Through the first period, he forces himself to sit upright, not to bury his face in his arms and bask in the smell of his. Sheer effort only can help him not to dwell on the memory of goofy face of his when Aomine thanked him, though unable to being too helpful.
Whether voicing out his gratitude was worthy or not, he can't decide. It isn't like him to thank someone, he is aware. If Satsuki heard this, she would yelp in shock but she isn't going to know. Aomine doesn't want to share, he wants the memory all to himself because he doesn't regret, oddly enough.
Is he engrossed too deeply – in this bizarre obsession of his?
'Obsession' seems to sum up his recent behavior quite well. Is it wrong, obsessing to witness each of the prominent emotions, every single change of expression, little or not – obsessing about another guy? He knows it is judged by other people. His parents, friends, teammates will judge him, most likely.
Aomine never cared what others thought of him before.
Will he start now?
. . .
His heart has kept thumping strongly in his chest. Does he have a heart disease?
"…Kagami-kun?"
Maybe he should see a doctor. He might have a sickness to prevent him play basketball ever again. He isn't sure when he caught this condition, ailment or whatever cursed thing it is but he's sure it is all his fault-
"Kagami-kun."
"Wha-?! Damn, Kuroko! Didn't I tell you to stop doing that!"
"I have been calling you… We are changing classrooms."
"Oh…? Yeah, okay."
His phantom friend isn't any help to his disease. He thought his heart was going to pop out of his throat. It is now slowing down to its usual rhythm, though, as he rises from his seat, albeit grudgingly. Next lesson being music does not improve his reluctance as it is another subject he has no clue what he is doing.
The reluctance in his mind seems spreading to every fiber of his body, even his limbs offer resistance. His knees almost buckle when he is standing; he wobbles his way out of the classroom.
"Kagami-kun, are you alright?"
He opens his mouth to answer; however then, memories flash – memories of him in his bed, submitted to his fever, childishly holding Kagami's arm, eating everything he cooked, thanking him – image of his smile.
Ba-thump ba-thump ba-thump
"No, I think I have a heart problem."
. . .
He must be in one of his good dreams.
Hyuuga said he will stay being his friend, even consider…
He doesn't hate Kiyoshi. It must be true because, a week after, they are sitting together in Maji Burger with Riko. They bicker, his coach and captain. There is a wary air surrounding them – enough to have Riko curious, not enough to alienate Kiyoshi.
Riko doesn't voice her inquiries, however. Kiyoshi didn't speak about his infatuation before. She is already suspecting, he has supposed, and he's deemed nothing good would come out of opening himself up, even to his closest friends. But now Hyuuga…
Maybe he should talk to Riko, taking her opinion in the matter might help.
He has a sliver of chance now, after all.
Though not right away – he will speak with her later. For now, he is content with having Hyuuga not ignoring him, accepting his existence beside him even though he knows, and listening to his friends' quarrel.
Kiyoshi smiles and this time, it doesn't hurt.
. . .
Lying on the rooftop wasn't ever uncomfortable before.
His crossed arms under his head and his legs leisurely spread on the concrete twitch to get a move on, walk to that school and camp right outside of its gates.
It is only the third period. He already itches to see him.
Is that crazy – he doesn't know but he doesn't need to dwell on it since Satsuki comes to his well-known resting place after recess bell rings.
"Dai-chan, what are you doing? It's cold, aren't you still sick?"
"Nah, I'm fine."
She doesn't believe him, Aomine can tell even if his eyes are closed. However, it appears as she has other questions in mind because she jumps into a different topic.
"Okay. Well, where did you disappear yesterday after school? Your parents called my house, they were worried about you – you never went home, didn't you?! Luckily, I was the one who answered the phone and I told them you were in my house but why didn't you even tell me?! I know that although you act irresponsible, you usually know what you're doing but I was worried too and seriously, where were you?!"
Aomine knew it was coming, so he heard her out; however, he is having a headache now as he waits Satsuki to cool off. He trusts his childhood friend to bail him out, he knows he can, although in that case, he can't (and shouldn't, really) ignore her – despite or because of the headache.
"I was at a friend's place."
"Oh? Okay… Is that friend Kagamin?"
'Huh…?'
No way – there is no way she could know. Tetsu being aware is one thing (because he goes to Seirin often and his friend is good at getting into people's mind and guessing what they hide) but Satsuki either? She does know him better than any other person; however, Aomine has never spoken of his obsession, never intended to.
"Dai-chan, do you… like Kagamin?"
'…The hell?!'
Where does this absurd question come from? It almost makes him sit up in shock of surprise. It is an obsession more than anything else, Aomine has already named it. Is this how it looks to others? 'Ridiculous and impossible.' He eyes her (glares at her) from the narrow space between his eyelids.
"Who would like that idiot? He is a man, plus he is an idiot."
She stares at him as though she has encountered a clueless simpleton. Not long after, the fragment of a knowing grin is beaming on her face – it irritates Aomine, he wants to bash at her, curse the most inappropriate swears and really, more than anything, he hardly holds back from yelling: No frigging way! Though, he does not and will not since he knows he will only prove otherwise.
"Don't smirk Satsuki, it's ugly."
She smacks him as he was sure she would and the previous subject loses its effect, though it doesn't mean Satsuki hits like a petite girl she appears to be. "Not cute at all," his muttering is heard by her.
However, he doesn't have to keep riling her up in order to remain off the topic – his friend is already leaving for her next course. She slows down before coming to a stop and speaks clearly while her back is still turned: "Dai-chan, I will support you no matter what."
The bell rings and she runs off.
His arms and legs continue to twitch as if nothing is said – in fact, the twitches are stronger. The urge to see him is almost unbearable.
His resting place is suddenly deafeningly, ear scratchingly quiet and not at all relaxing as it was used to be – he solely is to be blamed, isn't he?
. . .
His coach is going to kill him, if this sickness doesn't kill him first.
If he cannot play basketball ever again, then it is better to roll off and die anyway.
He is sure Kuroko wants to ask him what he meant. He can't though, because the music teacher came at the right time. It is exactly what it sounds like, in any case.
Kagami purely desires to be on the court at the moment instead of listening out of synchrony instruments – better yet, not play one altogether. He sprints off towards the closest street court when it is break time – not attendance but regretting not playing basketball until he is satisfied will matter when he is lying on his deathbed.
It is so much better to simply jump, to run, dunk, sweat, and even miss couple of shots. He is born for it – basketball is his purpose, his pathfinder guiding him from the sky. Who is he without basketball, what will he do? He can't – won't be defeated by whatever lethal illness he has.
He will jump, carry on jumping until no kind of earthly restraints is able to keep him down. He is the most free when he jumps, most happy, most himself.
Even if the sweat dries and freezes on his skin, and the ball is rolled away after the dunk, he is content. He lets go of the rim, his feet land on the ground with a sating thud as if they might be off of it again any giving second. His breathing is labored, his lungs crave for air and he has to wipe his sweat with the collar of his shirt; yet, they are appeased, his heart and mind.
However, in mere few seconds, they are not.
He looks for the ball; he finds it in the hands of him. He is watching Kagami mutely, has been waiting for Kagami to notice him, apparently. What could he be doing here, in this street court? Just when he has assumed his heart was somehow cured, the accursed sickness comes back baring its teeth. He clenches his shirt.
"Why the hell are you ditching school?"
He asks. Kagami isn't sure from where he finds the dare to sound so inane.
"None of your damn business! What are you doing here? School ends at 3 and Kuroko never ditches any class."
"Huh? Who cares about Tetsu, I came to see you."
Ba-dump ba-dump
"Why?"
"None of your business."
He smirks up at him – Kagami really wishes to pummel him in the face. He is damn annoying, always irritates Kagami to the bones and he is the cause of his mortal disease if nothing else; Kagami has every right to punch him, hasn't he, but he still doesn't because he is more civilized than that.
Inwardly swearing at the civilization, morals and civil rights, he holds out his arm, "The-hell-ever, give me the ball."
"No."
"The fuck, asswipe?! Give me my fucking ball!"
"I refuse. Tell me why you are so angry."
"You're a shitbag, that's why!"
"Hm, then, beat me on the court to get your precious ball back."
He is running past him almost before Kagami hears the declaration till the end; however, it is not the time to be awed by his impressive speed. Kagami grabs the ball right after it goes in the hoop, turns to leave, growling under his breath. He is yanked back though, before he can take more than a few strides.
"Tch, what's your problem? Let's play."
"I don't wanna! Not if it's with you!"
"Why the hell not?! I don't get you!"
"Because!" Kagami shouts on top of his lungs then rambles whatever comes to his mind, "I can't take your dickness! You usually don't even look me in the eye properly but then come and steal my ball all of a sudden! And it's my last moments to be able to play basketball because again you contaminated me with this crap of a heart condition!"
"…Huh?"
Kagami is sure he said a whole lot to process. He takes advantage of his brain having the size of a tiny hamster to walk away; yet, he is stopped once more as his arm is pulled back.
"What do you mean you won't be able to play basketball? What… heart condition?"
His expression is grave (maybe with a touch of worry and sadness), giving Kagami the idea that he will not be left alone if he doesn't offer some sort of explanation.
He needs to be as far away from him as possible because he is yet to let go of his arm and his heart is drumming behind its cage louder and faster – whichever problem he has, it can nothing be benign.
"This-!" Kagami takes his hand to press it on his chest, unceremonious and forceful. "It's not calming down since this morning and I can only think it's because of you since you were the one who was sick last night. Although you looked like you had a cold, it must be something else – something contagious! We both should have ourselves examined soon-"
"Pfft!"
He dares – he dares to laugh at him even in a dire situation like this.
"Yeah, you have a problem. You like me."
He is insane.
"Don't worry, I'll allow you to like me."
"Did you finally lose it, bastard? Who would like an idiot like you?!"
"Another idiot."
His hand sneaks its way up to Kagami's nape. There is nothing he can do, no way could he have guessed what he is about to do and before he's sure what is happening, he is kissed, full on the mouth. His lips on his are as if experimenting, tasting his flavor, registering the sensation – and the kiss is a bit too hard, not at all sweet or perfect but getting just a little hot and it is twitching his insides. Then his lips ease and slowly move – now, it is bursting of swarming emotions. Kagami never kissed before, and though right now another guy is kissing him, what matters to him is he didn't know a kiss could be so captivating, dazzling, melting even. It blows off every other thought from his mind, seduces him, invites him to forget about his anger, the disease, and simply anything irrelevant but except him – think all about him, all about Aomine and only Aomine and the shape of Aomine's lips and the warmth of his tongue.
Kagami kisses back, albeit hesitant at first, to get a better feeling of the kiss. Getting impossibly warmer, tingly and excited, Kagami softly moans. He hears Aomine humming his approval, leaning into the kiss more and pulling him closer, so Kagami has to shove the other away, punch him in the face, curse and yell, "You fucktard!" then run back home.
Abruptly, he is aware of the fact that a person not even generally pleasant ruined an act that can only be done once as a first, should be shared with the one whom is liked, loved.
Even if kissing a guy like him didn't feel terribly wrong or disgusting.
Even if Kagami was getting into it gradually, maybe grudgingly, however undeniably.
He should not have done that, in any case. Aomine shouldn't have kissed him. Why did he, that frustrating blockhead?
. . .
His grandmother is discharged from the hospital.
They are finally coming back home, his family.
The house is simply muted without his grandmother's low-key footsteps wandering inside. Although he has been attending to his grandfather's garden, the green life is as if aware of the old man's absence – the plants and herbs are not as vibrant.
This whole traditional old house misses the old couple. It doesn't seem like a home without them living in it all together.
Kiyoshi, also, has missed them dearly.
He is looking forward to their return, just half a day more to endure, only a few hours before his life is back on its old, exercised tracks.
The only thing missing will be basketball with a void that cannot be filled.
The recess bell rings and Kiyoshi finds himself in front of the gymnasium, where he has practiced every day for the last two years. It is like home inside somehow… It is strange – can one person have more than one home and two families?
He can, he supposes. Even if it is not common, his life has always been just a little bit on the other side of normality line. So, he supposes he can.
"Teppei?"
He jerks in shock. "Riko, what are you doing here?"
"I have PE next, teacher sent me to get volleyball."
"Oh…" That seems to be true; Riko is wearing her gym clothes.
"What are you doing here?"
"Ah, I was just-" He looks around the empty large room. Useless, his arms dangle on his sides. "I don't really know, haha."
"Teppei, are you okay?"
"Yes, I am," and he really is. He has been much better. Though, Riko isn't convinced.
"Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something, Riko."
"…Okay. Is this about your knee?"
"No. No, it's something else-" He stops, suddenly his throat clamps up. Riko's attention on him, she waits for Kiyoshi to find his voice.
Doubts he hadn't before pop in Kiyoshi's head: Will Riko understand? Will she judge him because he isn't normal? Kiyoshi knows liking a guy is not normal, even if that person is Hyuuga, his best rival-friend.
"I'm listening." Riko lightly hits his arm.
So he blurts out.
"I like Hyuuga!"
She is startled, taken aback. Who wouldn't be, if someone yelled their infatuation with another man at their faces? He hopes, though, that Riko's surprise is due to the yelling more than the confession.
"Oh… Okay."
"You-you are okay with this?"
"Why wouldn't I be? Hyuuga-kun is a good person."
"But he's… a guy?"
Riko stares at him then sighs. "Teppei, we are friends, aren't we?"
"Yes."
"But you still think I will hate you because of your feelings? Whom you like is your business. Good friends support each other, they don't turn their backs at the slightest bump. And I am a good friend."
He can't speak, once again, albeit due to a different reason. He nods, eventually, and smiles his thanks.
"Though, I'm angry you didn't tell me sooner. How long?"
"…I'm not sure. Since I met him, it sort of grew. It sounds cheesy, haha. But… I realized I like him when I was injured and he alone came to visit me at the hospital."
"That long?" She glares. "So? What happened?"
"Why do you say something happened?"
"You are obviously troubled. You wouldn't speak to me if nothing happened, though it pisses me off."
"Ah, haha, sorry. But you're right-"
The bell rings to haul the student body back to the classrooms.
"Oh, volleyball! I have to go now but I'll be right back. What's your lesson?"
"Biology."
"Okay, wait for me. I will speak to your teacher, too."
Riko vanishes and he can't utter another word. Kiyoshi has attendance problem, however he knows he can trust his coach to cover him.
He walks to the locker room, plans sits on the bench in there. He finds a stray basketball, doesn't defy picking it up, spins it on his finger, and dismisses any thought – only perceiving a sense of comfort by the relief of concerns.
The spin of the ball is mesmerizing in its familiarity in his hands. Being bounded up with an inflated orange hard plastic globe might be crazy, he is aware, but it is no less arduous to break and hard to give up.
Sullen thoughts are not permitted to fully surface as Riko appears beside him. She is quick to return.
He expects a fire of questions. Riko, though, sits silently; she, too, watches the ball. It is Kiyoshi who eventually speaks first.
"What did you tell to teachers?"
"I have committee work and I need your help."
"Sorry for making you lie."
"It's fine once in a while."
The basketball continues to spin.
"What did happen, Teppei?"
It stops.
"…I told Hyuuga that I like him."
"Really?!"
"Yeah… And he said he will think about it."
"Isn't that good?"
"Hm, yeah." He lightly hugs the ball. "There's someone who likes Hyuuga, a cute girl. She confessed to him, too. Wouldn't-" He gulps. "Wouldn't she be better for him? Hyuuga should choose her instead of me-"
"It's for Hyuuga-kun to decide, Teppei. I know Hyuuga-kun. If he said he will think about it, then you shouldn't give up-"
"I'm not! I want Hyuuga to choose me." He looks in his friend's widening eyes. "But I don't know what to do to make him like me. Why should Hyuuga choose me? Why would he? He can't even stand me sometimes." He takes strength from the basketball in his lap.
He needs it. He needs aid to keep his mouth working. The first time he voices the inquiries in his head and it gets harder to face the reality of his confession as he hears himself say it.
"I tried to avoid him after I confessed because I didn't want to trouble him. I didn't want him to avoid me. I thought he'd appreciate it but he got mad instead. He told me he needed time and he'd always be my friend. It's more than I ever imagined, I was happy. I am happy but…"
"But it is still not enough. You have a chance and you want more than friendship?"
"…I know it's greedy of me." He glances at Riko; she is smiling without pitying, not seem to be getting ready to tell Kiyoshi that he is, in fact, a hopeless fool.
"It is fine, Teppei, you are alright. It's better than you think."
"What do you mean?"
She sighs. "You are important to Hyuuga-kun, you know?"
"Well, we're friends and Hyuuga is a good friend, too-"
"No. You aren't only his friend. You are his savior."
"Eh?"
Riko shifts; she is hesitant as if she is going to share a secret only she knows. "I know Hyuuga-kun from junior high. He trained hard every day. He was very passionate about basketball just like now. But when he graduated… He suddenly stopped training and quit. It wasn't because he disliked it, although he tried to and made a show out of it. But you saw him through right away, Teppei. You made him realize it was fine to love basketball; basketball wasn't only for those with a gift to love. You saved him from his pain. That's why you are more important than a friend to Hyuuga-kun, Teppei."
Agape and voice lost, his mouth has finally ceased functioning.
He did want to help Hyuuga back then, because helping Hyuuga also helped Kiyoshi, he reached a hand. However, deeming him Hyuuga's savior is just…
"You have a better chance of winning Hyuuga-kun. You should give him time but in the meantime being yourself is enough, isn't it? You got your points."
"I do?"
She nods then sighs once more. "You never give yourself enough credit."
It is somehow the end of the conversation. Kiyoshi has gained a lot to think over, and he does and his coach doesn't interrupt.
He has a new perspective – he has hope. Talking with Riko – maybe he should have done that before. He didn't realize his feelings have been weighing down on him as they've been accumulating over the years until he's shared the weight. He has been struggling on his own with his infatuation – no, it is better than infatuation. He now understands.
Thanks to Riko, he now comprehends he is allowed to hope for more.
. . .
That dumbass is running away, leaving him behind.
"Kagami!"
He doesn't even look behind.
"Oi, Kagami!"
He cannot reject him like this. Aomine won't let him. He kissed Aomine back, he felt it, still senses it in the tingling of his lips. He did.
He runs after him. He doesn't stop and Aomine can't catch him. That must be a lie – Aomine is faster. He should be. But he is crossing the street and Aomine has to wait for the passing cars. In mere seconds, he is out of his sight.
'Is he going back to school?' No, the school is about to end. 'Home then?' Aomine decides.
He frets, though. What if Satsuki is right? He has been watching him for how long now – his eyes always follow him, his feet always trail to where he is. However, is it unreciprocated – was he not looking at Aomine like Aomine looks at him? What if he… What happens if Kagami doesn't like him back? He doesn't know.
Despite the gnawing doubts, he runs at top speed to where he remembers Kagami's house is. He gets lost at a few turns but he finds it. He catches the sight of Kagami entering the building.
He follows – he is a second late again; the elevator's doors close. He remembers, '7th floor, 4th door on the right.' He runs up the stairs – seems hours past until he stands in front of his door, out of breath and sweating. This brown wooden door, it looks bigger than he recalls – bigger and impenetrable. As though it doesn't give permission to Aomine, as if it is an obstacle that cannot be overcome-
Aomine rings the doorbell and that impervious barrier opens as it gives a provisional relief to Aomine before it is sealed shut again to his face.
. . .
"What the hell are you doing here?!"
He bangs the door.
"Open the damn door, Kagami!"
"No freaking way!"
"Why not?!"
"Because you're an asshole and I hate you!"
"Then why did you kiss me, huh, Kagami?!"
"I didn't fucking kiss you! You kissed me! That's why you're an asshole!"
"But you kissed me back, didn't you?!"
He cannot deny. It twists his insides and he hates that fact now; however, it is true. He is not sure why he did – why he kissed Aomine back. It is confusing as it is and the only thing in his mind. He didn't need Aomine coming after him to voice them.
"Answer me!"
"Shut up! Stop yelling!"
The banging falls silent. He is surprised – he didn't expect Aomine to actually listen.
"…Then answer me, Kagami."
'I don't know!' He doesn't have a passable answer to give, so he doesn't offer any.
He sits on the floor, leans back, rests his head on the door and asks instead, "Why are you here, Aomine?" He is worn out, as though he has been playing on his own against a 5-men team.
"Because I want to know, Kagami, do you like me?"
"…No."
He feels another bang from the other side near his head, much lower and softer than before.
"You mean it? Don't you feel you anything when you see me, when you're close to me? Doesn't your heart act up only when you think of me, Kagami…?"
"…"
"Stop being a brat and answer me-"
"Don't call me brat-"
"Then prove it. Answer me honestly."
"Why are you asking? What does it matter? You don't even look at my direction twice-!"
Aomine begins laughing, it sounds more than a little hysterical. He is befuddled – the pain and sarcasm he hears are enough to label the laugh joyless.
"Aomine, don't you hate me?" Kagami asks when the laugh ceases – he is relieved, he doesn't have to listen to that pained noise any longer.
"I don't hate you."
"You like me?"
"…Who would like an idiot like you?"
He recalls and it clicks in his head, finally. "…Another idiot… Right?"
Then Kagami laughs, though his laughter is cheery. He sort of understands now, what Aomine said. Aomine, too, joins him with his chuckles after listening to Kagami laugh alone. In the middle of it, Aomine sneezes – it simply makes Kagami laugh more.
"Are you cold?"
"Not at all-" Another sneeze interrupts him.
"Too bad for you. It's so warm in here. I'm gonna make myself hot chocolate."
"Great, your personality actually sucks, you know-"
"I'll make too much, probably enough for two… Want some?"
"…I dislike chocolate."
"Then freeze to death-!"
"But I like coffee. Got any?"
Kagami shakes his head, more in resignation than anything else. He stands up.
Something will alter when he opens the door, when he allows Aomine to get inside now, he is aware. Maybe everything will be different or maybe something little, maybe a sort of emptiness will be filled – but in any case, surely, there will be change.
He isn't afraid of the alteration, he decides; doesn't hesitate any longer, he opens the door and Aomine is there, on his knees, losing his balance since, apparently, he's been leaning his forehead against the door.
Kagami snorts. "Idiot," he claims and turns around, but he cannot proceed any further.
Aomine pulls him, props him against the wall and kisses him, hard and abusive just a little, but passionate. Kagami doesn't ponder when he responds in the same manner. Inside of his head is fuzzy and his ears buzz. He opens his mouth, embraces Aomine, and feels Aomine's arms around him. His arms are strong and thick – he is clearly a man; whether bizarre, Kagami isn't bothered. He is calm – despite his thumping heart, he doesn't worry. He gives a sense of safety and comfort, that Aomine, through his lips. It is new and exciting like the beginning of a good change in his life, like when he has made the right choice.
"Kagami," he pants into his mouth. "You opened the door. You can't turn back now, whatever happens. You can't. Do you understand?" He means as though Aomine cannot let go even if Kagami wants to be out of the embrace. He seems he is challenging Kagami but also giving him one last chance to back out.
As if Kagami would run away from a challenge.
He already likes this change – it will grow to be an indispensable part of his life, he is sure.
He looks Aomine in the eye as though to say bring it, and grins.
. . .
It is a few days later, when he is watching manzai with his grandparents, Hyuuga mails him to meet.
Despite stiff fingers, he manages to reply, mutters some nonsense to his grandparents that he doesn't remember, and leaves. He expects everything and nothing from Hyuuga's text. He has read it too many times although it doesn't imply anything.
"Yo, Kiyoshi."
Hyuuga is, in front of his house, waiting for him with an impassive face that Kiyoshi attempts to read, find an indication about the meetup – no luck. He is left in the dark. Though, he is distracted by finally seeing Hyuuga up close.
It has been four days days since they last saw each other – not because they've been avoiding each other, but because of their separate busy schedule of preparing to be senior high school students.
They walk, Hyuuga is one step ahead just as always. The weather is cold, about to snow, and he can only see the beauty in it. His eyes focused on the other, Kiyoshi's nerves relax as if he is together with his most important person after a long break, and now witnessing his beloved is safe and sound.
It is absurd; he was with Hyuuga not a week earlier. However, he has missed the other, dearly so. Though, eventually, Hyuuga stops. They are at the place where everything has set into motion – the street court they played.
Hyuuga moves inside and Kiyoshi follows him, wonders what Hyuuga will say to him despite not wanting to hear – what if Hyuuga rejects him tonight? At the place everything has begun what if everything ends?
"Kiyoshi…"
"Y-yes?"
"You know I'm a man."
"Of course I do."
"Yet you still like me?"
His heart flutters for a second profession. "Yeah. A lot."
The other blushes and frowns. "But don't you think it's wrong?"
"Wrong?"
"Yeah, because we're both guys…" Other's gaze is averted from Kiyoshi's.
"I… don't know if it is wrong… or what is right, actually."
"You-!"
"I only know what I feel, Hyuuga. And that is… Sometimes… I think about you so much, I can't do anything else. I can't eat or study or I can't even speak clearly sometimes because you're always on my mind. And I'm distracted because I always think of you. I like you so much that it kind of hurts." Like now, a throbbing pain burns inside his chest; he grabs his shirt.
"So-!" Hyuuga interrupts, a permanent scowl between his burrows, giving off a vibe of improbable anger. "So, don't you think Riko is better?"
"…Riko?"
"You like her, right? She's cute and you're always together. That other day, when I heard you skipped a class, you were with her, right?"
'No way… It isn't possible. Hyuuga cannot be…' The other must not be realizing he sounds like a jealous boyfriend.
"And since I'm such a nuisance to you, why aren't you just giving up, huh?! So then I can also-"
He can't help it, cannot resist pulling the other and wrapping him in a hug – he is secretly fond of the thought he is shielding the other from the freezing breeze. "You misunderstood me. I'm not annoyed that I like you. I want to think of you, always! Even if this is all wrong and I am a disgrace to my grandparents, my feelings for you won't change. I'm sure of that. Because I don't want them to."
Hyuuga stares at him within the shield Kiyoshi provides, bewildered and amazed and wide-eyed; troubling to comprehend all of what he heard. He, then gradually, eventually responds by holding onto Kiyoshi.
He is surprised as he half-expected another punch. Though, he isn't complaining.
"Hyuuga, do you like me, too?"
"…Mo~ron, I'm not telling."
"Eh?! That's too cruel!"
"You're an airheaded dimwit, so you deserve it."
Kiyoshi pouts. However, it is hard to accomplish – Hyuuga is hiding his face by burying it to Kiyoshi's parka but his red ears are visible to him. He grins brightly and broadly into Hyuuga's shoulder. He whispers in other's ear: "Hyuuga, can I kiss you?"
"No." He breaks free, turns away from stunned Kiyoshi. He then quivers and blows into his hands. "We should go back, it's cold."
He takes a step, looks around the deserted street before he stops, looks back at Kiyoshi and holds the other's hand. "Let's go, Kiyoshi."
They take a road in the opposite direction of their houses. It is only the first of their long walks as boyfriends, Kiyoshi imagines, and it could not be any perfect than this as it is so much better than he ever imagined previously.
The snow flurry flits around the teenage boys. Their hearts and clasped hands are warm, they cannot be concerned anything other than the other's caressing fingers. They walk into an unexplored page in their lives.
FIN
A/N: So this is the end of the long journey I've taken upon myself over one and a half year ago. I'm incredibly relieved that I saw the end of it. I am so sorry for this prolix wait. A lot has changed since I've begun writing You&I, so the taste of the last chapter might be different from the previous ones. I believe I did my best to keep the same touch to it and protect the innocence these boys have in this story. I hope you'll agree.
Again, I'm sorry and thank you.
