A/N: Just so you know, I'm going to be on vacation for the next week. Expect absolutely no updates until then and a ton as soon as I get back! Oh, and just so you know, my original plan for this story was NOT for the entire thing to revolve around babies, but that appears to be the way it's turning out, at least for now. Hope you enjoy!

Finn stepped out of the locker room and looked around in confusion.

"Hey!"

Finn turned around and saw Kurt. "Hi," he said. "Have you seen Sam? We were supposed to hang out."

"I don't know," said Kurt. "I'm just stopping by. I wanted to stop by and make sure that you're okay with Rachel having our baby."

"Um…" said Finn. "Yeah, about that…I talked to Rachel, and I think we agreed that it would be pretty weird if our niece or nephew was her son or daughter."

"Oh, that must be why she told me we needed to find an egg donor then," said Kurt. Finn blinked. This was news to him. "You're okay with this now, right?"

"Um…yes," said Finn. He laughed nervously. "Of course."

Kurt smiled and threw his arms around his brother. "Thanks, Finn! You're the best!"

Finn patted Kurt's back and looked away, not really sure what to make of all this.

"PDA!"

Finn and Kurt both looked up. "Oh, Quinn, shut up!" said Finn.

"Mind telling me why you think it's okay for your football players to be selling candy bars out in the hallway?" Quinn demanded.

"It's fine," said Finn. "I've already cleared it with Schuster. They're just trying to raise money for uniforms."

"Yeah, but they're depressing my cheerleaders," said Quinn.

"Why?" said Finn. "They're welcome to sell something, too."

"But they are not allowed to buy candy bars," said Quinn. "You obviously don't get it. Your players need all the calories they can get. With cheerleaders, it's the opposite. My girls are allowed to have twelve hundred calories a day, give or take two hundred depending on their height, and five hundred of those calories have to be in fruits, vegetables, milk, and eggs. They're allowed to have one spoonful of peanut butter and two cookies a week. Candy bars are a no-no. I should have your players expelled for tempting them."

Finn rolled his eyes. "You know you can't do that. Let me ask you something, how many calories do you eat every day?"

"Exactly twelve hundred," said Quinn. "And instead of cookies, I have spoonfuls of cod liver oil. And I probably work out more hours out of the day than you do. So you shut up. I'm going to my office for a couple of hours, if I see your players still selling those candy bars when I come out, I'm giving them all detention."

"You can't do that either!" Finn shouted after her as she marched off down the hall. He rolled his eyes and turned back to Kurt. "She's something, huh? Although you do have to admire how well she's been taking care of herself."

Kurt nodded. "Yeah," he said. "Very good care of herself."

Finn sighed. "Well, anyways, practice is about to start. I'll see you around, man."

"Yeah, you too," said Kurt. He turned around and walked out of the school, quite satisfied.


"And then she basically accused me of being a racist, stormed out, and didn't come back!" said Rachel.

"That is weird," said Finn as he unzipped his wife's dress. "What do you think is the matter with her?"

"I don't know," said Rachel. "Kurt and I are going to corner her tomorrow before rehearsal and find out. I'm more worried about her than I am angry. She's been acting like this for days."

"I can see why," said Finn. "Why you're worried, I mean."

Rachel quickly slipped into her nightgown. "Hey," she said. "You coming to bed?"

"I will in a little bit," said Finn. "First I have to go knock up Santana Lopez."

"Uh-huh," said Rachel. "Wait…what?"

"Well I figured as long as we're busy giving babies to gay couples I might as well," said Finn. "It's not like she can have the baby with Brittney. All in the name of fairness, you know?"

"Ok, you stop right there!" said Rachel. "First of all, you know damn well that when it comes down to it Santana could walk into a bar and walk out pregnant and would. Second of all, I told Kurt that I can't have his biological child. He's going to find an egg donor and get me pregnant through in vitro fertilization."

"But you are going to be pregnant with his child," said Finn.

"So?" said Rachel. "It won't even be my child. Are you jealous or something? Why? It's not like I haven't already had your child."

"And then after baby Kurtchel pops out, you can have someone else's child, right?" said Finn. "How about Puck? He's always wanted to get into your pants. Plus we already know he seems to enjoy getting the women I'm in love with pregnant."

Rachel was so angry her face was red now. "That…that was eleven years ago!"

"And then what about that reporter dweeb from high school? The one who went along to sectionals just because he wanted to do you after he blackmailed you into giving him a pair of your panties? You can become a whole baby breeding machine!"

"Finn, get out!" snapped Rachel.

Finn blinked. "What? I thought you wanted me to come to bed."

"Forget it!" said Rachel. "You're sleeping on the couch tonight."

"Why?" said Finn. "Are afraid that you'll accidentally get pregnant with my child so that you can't…"

At that point, Rachel practically shoved him out the door, closed it, and locked it. Then she closed her eyes, leaned back against the door, and sighed.


"Mommy, you and Daddy have fight?" asked Destiny from her car seat directly behind Rachel.

"You don't need to worry about that, honey," said Rachel. "But yes, we did."

"Why fight?" said Destiny. "He not sharing his toys?"

Rachel smiled into the rearview mirror. "Something like that. And…here we are!" They pulled up into the driveway of Burt and Carole's house. She got out of the car and got Destiny out of her car seat and put her down. Destiny immediately tore up to the house and rang the doorbell until Rachel told her to stop. "Gramma!" said Destiny as soon as Carole Hummel opened the door. "I didn't tell Mommy about the cookies!"

"What?" said Rachel.

Destiny looked away. "Nothin'."

"It was just a one time thing," Carole explained quickly. "I hope you don't mind."

"It's fine," said Rachel. That was the last thing on her mind

Carole looked at her. "What's wrong, sweetheart?"

"Mommy and Daddy had fight," said Destiny. "He wasn't sharing." Then she tore down the hallway and into Burt's office.

"It's nothing," said Rachel quietly. "I just decided to do something perfectly reasonable that Finn can't stand and he acted like he was going to go do something ridiculous that he would never actually do, and then he started complaining about a bunch of other stuff that nobody cares about anymore and just…being completely juvinile!" Then she stopped, wondering if she'd already said too much.

Carole smiled. "When I started going out with Burt, Finn pretended that he was going to flush his dad's ashes down the toilet. Whenever he hates what's going on and doesn't know what to do about it, he starts acting like a child. That's the way that all men are."

"Not Burt," said Rachel.

Carole's smile grew a little. "He's older. It'll be fine, Rachel. You and Finn love each other too much for one of you not to cave in soon enough."

"Is everything okay?" asked Burt, coming into view with Destiny clinging to his back like a monkey.

"It's fine, honey," said Carole reassuringly. Rachel smiled at her.

"We going to the park!" said Destiny.

"Have fun," said Rachel, giving her daughter a kiss on the cheek.

"Hey, Rachel," said Burt.

"How are you doing?" said Rachel.

"Great," said Burt. "Tell Finn to stop by sometime, will you?"

"Sure," said Rachel. "I've got to get going now. I'll see you guys tonight!"

On the way out to the practice studio, all Rachel could think about was how perfect Burt and Carole's relationship was and how that was exactly what she hoped she and Finn could be like someday-minus the part about them both having deceased spouses and having taken so long to meet each other, of course. They'd had their tenth anniversary a year ago, but the way they were with each other you would think that they'd been together forever.

Then Rachel started wondering what exactly it was that they were doing right. Part of it was the fact that they understood each other so well, having both spent so much of their lives struggling as single parents and in mourning over their other half. That was something that she and Finn undoubtedly had-they had shared so much of their lives with each other that it was impossible for her to imagine being with someone else.

But Rachel had a feeling that there was more to it than that.

Kurt's car was already parked outside the practice studio when Rachel got there. So saw Santana and Brittney's. "Hey," said Kurt. "I sent Brittana inside to go over their parts for 'Hello'."

"Is Mercedes here yet?" asked Rachel.

"No," said Kurt. "Wait, there she comes."

They both stood there and watched as her car pulled up and she got out. "Oh, now what?" said Mercedes.

Rachel took a deep breath. "Mercedes, um…"

"Cut the crap and tell us what's going on," Kurt cut in.

"Yeah, that," said Rachel.

Mercedes sighed and already looked slightly defeated when she said, "Why can't you guys just leave me alone?"

"Because we care about you!" said Rachel and Kurt in unison.

"If we didn't, one of us probably would have smacked you by now," said Rachel.

"Or at least busted your car windows," said Kurt.

"Huh?" said Rachel.

"Never mind," said Kurt.

"You guys, I'm pregnant!"

Rachel blinked her eyes in shock. "What? Since when?"

"Five weeks," said Mercedes. She already had tears running down her face. "I wasn't planning this."

"Come here," whispered Rachel. She put her arms around Mercedes and started patting her back.

"I don't think I can go through with this," said Mercedes. "I don't think I can have this baby."

"What?" said Rachel. "I wouldn't do that if I were you. I've known people who've ended their pregnancies, and they live with that regret for the rest of their lives."

"I've thought about that, okay?" said Mercedes. "There's just no easy way out!" Then she started crying even harder.

"Rachel, I have to go."

Rachel whipped her head around just in time to catch sight of Kurt's disappearing back heading towards his car. It took her about two seconds to realize why he was leaving. Of course. He wanted to become a father so badly, and here was one of their best friends who had not only gotten pregnant without even trying, but was miserable about it. Rachel bit her lip. This situation had just gone from being not easy to being completely impossible.


Quinn Fabray, also known Coach Fabray among the students and Crazy Quinn among most of the rest of the faculty, was going through the bin of pompoms in her closet and trying to determine which of them were too frayed to use anymore. There were more than fifty of them in the bin. "This is ridiculous!" she snapped. "I shouldn't be doing this!" Coach Sylvester would undoubtedly have the cheerleaders doing this for her. And plus…what a pathetic thing for her life to have come down to. She was supposed to have made something of her life, not spent it sorting pompoms.

"Need some help?"

Quinn looked up. Kurt was standing there. She hadn't spoken to him since they exchanged a fairly formal greeting at Finn and Rachel's wedding. "What are you doing here?" she said. "This is my office, Finn's is across the hall."

"I know," said Kurt. "I came here to see you."

Quinn blinked. "Really? Why?"

"I just happened to come across these," said Kurt, pulling two tickets out of his sleeve. "And thought of you."

Quinn blinked. "I've always wanted to see this company perform," she said, slightly touched. "How did you know?"

"Lucky guess," said Kurt. "And about those pompoms, forget sorting through them, they're all frayed. They look like you haven't gotten new ones in forever."

"Yeah, well," said Quinn. "Schuster never did give us that big a budget."

"I was on the Cheerios too, you know," said Kurt. "To think that your poor kids have to practice their routines with these things…." he picked up one of the pompoms and ran his fingers through it. "I just can't take it. We're going to buy some new ones right now."

"I don't have enough money for all of them," said Quinn.

"I do," said Kurt. He took her by the wrist and practically yanked her out of the closet and down the hallway.


"Okay…" said Tina, glancing out the window of her classroom. "Now I know I'm losing my mind."

"Does she even realize he's…gay?" said Artie.

"And married?" said Tina.

Artie shook his head and backed up from the window. "Come here," he said. Confused, Tina walked over, then screamed a little when Artie pulled her into his lap. "You're gonna be a great mom no matter where our kid comes from, you know that?"

Tina laughed. "Aww, where'd that come from?"

Artie shrugged. "I just really love you right now for some reason."