A/N: hi! So there was a bit of drama involving this story, probably nobody heard and that's alright. We were both at fault so I think we'd like to put that behind us. Don't ask me about it because I'll just tell you something stupid. So onwards we go. This chapter explains the whole socks thing... partly. Don't own no Harry Potterz.


iv. socks and interrogation;

FORWARD -

The Importance of Mismatched Socks

(part one)

For Lily, wearing odd socks on that particular day had won her a new and wonderful friendship.

For Howie, not looking carefully as he selected his socks from the bottom of his trunk that particular morning had set him on the path to falling in love.

For Marlene, the fact that Lily and Howie had both worn mismatched socks on that particular day had tormented her on an almost daily basis.

It happened like this:

Charms, first year- Howie's robes had been a bit too short for him, and his socks were peeking out shyly. One was red, one a fabulously bright orange.

Lily had tapped him on the shoulder, almost bursting with the giggles she had stored up inside her. "Your socks don't match." She had said as the giggles spilled out.

Howie had gone bright pink in embarrassment. "No- I only- I was in a hurry this morning." He mumbled, cursing his own foolishness. "I didn't realise... sorry."

But Lily had only smiled and pulled up her robes to display her own socks: one pink, the other patterned with little flowers. "Mine don't match either."

And from that moment on, as Lily would say; they were friends.

From that moment on, as Howie would say; he began to fall in love with Lily Evans.

From that moment on, Marlene never did say; everything was a bloody mess.

oooooooo

Not-so-Innocent Interrogation of the Not-so-Innocent

A flick of a wrist, a muttered word, and Damocles Avery dangled upside-down by his ankle. He had not been expecting the attack, and shock was plastered on his face as he revolved slowly in mid-air to face his attacker.

"What the hell are you doing, Potter?" Spittle flew out of his mouth and dribbled downwards to his nostrils. His eyes leapt to his wand- it had fallen from his hand and rolled away with a clatter.

This did not go unnoticed- Sirius Black marched across the room and picked up the wand. With a well-aimed toss, the Gryffindor lobbed it out of the window. "Looks like it fell into some thorn bushes down there. Shouldn't be too hard to dig it out, mind. A bit painful, maybe."

Avery's eyes bulged as Sirius let out a bark of cruel laughter.

James wasn't laughing. Instead, he advanced, keeping a burning gaze on Avery the whole time. The Slytherin blanched. This, somehow, wasn't like the usual. He'd been picked on by the Marauders countless times, as had his friends, but it was never like this. Avery had never seen James so utterly furious. James's was a quiet fury, not an explosive one like that of Sirius Black. When James was angry, something in his eyes went dead.

And Damocles Avery found it terrifying.

"W- what do you want?"

BANG! A Scorching Charm slammed against the side of his face and his eyes watered in pain.

"Where is he?"

Even Sirius hesitated as he glanced at James, which told Avery that he wasn't imagining it. He wasn't imagining it- something was off.

"Wh-who?" Avery's mouth had gone dry; tears collected in the corners of his eyes. "I- I don't know what you're talking-"

"James-" Sirius began, alarmed.

James ignored him. "Your Death Eater friend." He snarled into Avery's ear. "Where's Mulciber? Where's he hiding?"

Heat and cold rushed over Avery in turn. He knew where Mulciber was, of course he knew. And James Potter and Sirius Black knew he knew.

"I don't know!" He cried. Too quickly.

"Liar." James flicked his wand and a surge of paralyzing dizziness passed through the Slytherin. The Vertigo Jinx. All the spells James used were intended to be harmless jinxes, but somehow... he had a talent for making them terrible to fall victim to. "I know you know where he is."

Avery found an iota of courage somewhere and it ran away with his mouth. "Is this about that Mudblood, Potter?" He could barely manage to whisper, but James Potter heard every word.

"Using that word in front of me was a mistake."

And Avery was slammed against the wall with great force. He felt a bone in his arm break.

"Tell me where he is, you piece of shit."

"Prongs, what the hell are you doing?" Sirius shouted, alarmed.

"Hogsmeade-" Avery choked between huge gulps of air. "Farraday's-"

One more wave of James's wand, and Avery blacked out.

When he woke up, somebody had at least had the decency to fix his arm.

x x x

"That was a bit out-of-order, mate." Sirius said sharply, as James collapsed onto his bed.

"Funny, that's coming from you." James snarled into his pillow.

Sirius stared, then shrugged and turned to his own bed. "Fair enough." He left the matter there and didn't move to stop him when he heard James leave the dormitory much later.

x x x

It was so cold that the tears almost froze to his face.

He stood alone on the stone bridge spanning the gap between two turrets, clutching a half-empty bottle of firewhisky. Every few seconds he'd take a small gulp of the beverage.

Rarely, if ever, did James Potter cry.

His shoulders shook violently as he lowered himself down to sit with his back against the railing of the bridge. More tears made their way down to join the icicles forming on his jaw.

It was so cold that James Potter wondered if it would snow. The sky above him was clear of clouds, making the chances of that slim.

One in a million, he thought.

One in a million chance he'd ever again see what he wanted to see most.

He smashed the bottle violently against the wall. Shards of brown-tinted glass exploded in every direction, some tumbling off the bridge into the darkness underneath.

A scream built up inside of him, but the breaking of the glass reminded him of Avery, of his bones shattering as he hit the wall with a sick crunch-

"Potter?"

James twisted around quickly. Of course it was her. Of all the people, what were the chances?

One in a million, he thought.

Maybe it would snow tonight.

Maybe he'd see-

"What are you doing out here?"

The sound of her footsteps drew nearer. No doubt she could see the bits of glass strewn around, the liquid that had pooled in the cracks on the floor. No doubt, if she drew much closer, she'd be able to see the icicles on his face. James groaned and let his head fall into his hands.

"Have you been drinking?" Disapproval bit into her voice.

"Yeah." Replied James sullenly, looking up at her.

And that was his fatal mistake. She was beautiful, with her round, lightly freckled face and small perfect lips. This all made him forget that now that she was mere inches from him, she could see his face in detail too.

Her eyes widened as they fell on the shining tracks that cut through the unkempt stubble (shaving, of course, had not been a priority as of late)

"Er- ah." She gulped, obviously searching for something to say. "You alright?"

"No."

"Right." She allowed herself to drift uncomfortably into silence, and sat down next to him. He did not want her to.

"Do you think it will snow?" She asked, bringing her knees to her chest and looking upwards.

"One in a million chance of that." He answered, and she looked at him oddly.

"Don't you ever think that the less likely something seems to be, the more likely it really is?" Lily said vaguely. "Just have to believe."

"I'm done believing." James blurted, his voice shaking a fraction. "There's nothing to believe in."

She regarded him with a small smile. "I don't know about that, Potter."

"Oh, yeah?"

"I believe Gryffindor's going to obliterate Hufflepuff next game, for one thing."

James felt the corners of his mouth turn upwards and wondered how that had happened. "You know, pretty sure I believe that too."

"Gingerbread man?" She held one up, seemingly having procured it from thin air. "My mum sent them."

"Thanks." He took it curiously. "Doesn't it move? How can it be a Gingerbread Man if it doesn't move?"

Lily goggled at him, then laughed. "Muggleborn, remember? Wizards eat them alive? That seems rather cruel."

"It's not alive. Just moving around a bit, you know. Squirming." James bit off a leg. "If yours don't move, don't you have the story? Run, run, as fast-"

"-as you can, can't catch me I'm the Gingerbread Man? It's just a fairytale for us."

"I was going to say 'fast as a lizard, can't catch me I'm the Gingerbread Wizard.'" He shook his head in bewilderment. "Muggles."

"But that's completely ridiculous!" She scoffed in outrage, and he laughed.

She laughed too, and it dissolved into companionable silence that stretched for a while.

"Well," She said, after a time. "If I stay out here much longer, I'm going to freeze. So I'm going in. Good night, James."

"Night." He replied, watching her walk away.

It started to snow.

One in a million, he thought.


- BACKWARDS

The Death Eaters followed them from the ruins of a burning pizza place to the small, cluttered house in Cokeworth.

"Mum, hi." Lily had said breathlessly as the door opened, trying not to think too hard about where she'd just been.

"Scrape that snow off your boots, I won't have it all over the carpet." Rosalind Evans said in answer as she shooed an old and grumpy cat up the stairs. "You too, James."

"Hello to you too, Rosalind." James replied dryly, but dutifully scraping the snow off of his boots before entering the house.

She gave him a grudging smile and ushered them inside, closing the door behind them.

"Tuney here?" Asked Lily, not quite sure what she wanted the answer to be.

"No, she's just left yesterday. You just missed her."

"What a pity." James muttered under his breath, earning him a punch on the arm from his wife.

They followed Lily's mother into the familiar, cramped sitting room- it was made to appear even more cramped by the hundreds of old books piling high in precarious stacks- and they all took a seat on the closest available surfaces.

"Unexpected, this is." Rosalind remarked as she fumbled around for the switch of a nearby lamp. "Is everything alright?"

Lily and James exchanged a glance. Everything was far from alright- the war, the countless innocents who were suffering, Marlene hiding away from the world- but there was no need to let Rosalind Evans know of all this.

"Just saw on the telly-" She was chattering on. "Those rioters burned down a Pizza Pagoda up in Birmingham… that didn't have anything to do with-" She lowered her voice, glancing around worriedly. "-wizards, now, did it?"

"No, I don't think so." Lily lied. She could feel, rather than see, James glance at her sharply. "Everything's fine, mum. We just thought we'd stop by."

The lines in her face softened. "Alright, well, it was very nice of you to do so. It does get a bit lonely with both of my daughters gone off, Lord knows where." Here, Lily felt James shift around guiltily and she grinned. "Your dad'll be down in a minute, so I'll go put the kettle on, shall I?" She stood up wearily and bustled off into the kitchen.

Moments later, as she had predicted, into the sitting room came a small, mousy man with only a few remaining strands of greying hair clinging to his head. His face brightened as he caught sight of Lily. "Lily! And James! What brings you around here again?"

"Nothing in particular, Dad." Lily replied, getting to her feet to hug him.

"Couldn't stand being away from your old dad too long, eh?" He joked, and she relaxed.

This house, these parents were her childhood. And Death Eaters didn't exist in her childhood.

It was so much easier, really, to push your fears away.

She sat down again, fighting to keep a carefree smile on her face. Fear couldn't be pushed away- it always came back. The hardest thing was facing it with dignity.

"So how's life in- er- was it Goblin's Hollow?" Her dad asked. He never really had gotten used to the fact that Lily's world was completely different from his own.

"Godric's." James corrected with a smile. "And it's been quite nice, hasn't it, Lily? A bit dull, but we could do without any excitement."

Lily nodded in vague agreement.

The doorbell rang.

"I'll get it!" They heard her mum yell from the kitchen. She hurried past towards the front door.

"Good; I wasn't going to stand up anyway." Her dad mumbled.

Lily only heard the door opening and a small yelp from the hall before she knew something was wrong.

And then it all exploded.

Fire, fire like the one that had ravaged the pizza place earlier now tore hungrily at the walls of her childhood home. She saw the flashes of green light- two, one after the other- and a scream tore past her lips. She wasn't sure who had been killed, but she could plainly see the second of the two bodies falling across the first, both bathed in the glow cast by the flames. And she saw the Death Eaters- tall, masked, dark; they had never been so utterly frightening before.

Lily screamed and screamed until her throat felt as though it had been ripped out. The moments dragged by so slowly, yet time rushed past her in a blur of confusion…

Someone grabbed her arm and turned her around. She knew the body, knew the person it belonged to. James. James was alive. For a second, that sustained her, but then she realised what it meant. It meant her parents-

The feeling of side-along apparition took over her senses, and before she knew it she stood with James, outside of their home. A small breeze picked up somewhere by their feet.

It was eerily quiet after the chaos they had left behind. The glow of the streetlamps glinted off the snow around them, but it was nothing like the hungry, devouring flames that were now consuming her parents' home.

And it hit her.

Mum and Dad. Rosalind and Graham Evans. Her home in Cokeworth- the room she'd shared with Petunia, one half covered in posters of assorted pop stars and actors, the other still exactly as it had been decorated by an eleven-year-old Lily… her Barbies were still lined up in the corner…

Mum and Dad.

A sob escaped her, and she stumbled into James.

"Oh my god…" She whispered into his neck. "Oh my god."

Her eyes would not close- she knew that if they did close, she'd only relive the horror over and over again, see the destruction of her childhood on an endless loop.

Instead, she stared out into the darkness, wide-eyed, unblinking, trying to focus on the powdered snow shifting around in the wind. It blew towards them and clung to their clothes and hair.

"Lily," James said gently.

"James." She replied, making an attempt to keep her voice calm. "Let's go inside."

They did, the process taking longer than usual as Lily kept fumbling with the lock.

It was so much easier, she thought, to push regret away.

Having left their shoes by the door of her parents' house, the snow had completely soaked through their socks and frozen their feet. Lily kept her mind on this, on the cold ache of her skin.

No, she would tell herself whenever the thought pushed, like an air-filled bubble, to the surface of her thoughts. No, no, no, no.

James entered her field of vision and the sight of him made her feel a fraction better. Whatever else she was doing, she knew it would be a mistake to push him away now as well.

She wasn't one for repeating the mistakes of others.

Lily took a deep breath and sat down, peeling her sodden socks away from her feet. A warmth charm and a quick dry charm later, she could barely remember the cold.

The physical one, at least.

There was one last thing to do, she realised, before pushing it all away completely.

She had to write to Petunia.

"I have to write to Petunia." She said, her voice oddly calm.

James nodded silently and pushed a piece of paper and quill towards her.

"Ink?" She prompted.

He pushed that towards her too.

Lily dipped the quill in the inkwell and began to write. She was amazed at how easily it all flowed out- she had no hesitations, no pauses as she scratched out the terrible news for her sister. It was only when the parchment became dotted with tears that she realised that she was finally crying.

So much for pushing it away.

She signed the letter with a shaking hand and sat back, taking a deep gulp of air. "That helped."

James reached over and squeezed her hand comfortingly. "I'll understand if you want to be alone, Lily."

"No! No- I mean, I don't want to." She wiped at her eyes and gave him a shaky smile. "Be alone, that is. Stay with me, please?"

Regret couldn't be pushed away, after all- it always came back. But Lily was wise to the fact that she couldn't face it alone.