I apologize in advance for my Brittany. I just could never really capture her genius way of speaking. So Sorry! Don't hate me.

Chapter 4

"Quinn, Baby. It's honestly not that bad. We have been caught in more compromising positions." Rachel paused, running a hand through her hair. Quinn had locked herself in their upstairs bathroom. "And by worse people." She leaned against the door frame and thought back.

Kurt, Rachel and Quinn were, once in a very small blue moon, roommates. And poor, unfortunate Kurt had been the one to walk in on one of their more risque fantasies.

It had started out as a simple, "Hey let's cook dinner together." That ended in a messy kitchen, one scared gay man and two embarrassed lesbians. Oh and a fear of whipped cream accompanied by lots of therapy.

Rachel had sent Kurt out to the store to pick up their missing ingredients. And as soon as his car left the driveway, she advanced on her girlfriend.

"Um, Rach. I don't think we have time for this." Quinn locked her eyes with Rachel while slowly backing away. She never trusted how fast they could grow dark. Especially when kitchens were involved.

"Oh please." Rachel replied, backing her girlfriend into the counter. "I sent him on a wild goose chase. All the vegan ingredients we need are across town." She glanced towards the clock. "And it's rush hour." She leaned up towards Quinn, her breath ghosting over her lovers face. "So there is plently of time." She whispered the last word before crushing her lips against Quinn. As temptation took over neither girl realized, Kurt knew a shortcut. A very quick one.

They had gotten down to their underwear... Well Quinn was in her underwear. Rachel however was bare ass naked... on the counter top, With Quinn and a pile of whipped cream between her legs. And that's how Kurt found them and was the end of them being roommates.

"You know to this day. He still screams when he sees a can of whipped cr-." Her words were cut short when the bathroom door swung open forcefully. The sound causing Rachel and a few crew men to jump. Stacy looked interested. Quinn looked livid.

"In. Now." Were her only words as she dragged Rachel into the bathroom. The door snapping sharply behind them, baring anyone else from entrance. Quinn quickly made a grab for their mic packs and promptly threw them in the toilet.

"Quinn!" Rachel inhaled sharply."Those are probably very expensive." The blonde rolled her eyes.

"Shut up Rachel and let's give them something they can't record." And she pulled her wife into a passionate kiss.


To say that tonight was going to be an awkward one, was an understatement. Because nothing could really prepare anyone for the monthly Berry-Fabray, Lopez-Pierce dinner. It always ended in chaos and tonight it was going to be captured on camera.

"Santana, I swear if I catch you adding anymore peppers to that pot I'm making you eat the entire thing." Rachel said, snatching the bag of peppers out of the Latina's hands.

"Relax hobbit. I know that you only eat grass in whatever hill cave you came from but spice it up." Santana retorted, sneaking a few more peppers in from her reserve bag. Santana Lopez never brought just one bag to chili night. She had multiple and Rachel was now starting to suspect that the woman had them hidden around her house.

"Santana be nice. You know mythical creatures can't eat peppers. It steals their powers." Brittany said from across the counter, bouncing their daughter lightly on her lap. Stacy, who had been giving her crew instructions, gave the bubbly blonde a shocked look. Quinn appeared next to her.

"Brittany's always been kind of..." Quinn paused lowering her voice slightly so the others wouldn't hear. "Special, in her own way. She may seem like she's dumb or slow. But she's not. She's actually probably the smartest one in this room." She said, watching her second best friend with shining eyes.

"I second that Fabray." Santana said, magically appearing from behind them. Stacy, Quinn and even the camera man jumped. "Now how about we save your kitchen from catching on fire." She pointed to the dish rag that a distracted Rachel had set close to the stove. Hayley and Brittany had engaged her in their secret gibberish language.

"Rachel!" Quinn shouted as she rushed for the now burning dish rag. Rachel spun around just in time to collide with her wife, sending both of them to the floor with a crash.

"Oh for fuc-.. I mean fudge shakes." Santana said with exasperation, catching her wife's eye as she threw the still burning rag into the sink. "Every chili night Berry. You catch at least one thing on fire." She said turning the spout on and letting the water run.

"I do not." Rachel quickly retorted, helping Quinn up off the floor. Her wife snorted.

"She's caught other things on fire?" Stacy asked from across the room.

"Yep." Quinn and Santana answered at the same time. Rachel's glare filled the room.

"There was when she knocked a candle over onto our table while serving the chili." Quinn spoke, now stirring the bubbling pot.

"And other was when she somehow managed to catch an entire actual pot of chili on fire." Santana added, disposing of the ruined rag.

"I still don't know how that happened." Rachel muttered to herself.

"She destroyed an oven." Brittany chimed in, handing Hayley over to her wife. "She fed it too much french bread." Stacy once again stared at the blonde.

"Right! Okay. I think we all get the picture. I shall forever be banned from being around any open flames on chili night." Rachel announced with throwing her hands up in the air. "Can we just set the table and eat?" Dinner went perfectly.


"Glad that is over." Rachel said, making her way into the living room. Quinn nodded in agreement.

"So you guy's do that every month?" Stacy asked as they all sat down for the interview part of the show.

"Yes, it keeps us all connected I guess." Quinn answered, kicking her shoes off. Rachel followed suit before curling up into her wife. Quinn kissed the top of her head softly, causing Stacy to smile.

"I think it's a nice." She smiled even brighter at the couple.

"It is." Rachel replied. "But just wait until next week."

"Rachel..." Quinn half hissed half groaned. Stacy raised an eyebrow. She knew by now that Quinn only made that tone when Rachel was about to revel something.

"What's next week?" She asked slowly. Rachel beamed.

"It's Quinn's birthday. Which means the real crazy people will be here."

"And on camera." Quinn muttered, hiding her face.

There you have it. Another chapter down. Hope you liked it. Remember read, review. You guys are awesome. Glee however... Wtf? Talk about giving you crippling depression.