Love, Lettuce and Locke's Single Malt
Disclaimer: Very much not JKR. Praise her.
Lily comes to work at Peter's restaurant, Herbology, under the enigmatic head chef Remus Lupin. A tale of Love, Lettuce and Locke's Single Malt. RLxSB JPxLE
"Oh, could he look like more of a ponce?"
Nine o'clock the next day, Sirius strutted into Herbology wearing skin-tight black jeans and a tailored leather jacket, with his helmet tucked under his arm, and his keys dangling from his belt loop. He strode straight up to the kitchen, and blew a kiss at an unimpressed Remus. "Hello, darling. Busy day?"
"Nothing special," said Remus, writing out a list of potential new menu items.
"Ooh, are you writing up a new board?" Sirius asked.
Remus looked up. "Yeah. Go and wash your hands, and you can come and help."
"Are you saying that I'm dirty?"
"Just go and wash your hands."
"He's filthy in bed," Sirius stage-whispered to Lily, who was trying not to giggle.
Remus flicked his boyfriend's ear. "Ponce."
"Says you," retorted Sirius, but he went through to the locker room, putting his helmet and jacket away in Remus's locker and scrubbing his hands well in the basin.
The door opened and closed again as Remus edged up behind Sirius, and wrapped his arms around him from behind. He pressed his nose between his boyfriend's shoulder blades, feeling the warmth of his body through his thin t-shirt.
"Why, hello," said Sirius.
"Hmm."
"You alright?"
"Meh."
"Tired?"
"Mm."
"Want to get drunk later?"
"Mm."
"'Kay, darlin'."
Remus rested his chin upon Sirius's left shoulder, meeting his eyes in the mirror before them. "Hi."
"Hi." Sirius's lips were quirkily up-turned.
Remus pulled back slightly, in order to tie Sirius's hair up in a pony-tail. He planted a tiny kiss beneath his ear. "You're pretty tonight."
"Am I?" asked Sirius, pleased.
"Very much so."
"What are you after?" Sirius inquired, his voice playfully suspicious.
"Nothing."
"Then, thank you, darling. You're not so bad yourself."
"Ta." Remus swotted Sirius's backside, before turning and leaving for the kitchen.
"Ponce," Sirius muttered at himself in the mirror.
(-)
"What am I writing?" Sirius asked, rolling up his tuxedo shirt sleeves to his elbows. He was bent over one of the kitchen worktops, writing on one of the black noticeboards with coloured chalks.
Remus handed him a sheet of notebook paper, on which he had listed some new menu items to display.
Savoury
Honeyed Feta Filo Pies, served with a mixed Greek-style salad
Herbed Cream Cheese, served with toasted rosemary focaccia
Goats Cheese, Roasted Red Pepper & Black Olives on toasted focaccia
Pea, Pesto & Rocket Soup, served with ricotta herb scones
Mushroom & Watercress Soup, served with ricotta herb scones
Borlotti Bean Soup, served with rosemary focaccia
Sweet Potato & Coconut Soup, served with rosemary focaccia
Parsnip & Butterbean Soup, served with toasted focaccia
Garlic Mushrooms, garnished with parsley
Herbed Tomato Rice, served with rosemary focaccia
Sweet
Baileys & Double Chocolate Cheesecake
Banoffi Pie, with whiskey fudge sauce
Warm Honey Cake, served with clotted cream
French Chocolate Cake, with clotted cream and fruit garnish
White Chocolate Mousse, with gingerbread people
Traditional Dorset Cream Tea
Homemade Meringue, served with whipped cream and a mixed berry compote
Warm Strawberry Cupcake, served in a teacup
"Don't you make pretty cupcakes any more?" Sirius inquired, after he finished writing it out on the boards clearly yet prettily.
"We don't advertise them, we just have a display," said Remus, tiredly.
"And you make all of this stuff?"
"Well... yes."
"Everything? From scratch?"
"Essentially."
"Even the honey feta pie things?"
"Well, they're very simple. Lily makes those."
"And the focaccia bread?" Sirius asked.
"Yes. I like making that."
"Even the gingerbread people that get served with the white chocolate mousse?"
"Even you can make gingerbread, Sirius."
"I know, but... Rem, that's a hell of a lot."
"I have Lily to help me," said Remus, "and she does a very good job of it."
Lily inwardly beamed at the praise.
"The two of you? Just the two of you? All of that?"
"It's just what we do, Sirius," said Remus, looking oddly at his partner.
Sirius looked like he wanted to retort, but he held his tongue. He patted his pockets. "Back in a sec," he said, taking out his cigarettes. He left the kitchen via the back door.
"What was that about?" Lily asked Remus, quietly.
"I don't quite understand him," Remus admitted. "No doubt he thinks that we work too hard." He turned to Lily. "Do we work too hard?"
"I've kind of gotten used to it," she said, with a smile.
Remus twisted his lips. "Right. We're knocking off early. How's your station, clean?"
"Yep, just need to sweep and mop."
He smiled fondly at her. "You're my favourite little helper, you know."
"Thank you," she said, pleased.
"You want to come around our flat this evening? James will be there."
"Umm... yeah. Sure. That sounds good."
"OK. If you sweep and mop here, I'll talk to Peter, and sort out my better half."
"Sounds like a plan," said Lily.
Remus winked at her, before walking out into the bar to speak to their boss. "Peter, is it OK if we fuck off early? I've been here since 6am."
"Sure," said Peter, easily. "What time are you in tomorrow?"
"Eight should be alright," said Remus.
"See you then. Have a good night."
"You, too." Remus walked back to the locker room, and grabbed Sirius's jacket and helmet. He wandered outside, to stand next to Sirius, who had smoked two cigarettes and was on his third. "You'll turn into a chimney," he remarked, plucking the glowing roll-up from his lover's fingertips with practised ease. He took a puff himself.
"Hypocrite," murmured Sirius, before turning... serious. "Rem, are we short on money?"
"What?"
"Be straight with me, please. Are we in debt or something?"
"What makes you think that?"
"Well, if we're not, then why are you working such long hours? Are we desperate?"
Remus exhaled slowly through his nose. "Sirius, if we were short, I'd have no trouble in asking you to get a job."
"Then why do you feel the need to work so hard?" Sirius demanded.
"Because... I like it here. I want to work hard. I want to make this place good, and have people congratulate me when I tell them that I work here. I want them to say: 'oh, Herbology? That's a lovely place. The food is always brilliant, and all homemade! You never see that these days.' That sort of reputation doesn't come without work." He stubbed out the remains of the cigarette.
Sirius looked at him long, hard. "Are you happy, Rem?"
Remus smiled a rare, full smile. "Very."
Sirius's lips slowly turned upwards into a shit-eating grin. "Marvellous. Let's hop onto Jolene and bugger off to engage in some energetic activities, hmm?" He waggled his eyebrows.
"Lily's coming over."
"Ah, shit, so's James." Sirius contemplated. "You think they'd mind if we snuck away for twenty minutes?"
Remus flicked his boyfriend's nose fondly. "See you back home, Siri."
"Oh, you're cruel."
(-)
"Lily, meet Jolene," Remus said, fondly.
Lily looked at him, a confused look on her face, and then glanced at the black leather jacket that had slung over his arm. "Really?"
"I'm afraid so." He found two helmets, one of which he passed to Lily, and helped her into Sirius's jacket; leaving himself in only his chef whites.
Remus hopped on, straddling the bike, and hooked it off the stand with a practised flick. With a casual twist of his wrist, he fired up the engine; earning himself a throaty, jungle-cat growl for his efforts. He beckoned her to get on, and she carefully slipped on behind him, looking minuscule in his large jacket. Her hands fluttered uncertainly for a while, before he pulled them around his waist.
"Hang on tight," he called to her, over the noise of the eager engine.
She buried her face between his shoulder blades, and felt the cool night air begin to rush over her in a foreign way.
She could feel the warmth of his skin through his scratchy shirt, and his slow, steady heartbeat if she concentrated hard enough.
"You OK back there?" he checked, as he stopped at a traffic light without so much as a jolt.
"Yep," she assured him, not daring to look around.
They set off again, tearing up the street.
Lily focussed on his distinctive scent: crushed pine needles, hot spiced apples, and smoke.
After a few minutes, Remus nudged her leg with his. "Oi. Look up."
"No, thank you," was the muffled reply.
"Trust me." The tone of his request was like he was testing her.
She passed the test.
She looked up, and was utterly astonished. Everything was going by at insane speeds, but somehow it wasn't terrifying. She didn't feel like she was sitting inches from certain death, should Bambi choose to trot out into the road.
She trusted the man in front of her, comforted by the fact that he was confident -or cocky?- enough to wear only his whites.
She didn't, however, dare to glance at the speedo.
"Yeah?" he called.
"Yeah," she replied.
He revved the engine to new speeds, and she hid her face again; not from fear this time, but from the bite of winter chill.
Soon, they reached a town again, and she dared to glance around. Remus pulled up into a tiny car-park smoothly, and cut the engine next to a storage shed.
He flicked out the stand with his foot, and dismounted, as did Lily. He unlocked the shed, and carefully manoeuvred the bike into it, and locked it again.
"How's Sirius getting back?" Lily inquired.
"He'll walk to James's place, and they'll drive over. Do I have to drop you back home tonight?" he asked, as they jogged up several flights of stairs.
"Sometime tomorrow should be fine, if I can crash at your place," she assured him.
He found the door to his flat, and let her in. "Cool." He flicked on the switch to illuminate the floor lamps.
"Very cool," she said, her eyes drinking in his décor. "Very cool indeed."
"Thanks," he said, taking Sirius's jacket from her. He hung it up with hers on the back of the door.
Lily carefully sat down on one of the big floor cushions, and glanced around the bohemian flat. It was a curious mixture of Sirius' luxurious tastes, and Remus' affection for curious, shabby little findings in charity shops.
The only furniture were three low coffee tables; antiques, with little scribbles and doodles on the discoloured wood. On the tables were many mismatched, ornate candlesticks, and overflowing ashtrays, and several teacups, glasses, and an occasional potted plant.
Piles of newspapers and many, many books were stacked up, leaning against the walls, which were covered in a mixture of photographs, paintings and posters, so much so, that the colour of the wallpaper could no longer be seen. A large mirror was next to the door to the flat, but was mostly covered in post-it notes; some concerning groceries, some informing of visitors, but most were from Sirius to Remus, informing him of his thoughts of the time.
"Wine?" Remus offered her, from the kitchen area.
"Sounds good."
He uncorked a bottle of cheap but nice red, and poured out two generous glasses. He passed one to Lily, clinked his against hers, took a sip, and set it down on one of the coffee tables, before disappearing briefly into the bedroom.
Remus re-emerged wearing a cosy olive-green cashmere jumper, and a pair of red tartan pyjama bottoms. He picked up his wine glass, and sat down on a floor cushion.
The door to the flat swung open, and two men stumbled in, laughing at something.
One was Sirius.
The other could only be James Potter.
Suffice to say, Lily wasn't expecting that.
(-)
Thanks to everyone who's reviewed the last chapter: Sparkling Soul, Rargamonster, Raveia, You can run but you can't hide, Anon [x2!], LoveLiterature, Mizzi, TechNomaNcer28, Kimmimaru, CaptainBetty and Raven-of-the-forests. You're all wonderful and lovely and you make my insides melt into puddles.
The marvellous response to this story has led me to plan out an actual plot. Moi. Planning. What are you lot doing to me?
Thoughts on this chapter? (More will happen in the next one, I promise!)
xx
