On the jet

Sam's POV:

With shaking hands I slowly opened the file. Oh my god. No. "My littles." I mumbled to myself.

"What was that Sam?" I heard Morgan say. But I couldn't respond. Hell I couldn't even breathe. I just stare at the file. The pictures of these six boys. "Sam. What's up?" I heard Morgan again.

"Sam. What is it kiddo?" I heard again. This time it was Rossi.

I shook my head and looked down. He got them. He found the littles. This is my fault. Looking around at 5 worried faces I kept my head low. "Sam are you alright?" Morgan asks.

"COD?" I quietly asked.

"We haven't heard back yet." Reid answered.

"Hotch can I go to he morgue?" I asked.

"Sam are you sure. You don't look great. Maybe you should just go to the hotel for the night." Hotch said. I shook my head and looked at him with pleading eyes. He nodded. "Okay. Fine. Summers and Morgan go to the ME. Rossi and Reid the dump sight. JJ and I'll go to the high school." He said and everyone nodded.

I ended up zoning out after that. The hour long flight felt like an eternity. The car ride with Morgan to the ME"s office was quiet. As Morgan drove I watched my old town fly by. Old memories flew around in my head.

As we pulled up I subconsciously grabbed onto the pendant around my neck. Next thing I know we're standing in a room with six covered bodies.

"I'm SSA Morgan. This is SSA Summers. We're with the FBI. What can you tell us?" Morgan asked

"Well the victims weren't injured. COD was a drug overdose. Oxy. Now what I have come up with is that they are all indeed related brothers. All six of em. I don't know if this is a signature or whatever but they all had the same necklace on." She finally said. "For some reason I kept them on. The only difference is an letter on the back of each."

I took a deep breath and walked over to one of the bodies. Slowly I pulled the sheet down. Once I saw the blonde hair I froze. "Blue eyes?" I asked quietly.

"Yep. Every one of them." He said.

I nodded and reached down to the necklace. Which was the same as mine. I turned it over. D. This is Damon. I moved to the next boy. He was older. So I already knew. But I looked anyway. X. This is Lex. The next was A. Andy. Then came P. Preston. And then an L. Liam. And finally a C. Cole.

I took a step back and grabbed onto my own pendant. Mine has a J.

"I wonder what the letters are? Maybe the first letter of their name. And what's the necklace? What do you think Sam?" Morgan asked me.

I nodded "it's a St. Jude pendant saint of lost causes." I said and started pointing . "Cole. Liam. Pres. Preston. Andy. Lex. An. And. Damon." I whispered.

Morgan looked at me with a confused look on his face until he saw my hand. And what I was holding. He slowly walked over to me placing his hand on mine. "Sam. Let me see." He said. I moved my hand and he flipped the pendant over. Everything started to get blurry. And sounds were muffled. "Sam. What does J mean?" He whispered.

"J. Joy" I whispered back before I felt my legs give out and my vision got spotty.

I get Morgan grab me. "Whoa. Okay. I got you. Sam talk to me. Sam."

I clenched my eyes shut and held onto Morgan. "I'm okay." I whispered. "Sorry."

"Okay. Let's sit ya down. Okay." He said leading me to a stool.

"Morgan. I'm fine. Let's just go to the station. Meet with Hotch. Okay?" I said shaking my head.

He did argue. We just walked to the car. We drove in silence again. I stared out the window watching. Remembering. Regretting.

"What are the littles?" Morgan asked breaking the silence.

"The eight babies that lived in the house. And before you ask. No. The other two aren't dead. They're safe. I'll explain more when we see the team." I mumbled.

We got to the station and met with the rest of the team. "Guys. We need to talk." I said. Everyone nodded and went into a conference room. I took a deep breath and looked at my team. "The six victims are six of the eight littles. That's not a last name. It's just something we called them. The oldest is Lex. He was born in 2000. Then we have the 5 year olds. Cole, Liam, Andy, Damon, Preston, Mickey and Sean. Mickey and Sean are safe where they are for now." I said and closed my eyes for what I'm about to say next. "Their should be either seven or eight bodies. We know for a fact that seven have died. Johnny was the first. He killed himself when he was 12. Then was my brother Klous. He was 8 when he was shot. D.J and Jessie were next. They had their heads bashed in. They were 14. James was 17. One of oldest. He was stabbed. Hunt. Hunter was 15. He couldn't deal with it anymore. He killed himself. Matty. Poor innocent Matty. He was 12. But had the mentality of a toddler. He beat him to death. For no reason. Jack was the turning point. A week before we left. Jackson was gone. He's the only one who we never saw die. We never saw him again. He was almost 18." I stopped for a second. "That day we learned that if we didn't get out soon. We never would. We were all 15. Except for Haley and the littles. We were okay with waiting until we aged out of the system. But as it turns out you never age out of that house. You never make it to 18. But here's the problem. We found the littles. Where are the bigs?" I asked.

Hotch looked at me with a confused expression. "Who?"

"The rest of us. The nine who did get out in 2007. Ten bigs and eight littles walked out of that house on June 14th, 2007. Boarded busses, trains, cabs." I stopped to look at Hotch. "You're talking to one of them. Where are the other nine?" I asked.

As soon as I was finished the detective walked in. "We have another dumping out by the train station." He said.

I closed my eyes. "How many?" I asked.

"nine. They were all tortured before being shot execution style."

All eyes were on me. "Let's go." I mumbled with my head down. This is my fault. My family is dead. Coming back here was my plan. What have I done? I got up walked past everyone. Despite my name being called I kept walking. I walked up to one of the SUVs and got in.

Hotch and JJ got after me. I just looked at my hands as we drove. This is my fault.

When we pulled up I looked around. This was the station that we left out of. This is my fault.

We walked up to the scene and I instantly wanted to throw up. My family. Beaten. Broken. Killed. This is my fault.

They were lined up shoulder to shoulder on their backs.

I looked around and stood next to the bodies before walking back to the car and grabbing paper and a pen.

In order from left to right I wrote out their names and ages

"Emily-19"

"Nick-19"

"Ellie-19"

"Louis-19"

"Kayla-19"

"Alli-19"

"Haley-21"

"Lucas-19"

"Janie-19"

I finished writing and tore each name from the pad before placing it in my friends chests before walking over to the other side of the road. This is my fault.

"You okay?" I hear Morgan ask. But I don't respond. "Sam?" He asks again. I look at him and let a single tear slip from my eye before walking back to the scene and looking at my friends again. This is my fault.

I sat down in the road just inches from Janie. I looked at each of them before raising my hands to sign. "I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. I'm so sorry. I love you all." I singed and clutched onto my pendant letting out a quiet sob. This is my fault.