Three
All at once, I had it all…
But it doesn't mean anything,
Now that you're gone.
—"Doesn't Mean Anything" by Alicia Keys
The Skyloft Penthouse, 145 Hudson, Manhattan, New York
Wednesday, August 19th, 2009
8:32 pm
It was hard to grasp why he had come back, why he had bothered to find her, when for five years, she had thought she had been long forgotten, erased from his memory, replaced by a girl equally as—or even more—beautiful. A girl that could actually understand him, that was nothing like her. She would not be blonde, she had concluded over the course of the past years, and if she happened to be, she would most likely have blue eyes. She would be taller. Her hair would always comb nicely. She would be smart and witty, but also funny. She would have a beautiful smile, a great body. In short, she would be one of those golden girls that everyone seemed to love—one that could easily turn heads even in her worst days. Yoh certainly deserved someone like that, she believed, no matter what he had done to her.
Despite popular belief, Anna had known her fiancé. The way her heart shattered when their relationship ended had been her fault—her fault for getting her hopes up, for even thinking that, while he might harbor some feelings for her, he would want to spend the rest of his life with her. And once he found the perfect girl—a girl that was not her, she would always need to remind herself—he would never make that mistake again. Actually, she did not believe that to be a mistake, in the first place—at least not on his part. The man had only told her what he thought, what he wanted at that time.
It had hurt—terribly so—but then again, that had not been his fault, but hers.
It was amazing how much her perspective over this situation could change because of one simple action. Because if all of her past theories were true, then what in the world was he doing here? Why had he bothered to search for her? Why had he gotten Hao involved? What could have possibly been so important that it had gained even his usually apathetic brother's interest?
Anna shook her head. Those were questions she had no answer to, and she preferred not to dwell too much on them.
A slight shiver rippled through her as she opened the door that led to the porch, causing a gush of cold wind to rush past her and into her apartment; quickly closing it behind her, she stepped outside and slowly made her way towards the railing, leaning against it as she reached it.
Every time she came here, she was reminded of how lucky she had been to buy this penthouse; the view it had over the city was amazing, especially at this time of the day, when the sun burned red in the horizon and the night threatened to take over, casting shadows over the surroundings. The city lights were dimly lit, bathing the darker streets, reflected by the newly-formed puddles that lay scattered here and there. The scent of wet pavement filled the air, accompanied by the sounds of traffic coming from below.
"Such a beautiful city," she mused quietly to herself as she looked down at its crowded streets.
In typical New York fashion, people were bustling around, each of them hurrying to finish their errands so that they could go home and call it a day; they crossed the streets in groups that melded upon meeting, creating a sea of colors moving in all directions. Cars waited patiently for the light to turn green, then drove off, giving fluency to the traffic once more.
"How can it still feel so empty, I'll never know…" she whispered, shaking her head.
It was hard to believe, given the circumstances, but there were times like these when she felt terribly lonely. Like she didn't belong here. Like this place could never become her home, no matter how much she'd like it to. Like she should pack her bags and go back to Tokyo, go back to the Inn where her so-called friends were still living.
And it was the stupidest thing ever, because she loved this place—she loved America, she loved New York, she loved her house.
But even so, she couldn't deny the fact that she knew exactly why she was feeling like this. It was because she missed them. She missed them and everything they had once had.
She missed the big, old Inn she used to call home. She missed her room—the room she used to lock herself into whenever she was angry, sad, or simply needed some time alone. It was almost incredible how much protection those four walls had provided her with.
She missed hearing Ren and Horo-Horo fight and she missed hitting them for it. She missed forcing everybody to do chores around the house. She missed seeing them do everything she said. She missed Pirika's shopping-obsessed self. She missed Tamao's home-cooked meals. She missed Yoh's unsuccessful attempts at preparing something edible.
She missed handing him the list with his training and she missed watching him execute every single command, not because he was afraid of her, but because he knew it was for his best. She missed those late nights when neither of them could sleep and they ended up walking around the park, holding hands like the two teenagers they were. She missed the kisses he would steal from her when in a particular suicidal mood. She missed those cold winter nights when he would make his way to her room and climb under the covers with her in search for warmth.
She missed everything. She missed him. They had been so in love… How could he do something like that? And why?
With a sigh, she shook her head. She didn't have the answer to that question. And she had come at peace with the fact that she would probably never find it.
And because I have recently discovered a passion for architecture/design, you can find pictures of Anna's penthouse on my blog. It's a dream, believe it!
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