Chewbecky:  Well, I'm sooooo sorry! I know it's been a few days since I've updated…

Ayana:  *runs in and falls at my feet* Help me! CHEWBECKY SAMA, HELP ME PLEEEAASSEEE!!!

Chewbecky:  * infamous eyebrow arch* Ayana chan!?  What in the world is going on?

Ayana:  *sobbing* Two girls *hiccup* were strangling me *hiccup* becuz Kakashi saw my melons..

Chewbecky: *sweat drop* And you want ME to do what about this?

Ayana: Aren't you like the "will of the macro-cosims" or something!?  Stop them, man!  STOP THEM!!

Ramen Sama and Mori san: *running in like rabid animals and sniffing the air* There! *they point to Ayana*

Ayana: *cowering behind me* OMG! Please, please do something and make them stop!

Chewbecky: *clear my throat* Ayana chan would like it--*get stomped upon*

Ramen Sama and Mori san: *pimp slapping the hell out of Ayana and cackling all evil like* I've got you now, Biotch!  How dare Kakashi see your headlights!!

Ayana: *falls down, and is immobile like in a horror movie* AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Kakashi: *poofs in* Chewbecky chan! *helps me up, and dusts me off* What happened!?

Chewbecky: (o_0)'…headlights….pimp slaps…

Kakashi: *ponders* hmmm…You mean they're fighting becuz I saw Ayana chan's headlights? (great deduction skills, nee?  he IS a jounin after all)

Chewbecky:  *coming to* yeah.  Now do something, since you're a jounin and all…

Kakashi: *eye glints evilly as he devises an EVIL plan* ladies…ladies…LADIES!

Ramen Sama and Mori san:  *drop Ayana's unconscious body* Kakashi SAMA!!

Kakashi: *eye still glinting…evilly* I meant no un-equality when I looked err, I mean, just happened to see Ayana chan's hoo-haws.  It seems the only way to settle this is…*rubs his hands together* for me to see yours as well! So, off with the tops!

Ramen Sama and Mori san: ….OKAY!!

Chewbecky:  SWEET MOTHER MARY!! *turn my head* I don't own Naruto, now on with chapter four before anymore flashing occurs.

At the evil hideout… (This will be known as Bloodyview Condominiums).

So, at Bloodyview Condo's, Condo number 13…

            The two evil figures have finally made it home and into their house.  Evil figure #1 sets his keys on the table in the narrow hallway.  Evil figure #2 is already in the kitchen, scrounging through the fridge for something to eat.

            "Branny muffins, is that you?" A very, very annoying feminine voice calls from the living room.

            "Hai…" evil figure #1 (a.k.a. 'branny muffins') replies.  Evil figure #2 can be heard gagging on whatever found to eat due to the 'term of endearment'.

            "Hon can't hear you!"

            "HAI…*mumbles* sugar dimples…"

            "BWAHAHAHAHAHA *cough* HAHAHA *gag* HAHAHA!" evil figure #2 bursts out.

The annoying female ignores the laughter and continues on, "You're just in time for Sex in the City.  Come on, you know I like to snuggle when I watch this…"

            "Hai…" whipped branny muffins mumbles as he trudges to the living room and plops down on the couch.

            "So how did your job go today?" Tammy, the annoying female, asked.

'Branny muffins' turns his head to face her, and sighs. "You know I'm not allowed to talk about my missions…We've been through this a hundred times…"

            "But how can I comfort you if you never tell me anything!?" Tammy pouted, her crystal blue eyes feinting a hurt look.  The blonde with black roots knew she could get away with murder with that look.  "I…I just wanna take care of you.  Is that so wrong…?"

            "You already take great care of me, boom-boom kitty."

            "Aww…branny muffins!! You know how it makes me feel when you call me that." Tammy purred in his ear.

            Branny muffins smiled on the inside, thankful that that conversation was over with.  The two of them wrapped themselves around each other and cuddled for the duration of Sex in the City.  Evil figure #2 made a face of disgust as he headed for his room and called it a night.

The next morning…back in main city Konoha.

            "I wanna be Fluttershy!"

            "No, NO! I'm Fluttershy this time, so you HAVE to be Sparkleworks!"

It went on and on, back and forth between the two little girls.  Sasuke, Sakura, Naruto and Kakashi were assigned the mission of watching these two little twins.  The only problem was that they were spoiled rotten.  What made the problem worse was that these two knew that their father was the daimyo of the fire country, and that meant they could raise hell and get away with it.

            "Well then if I can't be Fluttershy, then I 'm not playing prettiful-prancing-pony-princesses with you!" Yanagi, the brown hair brown eyed eldest twin, yelled while crossing her arms and sticking her nose up in the air.

            "Fine then, don't play with me!" Rei said while twirling her finger in one of her midnight black pigtails.  Her grey eyes took on a mischievous glint, "I'll just get HER to play with me", she said while pointing to Sakura.  She picked up her ponies and sat next to Sakura and began to tell her how prettiful prancing-pony-princesses was played.

            Yanagi took on a face of rage, "Oh yeah!  Then I guess I'll just have to play terrific-tipsy-tea-party with THEM!" she screamed, pointing to Sasuke, Naruto and Kakashi.  She then walked over and practically dragged them to her Disney princess power table.

            "That's not fair, Yanagi! You can't have three and I only get one!" Rei screeched with her hands on her hips.

            "Fine! You can have him *points to Sasuke*!"

            "No, I want him *points to Kakashi*!"

            "NO! You juss want him cuz he's got more prettiful hair!"

            "But you've got three who have more prettiful hair than the one I got *points to Sakura*, so you have to give me either that one *points to Naruto* or that one *points to Kakashi*."

            "Hey, we're not your toys! WE are real people!" Sakura yelled, fed up with the fact that her hair wasn't considered 'prettiful'.  "Now how about you treat us grown-ups with a little respect!?"

            Rei stood up, so she could look at Sakura face to face.  "If you don't do as we say, we'll give a bad report to our daddy!"

            "Yeah," Yanagi chimed in, "And we'll tell him that you were mean to us, and you hurt us!"

            "But we didn't even touch you…" Naruto stated the obvious truth.

            Yanagi's brown eyes slanted evilly, "Oh, yeah…?" she then scratched herself from her wrist to her elbow.

            Team 7's eyes went wide while they all simultaneously gulped.  Kakashi was the first to find his voice, "So how do we play terrific-tipsy-tea-party…?"

At a random store in Konoha…

            "I'm sorry ma'am; we've already filled that position."

            "Oh…thanks anyway" I reply as I trudge out of the store.  The only thing I've been hearing all morning is "you don't fit the credentials", "we were looking for someone who has basic ninja skills" or "we've already filled that position".  Gawd! I'm never gonna find a job at this rate.  Maybe I should just call it a day…NO! Not yet, there is still one more I haven't checked out yet.  I continued to walk down the busy streets of Konoha.  I had read earlier in the morning that the Konoha Ninja Academy were in search of new staff.  If I couldn't find a respectable job I would probably have to work in a bar, or even worse, a strip club. 

            Maybe this isn't the way people dress when job searching.  I had on a pair of Sakura's low-cut, dark blue jeans with a black, white and brown striped blouse that were open on the shoulders.  My hair was pulled up in a bun with the bottom half hanging down.  To top it all off, I had on a pair of Sakura's black leather boots with spiked heels.  Kakashi had said that if I asked for a job wearing this, that he would definitely give it to me.  That was probably a sign to change clothes…that I ignored.  I rounded the corner and took in a deep breath as I ascended the stairs to the Academy.  Here goes nothing'…

Back with the twins…

            "Isn't our pony princess daughter soooo boot-i-ful…?"

            "…ah…"Sasuke replied.

            "Daughter you go and get ready for the ball, while I talk with your father." Rei said in a regal tone.

            "H-hai…" Sakura managed through clenched teeth.

            "Ahem!"

            "I meant:  Hai, oh beau-terrific pony queen mother…"Sakura said while she pretended to trot her pony off somewhere else.

            Rei turned to Sasuke, "Oh husband, do you think our daughter will find her prince tonight at the ball?"

            "…ah…"

Rei sighed and rolled her eyes, "Geesh, you have to say something more than "ah"!!"

Sasuke cleared his throat while his face blushed slightly, "Of course she will, dear.  She reminds me of you when we met at that ball…"

            "Oh, husband! You always know just what to say!!" Rei sighed while linking arms with the Uchiha.  Sakura sat off in the corner, cursing under her breath at the fact that this five year old is getting farther with Sasuke than she ever had.

            "How is your tea, Kaka kun?" Yanagi asked politely.

Kakashi arched his eye happily and sipped from his pretend tea cup, "Why it's the best tea I've ever tasted."

            "Why thank you.  How about you, Naru chan?"

            "Naru CHAN!?" Naruto began but was elbowed in the side by Kakashi, "I mean…ah…the tea is great, Yanagi sama…"

            Kakashi and Naruto sat most uncomfortably with their knees bent up to their chests (since the table was made for children), but somehow kept smiles plastered on their faces (Kakashi did, at least).

            I'd rather deal with a thousand Tazuna's than have to play with this brat for another second…Kakashi thought to himself while he passed Yanagi the plastic crumpets.

In the Recruiting Office of the Ninja Academy…

            "So, why do you think you qualify for this job?" A man with a green flack jacket asked me from behind a metal desk with all sorts of papers stacked on it.

            "Well," I began, crossing my legs, "I love children.  Ever since I was little I knew I wanted to give back to the community.  When I was in school I was always amazed by the gift of teaching.  I want to touch the lives of children the same way my teachers touched my life.  I'm proficient in reading, writing and arithmetic; and I think I have good temperament when it comes to dealing with young children."

            A warm smile possessed the lips of the brown pony-tailed man sitting across from me.  He took a deep sigh and ran his fingers quickly across the horizontal scar on his face.  "You know what?  You're the only applicant I've interviewed today that seems to think teaching is more than just a job…"

            "…"  I didn't know what to say.  I was expecting a swift, yet polite rejection much like the kind I've been receiving all day.

            "Between me and you, you've got the job.  Be here bright and early, 9 am tomorrow morning.  By then, I'll be done with paper work…"

            "..REALLY!?" I jump out of my seat, hugging the breath out of the poor man, "Ohmahgod, Ohmahgod, Ohmahgod!!  You will not be disappointed, thank you SO MUCH!"

            "Y-you're welcome…"

            "Ack! I'm sorry!" I apologize while releasing him.

            "It's okay.  Just remember, Ayana san, tomorrow. 9 am. Room 12-C. You'll be my new teacher assistant."

            "Hai, Iruka san!" I straighten my back and salute him, "Thanks, again." I say while I practically skip out of the building and all the way home.

Chewbecky: *passes straws out to the audience* Yes, I know, I know!  This chapter totally sucks!

Kakashi: *shakes his head* Tell me about it… This chapter sucks harder than a harlot in a red light district…

Chewbecky: *throws a brick at him* Well I wouldn't know anything about a "red-light district", Kaka kun!  Just how do you know about it!?

Kakashi" *putting ice on his newest lump* Hehe…you know…missions…they have you go to the strangest places…

Chewbecky:  *cuts her eyes* Anyways, reviews are welcome.  I would really appreciate some constructive criticism!!

Kakashi: *plots evilly* There might even be an unveiling of the mysterious evil figures, next chapter!!

Chewbecky: *covers his mouth* hush fool! Don't be tellin' all my bizness!!