"VINCENT NOIR. WE CAN NOT TAKE IN TWO HOMELESS WITCHES."

"I'm not a witch, you berk. Ellen's the witch. I'm as mortal as your eyes are small."

"Come on 'oward! This might be my only chance to have children Howard. They won't get in your way, I promise, I just- I- They want to stay. And I know how it is not to have a family. And I want to give them what I never had. And in giving them what I never had, I get what I never had. It makes no sense, I know, but... I just want to be a parent."

"It's not your only chance to have children, Vince, don't go off on that 'I will always be alone' kick again."

"It's not that easy Howard."

"Adoptions really hard to get into," added Naboo.

"Adoption?"

"Yeah. I don't really have a working uterus, now do I?" Vince laughed.

"Then maybe you should find a woman."

"That won't really work now, will it?" Vince laughed.

"Oh my God," said Viola, covering her mouth. "I don't think he knows you're gay."

"YOU'RE GAY?"

They all stared at Howard is disbelief. "Yeah..." Vince burst into laugher.

"There's a giant pink dildo in his bedside table, Howard."

"Why were you looking in my bedside table?"

Viola ignored the question. "Okay, besides the giant dildo... on his on his bedside table is a GALLON of Astroglide."

"So I slept in bed last night with a gay man? Great."

"Oh get over yourself. You fancy me, I don't fancy you." There was a somewhat awkward silence for about ten seconds. "Now's the time where you would deny that, but I'm very amused that you're not."

"Sometimes you look so much like a woman that I don't know any more."

"And you're not bumming?"

"No."

"What's bumming," asked Ellen, all of a sudden, peering up at Viola with her giant hazel eyes. She looked so innocent, never mind she was a murderer, she looked like a toddler.

"When two people love each other very much," started Vince, "they hug, and they kiss, and then the boy puts his boy parts up their boyfriend or girlfriend's bum."

"Oh. Okay!" she made a rather contented face, and continued combing her doll's hair.

"Really, Howard." He walked to the cabinet, and stood on his tip toes to reach the highest shelf. He grabbed blindly, not being able to find what he was looking for. "I know my brain cell told you I swing both ways, but that was years ago. I was really just lying to myself. And come on, when I was with guys and girls, I was still a total slopabottumus. Ah!" He pulled down the jar of Nutella from where Howard had tried to hide it. "Really. I'm a bit of a twink as well. Well, I'm a giant twink."

"Don't just stick a spoon in there."

Vince grinned and giggled as he licked the Nutella of his spoon in a painfully obscene way. He held the spoon out to Howard, who declined. "Well then stop looking at me like that. The only way you're allowed to stare at me like that is if I'm licking Nutella of your dick." Vince giggled. "Really, though, it's not that hard to tell I'm a massive gayist." Vince winked at Howard.

"You've always just seemed like a woman to me, not gay."

"Okay Howard. This will probably be the last time I ever show you this. Viola, cover Ellen's eyes." Vince fiddled around in his bag pocket before he pulled out a condom, and ran and got a banana. He tore the wrapper off the condom, put it in his mouth, and started to deep throat the banana. When he pulled it out, the condom was on it perfectly. "Eh? Name one woman that can do that."

"I- I'm very uncomfortable with this, Vince."

"Are you not comfortable enough with your sexuality?"

"No, I just don't want to witness your's first hand."

Vince winked at him again. "You've got to loosen up Howard! Really."

Howard rolled his eyes, walked around the counter, refused to make eye contact with Vince, and sighed. "Fine."

"Fine you'll loosen up?"

"Fine... keep the kids. Keep them out of my hair."

Vince and Ellen squealed, and then ran to hug Howard. Howard smiled at the top of Vince's head, and rested his forehead on it. 'Gay,' Howard thought. 'Well, this might work out after all.'