Peeta comes to my house every day after that. Sometimes we paint, sometimes we sit and talk, sometimes we watch the Games. District 12 has been feeling a little softer and happier, as the people are rejoicing over the rule change, and even the fact that both our tributes have made it this far. I decide that it's hope hanging in the air that makes everything smell a little sweeter. Peeta and I are both a little tense, now that Madge and Gale are only up against a few more enemies – Clove and Cato from District 2, that fox-faced girl from 5, and the bulky guy named Thresh from 11. And Gale's hurt badly; he suffered a serious leg wound protecting Madge from Cato, so his only hope of surviving is Madge getting medicine from the feast. I would bet anything that she's going to sneak away from him while he's sleeping to get 12's pack. She might not be skilled with weapons or built for fighting, but she's quick and strong-willed. She cares about Gale a whole lot. Maybe she can save him, after all.
Today Peeta shows up at my door without a box of paints and fresh paper. Instead, he walks in with a loaf of bread and places it on the table before joining me in front of the TV. It's mid-afternoon, so Gale and Madge are presumably awake, chatting away or finding food, but currently, the camera is set on the boy from 11, who is stalking the pair from 2 from a distance. I bet the Gamemakers think he's going to strike soon.
I turn the volume of the TV down lower, uninterested in watching these stupid Games unless Madge and Gale come on the screen. It's a sadistic way to be thinking, but if something were to happen to them I wouldn't want to walk around not knowing about it. The remote falls off the couch to the floor, and I slump back into discomfort.
"I think they're going to make it," Peeta says with hope spewing from his mouth.
"I know," I answer wistfully, not wanting to get too excited incase I end up losing them.
"What are you thinking about?" he asks curiously, as I haven't been talking much or expressing any emotion other than pensive thought. I just shrug back at him and stare at the wall. He sighs audibly and moves a little bit closer. "Don't zone out on me again, Katniss," he warns, concerned.
"I'm not," I reply sharply.
"Would you just talk to me for once? I know you're not really a conversationalist, but I barely ever get to hear your voice. Say something." I look at his expression, which is filled with worry and anxiety.
"What do you want me to say?"
He shifts in his seat. "Anything. Tell me three things you're thinking about right now."
My face contorts into a skeptical glare. "That's stupid."
"No, I'm serious. Just do it," he coaxes.
"Alright, fine," I agree, letting out a puff of breath and rolling my eyes. "1. I want Gale and Madge to come home. 2. I like not having to watch the Games by myself." I hesitate at the third one. "3. You smell like a bakery."
His eyes sparkle before his head falls back and laughter tumbles out of his mouth. "I'm trying to decide if that's a compliment or not," he adds with another chuckle.
"It is," I say simply with a small smile. "Now you have to do it."
"Okay. 1. I want Gale and Madge to come home. 2. I like not having to watch the Games by myself. 3. You are very beautiful." He states the third as plainly as if he were saying the sky is blue; as if he already accepts it as fact and doesn't question it.
I blush at the notion. "Thank you."
He doesn't need to say anything back. Instead he just slides an arm around my waist and pulls me closer. I accept the gesture, and sit in pleasant silence with him.
XXXXXX
"Three things," he says as he walks in the front door.
"What? Again?"
"Just do it."
"Fine. 1. The feast is starting soon and Madge is going. 2. I didn't get much game this morning. 3. Prim has barely come home from the Hawthorne's all week. Now you go."
"1. I'm worried about the District 2 girl getting to Madge at the feast. 2. Bakery sales aren't doing so well lately. 3. My name is stupid." I laugh at his light-hearted comment and plop down next to him on the couch.
I'm on the edge of my seat. I didn't realize the feast would be starting so soon. Madge could be dead in minutes. The camera flashes over Clove, who is unaccompanied. They showed her talking to Cato – they don't think both of them should go, and her knives are quicker and accurate from a distance, so she's going in for the bag. I turned it off yesterday when they started talking about how she would kill Madge.
All of a sudden, a shock of bright orange hair flashes across the screen. It's the 5 girl. Clove isn't there quick enough, but if she had gotten there 10 seconds sooner, I'm sure Foxface would be wearing a knife by now. She grabs her pack and runs for it, disappearing into the woods. I bet she's running like hell to get away from any traps now.
Without warning, Madge appears in the area, sprinting to the bag marked 12. I think she's going to get away unscathed and unchallenged, but the angle of the camera the Gamemakers chose to broadcast doesn't show everything. It doesn't show Clove sprinting from the other side of the Cornucopia. It doesn't show Clove pull a knife out of her jacket. But it does show Clove appearing 50 feet away from Madge, running at her when she's not looking. And it does show the knife that Clove chucks at her when she's in close range. Madge dodges it by diving to the side, and the dagger whizzes past her, lodging in the ground yards away. Clove closes in on her, but Madge is smart. She rolls over quickly, and when Clove lands on the ground beside her, she launches herself on top of the dark-haired girl. Madge is heavier, and is able to pin Clove down, but for some reason she isn't pulling her knife out of her pocket.
Come on, Madge. You can do this, I think to myself, as if urging her on mentally will do anything. Of course she won't, though. She's not a killer. Clove eventually gets the upper hand, kicking hard enough to force Madge on the ground underneath her. She doesn't hesitate like Madge did; she pulls a blade right out of her pocket and holds it up to Madge's cheek, pressing just hard enough to draw blood. The blonde girl beneath her squirms and wriggles but can't get free, and Clove has her legs and arms flat on the ground already.
"We're going to do this nice and slow," she says with an evil twinge to her voice, and I feel a little sick to my stomach. "What's your stupid boyfriend's name? Gale?" she chuckles to herself. "Does he make you scream like this?" she shouts into Madge's face as she plunges the blade into Madge's side. But she doesn't scream. She won't give Clove the pleasure. Instead, she squeezes her eyes shut for a second and lets out a shaky breath. The 2 girl looks momentarily upset, but turns it into pure rage and anger.
"Oh, you're not going to scream for him? We'll see about that, won't we?" Clove stabs Madge again, this time in the stomach, but she won't scream. She winces again, but she won't scream.
"Fucking bitch," Clove yells, and she begins slicing Madge all over in frustration. Madge squeals and kicks, but Clove doesn't give up. "Scream, blondie! Call out for him!"
And she won't.
But that doesn't mean that Clove doesn't find Gale. She finds him, alright, when an arrow lodges in her jugular, and she spits out blood before collapsing to the ground. Madge grabs Clove's knife and backs away from her slowly.
"Run, Madge! Run!" Gale screams, and she does. She sprints for Gale, even though I know her body is flaming with pain. When she reaches Gale, they take off for safety, unsure if one of the other three will come for them. I seriously doubt that the 5 girl will come after them, but Thresh and Cato are menacing.
The camera switches from Madge and Gale back to Clove laying outside the Cornucopia, panting. There are no more tribute packs left, so I assume Thresh came and snatched his without being noticed. Cato rushes to Clove's side, whispering her name.
"Clove, Clove, no," he whimpers. "Don't die. Please, no. We're supposed to go home together." Blood pours out of her mouth again; she's spewing the sticky red liquid. She reaches for his hand and he takes hers without hesitation. "I'm so sorry, Clove. I should have gone to the Cornucopia, not you. I'm so sorry," he tells her.
She looks right into his eyes and chokes on her own bodily fluids before managing in a pained, drowning voice, "I love you."
Cato's crying now, hot tears filling his eyes and falling over his cheeks. "I love you too, Clove."
And then a cannon.
Cato lowers his forehead to Clove's stomach, still clutching her hand. "No! No! No!" he screams desperately. But there's nothing he can do, so he says goodbye to her a final time and departs before he has to watch her body taken from the ground by a hovercraft. As he walks away, a promise falls from his lips. "I promise, Clove."
The camera flashes back to Madge and Gale. They've reached the cave, and Madge doubles over in pain, vomiting and dry-heaving for several minutes outside the mouth of the cave. She was stabbed twice in the stomach, and I have a sudden fear that she might not make it, depending on how bad the internal damage is. Gale clutches his leg and hobbles into the cave, immediately taking up residency on the floor where he left their sleeping bags. When Madge is done vomiting, she goes to him in the cave to give him medicine.
"Are you okay?" she asks him.
His eyes grow wide and almost angry-looking. "Am I okay?" he enunciates. "Madge, you told me you weren't going to go. You knew one or both of those District 2 kids were going to be there, and you went anyway."
She looks at him sternly. "I wasn't going to let you die, Gale! It was either watch you die here and never forgive myself or risk my life to get the one thing that might help. What did you think I was going to do?"
"You should have stayed here! Clove could have killed you! And she left some pretty bad wounds, so that's still not out of the question! I'd die if I knew I was the reason you went and got yourself killed."
"I'm not going to die, Gale. Besides, even if I don't make it out of here, you still have –" He cuts her off, silencing her with a kiss. His hands slide up to her face and he holds her there in front of him.
"I still have you, don't I?" he asks with a smile.
Well played, Hawthorne. Well played.
I stare blankly at the screen. It's not lost on me what she was going to say. She was going to say that he still has me. And then he deliberately changed her words around to deny any feelings for me, and affirm his love for her. My glance turns down to the ground, but for some reason the pain doesn't come. There's no empty void anymore where Gale used to be.
Peeta pulls his hand out of my firm grasp. Wait, when did that happen? Did I grab his hand when Clove threw the knife? I must have.
"You know, the sad part about this all is that he really does still love you," Peeta murmurs, walking toward the door.
"What?"
"Oh, come off it, Madge! You're still in love with him, aren't you? I can see it. And you think he's not even in love with you anymore, but don't you get it? It's all an act, and that's what they want you to think, that's what they want all of Panem to think. But the sick thing is, is you believe it." He starts to walk away, and it all makes sense. They put this all together. They aren't really in love; they're faking it for sponsors. And Haymitch Abernathy must have gotten that rule change for the crowd appeal. The Capitol citizens must love this stuff – the two star-crossed lovers who were destined to be together, thrown into the same tragic circumstance, but saved by the forgiving grace of the Capitol. Gale doesn't love her, he really loves me.
Peeta's about to walk out the door, but I don't want him to leave. I don't want him to stop coming here. I don't want to keep screwing up and pushing him away, but apparently that's what I keep doing. "Peeta!" I call before he leaves. He hesitates a moment and looks over his shoulder, and the emotion he's trying to conceal is leaking onto his face. "Three things."
"Are you kidding, Katniss? Is this some kind of a joke to you?"
"Just do it, okay?"
He sighs. "1. Gale loves you. 2. You love Gale. 3. I love you."
For some reason, the third doesn't take me by surprise. I think I knew it this whole time, but I was afraid to admit it to myself. But now it's my turn. Peeta turns again to leave, expecting that I won't return his sentiment, but I stop him. "You didn't let me do mine!" I say. He stops, but does not turn towards me. When I am sure I have his attention, and he's not going to leave, I start. "1. Gale loves me. 2. I do not love Gale. And 3 is..." I stop, the words jumping around in my throat before I decide whether I can say them. They're sliding back down my throat again, but I must say this to him to make him stay; I must tell him how I feel if I don't want to lose him. After a small pause, I continue. "3 is… I love you too."
