First Month Without You .

It was hard to believe that I was still alive. It felt like I had died, like a part of my soul had left with yours. I know that everyone was worried for my health. I was sickly, pale and clammy. I knew that my eyes, once shining with joy and pure lust for life, were now empty and dead and downcast. I knew that my smiles were now depressing and just hollow imitations of my old ones, and I knew that I was bringing everyone down with me.

But everything just seemed so meaningless. Nothing I did –not that I did much, I assure you- made me feel better about you leaving me. There was no point in doing anything because I knew that, at the end of the day, you were still going to be gone, that I was still alone… What's the point of doing something, anything, when you weren't there, motivating me and brightening my day just by being there?

Everyone kept trying to convince me to move, to get up, to get motivated. I could see that even the Young Master was worried. But I had lost all will to live, all because you would never live with me again. Because you would never smile at me again, or make suggestive comments towards me, or kiss me softly and sweetly… Because you would never live again.

I know you had not meant to leave me now. At first, after the initial shock and pain had registered, I felt anger- at you, for leaving me, at myself, for letting you leave, and at fate, for taking you away. Now, all I feel is an empty, numbing void.

Because, who am I without you beside me?

XX

Oh, God, guys. I can't express how sorry I am that I've been delaying this and putting it off. Just so you know – I'm not dead. Not yet.
I am SO sorry for not updating this. So, during science, I just started doodling with words and came up with this… I am sorry for the lack of happiness… But this was all I could come up with… Still, it's better than nothing, right?
Probably not D:
R&R