Disclaimer: I do not own these characters; they belong to the BBC, and their respective owners. I really have nothing to do with them… I am not Matt's girlfriend, and that's reaaaaaally sad.

WARNING: Strong language? I tend to curse a lot. Sex? I am very graphic, descriptive and such. Alternate universe, alternate reality, etc, etc. A dark-ish Doctor.

A/N: I am an 11th/Amy Shipper, and I ship them hard.

R&R

The Doctor opened the door stepping aside, so Amy could walk in first. The gorgeous redhead got in with the Doctor right after him, as he closed the door. He went to the console room, and started pulling some levers while Amy simply stood there, she was still in shock because of the kiss. But the Doctor's attitude at the moment was beyond ridiculous. "Uhm… Doctor…" Amelia spoke in a soft tone, almost seductive. He ignored her, all his attention was focused on the screen. She tried again. "… Doctor… What are you doing?" She asked him, this time with her regular voice. "Nothing." He replied a bit coldly. What on earth was going on? Why was he acting like this! "It's about what just happened, isn't it?" She inquired annoyed, probably he was regretting himself, and that's something that hurt her deep. The Doctor ignored her again; he didn't really want to talk about it. His mind wasn't exactly a stable place right now, and what he had just done was… Not a mistake, obviously. But it wasn't right. "Answer me! Do you regret it!" Amy yelled; she was boiling up. Completely mad at him, her anger growing stronger each second he remained in silence. Finally he was able to reply. "No." He didn't even turn around and looked at her; he was focused on the main console. His mind running a thousand miles per hour at the moment, and she was yelling. He just didn't know what to do… Well, he did, he simply wasn't sure if it was the right thing to do.

"Of course you do. I'm just a human, not up to your standards, I get it! Forgive me for being so stupid that I actually thought you meant it! It's impossible for you to wish a human!" Her face was red by the time she yelled this, she couldn't believe it. She just couldn't. "You didn't want me in my room that day, you won't want me now." The poison in that sentence caught the Doctor's attention. Now he was boiling up. "I… Didn't… Want… You...?" He slowly rephrased, turning his head at her. "I didn't want you?" He shook his fist against the console in anger, nothing but pure anger at the sound of that question, a bit rhetorical. "Ah! Amelia Pond! You're so naive! Thinking I didn't want you… Don't make me laugh." He told her sarcastically, with a furious look in his eyes. How could she think that? Such statement broke his hearts. "I didn't want you…" He muttered almost to himself, though Amelia may have heard him. "Oh really?" She yelled back, as she grabbed him by the arm. "Then explain it to me! Since I'm so naaaive." She mocked him, still mad at him. This was out of line, such perfect kiss had become in a bloody argument.

He had to think for a second his answer, he knew it very well; the problem was saying it out loud. "I wanted you then, I want you now." He pierced her with his green eyes, as his hands held hers. "You were getting married in the morning; I was not going to be a distraction, I was not going to be there for you and then disappear. I had to push you away, okay? I had no choice." He took a deep breath, and let her hands go. He was slowly calming himself. "But don't you ever think I didn't want you. Never, Amelia." He sighed. Amy was totally in shock, she wasn't expecting this kind of confession. The Doctor had actually wanted her? Damn! This was brilliant!

"Take me now then." She said carefully, choosing the right words. "Consider it as my Birthday Present… Make love to me." Amelia told him, without thinking. She didn't need to think about it. All her life she had been in love with this man, end of story. "I can't." He said, the pain in such response was pretty obvious. His eyes reflected sadness, and lust at the same time. "I can't Amy, I can't do it." He replied, as he tucked in the loose curls of her ginger hair, slightly shaking his head. A sad expression on his face… "Why?" She asked him, almost whispered in his ear, caressing his cheek. "Because that would be inappropriate …" He started saying, unable to resist himself; he reached Amy's neck and soaked in her scent. She smelled wonderful, the kind of smell that had bewitched him since the very first time. He could feel her, shivering at his cold breath. "You're married." His poor voice broke right after he said that. He tried to pull away, but she stopped him. "So? You know perfectly well I love you, and I always have. Besides, Rory is not here." The Doctor shook his head. "My point exactly. I am not going to make love to you because you're married. You belong to someone else." He turned his head away from Amy's look.

"Don't think of me as an evil bitch. I do love Rory, and I care about him... But I want you." She said, as a small drop of water fell down her cheek. It was a tear, she was already crying. "It's not like I want to cheat on him, is not that I want to have sex with you... That would be so vain." Shaking her head, she wiped her tears away. "I want you to make love to me, because I do am in love with you. I've always been..." She was sobbing by now, unable to stop. She was actually opening her heart to him, she didn't care anymore. It was now or never. "I wish you could stop this... Instead of hurting me. Because you do realise you hurt me each time you look at me like that, with desire and such? Do you realise, you can't come and kiss me just like you did, and say you don't feel a damn thing?" So much anger inside Amy's chest, breathing was almost impossible.

The Doctor could hear she was having trouble breathing, she was definitely crying. It's not that hard to tell. Was there any other painful way to pierce his hearts? Like a vampire, the tremendous pain they feel; Amy's words as the stake. The Doctor bleeding inside; metaphorically speaking. He stood in front of her, and once again held her face between his hands, he rested his forehead against hers; closing his eyes. His eyes wide shut, and he thought about it. He had to choose, and he had to do it fast. Amelia was right, this was beyond a stupid desire. It was true love, impossible as well, but pure at the same time. He wasn't dreaming about fucking her or anything like that. He just wanted to treat her like the princess she was, be half decent with her; given the monster he is. "I love you Amy..." He whispered; his cold breath knocked against Amy's face. Without hesitation she breathed it in. "...More than anything." Finally he opened his eyes. "Forgive me for what I'm about to do." Such green olive eyes contemplated her, holding a sad expression. So old, so damn honest at the same time. He was in love with her, yes. But he was also sorry, because this wasn't the right thing to do. This was him, letting go for once... Even if it hurts someone else.