A/N: Thanks again everyone for your wonderful reviews, they really are incentive for me! Apologies for the slow update, I've had a headache for 5 days now!

BTW - remember that photo of Kelli Williams I mentioned.......................................


Part 4

Deciding to give Emily some space, Gillian stood and cleared the small coffee table. Walking to the kitchen she glanced back to see Emily was still deep in thought but appeared much more at ease than she had since she arrived earlier. Placing the remnants of the pizza in the fridge, Gillian poured herself another glass of wine and took a minute to reflect on the evening. So much for a quiet night spent on her own she thought, not that she in any way begrudged Emily coming over, she was happy to no longer be alone. She felt a warm sense of pride that she had been able to comfort and reassure Emily, especially as she had been so distressed. The evening was also far from over she mused. Had she over-stepped 'the line' earlier when she told Cal to back off? That cursed line she thought, what a stupid bloody concept, where did it start and end, who drew it, did it even exist anymore? The fact that Emily had chosen to come here tonight proved that Gillian was more than just Cal's business partner, but she knew that anyway, they were friends, close friends who cared for and respected each other. But is that all they were?

Thinking back to her brief phone conversation with Cal earlier, she again flinched at the cold harsh tone and words he had subjected her to. Of course he had been deeply worried at the time, but his animosity toward her had hurt more than she liked to admit. As much as she tried to rationalise his actions, it didn't make her feel any better, the flutter of pain he had caused had now settled into a dull ache in her chest. Gillian almost felt ridiculous for feeling this way, she and Cal had argued many times, but usually his anger had been directed at a case, or a particular individual who'd pissed him off. Rarely had it been aimed at her, and on the few times when it had, Cal had been quick to apologise, genuine shame evident in his eyes. This time though he'd chosen words to deliberately cause pain, Gillian knew he wasn't being consciously malicious, but he'd been furious and in that moment he had wanted to lash out and hurt her – he'd succeeded.

Alarmed to feel the prick of tears in her own eyes, Gillian took a long swallow of her wine and headed toward the spare room, pausing at the laundry closet to collect clean bedding. As she began making up the spare bed, Gillian looked up and smiled as Emily joined her.

"Hey kiddo, how're you feeling?" she asked.

"Tired, but better thanks," Emily responded as she grabbed a pillow and started to wrestle it into the pillow case.

"Good, I'm glad. You know your dad's coming over soon don't you?"

Emily nodded, her eyes downcast as she gave the pillow a hefty shake.

"Yeah I know, but do I have to see him?" she asked, her voice taking a pleading note, "he'll probably still be mad at me for coming here and I don't want to fight with him again."

"You just leave your dad to me Em," Gillian assured her, hoping that she'd be able to diffuse the ticking bomb that was, on occasion, Cal Lightman.

Pausing for a moment, Emily's tone became thoughtful.

"You're wrong you know," she said cryptically as she pursed her lips in contemplation.

"About what?" Gillian asked, puzzled by the sudden change of topic.

"About dad," she replied, "I've been thinking about what you said before, you know about the mask he wears?"

Gillian nodded, unsure about where the conversation was headed.

"He doesn't always wear it when he's with you; I've seen him sometimes, the way he looks at you when you're not looking and I just know that he's sad, or happy, or confused. Do you ever see it?" Emily asked, trying to keep a look of innocent curiosity whilst knowing that the relationship between Gillian and her father was at best complicated, at worst completely off limits.

Of course Gillian wasn't fooled, she knew what Emily was doing but she also couldn't argue that she was wrong. Many times she had glanced up and found Cal watching her, a brief flash of an undefined emotion on his face before he swiftly and expertly covered it up. It drove her nuts, she was frustrated and hurt that he felt the need to conceal himself around her, but she was also a hypocrite as she did it too. It had become a habit while she'd been with Alec, a shield to hide her pain from him, and her sadness from others, including Cal. If only Cal would just once let her truly see him, maybe she'd feel safe enough to do the same, but that was highly unlikely as they were both too stubborn and too afraid of being hurt to let their walls down. She had actually done just that recently though, when that bastard Matheson had held Cal hostage. She'd been so terrified that Matheson was going to kill Cal that her emotions had spilled over, and control had been relinquished. But Cal still wore his armour that day; she'd maybe felt a tiny niche later that evening when he had clung to her and she'd felt the pounding of his heart as he'd momentarily surrendered, but the moment had quickly passed and Cal had resumed his usual 'I feel nothing' persona.

Treading carefully, Gillian considered her response, trying to ignore the stirrings of both hope and anxiety caused by Emily's words.

"I don't know about that Em, I haven't seen it myself," she lied, cursing herself for her cowardice but unwillingly to tread these waters, especially with Emily who was a particularly sensitive and perceptive kid.

Not falling for it, Emily stopped what she was doing and pierced Gillian with an 'I'm not buying it' look! Her large expressive eyes conveying that she knew that Gillian knew, exactly what she was talking about!

Gillian was surprised to find herself flustered by Emily's accusatory stare, interviewing potential suspects rarely made her feel that way! This conversation was rapidly heading for dangerous ground, her relationship with Cal was confusing in her own mind so how could she possibly vocalise it with Cal's teenage daughter?

"Look Em, it's complicated okay? Your dad and I work together, you know we care about each other but we have to be professional, we have a job to do!" she knew it was a cop out, but this discussion was starting to make her feel extremely uneasy.

Emily sensed Gillian's discomfort and felt a little guilty, but she was so frustrated with the two of them dancing around each other all the time. She had already told Gillian that her dad was much happier when he was with her, and she'd meant it! He smiled and laughed more, was more relaxed and well…….happier! She didn't need to be a body language expert to see that sometimes when they were in a room together, it was as though no-one else existed, the way they held each others' complete attention, the way Gillian's eyes softened when she looked at her dad. She just wished they would both get a clue!

Sensing an opportunity for distraction, Gillian gestured Emily to help her with the duvet cover and quickly the two of them were giggling as they tried to force the comforter to submit.

When the bed was finally ready for its occupant, Gillian stretched trying to work out the kinks that had set up residence in her back after a day of cleaning, sorting and counselling. As she did so her top rose to reveal a much greater expanse of bare skin and she jumped as Emily let out a shriek.

"No way!" Emily screeched, lunging across the bed and pushing up the hem of Gillian's shirt.

"Way!" Gillian responded, chuckling as she realised what Emily was looking at.

"I can't believe you have a tattoo," she exclaimed, not at all embarrassed by the fact that she was staring intently at Gillian's bare hip.

"Why?" she asked, somewhat indignantly, "your dad has plenty of them, and compared with his this barely qualifies."

"I know but you're so…" Emily paused, thinking of the right word to describe the woman who played such an important role in her life, "…..sensible!"

Gillian was a little dismayed by Emily's response, she was fed up of being sensible, sensible was boring!

"I didn't use to be you know, I used to be fun and a bit of a party animal," she admitted, hoping to redeem herself somewhat.

Emily just smiled in apparent disbelief; she still focused on the small but perfect star that decorated Gillian's hip.

"When did you get it?" she asked, curiosity now flooding her young face.

Happy to let Emily continue her examination, Gillian gave a brief explanation.

"Spring break in Miami when I was 19, a group of us all came back to college with various tattoos and / or piercings!" Gillian laughed not sure which was funnier, the memory of that crazy week or the look of complete shock on Emily's face.

"Wow!" Emily muttered, temporarily speechless, but then a thought occurred.

"Has dad seen it?" she asked hesitantly.

Slightly taken aback as to why Emily thought he might have, Gillian replied, "no why would he?"

Emily just shrugged, "I just think he'd like it! He likes tattoos," 'and he'd really like this one', she added in her mind.

Ignoring the flush that suddenly burned her face, Gillian's embarrassment was given a reprieve as Emily cracked a huge yawn.

"I'll go and get you something to sleep in," she stated, quickly heading out of the room.

Entering her own bedroom, Gillian took some deep breaths to calm herself. Emily's words may have seemed innocent enough, but the image of Cal's fingers gently brushing her tattoo had suddenly scorched itself into her mind. She had a feeling it would be some time before she was able to erase it. Summoning her professional mask, she headed back to Emily carrying an oversized t-shirt.

After the usual ritual of face washing, tooth cleaning and dressing for bed, Gillian sat next to a very sleepy Emily who was now buried in a cocoon of pillows and comforter.

"I don't know why I'm so tired," she yawned, "I never go to bed this early usually."

"Emotional confrontations are exhausting Em," Gillian explained, remembering back the blazing rows she and Alec had shared. Frequently she had sought sanctuary by climbing into bed and burying herself under the covers after a particularly nasty altercation.

Emily nodded, "thanks Gillian," she whispered, "I'm sorry I dumped all this on you, but I knew you would help and you have," she added sincerely.

"You're welcome kiddo, and you have nothing to apologise for. I meant it when I said you're welcome anytime, I love having you here."

Gillian felt a small lump in her throat as she studied Emily's features; she looked more like a tired, vulnerable child than a mature young lady at this moment. Unable to stop herself, she leant forward to brush a small kiss on Emily's forehead, tucking her hair behind her ear as she did so.

"And I love you too," she whispered.

Standing to leave the room, Gillian's heart stopped as she heard a muffled response.

"Night Gillian, I love you."


Hope I didn't take too many liberties with characterisation there, but this is fanfiction, we can all embellish a little!

Let me know your thoughts................