Author's Comments: Okay, so this chapter is shorter than the other two. But it at least gives some insight on how Tina is able to form a glee club with students from other schools. This is something that I made up, so I'm kind of bending the reality rules a bit. But hey, Glee's done that many times and we still love it. This chapter is going for a more comedic approach because the last three chapters weren't that funny. So enjoy!

Featured Pairings: Tike (Tina/Mike), Finchel (Finn/Rachel), Klaine (Kurt/Blaine), Shanecedes (Shane/Mercedes), flirtatious!Samcedes (Sam/Mercedes)

Warnings: Offensive terms


Chapter Four
I Can't Stand By the Side and Watch This Life Pass Me By
("Happy" by Leona Lewis)


Right after glee rehearsal, Tina high-tailed it to her car (she and Mike were driving in seperate vehicles now) and drove straight to the local library. By the time she got there, it was already a quarter 'til five and Patches, the homeless man who talks to street signs and screams at traffic, was currently fighting with a stop sign because it had stolen his food. She walked up the steps and into the library, which smelled of old paper and carpet cleanse. Placing her books on a private desk, she went and searched through the music section, looking for a specific book.

After passing through Show Choir Competition Songs, Show Choir Legends, and Show Choir Record-Breaking Accidents, Tina had finally found what she was looking for: Show Choir Rule Book. She quickly skimmed through the pages until she could find something that aroused her interest. Since her confrontation with Azimio and witnessing the Jane Addams girl fight, Tina's mind was thinking one thing since she got back to glee, and she needed to look through the rulebook for confirmation.

Finally, she found it. She couldn't believe what she was reading, her heart was beating so fast from excitement.

"Write-in show choirs can be formed and allowed to compete under the signed permission of an elected official, an official sponsor, OR school administrator."

That's when it hit her. She could form her own show choir; her own glee club. It's about time that she had that moment.

glee

Tina sat in the lunch hall with the glee kids that next Monday. Blaine had returned to school, playing it off as if he had just come from a cold when everyone really knew that he had skipped out because of his fight with Kurt, but no one chose to call him out. Kurt was happy to have him back nonetheless, and they were both happily sharing a low-carb lunch with each other. Santana was currently devising a plan with Rachel and Artie to confront Sebastian for stealing Michael Jackson from them, as if the King of Pop himself had been kidnapped. Mike was busy talking with Finn and Puck about football or something about kicking a ball. Sam and Mercedes sat on opposite sides of the table with Sam sitting next to Tina (much to the dismay of Mike) and Mercedes sitting with her boyfriend Shane Tinsley. However, the two were still texting each other, with the big-boned diva smiling warmly as the Trouty Mouth teen sent her a cheesy love text. Tina, however, was busying herself with reading through the rulebook, to make sure she can really accomplish this.

According the offical rulebook, if Tina manages to get together twelve enrolled high school students, regardless of what school they are in, and get permission from a school administrator, like Principal Figgins, Tina can compete in Sectionals.

"This is a great idea," Tina whispered to herself.

"What is?" Sam asked, looking up from a particularly flirty text message from Mercedes.

"Nothing; I'm just reading," Tina replied coyly. Before she knew it, the rulebook was snatched out of her hand by Santana, who rifled through the pages uncaringly.

"Show Choir Rule Book?" she started as Kurt looked over her shoulder. "Why are you reading this?"

"Uh..."

"Great idea, Tina," Rachel said as she took the book from Santana, "There has to be something in this rulebook about stealing set lists and Michael Jackson!"

"Listen Nose Job," Santana sneered at the Jewish girl, "The way you handle a situation with dirty players like Fievel is by playing dirty right back. I say we hunt him down, take him to the nearest, seedy tattoo parlor and have him get a slutty lower back tattoo that either reads Tips Appreciated or Congratulations, You're My Thousandth Customer."

"Something tells me, he already has one of those," Kurt said snidely, making the fake-breasted cheerleader cackle.

"I say we just go in and straight-up kick his stupid, prep school ass," Puck suggested, ready to knock someone out. "No offense, Blaine."

The former Warbler sighed as he played with his veggies that Kurt forced him to eat, a sullen look on his face. "I'm still really sorry, you guys. I thought I could trust Sebastian."

Kurt immediately tensed up, but Santana was the first to talk. "Don't worry, Anderson, we'll show that Little Bitchlet who's boss."

Blaine smiled at the snarky Cheerio as he continued eating his broccoli, although Kurt seemed to have distanced himself from the gel-loving teen, opting to talk to Mercedes instead, making Blaine frown and feel hurt.

"Can I have the book back, Rachel?" Tina asked as the solo-hogging girl gave the rulebook to her. She commenced with her reading, ignoring the food Mike had gotten for her.

"Wanna come and watch me practice again after school?" Sam asked when Mercedes stopped responding to her texts in favor of feeding Shane the remainder of his lunch and simultaneously carrying a conversation with Kurt.

Mike's face quickly darkened, protectively taking Tina's hand in his own before telling Sam, "Actually, I was hoping she would join me at Breadstix. I think it's about time I took my girlfriend out." Mike emphasized the word my to prove his point that he did not like that Sam was moving in on his girl. Tina noticed this and glared subtly at her boyfriend, before turning back to Sam.

"Actually, I have some stuff to do after school," she said simply before packing up her things in her messanger bag.

"What stuff?" Mike asked incredulously.

"Just stuff," Tina replied shortly. "I'll see you guys."

She left the cafeteria by herself, suspicious eyes from the glee kids on her before they resumed with their lunch.

glee

Tina walked into her history class by herself this time. Opting to take a seat next to Artie, who was always the earliest to arrive for his classes. She had been thinking all throughout lunch about how she was going to approach Artie with her idea. For the past two years, Tina had taken the time to notice the many topics going around glee club. Normally it revolved around the never-ending drama that was Finchel, Quinn Fabray and her radical behavioral woes, Kurt's latest bullying drama, Santana being mad about something, or Mercedes having yet another diva fit that usually involved Rachel. Artie normally kept away from the drama, opting to be like Tina and watch it from afar. It was almost like the glee club had their own personal soap opera. They should make a show about this.

Tina did, however, notice that Artie was always overlooked many times by the group, who were so wrapped up with their borderline, emotionally-abusive relationships to ever appreciate the contributions members like Artie, Sam and Tina could bring. It pissed her off to no end, and she knew it pissed Artie off as well. None of them ever took the time to truly get to know the paraplegic teen. They didn't know that Artie's favorite movie was Rear Window, something she had learned when he invited her over for a movie night back when they were dating. They also didn't know that Artie was allergic to blueberries, which she had found out when she accidently fed him a blueberry muffin. And they most likely didn't know that Artie's dad used to be an accoutant at a law firm before being laid off. And yes, Tina knew first hand (literally) that Artie's penis was functioning correctly. None of them knew or cared about any of those things.

This gave Tina the idea that if she were to start her own club, she'd need a partner-in-crime, and who better than the talented Artie Abrams himself?

"Artie, I need to tell you something."

"You're pregnant?!" Artie asked, his glasses making his widened eyes look almost bug-like. "Is it Mike's?"

"Wait, what? No!"

"It's Puck's?!"

"No!"

"So it's Sam's..."

"Artie, shut up!" Tina took a deep breath before continuing, "I'm not pregnant, and why would you have to ask if it was Mike's? And what do you mean 'so it's Sam's'? Where did that come from?"

"Well, Mike was talking to Finn, Puck, and Blaine and I in the locker room about how he thinks Sam's trying to get into your pants."

"Oh, that Michael Robert Chang is going to get an earful from me, but that's not why I wanted to talk," Tina started heatedly before calming down again, "I wanted to talk to you about an idea I had."

"What is it?"

"I'm going to quit glee."

"WHAT?!"

"You heard me. I am tired of the people in glee being so caught in themselves that they overlook people like us."

"Us? I get to sing..." the AV club teen said as students started piling in.

"But I don't," Tina argued. "And despite the fact that you get to sing, you're still unappreciated. Do you ever get a pat on your back for doing a good job?"

"No..." Artie mumbled, "They usually pat Finn's back."

"Thank you."

"But what is quitting glee going to solve?"

"I've already thought that through." Tina reached into her bag and pulled out the Show Choir Rule Book, opened to the page she had been reading over and over, and handed it to Artie.

"Write-in show choir?" the wheelchair-bound nerd asked, confused. "What's this about?"

"We form our own glee club," The former goth beamed widely.

Artie, however, looked at her like she was crazy. Shaking his head, he gave the book back to her and said, "No way, that sounds like glee club adultery. We can't do that! Not after just winning Sectionals. It's too risky."

"Artie, you wanted to do Michael Jackson, didn't you?"

"Yeah."

"And when Mr. Schue announced that we were going to do it, before the Seblaine-gate drama, who did he say would have the solos?"

Artie chewed his lip nervously, before tentatively replying with a weak, "Blaine and Rachel."

"Not you," Tina replied smugly.

"Is it fair that Blaine and Rachel are getting everything, and we are left holding the bags?" Tina argued, with Artie having nothing to come back with. "And what about next year? Is Blaine going to hog all the solos then? How is that fair to us?" Artie looked forward with a sad look on his face. He really did want to do Michael Jackson, and a part of him was disappointed that he wasn't going to sing at Regionals in favor of letting Blaine and Rachel have a duet to themselves. "Think about it."

Tina didn't say anything else on the matter as Sam took his spot between Tina and Artie, smiling warmly at both of them.

History went by as usual, which means that they learned absolutely nothing. And by the time the bell rang, Mrs. Hagberg already fell asleep during her lecture on how socialists and terrorists are the same thing. Tina offered to wheel Artie to his next class, saying goodbye to Sam as he took off for gym class.

"I'm in," Artie said as soon as Sam was out of sight.

"Yes!"

"But how are we going to form our own glee club? It was hard enough getting one person for New Directions."

"I've got it covered, Artie. We're going to gather together other members from other glee clubs."

"What? You can't do that, can you?" Artie asked as he and Tina entered the school elevator that was used for disabled students such as himself.

"Yes with a signed permission form from a school administrator."

"How did you manage that?" the paraplegic asked, intrigued.

"I have my ways." Tina smirked to herself as she recalled how she got Figgins to sign all the necessary paperwork.

glee

Principal Figgins was having a particularly cheerful day. There weren't many controversies going on today, and the school special only gave three students food poisoning, which means that wasn't enough for a lawsuit. Walking merrily down the hallway, Figgins noticed that he was alone. Shrugging to himself, he continued on down the hall, whistling the theme song to his favorite show, Gilligan's Island. As soon as he turned the corner towards his office, he stopped to see a figure at the very end.

The figure wore a dark cape that came down to their boots that were visible from the hem. Long black and gold hair fell between the face of the person, who slowly looked up at the Indian administrator. With wide eyes, Figgins stared in shock to see the one and only Tina Cohen-Chang.

Now previously, he had encountered Ms. Cohen-Chang alone in the hallway twice, both times unpleasant. He had heard rumors that she was a part of an Asian vampire clan, and found himself submissive to her dark soul and intimidation tactics. The Asian girl hissed like a snake as her "vampire fangs" became apparent to him.

Figgins gasped with shock as he held his hands up in defense, looking like he was about to cry.

Tina held out the forms that she had scanned from the library on allow her to form a glee club using other school's students.

"You will sign these permission forms and allow me to make a glee club of my own!" Tina snarled, hissing for effect. "Or I will suck you dry until you are a tasty Indian raisin that I can feast on later!" More hissing.

Figgins fainted from the shock. Eventually he came to and agreed to sign the papers, hoping that it would appease the vampire princess.

glee

"You gotta love our principal's total ineptitude." Tina laughed as she wheeled Artie into his Math class. "Okay, so we'll meet in the parking lot after school. We're going to go glee club hunting."

"See you after school."

"And don't tell anyone," Tina warned, holding out her pinky as Artie took it into his own as a sign of promise. She turned her heel and left Artie's class to get to her own, with a big accomplished smile on her face.

And before Tina knew it, school was over and waiting in the parking lot. Artie had phoned his dad ahead of time to inform him that Tina would be giving him a ride, which made Mr. Abrams hopeful that his son would be getting back together with his former girlfriend. When he had finally arrived, Tina had placed him in the car and placed his wheelchair in the trunk and the two were heading off.

"So where to first?" Artie asked.

"Jane Addams Academy," Tina answered simply as she pulled up to the freeway.

"What?! You're going to get someone from that criminal pit of femme fatales?" Artie asked, terrified. "We're going to get cut!"

"Don't worry, I already have someone who'll be interested," the Asian assured as she drove down without a hint of worry.

"Someone already said they'd join?" Artie asked, surprised.

"Well... no," Tina grumbled before turning to Artie for a split second, "But they'll be interested nonetheless because, like us, they're neglected too."

"Oh boy..."

"Will you relax? I've got it covered," Tina said indignantly as she finally pulled up to the Jane Addams Academy for Juvenile Female Delinquents.

"I hope so," Artie said skeptically as Tina prepped his wheelchair. "What's her name?"

"Her name's Aphasia and she seems like a very sweet girl."

glee

"You a good kid, Aphasia," Jane Addams Academy administrator Grace Hitchens asked the young black girl right in front of her. "Why did you stab your parole officer?"

Aphasia Simmons rolled her eyes as she looked directly into her school principal and glee club director. This was her fifth year at Jane Addams, after being held back during her junior year and Ms. Hitchens was trying her best to make sure Aphasia was getting opportunities to succeed in life.

With a loud, sassy voice, Aphasia answered, "Because Ms. Hitchens, he was annoyin' me. He had da nerve to tell me dat I was violatin' my parole by stealin' dat car. I wanted a damn Porsche!"

Sighing to herself, Grace gave up on the girl. "Go back to class." Aphasia stood up. "And gimme yo' switchblade."

Rolling her eyes, the Jane Addams student handed her knife to her club director and headed out the office.

"She had a damn Swiss knife," Grace muttered under breath as she thumbed the weapon disappointedly before putting it in her desk.

By the time Aphasia had left the office, class had already been dismissed and many thuggish-looking females were litering the halls. Aphasia immediately went by her locker to pack up her stuff. Tina and Artie had entered through the front entrance with every intention of finding Aphasia. They were stopped, however, by a few security guards who told them they would have to go through a metal detector as if they were in an airport. Tina's car keys had set the alarm off, and they were quickly confiscated. When Artie tried to get through, the metal spokes on his wheelchair set the alarm off as well, forcing the security guards to take him away into a "special room."

"Help me!" he pleaded as he reached for Tina's hand.

"I'll go look for Aphasia. You stay there," Tina said as she walked down the hall.

"Save me-e-e-e-e!" Artie's voice faded into the next room and eventually his screams were masked by the constant chatter of the Jane Addams girls.

The girls in this school were frightening to look at. Some of them had tattoos in places Tina didn't know you could get tattoos without risking injury, and facial piercing that made you look half robotic. And some of them looked like men. One even tried to hit on her.

"How you doin', Rice Queen?" a butch girl with cornrows, a lip piercing and a face tattoo that was probably supposed to be on her lower back. Her voice was deep, almost like a man's.

Tina scurried away in fear as she tried to search the halls for Aphasia. Feeling that she would never find her on her own, she opted to look for the principal's office when, as luck would have it, she had found her trying to get into her locker. What Tina didn't know was that Aphasia's locker was on the other side of the school and the Bootylicious Angel was actually breaking into another girl's locker. Tina put on her best smile and approached the girl with a cheerful aura around her.

"Excuse me, are you Aphasia?" she asked with a pearly smile.

Aphasia turned to see the out-of-place Asian right next to her, looking her up and down like she was a dead woman walking. "Do I owe you money? 'Cause I got a gun."

"No, no, no!" Tina quickly put her hands up in surrender, "I'm, um, I'm here to offer you a proposition."

Aphasia shook her head no as she finally picked the lock. "Uh uh. Sorry, Ling-Ling, but I'm goin' straight now. I don't rob banks no mo'. I just hold up 7-11's and da occasional Mickie D's for a Spicy McChicken."

"Uh, no. That's not what I meant," Tina said awkwardly, getting more nervous under the other girl's scrutiny. "I was wondering if you wanted to join my glee club?"

"Mm-mm, sorry Pikachu," Aphasia replied, shaking her head, "But I'm already in a glee club. We even got a name too: Bootylicious Angels. Hey-y-y-y! So, I'll see you, Ann Wu." Aphasia took the purse that was inside the locker and quickly looked through it for cash, disappointed to only find a few dollar bills. She then turned her heel towards the exit with the Asian teen following her.

"I know, I saw your glee club at McKinley High," Tina said as she tried to catch up the fast-walking girl, "But I also saw the way they treated you."

Aphasia stopped and turned at the girl with an accusing. "Who da hell are you, Mulan? Some kinda spy? Are you stalkin' me? 'Cause I ain't no lesbian, and if I was, my girlfriend would be Mexican and her name gon' be Roberta and she gon' have lotsa tattoos and a big ass Adam's apple."

"Um, I'm not a lesbian."

"Dat's too bad, Ching-Ching, 'cause my girl Mad Dawg used to eat chop suey in da pen, if you know what I mean?" This was followed by a maniacal cackle and a playful punch to Tina's shoulder. A white hot pain shot through the Asian singer's arm and she quickly squeezed it to stop the pinching feeling. "Tell me somethin'," Aphasia started, "How da hell can you start a glee club with another school's student? Ain't dat illegal? Not that I would have any problem doing somethin' illegal." Another cackle.

"I got a signed permission slip to form a club of my own."

"And you want me? Why?"

"Because I know what it's like to be neglected and tossed to the side," Tina replied with a sad look. "And I'm not going to stand by watch my dreams pass by me."

And for once in her entire nineteen years of life, Aphasia was ironically speechless. Chewing her lip, the black girl looked around the school to see if any of her glee club teammates were watching before she turned back to Tina and asked one thing, "When do y'all meet?"

Tina smiled to herself.

glee

After some convincing and reassurance, Tina and Aphasia had exchanged numbers and Tina was off to pick-up Artie from the security office. With a traumatized look, Artie sat in Tina's car in silence until they were away from the campus grounds and down the road. Tina, however, elated from her first successful recruitment, did not notice Artie's terrified stance until she had reached the city limits of Lima, Ohio. By then it was already a quarter 'til five.

"Artie, are you okay?" Tina asked with a raised eyebrow as she saw the frightened appearance of the paraplegic soul singer.

"They thought I was smuggling drugs," Artie croaked. "They gave me a cavity search..." Tina scrunched her face in disgust, feeling sympathetic for the poor boy. "If the next place we stop at has a metal detector, I'm staying in the car."

Tina laughed and after a few seconds, Artie joined her good-naturedly. "Don't worry, Artie. Our next stop is too posh for a metal detector."

"Where's that?"

"Let's just say, we're going to visit some little birdies."

And an hour later, they were in Westerville.


Author's Comments: Yay! You know what that means! Your favorite all-boys acapella group will be making an appearance in the next chapter! I love your reviews guys. It makes me glad to know that you're still reading and not bored out of your mind. I hope you guys are enjoying the story so far.