Maybe We Could Find New Ways To Fall Apart.
Chapter four: Never let me go
Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I owned Glee, it would air at a much later time and probably on HBO.
Rating – M (T for this chapter)
A/N: Well I'm back. I apologise deeply for the amount of time it's taken to get this chapter up. I went on holiday, and then real life caught up with me for a while. But anyways, thank you for your lovely reviews and all the alerts, my inbox had just blown up with them. I'd also like to say thank you to my lovely beta, for fixing all my late night-I-just-need-to-sleep mistakes, so yes, on with chapter four! Please read and review!
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The rest of the drive to Scandal's was uncomfortable, to say the least. Upon arrival, the doorman barely glanced at their I.D's before informing Kurt and Blaine that tonight was 'Saturday Night Divas' and ushering them in. The club was dimly lit, with disco balls strewn haphazardly around the room, and various drag queens dressed as Tina Turner, Whitney Houston, and the like scattered about. Kurt's eyes scanned the room for a certain green-eyed boy, finally settling his gaze on the silhouette of Sebastian at the bar. As if by clockwork, the taller boy turned at that exact moment, as if sensing Kurt was there.
Their eyes locked, a sensuous smirk on Sebastian's face as his eyes raked over Kurt's body.
Blaine, ever the enthusiast, dragged Kurt over to where he had spotted the taller boy at the bar, seemingly not noticing the staring match going on between his boyfriend and the Warbler. As before, Sebastian ordered drinks for them (soda for Blaine, he's the designated driver tonight),
"And for Lady over here, a cosmopolitan."
Kurt begrudgingly accepts the cocktail from the boy, muttering under his breath something about 'not being a girl', and takes a sip of the concoction, finding it surprisingly delicious. He knew the taste of cranberry had to mask a large amount of alcohol in the drink, knowing he would be well on his way to tipsy after this. He hears Blaine thanking Sebastian for their drinks, before leaving his soda at the bar and asking Kurt if he wants to dance. Downing the rest of his cosmo, he grabs Blaine's hand and pulls him over to the dance floor, where some cheesy eighties music is playing. Dancing closely with the shorter boy, they take advantage of Scandal's being a place where they won't get judged, they can be exactly who they are.
After a few songs, they decide to go back to the bar for some drinks. Out of the corner of his eye, he definitely wasn't looking, wasn't seeking out the boy at all, no. He sees Sebastian and some mystery guy, he's tall and muscular and blonde and ugh, look at his clothes he looks like he got dressed in the dark, talking very closely in the corner, the Warblers arm slung across Mystery Guy's shoulders, laughing. Swallowing harshly, Kurt decides to turn his full attention to Blaine, his boyfriend handing him a mystery cocktail, bright blue in color.
"Relax, it's good. The bartender told me so," Blaine grins, seeing the skeptical look on the fashionista's face.
Tentatively sipping the drink, Kurt relaxes when he discovers the drink, in fact , is very good. He smiles at Blaine, who twines his arms around his waist cheerfully, kissing Kurt's neck softly. Failing to sink into his boyfriend's touch for the second time that day, Kurt finished his drink and dragged him back to the dance floor, where an up-tempo Adam Lambert song had just started up, hoping to distract
Blaine. After a few more songs, Blaine excuses himself to go to the bathroom, leaving Kurt alone in the middle of the club. Dancing alone, he suddenly feels an arm sling itself around his shoulders, startling him.
"Hey, Kurt," Sebastian all but growled. "Miss me?"
He's so close now, Kurt can feel his hot breath on his ears. He finds it strangely comforting and when the tall boy curls an arm around his waist, it feels like home.
"You looked like you were having a grand old time with Mr. Tall-Blonde-and-Slutty over there," Kurt pointed out the guy Sebastian was with earlier, now grinding with some middle aged businessman type.
"He seems like such a nice guy."
The Warbler leaned even closer behind Kurt, his lips ghosting on his earlobe, "Where's your boyfriend?" He knew Kurt was uncomfortable with how close he was, but kept pushing, blowing lightly into his ear as he left the other boy incapable of speech. "Bathroom," was all he could get out before Sebastian bit down softly on his earlobe, making him close his eyes and lean just that little bit further into his touch.
"You know, you could do so much better than him, Kurt. So much better," The taller boy purred, fingertips running up and down Kurt's side. Kurt didn't have the willpower to pull away from Sebastian, and, to be completely honest, he didn't really want to. It just felt so right. "Yeah?" He asked, his voice wavering slightly. "Blaine is honest, crave, and a perfect gentleman. He's amazing." Kurt seemed to be trying to remind himself of that, more than Sebastian. "Who could be better for me than him?"
Finding himself being spun around quickly; so that he and the Warbler were now face to face, feeling a little dizzy in his tipsy state, he watched carefully as Sebastian came closer and closer until they were just mere inches away.
"Me," He whispers.
And in that instant, Kurt isn't sure he remembers how to breathe.
He isn't sure who moves first, but suddenly he was aware of Sebastian's breath mixing with his own, their lips far too close for this to be an accident. Reaching up to cup Sebastian's face in his hand, Kurt stares up into his eyes, so many colors, not green or brown, but a mix of the two. It's beautiful. He's never had to look up at Blaine, and the height difference is something Kurt likes, he's finding. Finally, as their lips move forward nervously, almost touching now, he hears his name being shouted across the dimly lit club.
"Kurt, Kurt!" Blaine shouts excitedly. It's like a snap back to reality, and Sebastian, seeing Kurt's startled reaction, pushes him away lightly, frowning. Great timing, Hobbit. Kurt, sighing softly, waves to his boyfriend as he approaches. Blaine stumbles, giggling to himself, and it's obvious he's had a drink.
"Hey, boyfriend," Blaine croons, laying his head on Kurt's shoulder. He's well past tipsy and Kurt wonders how much he'd drank in such a short space of time. "Nick and Jeff, you remember Nick and Jeff, don't you love, they were at the bar over there," Blaine points to a random spot at the bar, gesticulating wildly. "And we were talking and I may have had a little bit to drink but not a lot, not a lot Kurt, I swear. It was only like two drinks!" he exclaimed, holding up three fingers. Kurt had a very annoyed expression on his face, while Sebastian, on the other hand, was trying to control his laughter at Blaine's drunken state.
"Blaine, you were supposed to drive us home!" Kurt exclaimed, pushing the shorter boy off him
irritably, shaking his head.
"I was just trying to have some fun, and Nick and Jeff they were there, and I was the only one not drinking and – I'm sorry Kurt, I'm sorry." Blaine gave his best attempt at puppy dog eyes, and he knew Kurt couldn't resist. Damn him and his eyes, thought Kurt.
"Ugh, fine Blaine, have another drink, it's not like you can drive now anyway. We'll just have to find another way to get home." Sighing deeply, Kurt wracked his not-so-sober brain for ideas. He could probably call a cab for himself, as his house was only twenty minutes away, but getting Blaine back to Westerville was another story entirely.
"I can drive you." A voice mumbled in the background of Blaine's discussion with himself over which drink to order.
Sebastian.
Of course.
"See Kurtsie, Seb can - hic - take us homeeee" Blaine chirped, completely fascinated with the drink the bartender was now making up for him. "Look Kurt, It's blue. But its green too! Isn't it awesome!."
About an hour and two drinks later (four for Blaine, none for Sebastian at Kurt's insistence), the three boys were leaving Scandals. Hauling Blaine into the back seat of Sebastian's Porsche, figures he would have a fancy, pretentious car like this, Kurt decided to sit in the front, not wanting a repeat of the last time him and the curly haired boy were at the club. Blaine was a little, well, excitable when he was drunk, Kurt had found.
Pulling out of the parking lot, Sebastian drove the half hour to Blaine's house first, with him blabbering on about music and art and Katy Perry and a multitude of other topics in the back seat, and Kurt awkwardly looking out of the window, avoiding eye contact with either boy. It was pretty simple getting Blaine into his house, as his father was on a business trip and his mother would be well asleep by now. Once his boyfriend was settled in bed, Kurt and Sebastian got back in the car and began the drive back to Lima, which would take almost an hour, the most time they would have ever spent alone.
As he clambered back into the passenger seat, Kurt threw a questioning look at Sebastian, before asking softly, "Why did you take Blaine home first? You'll need to drive back this way to get home, won't you?"
The other boy stiffened in his posture as he started to drive. "Because, Kurt, we really need to talk."
Kurt took a deep breath, he knew this conversation was coming, it had to happen at some point, and nodded. Neither boy seemed to know where to start, though. The silence inside the car was deafening, and you could cut the tension with a knife, until Sebastian manages to mumble, "I meant it, you know."
"You meant what?" Kurt inquires.
"You could do so much better than him. I would be so much better, so good to you. Can't you feel it, Kurt? Can't you?" Kurt glances over to Sebastian, his eyes filled with emotion, just waiting to come gushing out. Waiting for Kurt to acknowledge that they are completely and irrevocably tied. There's no getting away from this feeling, this completeness, when they're together, whether they want it or not.
The lithe boy gulped, trying to clear his throat of the lump that had formed, wanting to tell Sebastian how he felt, like the world would end if he were to leave him alone right now, like a million Blaines couldn't compare to what he had felt in the club, mere millimeters away from kissing the Warbler. Instead, he chose to brush it off, like nothing had happened, like his heart didn't skip a beat at the
words he had just heard.
"I don't know what you mean, Sebastian."
The car came to a sudden stop as Sebastian pulled sharply over to the side of the road, turning to look at the boy currently sitting in the passenger seat. "God, Kurt, what are you doing to yourself? You can't pretend this isn't happening, not with me. I know exactly what you're feeling. I feel it too, remember."
Kurt lifted his head up from where he was staring at the floor, awkwardly trying to shy away from Sebastian's gaze. Hesitantly, he turned and caught the other boy's eye, seeing nothing but unshed tears and barely kept in emotions. He tried to say something, anything, but instead he found his mouth was dry, and there was a knot in his chest that prevented him from even forming the simplest of sentences.
"I-I…" He took a breath, his eyes fluttering shut, feeling Sebastian edging ever closer towards him.
"You can't honestly look at me right now and tell me I'm wrong. You can't tell me that I couldn't mean everything to you. You just can't, Kurt." Sebastian leaned in even closer, as he gently ran his fingers over Kurt's jawline, tilting his jaw up so they were face to face, just inches apart.
"Sebastian…" Kurt whispered, hoping that this one word explains something, words he just can't say yet, things he isn't ready to feel.
"If you don't tell me to stop, I'm going to kiss you now."
Kurt froze, like all the air had left his lungs. He couldn't breathe, couldn't move. He couldn't do anything, because he knew he wanted this, needed this from his very core. All thoughts of Blaine, safe at home in his bed were gone, replaced by the intoxicating scent of Sebastian, a mix of sandalwood and cinnamon and something else, something entirely him. It's heavenly. Hesitantly he licks his lips, a silent signal to the taller boy that yes, this was okay, this was what he wanted.
Finally, their lips touched, softly at first, unsure and feather light. It didn't feel unsure to the two boys though, it was as if everything was coming together, like seeing your first sunrise, like the dawn chorus singing out beautiful melodies. It's overwhelming, the feeling of their lips sliding together, Kurt clinging tightly on Sebastian's shoulders as the Warbler gripped his arms around his waist. Tentatively,
Sebastian laps at Kurt's bottom lip, seeking entrance. It seemed to knock Kurt out of his trance, enough for him to realise what he was doing. He gasped quietly, quickly letting go of Sebastian's shoulders and backing away as if he was burned.
"I..I c-can't do this, Sebastian, I j-just, I can't," he breathed, tears silently rolling down his flushed cheeks.
"Why, Kurt? Why!" Sebastian whispered, as he tried to hold back tears of his own. Nothing made sense to him anymore.
"Because of Blaine!"Kurt sobbed, averting his gaze away from the other boy, knowing that they should be basking in the wonderful feelings their kiss brought, instead feeling distraught and confused. He could feel the pain in Sebastian's soul, in just hearing Blaine's name. They're both crying now, drowning in emotions, knowing now that yes, they are meant to be together. Soul mates. Kurt knew what he had to do.
He had to tell Blaine everything.
