Chapter 4
Ezra leaned against his car. His arms were on the top of the hood and his forehead was pressed against the driver side window. In his mad dash out of the office, he realized that he had forgotten his keys on his desk.
Why the hell did Debouix have to show up like this, especially now that he was finally starting to get his life back again? He was actually starting to build friendships like he and the Louisianan had once shared. He should have known better. His mother had always told him that friendships made for anything but financial gain never yielded positive results.
"You were right mother," he stated quietly. This realization hurt more than any punch ever could. He wasn't aware that his own fist had clenched into a punching position and started moving towards his car window.
"Nathan isn't going to be too happy if he has to stitch you up," a familiar voice stated.
Ezra turned around to see Vin standing in front of his car. His car keys were dangling on the Texan's finger.
"This is the second time I've had to track you down today," Vin said calmly walking forward. "You left these on your desk." He held up Ezra's keys.
Ezra reached out for his keys, surprised that Vin did not protest. He winced, not wanting Vin to see how much the action had hurt. He hadn't realized until it hadn't happened that he wanted Vin to pull back and refuse to give them to him. The small hope that somebody on his team still wanted him, cared enough to come get him was dashed
"Hell Ezra, you want me to take them back?" Vin asked. Ezra looked up to see a crooked smile on the sharpshooter's face.
"I ain't planning on letting you leave Ez, but I figured giving them to you right away would take some of the fight out of you." Ezra looked at him in surprise. Vin reached out and swiped the keys out of Ezra's hand.
"Better?" he asked.
Vin's ability to read people never ceased to amaze the undercover agent. Vin had read and interpreted Ezra's pained expression perfectly.
"You ready to talk now?" the sharpshooter asked.
"I would prefer not discussing anything until my letter of resignation is on Mr. Larabee's desk tomorrow morning," Ezra answered, refusing to meet Vin's glance.
"After all this time, that's all the trust you have in us Standish?" Vin asked, not bothering to hide the anger in his voice. "We've been through too much, saved each other's asses to many times to let some guy who most of never met come in and start telling stories…."
"What if those stories are true?" Ezra asked.. "I stole money Vin, money that should have gone to deserving men and their families. I used it for my own capital gain without any thought about who I'd hurt." Ezra's voice choked. "Don't lie to me and still say that you consider me a friend!"
Vin paused for a moment than said.
"Did you give it back?"
"Not right away, but eventually."
"And those stories making their way around Atlanta about you covering up a mur…"
"Did Debouix say that?" Ezra asked sharply.
"No, but I remember hearing about them when I went with Chris to help interview you."
"I assure you Mr. Tanner that my honor and integrity would never allow…"
Ezra was outraged when he realized that Vin was smiling. He closed his mouth.
"Hell Ezra, I'm not saying what you did in Atlanta was right. But then we've all done stuff in life we ain't proud of.
"I fail to see what you did that was worse than me," Ezra answered.
"Remember Charlotte?" Vin asked.
"Ah yes, the lovely wife that construction owner who was trying to build those new homes outside of Denver. We did manage to keep that crazy Irish contractor away from their project. I fail to see how your affair compares to my…"
"I could have brought down that whole project and you know it," Vin stated. "And that fact is something I will have to live with." He paused. "But I like to think that the things I'm doing now are helping to make up for it." He paused.
"I'm starting to think that's what life is all about Ezra. Finding ways to make up for all the mistakes we make and just trying to break even when it it's all done."
Ezra didn't speak for several seconds.
"Spoken like a true sage Mr. Tanner," he finally whispered breaking the silence.
"We all know your temptation in life is money Ezra. We all have sins and things we ain't proud of. Mind of as well stay with like minded people.
"Now you sound like Josiah," Ezra chuckled.
"Was that intended as a compliment?" Vin asked.
"The highest I can give," Ezra answered.
"Think you're ready to go back inside?" Vin asked. "Somehow I don't think Debouix came all the out here just to apologize."
"If I remember anything about Paul, I know that he didn't," Ezra answered.
"Reckon we better go see what he wants then," Vin laughed. Ezra sighed and nodded his head. He followed Vin through the parking lot and back up the steps..
"Vin knows the truth and he didn't throw you out on the street," Ezra thought o himself. For a second, he felt like the weight of the world had been lifted off of his shoulders, but then a horrible thought occurred to him. "Vin knows, but he's always been more forgiving then most men I know. What about the others?"
The southerner felt his anxiety grow with each step he took. By the time he reached the door to the office, he could feel the beads of sweat dripping down his forehead. Vin turned around.
"Remember what I said about that whole trust thing Ezra?" He asked before opening the door and walking inside.
Vin's statement only offered a little support and did little to alleviate his stress. He clenched his fists and walked into the office. He tried to recall a time when he had been this scared on an undercover mission and couldn't recall a specific time. He walked into the office. None of them looked happy as they turned their gazes towards him.
"I was right. I should have just taken the car keys and left right away," He looked down at the key ring in his right and wondered if he could still make his getaway.
"Hey Ezra, welcome back!"
"Thank you JD, but…." Ezra didn't get the chance to finish his sentence. Chris was storming down the hallway muttering.
"That son of a bitch! Who the hell does he think he is thinking that he can just…" Chris stopped cursing and a surprised look crossed his face when he saw Ezra.
"Your back," he stated gruffly.
"Mr. Larabee, I…." Ezra said looking down at his feet.
"Debouix want to talk to you alone now," Chris interrupted gruffly. Ezra did not like the fact that Chris was not meeting his eyes. "Best you get in there now before I throw his FBI ass out of the window."
"Yes sir," Ezra answered. The relief he had felt only a few minutes before disappeared. He felt his stomach tighten and thought that he was going to throw up. Chris was obviously not as ready to forgive as Vin had thought. The outburst from the team leader who hadn't been aware he was there showed his true feelings.
"Ezra?" Chris said gruffly. Ezra turned around.
"You remember what I said after that first time you ran out on us?" Chris growled. Ezra didn't wait for a response. At that moment, Ezra wished Chris just would have shot him. It would have prevented the feeling he had at the moment of jumping of the window. He walked into the office before anyone had a change to say anything to him.
When he walked inside the room, Paul was sitting at the table. His face was red and his fists were clenched.
"That sure is one hell of a boss you've got there Ezra. He could give Michaels a run for his money."
"He does have a temper on him. One that I seem to bring to the surface quite often."
Paul looked at him dubiously and then a smirk crosses his face. Ezra felt his sadness turn to anger when he saw the upturned lips. Life hadn't been easy in Atlanta, but it has been bearable. Denver had been well…it didn't pay to dwell on it anymore. Ezra fought the urge to punch the man as he felt his anger grow. Somehow this man had managed to destroy his life twice.
I fail to see how this is entertaining," Ezra snarled. "Unless your purpose for coming today was to continue to make my life a living hell."
Paul leaned back in his chair, a pained expression on his face.
"Ezra, I never meant to…. I wasn't going to tell what happened until you brought up…." he paused, and then pushed a folder across the table.
"What's this?" Ezra asked, trying to appear that he didn't care
"It's the reason why I came here," Paul explained. "Read it."
"Why would I do that?" Ezra asked. He knew he sounded stupid, but he didn't care.
"Please Ezra, just look at it," Paul said exasperatedly. Ezra opened up the folder nonchalantly and started to read the first page. He knew his surprise was evident on his face.
"Remember how I told you that I wasn't happy in New York? Well I convinced the Bureau to transfer me. They are interested in setting up an office here due to the spike in drug and smuggling crimes," he paused and looked at Ezra. Ezra tried hard to keep a neutral face. "I will be in charge of a team of three to four agents. We will be based in Denver, but cover surrounding states and internationally as needed. This is supposed to be an elite squad and I was highly encouraged to hire only the best. I thought that…."
Ezra took a deep breath and looked at the job application in front of him.
"Why would you think of me for this proposed elite squad?"
"Modesty doesn't suit you Ezra. You and I both know about your unique skill set. I've been following your work with this team through the law enforcement circles. You have developed quite a reputation."
"Team Seven has more than one member Paul. The successes do not rest mainly on my shoulders." He skimmed the application and his eyes fell on the highlighted number.
"That may be true, but you played a big part in it. I want you on my team Ezra and I am willing to pay you what you really deserve."
The highlighted number was Ezra's proposed salary. He had to look at it several times. He couldn't believe it.
"As you can see, it is almost 35 percent higher than what you are making with the ATF right now."
"Surely the FBI doesn't approve…"
"Sign the contract and that's your salary," Paul stated firmly. "I want you on my team Ezra and I'm willing to do just about anything to get you."
Ezra looked at the contract again. He thought about the memorable times he had had working with his old friend. They were some of best times of his life. It would be exciting to work with him again. The higher salary was definitely a huge incentive.
Only a few seconds later, he thought about his last year in Atlanta after Paul had left. Although, he would never admit it to anyone he had left Atlanta a broken man. His anger towards Paul had lessened over the years, he would only be kidding himself if he thought they could build up the same kind of friendship again.
"As generous as this offer is Paul, I can't…."
"Ezra, tell me what I can do to show you that I'm sorry…"
Ezra felt his anger disappear. It was wrong to blame his old partner for his own shortcomings. Paul's appearance today only shortened the inevitable fact that eventually Larabee would find out.
"It's not that, believe me my friend. I admit that I was hurt, but that was a long time ago. We were young and both very different people then. There is no use dwelling in the past."
"Why won't you become a member of my team then?" Paul pushed.
Ezra closed the file and pushed it back towards the other agent.
"Please Paul, don't make me explain. I hope you know me well enough to….."
Paul held up his hand and sighed.
"I understand Ezra. I figured this would happen, but I had to try." He chuckled quietly. "Well since I'll be moving to Denver can I count on you to show me the ropes around here?"
"It would be an honor," Ezra answered. "I suspect I will have quite a bit of free time on my hand now."
"Why do you say that?" Paul asked, standing up and taking his suit jacket off the chair.
"Let's just say that Agent Larabee was less than pleased when he heard your enlightening story about my past earlier," Ezra stated and filled him in on the earlier discussion.
"Oh hell Ezra, he wasn't…" Paul stopped. "Wait, you think you're about to get fired and you still won't become part of my team? You really hate the FBI that much?"
"It's less to with the FBI and…." Ezra didn't finish the sentence. Revealing that he didn't think he could ever work in law enforcement without his team again was not something he wanted to admit publically. Again, Paul didn't push for answers.
"These guys must be awfully special to earn that much loyalty you from you Ezra," Paul stated. "Will you do me a favor though?" He waited for Ezra to give his confirmation. "Go talk to Larabee before you decide to clean out your desk."
"Why would I put myself through that verbal abuse?" Ezra asked.
"Just do it. I think you might be surprised," Paul answered. He put on his jacket and held out his hand. "It was a real pleasure seeing you again Ezra. Until we see each other again?"
"I look forward to it and sharing a fine bottle of Champaign at a darling little French Bistro I am fond off," he answered, returning the other agent's handshake.
"Until then," Paul answered walking out the door. "Remember what I said about Larabee."
Ezra was left standing alone in the doorway. He could hear Paul exchanging words with someone, but he couldn't hear who. He took several deep breaths trying to get up the courage to walk out of the office. He wondered if it was possible to open up the window and crawl out onto the roof to make his escape. Paul was right though, he needed to talk to Chris and the others. It wasn't their fault he had screwed up. Besides maybe he could bring a closure to this chapter of his life unlike in Atlanta. He just hated having to talk to Chris and…..
The door to the office reopened and Chris walked inside. Ezra sighed. It appeared Lady Fate had made his decision for him. Chris walked up to the coffee pot and poured himself a mug.
"So, are you leaving?" Chris asked nonchalantly.
Ezra clenched his fists and forced himself to remain calm.
"I'll have my desk cleared out by this evening. IF you don't mind, I'd rather write my resignation letter at home," he answered.
Chris slammed his mug on the counter, its contents splashing everywhere.
"Damnit Ezra, at least tell me it's not about the money!"
"I'm afraid that it was, "Ezra replied, slowly making his way towards the door.
Chris sighed sadly as he reached for the rag.
"I can't say that I blame you, with that kind of money I might even be tempted to.." "I am sure Mr. Larabee that you would never…"but I'm surprised that you are willing to go back to the FBI."
"It took a few seconds for the two men to realize that they were talking over each other.
"Why would I go back to the FBI?" Ezra asked
"Aren't you leaving with Debouix?"
"I can assure you that that I have no plans to ever rejoin that detestable organization," Ezra answered haughtily.
"Then why are you leaving?" Chris asked, his jaw clenching in anger and confusion.
"You have forced my hand Chris," Ezra answered. "I heard what you thought about me and the umm..situation when I walked back into the office earlier.
"What the hell are you talking about Standish?" then realization dawned on Chris. "Aww hell Ezra, I wasn't talking about you. I was calling Debouix a son of a bitch."
"And I can understand that…" Ezra started to say. "What?" was all he could stammer out when he comprehended Chris's words.
"I called Debouix a son of a bitch here for showing up here, making you so upset, and then wanting to hire you for his stupid FBI team."
"It wasn't about the money that I stole?" Ezra asked.
"I ain't saying what you did was right Ezra," Chris answered. "But we've all got…"
"Please spare me the philosophical musings," Ezra answered. "I was already preached to by Mr. Tanner."
Chris chuckled and took a sip of the coffee. He spit it out into the sink.
"God I hope he can preach better than he makes coffee," Chris answered. He turned to look at Ezra. "Then are you're staying?"
"If you can see past all my…"
"Ezra," Chris warned. Ezra shut his mouth. "The boys and I talked and we decided that whatever your decision is, what we know about Atlanta will never leave this office.
"You ladies done chatting in here?" Buck stuck his head in the door. He looked nervously at Ezra. "So you come up with a decision Pard?"
"Is he staying Buck?" Vin's voice called.
"Hold you horses Tanner, I didn't…."
"JD, get off my desk and quit trying to peak through the vent!' Nathan boomed. There was a loud crash. "I told you that you were going to fall!"
Ezra looked at Chris. "Lord help me, I don't know how I put up with all of you."
"You must be some kind of saint Ezra," Chris laughed, patting him on the shoulder. A huge grin lit up Buck's face.
"He's staying!" Buck called. "And a loud whoop echoed through the room.
"We don't have long to celebrate though," Josiah answered. "We've got to get over to the rink for practice."
Sudden realization hit Ezra.
"Practice?" Ezra asked in a shaky voice.
"Yeah," Chris said turning to look at him. "Like we have every Thursday. Look Ezra, if your shoulder is still bothering you, you don't have to play."
"My shoulder is showing no lasting effects," Ezra answered. I just may have invited some unexpected visitors to our practice that I forgot to tell you about."
