I had a dream that night.
At first, it was a normal dream, a skewed version of the welcoming feast that we had every year at the start of school. People's faces were distorted and they displayed a wide range of emotions, none of which I wanted to see. I screamed at people in the dream, vented all of my frustration. It was something that I hadn't done in real life. Scorpius Malfoy was there as well, telling me funny jokes that made me feel better. He was the one part of the dream that appeared as it always did in the waking world.
Then it changed. The images became vivid, the sounds clearer, scents sharper. I forgot that I was dreaming. For a moment, as I took in my odd surroundings, I felt nothing. Then terror began to trickle down my spine. My teeth chattered and I hugged my shoulders. There was a foreboding scent on the air, like the too-sweet stench of rotten fruit. I couldn't see any source of light but the small, featureless room that I was standing in seemed to be illuminated from everywhere and nowhere, the only thing about it that was remotely dream like. The too-close walls were the colour of damp earth and my panic rose as I wondered if I had been buried alive. I was going to run out of air and suffocate. A whine escaped my mouth and I pressed my hands against my stomach as I sank down to the floor.
I sat there, freezing in the unearthly cold, my imagination wandering into dangerous territory. I don't know how long it was that I sat there on my own, only that it hadn't been long enough. Because I wasn't alone anymore. Somebody placed a blanket around my shoulders and I froze in place. There was something familiar about this… a scream rose in my throat but I couldn't force it passed the lump that was taking up most of the room there.
I suddenly noticed a mirror that hadn't been on the wall before. In it, I could see myself… and the man that was crouched beside me. I could tell a few things about him. He was young and built like a sprinter, his hair blond and attractively unkempt. His facial features were hidden by shadows that didn't exist anywhere else in the room and I couldn't tell who he was. Something in me recognised him though. This was the man who had hurt me, the man I couldn't even remember without him hurting me again. He spoke in a voice like slick oil and my skin crawled.
"Yes… you know me, don't you Lily?"
He traced a finger along my jaw line and I shuddered.
"Oh," he said softly, bringing his lips close to my ear, "I would never hurt you. You know that,"
I whimpered and screamed shrilly when he placed an arm around me and pulled me onto his lap.
"Will you do something for me?"
His breath was warm against the skin of my cheek. I squeezed my eyes shut.
"W-what do you want m-me to do?" I managed through my chattering teeth.
His lips brushed my cheek and I felt him smile, "I'll show you,"
He pulled me to my feet and led me away. The dank, underground room lengthened as he went. As we walked hand-in-hand, my mind worked desperately to find a way out. There was no escape though. This tunnel didn't even exist without him in it. The place where we had been had melted into nothing as we left it behind.
We stopped and the stench that I had first noticed earlier was overpowering. It rose bile in my throat. The far side of the circular cavern we now stood in was cloaked in shadow. He waved a hand and light flared, revealing a single flash of terrifying imagery. I screamed. I screamed for all I was worth and I didn't stop until my throat gave out. He held me and stroked my hair until I gave up and broke down into useless, pathetic sobs that ruined his shirt with saltwater.
"That's what you want?" I said.
"That's all I'm asking," he replied, "For now,"
"Show me again," I said, "Longer… I need to be sure I saw what I saw,"
He nodded and the room filled with light once more. This time it stayed on, fully revealing the horror before me. I went over to what lay on the floor in a daze. I kept expecting it to move; but it didn't stir, not once. The man was middle aged, with grey flecking his dark hair. I fancied that he once would have held himself proudly. Now he was sprawled artlessly across the floor in this nameless, inconstant place, glassy eyes staring blankly into death. I felt too empty to react.
"Who is it?" I surprised myself by asking.
"A muggle," replied the man, "A bad person. He kills people and worse,"
"And… you want me to kill him?"
"I do,"
I stood up and faced him bravely, staring at where I thought his eyes were, "No,"
He was standing close to me before I realised he had moved, bodies almost touching. He bent down and his lips were inches from mine. His too-warm breath floated around me in a hazy cloud, making me dizzy.
"You forget," he said with quiet menace, "I own you, Lily Potter. You are mine,"
The dream changed again and it was a relief. I was creeping through the Gryffindor common room, clutching a knife in my hands so hard that my knuckles where white. I stopped above my brother Albus's bed. I placed the knife against his throat. The voice that came out of my mouth was not mine and I felt my eyes widen in surprise.
"Is this a dream?" said the voice, "How can you tell reality from fantasy? Perhaps life itself is a dream and we only truly wake up…"
The knife caressed Albus's throat, drawing a delicate bead of blood.
"… in death,"
Another voice, one groggy with sleep, came from another of the boy's beds.
"Lily? What are you doing... oh my god,"
I had about twenty seconds to be confused before he shouted the alarm.
"ALBUS! WAKE UP!"
There was a huge commotion as the entire common room was woken. People shouted, someone tackled me from behind and wrestled the knife away from me. As I was dragged, sobbing and broken out of the room, I realised one thing. This had stopped being a dream as soon as I had left his cavern. I had nearly killed my brother.
He really did own me.
