A/N: For this chapter, Perfect by Simple Plan and Keep Holding On by Avril Lavigne will be used, but changed a bit. In the story it's meant to be the work of Hermione and Draco! Load up the songs if you want to hear it while reading the story :)
Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoy!
After the "Malfoy Incident", as Hermione decided it would henceforth be known as, she returned to her friends, and, for the rest of the journey, they discussed what the DA meetings would consist of over the next few months. Prior to their arrival at Hogwarts, she let it be known that Malfoy was Head Boy. Everyone, but Harry and Ron, gave her looks of sympathy, while the two boys looked angry. Hermione gave Ginny a fleeting look of confusion, causing Ginny to raise an eyebrow a fraction of a centimeter. She knew something else had happened.
They were now settled in the Great Hall, waiting for the Headmaster to stand and give his usual back-to-school speech. Hermione was seated facing the Slytherin table, and, for a moment, caught a glimpse of a pair of silvery-grey eyes. Malfoy was sitting next to Blaise at the far end of the table, away from the rest of his house, unlike in the Slytherin Prince's usual "throne" at the middle of the table. Draco's eyes held hers for a moment, and she almost fell in to their stormy depths when a hand on her shoulder interrupted her.
"Hermione?" Ginny asked, looking at her with a slightly worried expression.
Jerking out of her daze, she blushed scarlet, and averted her eyes. She turned to Ginny and squeaked, in an unnaturally high voice, "Yes?"
Ginny, who hadn't missed what had just happened, cleared her throat and continued, in a low voice, "You'll tell me what happened on the train, won't you? I'm not as dense as the rest of our mates, I know something went on."
Sighing, Hermione nodded before turning to face the Headmaster, who was now standing at his golden podium.
"Welcome, all, to another year at Hogwarts. As you all know, this year is going to be difficult. One of the many tribulations of being a witch or wizard, is having to deal with some powers that are supernatural. Voldemort," he said, as a shudder ran through the student body, "is strong. That, I will not deny. He is attempting to find more followers, and, by whatever means necessary, intends to win this war. We must all stand together in these dark times, never wavering. Love is more powerful than any magic on this earth," he continued, a twinkle in his blue eyes as he passed over the Gryffindor table, "and hope is essential if we wish to succeed," he paused, looking out at all of the students.
"I'm sure you're all familiar with Sparrow," he started, whispers breaking out throughout the Great Hall, "and this young woman, whomever she may be," he followed, looking directly at Hermione, whose breath started to quicken, "is a perfect example of what we need, and what kind of person we should all aspire to be. Listen to her advice, heed her words. We need her more than most of us may realize," he stated, peering over his half-moon glasses as Hermione's cheeks began to burn.
"Now!" he said, turning to face the room once more, "with that in mind, let us eat."
After the food on the golden platters was vanished, Dumbledore stood once more to ask the Head Boy and Girl to join him at the front of the hall.
"I'll stop by later," Hermione said to her friends, "I have something I need to talk to you all about."
Nodding, Harry, Ron and Ginny walked out of the hall towards the Gryffindor common room.
"Allow me to escort the two of you to your dormitories," Dumbledore said after they had both arrived. They trailed behind him as he walked out of the Great Hall, up numerous staircases, down a number of hallways, until they reached a large portrait of a medieval knight and a lady. Draco and Hermione didn't take notice of each other along the way, save one moment when their hands brushed, causing Draco to look sideways.
"Sir Arthur, Lady Marjory," Dumbledore said, inclining his head.
"Good evening, Headmaster," Lady Marjory replied, a light smile on her fair face.
Turning to the pair, Dumbledore asked, "What would you like your password to be?"
Hermione knew from reading Hogwarts: A History that passwords were chosen by the inhabitants of the room. Racking her brain, she tried to think of an appropriate password.
"What about civility?" Draco suggested, shyly, his eyes looking at his feet.
Giving him a small smile, Hermione nodded at the portrait.
"Of course," Sir Arthur replied, bowing, before the portrait swung open.
Draco's eyes shot up to meet Hermione's, and upon seeing her face, returned her smile, albeit tentatively.
"I bid you both a good evening," Dumbledore said before walking away.
"After you," Draco gestured, allowing Hermione to climb through the portrait hole first. She gasped upon seeing the room.
A fireplace crackled happily on the far right-hand wall of the room. The hardwood floors were a deep, mahogany, and in the sitting area, were covered by a rich, olive green shag rug. The walls, painted a calming, tan color were decorated with silver and gold snakes and lions. A plump, crimson couch faced a rustic, wooden coffee table, as did two forest green chairs. Bookshelves lined the far left-hand walls that led in to a kitchen area. Hermione squealed at the sight of them. Three small sets of stairs led to Draco's room, the shared bathroom, and Hermione's room.
"It's beautiful," Hermione whispered as she continued to look at the room in awe.
"Indeed, it is," he replied, looking around before his eyes stopped on her. She looked to him, and smiled. Clearing his throat, nervously, Draco walked up the left hand set of stairs to see his bedroom. He opened the door, and was shocked to see it wasn't as he had expected.
Draco expected, as he was a Slytherin, the room to be a cave of silvers, greens and blacks. What he did not expect to see was a replica of the bedroom he had always wanted, but was never allowed to have.
The walls were painted a dusky, grey-blue, and contrasted the soft, chocolate brown carpet. On his four-poster bed hung navy blue curtains, that were pulled apart to reveal silky, silver sheets - almost like liquid mercury. A book shelf was set up next to his rough, sandalwood desk, and on his wall was a framed picture of Paolo De Faveri's, one he had seen in a muggle art gallery and wanted, but didn't buy, as his father would have deemed it "muggle filth". It depicted the seacoast of the Cap Corse peninsula near Barcaggio, France. The frothy water, a dark blue-green, met the vibrant purple, orange and yellow hues of the sunset in a beautiful contrast.
He was so happy, he barely noticed the sound of Hermione's footsteps entering her own room.
Hermione opened her bedroom door to find it looked exactly like her childhood room. The walls were a light peach color, paired with a sandy brown colored carpet. Her bedding was soft, cream cotton, and her pillows were light pink and coral. On her walls were pictures of her favorite musicians, both muggle and magical, and her bookcase was twice as full as it was in her old home, much to her delight.
As she sat, basking happily in the aura of her room, she remembered she had promised her friends she would meet them in the Gryffindor common room. Shooting up, she ran towards the portrait hole.
Hearing a slight commotion, Draco, too, flew to his door. Pulling it open, he saw her running and, in the heat of the moment, yelled, "Hermione!"
She stopped and turned around, a questioning look on her face.
"Yes?" she asked
"Oh! Er… I…" he started, not actually thinking she would stop… his hand rubbed the back of his head and realized he didn't know what he wanted to say.
Smiling a little, she walked towards him, placing a hand on his shoulder. He tensed slightly, not knowing what to expect, before she said in a quiet voice, "I'm willing to work on this civil thing if you are."
Relaxing a little, he looked down at her, silver meeting brown.
"I'm truly sorry," he started in a small voice, "for everything I've done to you… and your friends… I-"
She stopped him, placing a small hand on his lips. "Your behavior will prove to me how sorry you are. It's okay. We'll work on it… Draco," she finished, before giving him a small smile and turning to leave the common room. He caught a glimpse of her long, brown curly flying behind her before she was gone. He placed a hand on his tingling lips where she had touched him, a smile creeping to his face. Maybe things will be okay…
After Hermione finally arrived in the Gryffindor common room, she pulled Ginny, Harry and Ron with her to the room of requirement – they needed a safe space to talk. Hermione proceeded to tell them all about what happened on the train, from Malf- Draco's behavior, to their fight, to his outburst, to his apology. All three of them sat, not saying a word, before Ron scoffed, "You actually believe him?"
Frowning slightly, Hermione replied, "Yes, Ronald, I do. I know perfectly well the horrible things he's done to us in the past, but I'd never seen him be more genuine."
Giving a derisive laugh, he rolled his eyes before turning to look at Harry.
"She's right, you know," Ginny continued. "He's been acting differently. Take this evening as an example. I bumped in to Malfoy before entering the Great Hall, and he simply apologized before moving out of the way. Didn't call me "Weaselette" or anything."
"Well, maybe he's suffered a head injury," Ron huffed, crossing his arms.
Hermione turned to Harry to give him a pleading look, and he sighed.
"Hermione," he began, choosing his words carefully. "I will give him the benefit of the doubt," he said, holding his hand up when Ron made a noise of outrage. "Because I trust your judgment. It's never too late for people to change – Ron, stop shaking your head at me! – AS I was saying, it's never too late for people to change, and if Malfoy's actions show that he's a different person, so be it. Who am I to deny him that?"
"You're Harry Potter!" Ron seethed. "You've had a problem with Malfoy since first year! He's been horrible to us! Bloody hell, you're the one about to destroy the one thing his own bloody father stands for!"
"Ronald Weasley!" Ginny scolded, frowning. "Draco Malfoy is not his father. As you are not yours, nor are you your brothers! If we all thought the way you are thinking right now, we wouldn't get anywhere. Imagine what your life would be like if people kept expecting you to be like Fred and George? Or Bill? Or Charlie?" she continued, her nostrils flaring. "And you just said so yourself, Harry is out to destroy the one thing his father stands for. Not him, his father. So get your head out of your arse, and trust Hermione's judgment. As much as I may still be hesitant about Malfoy's "change", stop being so narrow-minded!"
Ron looked at Ginny, then Harry and finally, Hermione. Sighing, he accepted his defeat.
"Fine," he said defiantly, "I'll give him a chance. But if he hurts you in any way, and I mean any way, and not only you! If he hurts Harry, or Ginny, or me, I will tear him to fucking pieces."
Smiling, Hermione stood up to hug her friends tightly. "Thank you for trusting me with this," she whispered. "I have a good feeling about it."
Releasing them, she then turned to Ginny. "Ready?"
Harry and Ron looked at each other questioningly. "For what?" they asked simultaneously.
Giving them each a sly smile, Ginny responded, "Just listen to the WWW," as she pushed them out of the room.
Back in the Head's common room, Draco was sitting and talking with Blaise, his best mate.
"And she just accepted it?" Blaise asked, his dark eyes full of surprise.
"Yeah," Draco replied, a hint of a smile ghosting around his lips. "She was always a forgiving person, I just-"
"You just never figured you would be one to be forgiven?" Blaise finished. Draco nodded.
"Well," Blaise continued. "At least now you can work towards a brighter future… Have you said anything to your father yet?"
Draco paled a little at the mention of Lucius, "No… I… I can't tell him."
"You have to, Draco."
"I know, and I want to, but… he'll…"
Blaise's brow furrowed, "Is he still doing that to you?"
Draco's silence answered his question. Sighing, Blaise clapped a hand on his shoulder and said, "Listen, mate, just tell him you don't want to follow in his bloody footsteps. He's fucked your life up enough as it is; this is your last chance to finally get what you want. My family can help you, Dumbledore can help you, hell, now, even Granger can-"
"Hermione," he interjected.
"Huh? Oh, er, right. Now even Hermione can try to help you," he said. "Just… get out before it's too late."
"Yeah…" Draco nodded, slowly.
Sighing again, Blaise looked at his broken friend, wishing he could do something to help him. He decided, for now, Draco needed time to mull over his thoughts alone.
"Alright, mate," Blaise said, standing up. "I gotta get back to the common room… Don't want anyone messing with the first years on their first day."
Draco stood up to look at his friend, a tired smile on his face. "Thanks for everything, mate, don't know what I'd do without you."
"You'd die."
Chuckling, Draco gave him a quick hug and said, "Now get the hell out of here."
Blaise grinned and climbed through the portrait hole, the door swinging shut behind him.
Draco rubbed his eyes and turned to enter the bathroom when the small, orange radio caught his eye. Revolving on the spot, he entered his bedroom and clicked the radio on.
He had stolen the radio from his father, not knowing, at the time, what it was for. Lucius Malfoy had taken it off of the body of an auror he had killed at the ministry and brought it home, thinking it was something of great value. Little did he know that it was, however, he never had the patience to take the time to analyze it. Draco sat in his room for hours that summer with the little radio, until he found what he had been looking for – the underground broadcast of the light side.
Ever since that day, it had become a quotidian routine to tune in and hear about what was happening with the war. One night when he was feeling particularly lost, he turned on the radio to hear the voice of a young woman… Sparrow, she called herself. Since that night, she had become the candle in his window, and his desire to be a better person flourished.
This evening was no different. The radio crackled to life and he heard Raptor – or was it Rapier? – talking about something new.
"-sure you've all heard from Sparrow, on our station. She's serving as a great inspiration to all of us during this dark time, and now we have a message for the rest of you music lovers that want to share your songs with us."
"That's right, Raptor, every Wednesday, wizards and witches alike may come perform music they have written. On the bottom of your WWW radios, you will receive information about where to go and when. These radios must be on your person upon entry, and wands will be taken at the door. All music will be broadcasted that night to those who are at home."
"It's a first come first serve rule, so make sure you get there early if you want to perform."
"We look forward to hearing you all."
"And now, a message from our beloved Sparrow."
There was a moment of silence in which he could only hear his own breathing, and then, she came on.
"Hello, everyone. I do hope you all will consider performing on Wednesday. Like I've said many times before, music is a universal language, and it doesn't help only the listeners, but the performers as well," she paused, clearing her throat. "This evening, I have a friend with me – Lynx. This song we will be performing tonight was written by both of us… We hope you enjoy it."
Back in the Gryffindor common room, all the students sat with bated breath waiting for the song to begin. Harry and Ron sat closest to the radio, eyes wide as they waited for their friends to begin singing.
A mix of guitar and strings, and then Hermione began to sing...
"You're not alone, together we stand
I'll be by your side you know I'll take your hand.
And when it gets cold, and it feels like the end
There's no place to go, you know I won't give in"
Harry and Ron smiled, listening to their best friend, her stubbornness and verve showing, even through her lyrics.
"No, I won't give in…
Keep holding on," Ginny joined in.
"'Cause you know we'll make it through," sang Hermione
"We'll make it through," Ginny echoed.
"Just stay strong," the duo sang.
"'Cause you know I'm here for you"
"I'm here for you"
"There's nothing you could say," Hermione belted
"Nothing you could say"
"Nothing you could do"
"Nothing you could do"
"There's no other way when it comes to the truth
So, keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through"
"We'll make it through"
Lavender gave a watery smile to Ron as he pulled her in to his lap, hugging her. Seamus and Dean stood, their arms clapped around each other's shoulders, each with a Patil twin on their other side.
"So far away," Ginny sang
"I wish you were here,
Before it's too late this could all disappear"
"Before the doors close," Hermione entered in perfect harmony
"And it comes to an end"
"With you by my side I will fight and defend," Ginny finished, powerfully.
"I'll fight and defend"
"Keep holding on, 'cause you know we'll make it through," Hermione returned.
"We'll make it through"
"Just stay strong
'Cause you know I'm here for you"
"I'm here for you"
"There's nothing you could say"
"Nothing you could say"
"Nothing you could do"
"Nothing you could do"
"There's no other way when it comes to the truth
So, keep holding on"
"'Cause you know we'll make it through
We'll make it through…" the two finished, fading out.
The air in the Gryffindor common room seemed clearer, brighter. All the lion-hearted students looked at each other, their energy restored, and hugs were passed around before they all headed up to their dormitories.
Draco sat on his bed as the duo finished singing. His heart felt lighter, and he decided, then, that his big change would start with Wednesday evening. He transfigured an old bit of parchment in to a guitar and, pulling a capo out of his trunk, proceeded to write a song based on what he wanted with his life… and what he was feeling at that very moment.
He had written music before, but most of it was… for lack of a better word, depressing. He had no inspiration in his life, and much of his music revolved around sadness. In order to warm up his fingers and voice, he began playing a song he had written when he was 14.
He started strumming his guitar gently, before becoming more intense.
At that moment, Hermione walked quietly through the portrait hole, not wanting to disturb Draco. She pattered over to her bedroom door when she heard him clear his throat and start to sing.
"Hey, Dad, look at me.
Think back and talk to me,
Did I grow up according to plan?
And do you think I'm wasting my time,
Doing things I want to do?
But it hurts when you disapproved all along.
And now I try hard to make it, I just want to make you proud…
I'm never gonna be good enough for you,
I can't pretend that I'm all right…
And you can't change me!
'Cause we lost it all, nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry, I can't be perfect.
Now it's just too late, and we can't go back
I'm sorry, I can't be perfect…"
Hearing the rawness and sadness in his voice, Hermione's eyes began to fill with tears. She knew this was a song he wrote. Part of her wanted to walk in to his room and hold him in her arms, but another part of her wanted to hear the rest of the song… the latter half won, and so she continued to stand, listening.
"I try not to think, about the pain I feel inside,
did you know you used to be my hero?
All the days you spent with me, now seem so far away,
And it feels like you don't care anymore.
And now I try hard to make it, I just want to make you proud…
I'm never gonna be good enough for you,
I can't stand another fight…
But nothing's all right
'Cause we lost it all, nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry, I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late, and we can't go back
I'm sorry, I can't be perfect
Nothing's going to change the things that you said.
Nothing's going to make this right again.
Please don't turn your back-
I can't believe it's hard just to talk to you,
But you don't understand…"
His voice broke, and he felt tears threatening to spill from his eyes. Grabbing his sleeve, he roughly pressed his fist against his face, stemming the flow of his tears. He growled and forced himself to stop crying. Breathing heavily, he locked his door and turned out his light. Deciding he needed time to calm down and that he would begin his new song tomorrow, he threw himself on his bed, face buried in his pillow.
Hermione, face now streaming with tears, still hadn't moved from her spot by his door. She couldn't believe what she had just heard, as it was so unlike the Draco Malfoy she had known. It was then that she felt and understood his pain for the first time. Quietly, she tiptoed in to her bedroom and shut the door. She lay on her bed, face red, and drifted in to a fitful sleep.