Chapter 4
Severus and Hermione soon fell into a pattern that was comfortable for them. Each morning he picked her up from her rooms at eight a.m. for breakfast. Then, much to his students' delight, he'd dismiss class early so that he could arrive at Hermione's classroom before she had a chance to 'escape' and escort her to lunch. She always had a nap after lunch, taught her two afternoon classes, and then worked in her office until dinner.
A Muggleborn seventh year named Lettice helped her grade essays or gather books from the library for Hermione's research and class preparation. Minerva had waylaid the girl, after she had been selected, and had given her stern directions to not allow Hermione to skive off dinner. Lettice was to keep her in the office under any contrivance possible until Professor Snape arrived. If Hermione took points off as a result, they would be restored by the headmistress herself.
Another habit the pair fell into was a small walk each night after dinner. Ostensibly it was for Hermione's benefit; the regular exercise helped keep her diabetes under control and helped to keep excessive weight off. She had told Severus she had begun to do yoga exercises in the privacy of her room as well, and he was encouraged that she was taking care of herself.
Over time, the two unlikely colleagues began to learn a bit more about each other and break through the walls that six years as teacher and student had built. Neither realised that the other was beginning to feel the pangs of something other than friendship.
Hermione could have assumed her feelings were the aftermath of having broken up with Jani. Add the emotional upheaval she was experiencing thanks to her body's overproduction of hormones and you had a woman who at one moment was weeping over the loss of love and in another furiously frigging herself to achieve some sort of sexual satisfaction. However, if she had to face her feelings head on, as she usually did, she would have to admit that she had begun to feel something for the man who walked beside her four or five times per day. She scolded herself for the thought; the taciturn man would never find a former student—especially one that had annoyed him to no end—desirable.
Away from students, he was really rather pleasant. He admitted to her that their interaction on her first day had been quite eye opening for him, and he had had to accept that this was no longer the bushy haired, buck toothed student of the past, standing knee to knee in front of him, but a confidant and grown woman.
Severus was unsure what he felt. He had always thought he clearly knew his own mind and his place in the world prior to her arrival at the school as a teacher. His role had changed in the post war environment, and he had taken the best part of a year to accept that. He thought long and hard about how he fit into life now. He was not hated, but nor was he overtly welcomed into society circles, and that was fine with him. He simply wanted to stay at Hogwarts. It was his home after all was said and done. Here he had a few friends with which to spend his time with, and the odd Order meeting provided him with all the social contact he desired. He was content; the regimen of school life and teaching Potions were, if not soothing, then at least regular and less stressful. On occasion, he had even entertained the idea of finding a companion. If a witch came into his life, one that he would be well matched with, then perhaps he could make a go at marriage or at least a committed relationship. Hermione was surprisingly a good match, now he thought of it. Too bad she'd never see him as a possible suitor.
He was unaware that he'd have to face his feelings sooner rather than later as he made his way to pick Hermione up for breakfast.
December had just begun, and the halls were freezing as he quickly made his way to Hermione's rooms. Every morning he followed the same routine; he would knock at her door, and it would be opened by Hermione, smiling at him and eagerly stating she was ready to go. They'd walk briskly to the Great Hall—or they had until last week when Hermione admitted that her hips were sore these days and could he please slow his pace down—where he'd pull out her chair and then take his own, a few seats away. When they were finished, he'd escort her to her first class and then again to lunch and dinner. After that, they put on their cloaks and headed outdoors for a walk. They had no set course, just as far and as long as Hermione could tolerate. They'd chat about all manner of subjects from school problems to the latest novels they'd been reading. The pattern repeated in comforting regularity.
Today however, there was no answer to his first knock, so he knocked again. Where is she? he wondered. Where is her elf? Carefully, he tried the doorknob. It turned in his hand, and the door opened. Clearly Hermione was expecting him, so why didn't she answer the door? Why were her wards down? Was she injured and unable to call for help?
Not finding her in the sitting room, he walked quickly toward her bedroom. The door was ajar and as he looked in, there was Hermione, standing in her white nightgown by the window, coughing and wiping her nose. She turned slightly to reach for a clean tissue on the table and that's when Severus was overwhelmed by what he saw.
The sun was shining through the window and shone right through Hermione's gown. It silhouetted her body, and Severus was certain he had never seen anything so beautiful in his life. Not even the most beguiling of potions ensnared his senses quite like the woman before him. Her belly protruded from her body, and her navel could be seen slightly poking out. A brief and rather silly thought flashed through his mind; did she have an outie or an inny to begin with? Her breasts hung freely and swayed heavily side to side as she moved.
Hermione was life personified. She was Madonna with her child. In that moment, Severus knew what he felt for her, and he was no longer confused or upset. This was the witch he had been waiting for. His gasp of realisation caught her attention.
"Oh, Seberus!" she squeaked. "I did'n hear you!" I hab a cold, I think. I don't wand to go to breagfast."
Severus smiled. She did sound rather cute with her stuffy nose. "I can see that, Hermione. Would you like me to call Poppy?"
"Erm, probadly," she said and then sneezed rather messily.
"Get into bed this instant," Severus ordered. "I shall call for your breakfast and then Floo Poppy."
Without thought, he stepped toward Hermione's bed as she slipped back under the blankets. He positioned the pillows for her and tidied the sheet and duvet.
"Dank you," she whispered. "My throad is so sore!"
"Some warm tea and runny porridge will help. I'll be back in a moment." He walked out of the room, dizzy with emotion. From this moment on, he determined, this was the witch for him, and he would begin to court her, subtly at first in order to gauge her reaction. When the time was right, he would make his feelings known. He could only hope those feelings would be returned.
He returned to Hermione's bedroom, Polly following behind, mumbling fussily. The elf set a tray on a table and went to Hermione.
"Yous should have called for Polly, Missy Hermione," she scolded gently. "I be heres in an instant, you know that."
"I'm sorry, Poddy," Hermione said, breathing a little heavily due to her cold. "I am a bid swimmy headed and not tinkding."
"Nursey lady coming, I think; Potions man has told me. He is also telling Polly to bring tea and runny porridge."
"Thank you, Poddy. Did you bringd enough for Seberus?"
"I adds some foods for him," said Polly. "Do yous wants anything else?"
Severus answered for her. "Please make sure Hermione has plenty to drink today, Polly. Some lemon water and hot tea, I think. Maybe a plate of biscuits and fruit too, in case she gets hungry between meals."
"Yes, sir." Polly bowed and then blinked away from the room.
"Poppy will be round after breakfast," Severus told Hermione. He reached for the tea and added a lemon, and then handed her the cup. She looked at it with a frown. "No milk today, young lady. It will make your cough worse. The lemon will help cut the mucous in your throat so when you do cough, it won't be so hard."
"Thank you, Seberus. Won't you sit and eat? I'd be happy to have you, eben if I don't feel like talkindg."
"I will join you, and you don't have to talk. It will be a relief not to hear you chattering away"
Hermione was about to rebuke him, when she saw the smirk on his face. She smiled and laughed, but it turned into a hacking cough, and she quickly set the cup down before she spilled it on the bed.
As the couple ate, they read from a copy of the Daily Prophet, which Polly had provided each of them. When they were finished, Severus tidied up the tray and called for the elf. Polly had just popped away with the empty plates when Poppy came into the bedroom.
"Ah, Hermione dear; Severus says you have a cold. Let's take a look." A few wand motions later, the runes dancing above Hermione's head showed that she had a low grade fever and the start of sinus infection. Another motion of her wand and the room filled with the baby's heartbeat.
"Aye, that's a bonny sound, isn't it?" Poppy asked. "It's strong and steady, as it should be." She cancelled the spell. "Severus has the right of it, I think. Stay in bed, plenty of rest and fluids. I'll have him make you a bit of the Pepper-up for pregnant women, which should put you to rights in a day or two. I'm afraid you'll have to cancel your classes for a bit. With your diabetes, it'll be tougher to run the course of your cold as usual."
"What arrangements can I make for your classes, Hermione?" asked Severus.
With a tired wave of her wand, a parchment flew into the room. Severus grabbed it and skimmed what she had written. "Ah," he remarked, "you really have planned for all contingencies, haven't you?"
Hermione nodded.
"Very well," he said, "I'll go find Minerva, and we'll take care of things for a few days. You get well. May I check on you later?"
Hermione whispered, "Yes, that would be lubly. I tindk I'll have a nap now." Severus left the room as Poppy helped Hermione settle down to sleep.
"I'll be back this evening to check on you, my dear. I daresay you'll have a certain gentleman and elf taking excellent care of you," Poppy laughed.
Hermione smiled. "I know. Seberus is wonderful, isn't he?"
"That he is. Deep down he is a very caring man."
"I could get used to that," Hermione said sleepily, "very used to that. See you later Poppy."
Poppy was certain the young woman was asleep before she closed the door to her quarters. With a smile on her face, she hurried off to find Minerva. It seemed that things were about to change at Hogwarts between their two youngest Professors, and Minerva would certainly want to watch that!
In a few days, Hermione was well enough again to resume teaching. The only lingering effect was the fact she tired more easily. Poppy was concerned, so sent her to St. Mungo's for a more thorough exam. Severus was asked to accompany her, and he acquiesced with only a few grumbles.
As the pair walked down to the gates in order to clear the wards so they could Apparate, Hermione asked, "Severus, after my appointment is finished, would you mind if we went to Diagon Alley? I still need to find a few Christmas gifts."
"That should not be a problem. I have a few ingredients I needed to pick up at the apothecary as well as some personal shopping. We could eat lunch after, if you're willing?" he asked hesitantly.
"That would be wonderful. It makes a nice change from the Great Hall."
"Why isn't your mother accompanying you?" Severus asked as they walked. "I could have Apparated you to the Leaky so you and she could meet."
"Mum and Dad are at a symposium this week; something to do with continuing education for their licenses. I'll visit them over Christmas break."
They arrived at the Apparition point, and Severus turned to Hermione. "Side along?" Severus intimated by holding out his arms. "If you close your eyes, you may not be as nauseous."
Hermione stepped into his embrace and stood as closely as she could. At that moment, the baby gave a hearty thump and startled them both.
"What was that?" Severus asked.
Hermione laughed as she stepped slightly away. "That was my child. He or she was probably protesting to being slightly squashed." She looked up into Severus' eyes. "You felt that?"
"Yes, I did. Strong little lion in there," he said as he playfully poked her belly.
Hermione slapped at his hand. "No poking the pregnant belly. I get enough of that from the female staff at Hogwarts."
Severus looked slightly ashamed. "I apologise, Hermione. I didn't mean to offend you."
"I'm not upset at you. It's actually quite surreal to have you, of all people, doing that. No, please don't worry about it. Although in future, if you'd like to feel the baby or something, please ask."
"Very well," said Severus. "Shall we try this again?"
With a laugh and a smile, Hermione stepped into his arms. This time, the baby seemed to not mind, and Severus whirled them away.
The baby really minded the Apparition, however, and Hermione vomited upon landing. She was mortified and began to cry. "Oh, Severus," she sobbed. "I'm so sorry; all over your boots. I promise to have them professionally cleaned."
Severus' nose wrinkled at the smell, but with a few quick Evanescos and a Deodorising charm, the two of them were neat and tidy in no time.
"I'll not hear of it," said Severus as he cast another spell and then reached into his pocket. "I think pregnancy has affected your brain and you've forgotten you're a witch, silly woman. Here, take these."
Hermione looked up to see a handkerchief in his one hand and a glass of water in the other. She took the water gratefully, swished it around her mouth and then spit it out. She then took a cleansing swallow and wiped her lips on the cloth Severus had given her.
Once Hermione felt less nauseous, they made their way to the main entrance of the hospital. She was quickly checked in, and Severus found them seats. He pulled a Potions journal from his voluminous robes and began to read.
From the corner of her eye, Hermione watched Severus. He was not really reading the journal, but looking at the other pregnant women sitting nearby and those moving around the waiting room. It took everything within her not to laugh out loud as she watched his eyebrows go up and down, his eyes widen, and his mouth thin into a straight line.
"Severus," she asked, choking back a laugh, "is this the first time you've ever been around pregnant women, aside from me?"
"Erm, no, why do you ask?"
Hermione began to giggle helplessly. "Because I've been watching you, and you really don't know what you want to think! I saw your reaction when that woman, who is pregnant with twins—we met at my first prenatal appointment—waddled out of the hall leading to the exam rooms. I thought your eyes were going to bulge right out of your head!"
Severus looked discomfited that he'd been caught 'gawking' so to speak. "I have seen pregnant women before, Hermione, just…not so many all herded together in one spot. It is really rather hard to comprehend a woman's body can stretch to such…proportions in order to accommodate a child." He pointed to the woman with twins. "You won't get that big will you? You'd tip straight onto your face if you did!"
"No, you git! And I'll thank you to not refer to us, even obliquely, as cows." Hermione said primly, giving his arm a whack. "I'll get bigger yes, but she's having twins."
Before she could go further, an assistant called her name. "I'll be back in about thirty minutes. It's only a quick exam," Hermione said quietly.
"I shall read my journal," said Severus, holding up the book in his hand.
Hermione nodded and headed off. Twenty minutes had passed when an assistant called out, "Mr. Snape?"
Severus stood immediately and went to the woman. "Yes? Is Miss Granger all right? Is there something the matter?"
The assistant smiled. "No, sir; Miss Granger wanted you to be with her for this part of the exam. She will explain why. Come this way, won't you?" She gestured with her hand toward the end of the hall.
They entered a dimly lit room where he saw Hermione lying on a table.
"Are you all right, Hermione?"
"Yes, I am. This is my healer, Samantha Ainsworth. She said it would be okay if you were with me for this."
Severus nodded and shook hands with the healer. "With you for what? Are you going to have some sort of procedure?"
"Healer Ainsworth is concerned about the size of the baby and me."
At this point, the healer spoke. "It's not uncommon for women with gestational diabetes to carry more fluid in the amniotic sac. This can cause a woman to look as though she is carrying more than one baby, which is not the case with Hermione, but more seriously, impede her ability to breathe properly secondary to the organs pushing up into the diaphragm. I want to monitor Hermione's uterus and take a few measurements as well."
"Why do I need to be here then?" asked Severus.
"Let me just step out a moment," Samantha said. "Just call when you're ready, Hermione."
When the door snicked closed, Hermione said, "Severus you are my friend, and I'm about to see my baby for the first time. I was still unconscious when they did the ultrasound in November. You've helped me feel not quite so alone during all this, and I wanted to share this moment with a friend…with you," she finished shyly.
"I don't know what to say," he replied hesitantly. "Are you sure about this? I'll need to see you rather intimately, won't I? I don't think we're that friendly."
Hermione chuckled. "They can put a screen up if seeing my rather large tummy would bother you, but that's all you'd see. They use a special wand to run over my stomach that sends the images to that machine over there." She pointed to a large machine in the corner. "The monitor right here," she pointed to a small unit closer to them, "will also show us the images. Please, Severus," she took his hand in hers, "please stay with me and share this. It would mean a great deal to me."
Severus looked at their hands. They looked strange together; his worn, scarred larger hand held in her soft, ink stained, much smaller one. He could even see tiny puncture marks on her fingertips from where she checked her blood glucose. It was an easy decision, really, he thought. This was the woman he wanted for the rest of his life, but he needed to be careful not to let his emotions run away with him in case she did not feel the same way. However, her declaration that she considered him her friend right now was making it hard not to tell her how he felt.
"If it means that much to you, Hermione, I'd be honoured to share this with you."
A tear slipped down her cheek. "Oh, thank you, Severus. Won't you ask Samantha to come in now?"
There was a bustle of activity once the healer returned. Severus was given a chair to sit in near Hermione's' head. Machines were positioned, and Hermione was draped with a light sheet under which she opened her robes. Once the Healer was in position, she pushed the sheet up, exposing Hermione's stomach. Using her wand, she magicked some gel onto her skin and then set the wand into the gel and began to move it.
Immediately the room filled with the sound of the baby's heartbeat and some of Hermione's digestive noises. Had the room been brighter, they would have seen Hermione's face burn red.
Severus was riveted to the monitor that was near to them. Fluttering around within a rather odd shaped sac was Hermione's child at sixth months' gestation. The baby was perfectly formed. He could see, though the image was not completely clear, hands whose fingers wiggled, opening and closing as though the child was waving at them. The head was quite a bit larger than the rest of the body, which was normal, the healer told them. A tiny ear was noticeable as were the eyes, over which the eyelids could be seen. The babe's legs were curled tightly against its tummy, so they were unable to see distinctly the sex of the baby. The healer said she could attempt to move the baby by agitating Hermione's stomach, but Hermione said she didn't want to know the sex. Occasionally, an arm or a leg would kick out and Hermione would ooh and aah with delight.
Severus looked away from the image to Hermione's midsection. He couldn't get the vision of her from that day when he found her sick in her room out of his mind. It was magic; it was a miracle that the image of the child on the screen was actually within her. That her body was expanding, nurturing, and protecting a living being even as they watched was magnificent. In that moment, he admired her and to a lesser degree all women who endured the joys of pregnancies. He knew from experience that all pregnancies were not perfect; some ended in heartache, but for right now, he was only thinking of Hermione's joy.
Hermione's reaction to the ultrasound was much the same as Severus' only more vocal. She laughed and chattered away with the Healer as various parts of the baby were pointed out and made clear.
Toward the end of the exam, the healer asked, "Would you like a picture?"
"Oh yes," Hermione said. "Please!"
With the click of a few buttons, a picture was produced and the exam ended. The lights got brighter, causing them all to blink a moment.
"Hermione, here's a cloth; go ahead and wipe your belly off and then come into my office. I'll go over the results of my measurements with you." The Healer left the room while Hermione cleaned herself off, and Severus helped her sit up and then stand.
"I'll just go to the reception area and see you in a bit," Severus said.
"Oh, no. Come with me into the Healer's office. Just in case something's…well you know."
"From the Healer's reactions, I doubt anything is wrong, Hermione."
"Please?" She looked up at him. "You may as well after all."
"Very well," he sighed. She was wrapping herself around his finger and she didn't even know it.
Once seated in the Healer's office, she got right to the point. "Everything looks fine as far as the baby's development, Hermione. Its head is well within the parameters we'd expect at this gestational age, and at this point, you should be able to deliver naturally, even with the size of your pelvis. You're doing a great job controlling your diabetes. As we suspected, you do have quite a bit more fluid than normal, but this is not detrimental to the baby. You will, however, experience more difficulty breathing and because of this, you'll tire more quickly."
"Does this mean I need to go on bed rest or anything?"
"No. However, you should limit your activity. Is there a way your classroom could be moved so that you didn't need to walk so far from your quarters? Could you take all of your meals in your room? I'm not saying you need to completely restrict your activities, but we all know Hogwarts; you can't go from the Great Hall to classrooms without going up or down several stair cases. If you could stay on one floor, that'd be best. I know you said you walk for exercise and do yoga. I want you to continue doing that, but do not go beyond your ability to breathe as naturally as possible."
Hermione looked a bit frightened, but said, "I believe accommodations could be made. Severus?"
"The headmistress will certainly accommodate you. Your students would be only too happy to as well. You have a devoted house elf that will also take care of you."
The healer stood. "Well, then things should be no problem! I want to see you again in two months so that we can do some more measurements. If all is well at that time, I'll leave you in the capable hands of Poppy Pomfrey. I know her well, and she will be able to deliver you naturally with no trouble at all. However, if anything happens, there are provisions in place to get you to St. Mungo's instantly. I'll send my findings to Poppy as soon as I've charted them." She shook hands with both of them. "Have a good day, Hermione, Mr. Snape."
They were in the road outside St. Mungo's in a moment when Hermione declared, "I'm famished. What say we eat first and then shop?"
"All right. Are you craving anything in particular?"
"Yes, as a matter of fact. A good juicy steak and chips. And a milkshake. Chocolate."
"Not fussy at all, are you?" Severus smirked.
Hermione laughed. "I know just the place; we'll need to transfigure our cloaks though. It's in Muggle London, not far from the British Museum."
"Lead the way, my dear, but carefully!" Severus admonished Hermione who had begun to waddle quickly along the sidewalk.
"Severus, I'm fine right now. Let's take advantage of my ability to be fine, shall we?"
"I'm just trying to help," he said.
Hermione turned to look at him. "I know, and I truly appreciate it." She placed a hand along his jaw. "You are a good friend, Severus Snape. I hope you know that."
Severus blushed slightly and put his hand up to hold the one caressing his jaw. "I hope that I will not fail you as a friend."
"Only if you keep poking my belly," Hermione laughed. Taking his hand in hers, she pulled him along. "We need to find an alley to Disapparate from. I hope I don't vomit again."
"I am prepared should that happen."
Severus escorted a very tired Hermione back Hogwarts shortly before dinner that evening. He helped her to her quarters where he called for her elf to bring her a light supper and tuck her into bed.
"Thank you so much, Severus, for everything today," Hermione said, punctuating her tiredness with a large yawn.
"You are most welcome, Hermione," Severus replied. "Eat your dinner and then get some sleep. I will see you in the morning for breakfast."
"Are you going to see Minerva about the changes Healer Ainsworth recommended?"
"I am sure Poppy will have gotten your report and discussed it with Minerva, but I will stop by her office briefly and check. I'll let you know in the morning."
"Good night, Severus."
"Good night, Hermione."
He turned and left her bedroom, quietly walking through her quarters. He noticed her cloak and the pile of packages she had dropped on the sofa as soon as she had entered the room. They reminded him of the item he had bought for her, now lying heavily in a pocket of his robes. He hoped she would like it.
A/N: I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes while pregnant with my son, although I did not require insulin. I did, however require an emergency C-section; you'll just have to read the next chapter to find out if Hermione does or not. Hermione's experience here mirrors mine, with a few adjustments for dramatic effect. If you have GD, please be sure to follow your doctor's orders to safeguard your health.
