh. Mom.

Everyone turned once again, to see a very angry middle-aged woman donned in a dark blue robe, brown hair held up in a loose bun, glasses glinting angrily in the kitchen light. The sprinklers, as though sensing the woman's anger, immediately shut off. "Mom-"

"Bonjour, Mademoiselle McKinnon. Je suis Fr-"

SLAP

"What have you done to my children." Claire practically snarled, glaring at the shocked Frenchman. She turned to the other two blonde men, who flinched in fear. "And who the hell are you."

Needless to say, Mom was scary when she got mad.

Surprisingly, it was Molly who spoke. Wriggling out of her brother's grasp, she said, "Mommy! Don't be mean to my friends! We were gonna make you a yummy cake!"

WHAT.

"Please, President McKinnon, we are terribly sorry about this rather unorthodox introduction." said Eyebrow-Guy, his British-accented voice echoing around the kitchen. "We had assumed that America would have told you that we would be arriving earlier today. It appears we were mistaken. Bloody git." The British man growled the last sentence out as an after thought.

"Wait." Claire looked at the three men before her. The British man had acidic green eyes, enormous eyebrows, and golden hair. The Frenchman had sparkling azure eyes, a bit of a beard, and wavy light blond hair. The third one's hair was a shade between the British man and the French man's, and was wearing a red sweater with a white maple leaf on the front. He looked a lot like Alfred. Claire let out a sigh of relief, relaxing from her position in front of her children.

"My apologies. You must be England, France, and Canada. America has told me about you. I was only expecting Canada later in the day, but nonetheless this is a pleasant surprise. It is an honor to meet you three, and I do hope we can get along." She held out her hand. The three men stared at her for a moment, before they started to laugh.

"Well! That's a first! How did you know who we were!" said England, stepping forward and shaking Claire's hand. "Your accents, but also your appearance." She smiled fondly at the three men. "America has your hair, Mr. England, Mr. France's eyes, and Mr. Canada's sweater and almost identical features gave it away." "Looks like America has chosen himself an intelligent President." Said England, smiling. "And a woman as well. About bloody time too, I'm sick of getting laughed at when I ask if anyone wants to knit with me."

"Angleterre, don't bore Mademoiselle McKinnon wiz your embarrassing 'obbies," said France, stepping forward and bowing as he kissed Claire's hand. "Oui, je suis France. It is a pleasure to meet you. And don't worry about ze slap, I am unfortunately very used to it." "Oh my goodness, I really am very sorry, it's just-"

"Everyone stop!" They four adults turned to see a bewildered looking Alex. "Mom, what's going on? Why are they calling themselves France, Canada, and England? And why the heck was Molly even with them in the first place!?"

This time it was Canada who spoke. "Well…"

Canada basically said to Alex and Molly what America had told Claire last night, but in simpler terms so they could understand. He then told Claire that they had been planning on surprising her with a cake when Molly had wandered in. While they were chatting, somehow England had managed to burn water, and that was when Alex had burst in.

"Wait, hold up. You guys are countries? Like, the countries?"

"Y-yes."

"Which means, you've been around for, like, ever, right?"

"Oui."

"Which means…" Alex suddenly pointed at England and exclaimed excitedly, "Which means had to have been a PIRATE at one point, right?!"

England looked a bit startled. "I prefer the term privateer, but-"

He was suddenly tackled by the two children, the breath knocked out of him. Then they both started talking rapidly at the same time. Good lord, it was like having two Americas squeezing the life out of him.

"Dude, that's awesome! You're less lame than I thought! Oh my god, did you make people walk the plank?"

"Mister Engwand, do you know Captain Spawwow?"

"-with shotguns and pistols and-"

"-and the pwetty lady wif the sword and-"

"Can't… breath…!"

A minute later, Claire had managed to pry her children off the now wheezing England. They were all seated around the kitchen table, save for France, who insisted that he make them all breakfast.

"Ms. McKinnon, there is another reason we are here besides baking you a cake." said England seriously. "While we are indeed here to establish alliances and what not, and are bosses will be arriving tomorrow, there is a more personal matter we wish to discuss with you. And we would prefer to do it now, before America wakes up."

"I see." Claire turned to Alex. "Alex, why don't you and your sister go take Argon for a walk around the grounds? Harold is currently looking after him right out in the hallway." Alex was about to protest, but immediately stopped when Claire gave him the "Mom Look". "Fine." He said, taking his sister's hand and starting to walk to the door. Molly turned, waving, "Bye, evwyone!" The four adults waved as the door closed.

"So what exactly is this about?"

Canada and England exchanged looks. England started to speak, "Well, we wanted to talk to you about Alfred's current social situation, because heavens know he won't tell you himself. You see, he… well, that is to say…" "Alfred doesn't have many friends." Canada finished, Claire noting the pained look on both their faces. "Sure, it's natural for countries to not get along, but it's different for Alfred. He's the world's super power. But he's also kind of obnoxious and owes certain people a lot of money. Add that with all the war things that are going on… well. It hasn't been easy. Not many countries can keep up with his personality, and he puts up with a lot of hateful things that the other countries say about him, but…" Canada's eyes welled up with tears. England said, "Look, we know that being the current super power of the world has its consequences. You have to sacrifice a lot to get to the top. Hell, I was the super power of the world myself at one point. So I know what America is going through. But unlike him, I was a ruthless bastard, and cut down anyone who blocked my path or even looked at me the wrong way. America isn't like that, and I don't want him to become what I became at one point."

"What Angelterre is trying to say is zat we just want what any ozer parent wants for zeir child." said France, looking at Claire from his position at the stove. "Zat boy is ridiculously strong, in body and spirit, but 'e 'as a delicate 'eart. 'e is sensitive, and cares for ozers much more zan 'e cares for 'imself." France turned off the stove, letting whatever he had made cool. He walked over to Claire, and for the first time the Frenchman looked serious. "Mademoiselle McKinnon, s'il vous plait, take care of our Amérique. Lead 'im down ze right paz, and 'elp 'im prove to ze ozer nations zat 'e is indispensable to zis world."

Clair was stunned. The three countries, no, America's family, we're looking at her with serious and pleading eyes.

"I-"

The kitchen doors burst open. Thee was a blur of red, white and blue and what sounded like the ruffling of feathers as the word "MATTIE~!" echoed around the kitchen.

"Oof!" Canada stumbled a bit as he caught America in his tackle hug, the motion causing them to swing around in a circle. A huge bald eagle flew around the kitchen before settling down on the back of a kitchen chair, titling its head at Claire. What on earth...? "Hey Al." said Canada, smiling at his twin brother. They really looked alike, save for Canada's longer and wavy hair, and purple eyes. He even had glasses. "Bloody hell America, what have I said about bringing that bird into the kitchen! Food is being prepared here you git!" America looked at England over Canada's shoulder. "Hey! Don't be hatin' on Amelia! She's way cooler than your imaginary fairies or whatever! And I bet Mattie brought Hakunamatata or whatever his name is here too!" America's face paled. "Wait. When you said food, d-did you mean…. your food or-" "'Ave no fear Amérique~! Papa France is 'ere! I 'ave cooked your Président and ourselves a delicious breakfast." "Well, it does smell- wait. My President?" He turned to the table, and seemed to notice his rather shocked looking president for the first time. "OH MY GOD! MS. PRESIDENT MCKINNON BOSS CLAIRE! I'M SO SORRY!" He flung himself off Canada towards his President's general direction, straightening his pajamas and bed-head as he started to babble.

"I gotta text late last night about Iggy and Francis coming this morning with Mattie and I was gonna tell you but it was like three in the morning so I set my alarm for six a.m. so I could prepare and stuff before you woke up but it didn't go off and oh god has Iggy cursed you or even worse has Francis molested you or-"

"Alfred, calm down, it's alright." said Claire, laughing. "I have already met… Mattie… Francis… and…. Iggy?" She looked quizzically at England, who blushed. "Erhm, no, my name is not Iggy. That's just what that moron over there calls me for god knows why. My apologies, I completely forgot to give you my human name. My name is Arthur Kirkland." "Je m'appelle Francis Bonnefoy, Mademoiselle." Said France, winking. "I'm Matthew Williams, Ms. McKinnon." said Canada. He was currently on his knees, seeming to be tugging something from under the table they were sitting at. "And this-" he pulled, lifting what looked like a polar bear cub from under the table, "Is Hakunamatata." The polar bear looked up at Canada. "Who are you?" it said in a high-pitched voice. "I'm Canada. Seriously Kamehameha, I've had you for hundreds of years, and you still don't know my name?" "To be fair, mon petit, you don't remember 'is real name eizer. It's Kumajirou, oui?"

Just then, the kitchen door opened, and in came Alex, Molly, and Argon. "Hey guys we-"

"WOOF!"

Everyone looked from the bald eagle, to the polar bear, to the golden retriever.

Uh oh.