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A rented family
Chapter 4
Four P.O.V
"Of course. If that would help, I have no problems with that. I was telling you the truth, anything that will make this easier for you or Ethan... I'm on board. What do you suggest?" Was what I said when Tris asked me to meet and greet with her son prior to our trip.
The minute those words made it out of my mouth, it was like a battle began with in me.
The good half believed those words, believed that I could do right by her and Ethan. That part of me wants nothing more than to be on board for good. Honestly I don't even know where those thoughts came from.
The other part believed this will end in disaster. I don't do kids, I don't do relationships. Hell I never even been on a real date. It's all just been random hook ups. I never even had to try to catch or impress a woman. I have never even been in love. How am I suppose to act like Tris is my wife, when I have never even dated? How am I suppose to act like a father, when I myself never had to true father to look up too?
It's no big secret my parents marriage ended badly. Worst than badly. It ended with my father imprisonment and my mother buried six feet under. Not to mention the scars on my bad. God no wonder I'm all messed up.
The two people in this world that is genetically programmed to love me, never really did. My mother never showed affection while I was growing up. She perfected to shop, drink, or have her affairs rather than show me the love and affection a child deserves. My father was too busy keeping up with my mother, catching her in the act, trying to control her, hit her when she stepped out of line. If that is what love is.. Than why bother even trying?
The last thing I want is to mess up with Tris and Ethan. There is just too much at stake, not only them as people, but this account, not to mention I might loose Tris all together.
I reach for my phone, I need to know how to handle all of this. I also know that I will never hear the end of it by asking. But the one out weighs the other.
*****************What Shauna says will be in bold words. Four's will be normal***************
Ring Ring Ring
"Hi Four." Shauna greets.
"Hey Shauna." I greet right back.
"Whats up? Are you getting ready for our trip" Shauna asks.
"That kinda why I'm calling?" I say in a questioning form.
"Oh is the big bad Four needing some advice?" She jokes.
"Shauna." I warn her. I so want nothing more than to hang up.
"So are we asking advice on her son... Or are we talking about Tris?" Is she seriously mocking me?
"Alright. Thanks. Hanging up now." Never mind I can google the damn advice.
"Oh come on Four, I'm sorry. Just this has never happened before. You sure there isn't more to this..." Shit. Am I really this obvious.
"Shauna, I don't do kids! Just give me pointers please. I would hate to go through such great lengths and have it all blow up in our faces all because I don't know how to deal."
"Ok. Well spend time with the kid." Right I didn't tell her.
"Well Tris invited me over tomorrow night for dinner, and we are going to the Park on Saturday." I inform her.
"That's a great start. Wow a park on a Saturday?" What the hell does that mean? I'm so fucked!
"Yea I don't know how to interact with him." I confess.
"Well, he is special needs right? Autistic, Zeke said." No shit Sir Lock.
"Yes and A.D.H.D." I add.
"Ok. Well the key to interacting with any child, is getting into their level and their world. If they like dolls play with them, if they like stars talk about them. When it comes to Autistic kids, they have different way of thinking. They think out side of the box more imagination. So find out what he likes and get into it with him. Play with him. But be observant, children with Autism have trouble expressing what they are feeling. Too much of something can over load him." Oh sure that help a lot. What the hell over load?
"Um over load?" I ask.
"Ok. You know when you are having sex with someone for the first time. You don't know their likes and dislikes right?"
"Um Ok. I'm following you." Relating sex to kids.. ok than.
"Well you have to pay attention to their actions, their noises, their expressions.. right?"
"Ok." I'm selfish in bed. I don't really care what the woman wants, as long as I do what I please.
"Ok. So somewhat the same here. Autistic child, you need to pay attention to their expression, their words, their actions. That will lead you in knowing if something is too much or too little." Ok. Makes sense, I guess. "Just follow what your gut tells you, and what the child's actions are. You'll be ok. Also Tris will be there, let her help guide you. I'm sure she understands that you won't be a expert about her child over night. No one is."
"Ok."
"And Four?"
"Yes."
"Don t show fear. Don't be a dick. But children can smell fear, they will use it against you. Always stay calm." She says before saying goodbye and ending the call. Well that went well.
Tris P.O.V
You would think that today I would be excited, happiest I could ever be. Maybe even proud of myself, seeing that today was our last day of high school. After today I am a high school graduate, today should feel like the start of my life. Instead I am standing outside, my apartment door wide open, fighting with Eric.
"How long? How long have you been sleeping with her behind my back?" I ask him, my blood boiling.
"Two months." He spits out finally not it's not big deal.
"Two months? Two months! Damn you! Why? Why her?" I yell, not caring who can hear me. This isn't fair, how could he? After four years, I have given him everything. This is what he does? Sleeps around with the one person in school who makes my life a living hell! She was just so proud of herself, she needed to make sure to crush me the last day of school. Telling me how they made love near the lake for the first time six weeks ago and how romantic they have been ever since. She just needed to get that off her chest. I think I'm going to be sick, the thought of him... makes me sick.
"Look, I think we need a break. I obviously have grown out of this relationship if that's what you call it. As for you... I think you need to get your shit straight. Grow up." Seriously? Now he decides that? That's right he doesn't know. "Little late for that don't you think?"
"What are you talking about? What more do you want from me?" I see him becoming more and more aggravated, I don't care."I'm pregnant. Dumb ass. Congrats." I spit out hoping my words are a smack to the face.
"No your not."
"I took a test yesterday." I counter act.
"Well get rid of it." He says taking another step closer to me. At this point I know I should step back away from him. I'm pretty close to the stairs. Living on the second floor has always sucked.
"I will not." I say. He cant tell me what to do.
But than Eric places his hands on both my shoulders. His grip is almost hard enough to hurt. "I said get rid of it."
"No." I say through my gritted teeth.
After my last word everything became a blur as pain shoots through my back, my legs, my stomach. The feeling of falling and tumbling take over my whole body. When I finally land on the ground darkness takes over.
I wake up panting for air. I haven't had nightmares in such a long time. But than again that wasn't a nightmare, it was a memory. I can still feel Eric's grip on my shoulders. But I know it's been well over eleven years since that incident happened. That one incident, out of so many others. I take a deep breath to steady myself, telling myself I'm ok. He isn't here. But the truth is it's not the memory of Eric that overwhelms me... it's the grief that takes me.
I decide that sleep will have to wait. Scared of nightmares to return, I get up off the bed. I wash my face of the stained tears. That will never happen again, I tell myself.
I walk over to Ethan's room to check on him. The vision before me has always made me smile. He lies there entwined with his dinosaur sheets, mouth parted open, snuggling with his favorite T-REX stuffed animal. His room is immediately light by his night light that gives off planets and stars on the ceiling. He makes everything that I have gone through worth it. My little man, my eight year old.
The rest of the day continues like normal, other than my lack of sleep. But I don't allow it show, no one knows the truth about my past. I prefer that way. No one needs to know how damaged and used I truly am.
Four had back to back meetings between phone conference with Amar, lunch meeting with our designer on the account Will, and staff meetings. I can see as we approach the end of the work day he is spent.
I knock twice before entering the office, I have gotten into the habit of always never saying a word when I enter in case he is on the phone.
"Yes." He says looking up. I notice he is making notes on the latest design that Will delivered.
"Thought you might need a little pick me up." I say placing a fresh cup of coffee on his desk in front of him.
"I swear it's like you can read my mind." Four says with a wide smile as he takes a large gulp of his coffee.
"Will you look exhausted." I take notice. "It's been a long day."
"Just trying to stay ahead of the game, seeing we are taking off for what eight, nine days. In a week. I need to make sure all is handled. Or else all hell will break loose while we are in Florida." He says.
"Eight, nine days?" I comment.
"Yea we leave Friday coming back the following Sunday." He says. Holy crow. "Any ways are we still on for tonight?" He asks are gaze meeting.
"Are you sure you are not too tired?" I ask him.
"Are you trying to back out?" He counters back.
"Are you answering my question with a question?" I say jokingly.
"Would I get into trouble if I am?" He laughs.
"Alright, you win. Six thirty ok?" I ask before heading out of his office.
"Perfect, Ill be there. Oh and Tris?" He says.
"Yup." I say turning back around to look at him.
"I kinda need your address." He says so obviously. "Can I bring anything?"
"Oh right." I say walking back up to his desk. I grab the pen and post it sitting on his desk and jot down my address. He has my cell number. "Here you go. And no, I got it all covered." I smile and than make my way out of his office.
I notice it's six fifteen, and I am sitting on the couch watching once again Jurassic World for the thousandth time now. I am starting to wish the TREX would just eat Clare and Owen, for the love of God.
Ethan sits on the floor in front of the TV reacting the movie with his own Jurassic world toys. ROAR! Luckily he has already taken his bath and done his homework. I'm thanking my lucky stars that w
e haven't had a melt down yet today.
Just as the Mosasaurus leaps out of the water and snaps Indominus Rex to pull him into the water, there's a knock at the door. The sound of the knocking brings Ethan out of his world of dinosaur battles. As he jumps up curling his arms into his armpits and stomps to the door.
"Hold on buddy, I think that's my friends I told you about." I tell Ethan. I really hope he doesn't bite my boss. He isn't use to people coming over. I take a deep breath and open the door.
"Hey Four, come on in." I greet him.
"ROAR." Ethan roars in his dinosaur tone, tilting his head at the unfamiliar man that appears in front of us.
"Hey Tris." Four says, he looks almost terrified as he steps into my apartment.
"Four, this is my son Ethan. Ethan this is my friend, Four. Can you say hello?" I say to Ethan.
"ROAR!" Ethan says but no longer in a threatening way. Instead he allows his right hand that is still curled up in his arm pit to wave at Four.
"ROAR!" Four says with a smile bending down to Ethan's level.
I can't help but be surprise at how he interacts with Ethan. I always thought Four never dealt with children but he appears to be starting off on the right foot. I glance back at Ethan to take in his expression. To my surprise he tilts his head, like a TREX would studying the creature in front of him. While Four him self tilts his head the same way. Ethan than turns away from Four taking notice that his movie has now ended.
"R-O-A-R!" Ethan stomps his way back to the TV, and picks up Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom and brings it to me.
"Want me to put this on?" I ask. I'm not to surprise, Ethan isn't being verbal to me. When there is a new person his anxiety spikes, he copes by turning into a TREX. He nods his head yes. "Ok. I'll be right back. Make your self at home." I say to Four, while I change the disc.
I figure Four would sit at the table, or on the couch. Never in a million years would I imagine what Four does next.
"Hey Ethan do you mind if I sit with you? I haven't seen this one yet." Four says crouching down next to Ethan asking permission to watch the movie with him.
Ethan than looks at Four, and in return nods his head instead of roaring. I see Ethan is still holding
his dinosaurs, getting them ready for action and battles. But what take me by surprise is that he seems to be ok with Four sitting right next to him.
By seven the pizza delivered, and I serve the three of us on paper plates. The boys never leave the floor as they eat their pizza.
Half way through the movie, Ethan plays with Indoor raptor and TREX. But what amazes me is that Ethan hands over Blue (the raptors) to Four. Allowing Four to interact more with Ethan.
By the time the movie ends it's way after eight o'clock, I tell Four to make himself at home while I put Ethan to bed.
I read him his favorite bed time book, "How do Dinosaurs say Good night?" I turn on the night light, kiss him on his forehead, place his weighted blanket on him, and leave the door cracked open.
When I come back out, I find Four relaxing on the couch. I also take notice that Four as picked up all the toys that were on the floor and place them in Ethan's toy bin.
"Four, you didn't have to do that. Thank you." I say smiling. "Would you like some wine, or coffee?"
"No problem, Tris. Yea, coffee would be nice. Thank you." He says standing up from the couch, walking over to join me in the kitchen. I see him looking around taking in everything. I would love to know what he is thinking. I place the coffee grounds into the filter and push the green button.
"Like what you see?" I ask. His expression is priceless. I reach into the cup board getting two mugs out.
"Yea, your place is just so welcoming. Homey." He says taking a seat on one of the car stools. "I'm sorry. I normally don't go over people's houses that often. They normally come to me."
"I see. Well you are welcome over any time." I offer, pouring the coffee into the mugs and handing one to Four.
"Thanks. Might take you up on that." He says with a chuckle.
"Ethan seems to be ok with you." I say.
"He seems like a great kid, Tris."
"Thanks. He is." I smile at all he has accomplish, Four has no idea the milestones Ethan has had to take.
"Can I ask you something personal?" Four looks at me puzzled.
"Of course." I say.
"Where is Ethan's father?" There it is the million dollar question. I know Four doesn't mean anything by it. Honestly I have been surprised the past three years him nor Zeke ever asked.
"Umm he left us when I was five months pregnant with Ethan. Turns out he wasn't ready to be a father." I answer, looking down at the floor like it's the most fascinating thing in the room. I hate talking about Eric to other people. I would hate Four to judge me.
"So, he isn't in the picture." He nods. It sounds like more of a statement than a question.
"It's better this way." It's true. It is.
"His lost. Ethan is wonderful, his imagination is so... out of this world. It's unbelievable. And you... you deserve better, your amazing Tris. If you don't mind me saying." He says taking another sip of his coffee.
"Thank you, Four." I nod.
"Well, I should be going. I'll see you tomorrow Tris. Or should I say wifey?" He says with a small chuckle at the end.
"Sure darling." I say right back.
"Oh no, anything but that." I see his eyes rolling back and pinches the bridge of his noise.
"Ok, baby." I counter act.
"Alright... little better. Well work on it." He says heading for the door. "Oh by the way, what is your ring size?"
"6" I say, I can feel my face getting hot when I answer. I know I will have to wear a ring, but the thought of Four placing one on my fingers...
"Good. Good night Tris." He says opening up the door and gives me one last smile before leaving.
"Good night Four."
