++++++++++++++DECK 4.5: THE BRIG++++++++++++++++

Tali sighed deeply, hand on the side of her plated head. Shepard had been gone a long time. Normally, this wouldn't worry her so much; he had often gone on missions without her back on the SSV, but somehow, with Cerberus funding everything, it worried her half to death when he wasn't in proximity for contact. Recently, she had come across a multitude of hidden cameras and comms throughout the ship; Cerberus had been monitoring the entire mission, even from the beginning. This made the whole crew vulnerable; should anyone say or do anything that Cerberus didn't approve of, the company could attack them swiftly and without warning. And there was no way anyone on board would be able to see it coming. Like slaughtering sheep. She shook her head at the thought, trying to clear her head.

"WHAT'S WRONG?" The red quarian beside her asked. "ARE YOU OKAY?"

She was eternally grateful for the volume-control option of her suit. "Yes. I'm fine. Please, eat."

Kal'Reegar nodded, and the chains bound around his wrists jingled as he inserted the syringe into his enviro-tubes.

"WHEN WILL WE RETURN TO THE FLOTILLA?" He quipped as the sustenance entered his blood system, stimulating him instantly.

Tali held back another sigh. He asked this every time. "I do not know, Kal'Reegar. I don't control where the ship goes."

"I SEE." He stated thoughtfully.

There was a dead silence as Tali waited politely for him to hand over the now-empty syringe so she could return it to mess hall and be on her way. But once again he held it hostage.

"DO YOU THINK WE SHOULD ASK THE HUMANS WHEN WE WILL GET A CHANCE TO COME BACK?"

Tali really had no idea. "I guess. But who do you want to ask?"

"THE BLACK ONE."

"Jacob? But he's from Cerberus!"

"I SEE." He stated thoughtfully.

++++++++AIRLOCK++++++++++

Shepard boarded the Normandy with a large brown bag slung over his back. He was bent over at the weight. "Pick up a few elephants on the Purgatory, Commander?" Joker quipped.

"Shut up, soldier." the Commander said sharply, earning a mocking two-handed surrender from the pilot.

Miranda looked him up and down studiously as he past her, and offered a raised eyebrow at the new baggage. "The convict?" She pointed.

Garrus nodded the answer as he followed, just in step behind Shepard.

Upon reaching the Communications Room, he dumped the body bag onto the floor, and the contents yelled out in pain. Jack squirmed her way out of her living area, and glared at the miniature crowd. Shepard had issued a crew meeting to decide what to do with the thing; kill it or eat it or possibly tame it?

"So Jack is a girl. Not a man, despite what her name suggests." Miranda noted. "Though a third option seems even more likely."

The thing roared. "Watch yourself, cheerleader, or I'll splatter your guts all over this ship!" Then the girl's eyes fell on the Cerberus logo on Miranda's shoulder. "CeRBeRUs? I HaTE CeRBeRUs!" And she really did. Cerberus had stolen everything from her. Her feminity, the curves she could have had, and most of all, all chance of ever having a tan.

Before she could start tearing apart the only thing between him and space, Shepard yelled at her. "At ease, soldier! Get a hold of yourself!"

"SCrEw YOu!" She screamed.

"No." Miranda cut in possessively. "That's my job."

Everyone in the room stared at her audacity with wide eyes until her audacity got embarrassed and jumped out a window in shame.

"Look, we all hate Cerberus here." Shepard said soothingly, ignoring Miranda's contradicting reply. "And we all like killing stuff. Let's all be united under these two truths."

Tali had just entered the room in time to hear above statement. She was really hoping it was supposed to be a joke. Human humor always seemed over her head.

"Really." Jack squinted. "In that case, there's a building I want to explode. You in?"

"Yes." Shepard said with his mouth, but his body, his shaking head and thumbs-down positioning of hands, said "No"

Lucky for him, or perhaps extremely unlucky for him depending on the reader's opinion, the only thing Jack was staring at was his butt, which clenched…. And unchlenched.

++++++++INSERT TRANSITION HERE++++++++++

"I don't like her." Miranda announced as she set her tray in front of Jacob's. "She was staring at the Commander for much longer than is strictly necessary."

Jacob stopped mid-steak-in-the-mouth. "Who? Tali? But she's so sweet. And have you seen those hips?" He started taking off his shirt as he thought about dem hips.

Miranda bit into her salad, and swallowed it, though it tasted like rock grit. "That biotic waste of space should be shoved out the airlock." She grit her shiny white teeth. "I'd do it myself, too. If I could only get her alone…."

"Oh, you're talking about the bald girl we just picked up." Jacob nodded. His shirt was across the room on a yacht. His shirt was now diamonds! "Isn't she always alone? Below deck 3, she just sits in her hovel and stares at the wall for hours. Alone."

Miranda's perfect brain took in and began to process this information faster than the speeds brought on by the Mass Relays and began to form a flawless plan. A plan, or perhaps, a plot. A plot for murder.

++++++++INSERT TRANSITION HERE++++++++++

Garrus Vakarian was in the middle of some calibrations when Doctor Chakwas walked in on him.

"Got some time to talk?" She asked.

"Can it wait? I'm in the middle of some calibrations." Garrus replied, jabbing his thumb towards the upgrade platform.

Doctor Chakwas shook her head. "No, it really can't. There's something I need you to do. Come with me." She reached out and gripped his arm tight. "I need you for this."

Garrus, alarmed, nodded. "Of course. I'll just finish up this last upgrade, and meet you… where?"

The doctor shook her head slowly. "I cannot tell you. Just trust me."

The turian was a little weirded out, but nodded anyway, concern being the more prominent sentiment.

This turned out to be the biggest mistake of his turian life.

+++++++++++DECK 2: COMBAT INFORMATION CENTER++++++++++++

The Commander Shepard couldn't help but notice how useless and disposable Yeoman Chambers was. Her "job" could be easily replaced by a small holo computer that said messages out loud. The only thing she beat his current personal computer on was the fact she could be used to draw fire from him for a few seconds before she got slaughtered on the battlefield.

"There are no new messages in your private terminal." She announced. "Tali'Zorah, the quarian, wishes to speak with you."

That statement piqued his interest, dulled though it was by how utterly boring she was. "I should go." And Shepard did go.

+++++++DECK 4: ENGINEERING++++++++

"Shepard." Tali was waiting for him just outside the elevator. "It's good to see you down here." She motioned towards the drive core. "Do you have time to talk?"

Numbly, he nodded and followed her down the hall, trying to keep his eyes up.

"I've taken notice of certain annoyances on board the ship." She said slowly, after they were well into the hall, in too deep for anyone to see. It gave almost a semblance of privacy that Shepard was grateful for. He never seemed to get her alone. "And I know you're very busy, and I don't want to waste your time, so I'll get right to the point." Tali took in a deep breath. "Cerberus covered the SR-2 with bugs."

"Like cockroaches. I've noticed. I know they're gross, but we can get through this, Tali."

"No. Cockroaches? No! I thought bugs were…. Isn't it a human term?" She scrambled for her omni-tool. "I thought the site was flawless! It… Oh. Flawless. Of course." She moved over beside him and held her arm out in front, showing a glowing picture of Miranda Lawson and the title How to Speak to Humans; the Guide for the Less Fortunate Alien: A Flawless Collection of Human Termage. "She wrote it. No wonder you didn't understand. I was talking about the hidden comms and cameras Cerberus had hidden throughout the ship."

"Ah." Came Shepard's monosyllable reply of understanding.

"I'm not sure whether I should strip them all down and risk suspicion and possible conflict. Especially since you're choosing to play by their rules for now." She realized she was standing very close to him, and moved to be across from him instead, glad her helmet could hide her expression. "So, what should we do, Shepard?"

Shepard started thinking. And then nobody could move.

This could take a while so let's switch to:

+++++++THE MYSTERIOUS UNMAPPED AREA OF THE SHIP+++++++

Blindfolded and gagged per the increasingly strange doctor's insistence, Garrus tried to feel his way down the narrow passageway, having only Chakwas' voice to guide him. Suddenly, the human's hand was on his face, right between his mandibles, stopping him instantly. "Sit." She insisted. And he sat, in a rather squishy chair that kept globbing around his self. "You may remove your blindfold." Garrus obediently untied the dark piece of cloth.

"So what's this all about, Chakwas?" The room was pitch dark except for a blindingly bright light about a turian's length and armspan wide. Garrus squinted as his eyes adjusted. Suddenly he seized up, staring in terror on what the screen portrayed. His voice was panicky when he yelled out. "What's the…. Oh no. No!" He heard a hiss and click as the hanger door dropped closed and locked behind him. "No! Noooo!"

But the noise of his cry never left the room.

And he was left alone to stare in horror at the brainwashing terror that is…

….

..

Fleet and Flotilla


A/N: ohhhhh snap. What is poor Garrus's fate? and what will happen to Tali and Shepard now that they're finally alone(probably nothing)? and will Miranda succeed with her evil murder plot? And will Shepard remember that he's supposed to be paranoid? TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR whatever.

HMMMmmMMMmMmm

The reviews last chapter kept me goin. Once again I send me thanks...

But I feel like the story's missing something important... Anyone got any ideas?