Back in the present, the water was getting alarmingly high. He would probably be panicking more if he wasn't so lethargic due to the blood loss and the freezing cold water that saps the feeling from his limbs. He has become so incapacitated, that the only task left for him is to focus on trying to stay awake. The doctor within him knew he had to stay awake. Giving into the blissful nothingness of oblivion could mean embarking on a slumber he may never wake from.

However, being conscious also guaranteed that there was nothing to spare him from experiencing the true depths of misery that his current condition entailed. Bone's now finds that his natural tendency to lean towards the negative turning against him. A fact that if he had the wherewithal at present, Leonard would likely find darkly ironic. For this very same characteristic habit of his was one he had often taken a strange sort of pride of and often considered a blessing because it ensured he was seldom disappointed. Now his own negativity bolstered by reality, has morphed into a psychological monster of his own creation. His ever eternal, internal cynic crushing any foolish hopeful notion that tries to take residence in his mind with a rabid avid predatory glee. Thus, everyone of his desperate attempts to climb or even arrest his rapid descent into the dark depths of despair crumbles beneath his grasp; ensuring that he is left with nothing to fend off the coiling writhing tendrils of dark thoughts that desire to ensnare and suffocate him as they inexorably pull him into their ebony fathomless chasms.

His fear of death and despair of what he may lose weigh heavily on Leonard's mind. Thoughts on the growing likelihood that he might never get to see his friends again; that he may never get to mend things with that idiot kid and the Hobgoblin. The deep sadness that he may never get to see Jim's annoyingly beautiful smile or hear that walking computer say 'fascinating' with that vexing, velvet voice of his. From the immense tragedies, the fact that he may never get to see and hold his little girl again or be their for her as she grows up. To the minor tragedies such as never again getting to experience a lazy summer evening, reading under his favorite peach tree in Georgia. Sardonically he finds he is no longer sure if the drops that have been running down his face are rain or tears anymore. Even though he's never been the religious sort he finds himself contemplating how he'd give anything for a second chance.

His stubborn rebellious heart quickened and ached that those he loved may forget him or worse replace him. Bones tries his best to crush this notion and considers it an selfish desire to entertain. The right thing is to wish them to move on and not to be haunted by his absence. Nonetheless he finds the prospect of not being with them sorrowfully erresting. The notion too painful to purposely contemplate for long. His subconscious mind however seems to have it in for him and visions flash before his mind's eye unbidden. A series of mental images of him being absent from all the places and roles he has come to consider his own. Even worse are the ones his cruel imagination conjures of those spaces and tasks Bones once took ownership being filled by someone else, erasing him utterly until he is nothing but a shadow. What haunts him most is the ship he has come to call his home moving; on leaving his bones forever alone, on this forsaken alien planet. The desolating visage of such a forlorn notion, spurs his aching hopeful heart into action. Like his love is a starving desperate creature it claws scramble for purchase as it clings to life with a renewed ferocious fervor; howling and whining in mournful trepidation at face such

With considerable force of habit Leonard pushes his own needs and desires aside; choosing once again to focus on the needs of others. Ever diminishing his own value, Leonard with naively concludes that those close to him will be able to move on eventually. They'd be saddened by his death for a while, but eventually they'd get caught up in all the new adventures they would be having. He was sure that the crew would move on in no time. Starfleet would find some shiny, new genius doctor fresh out of the academy to replace him. Overtime they'd think less and less about their old grumpy doctor. Who knows they might even be secretly glad that he was gone, as they would no longer be bothered by his bad attitude and eccentricities.

They had lost many a crew and moved on. Leonard would know, as many of the said casualties were the ones he had failed to save. Each loss contributing to the weight of his failure; he remembered them all. Granted, he would never presume to force the burden of his sentimentality on the others. While the loss of any of the others in command would be devastating for the ship and it's crew. In fact Bones couldn't imagine the ship without any of them.

However he was not naive enough to assume the same of himself. Heck, what with the escalating conflict between the Federation and the Klingon Empire, maybe they'd be better off off without him holding them back. His Joanna would be sad but she'd be alright too. As much as Leonard loathed to admit she had a capable stepfather and a loving mother. Plus Bones imagined that it would be hard for someone to miss a father who was hardly ever around. As for the two closest friends…Jim and Spock had been growing closer everyday. Over time Leonard had come to feel more like a third wheel than a vital part of their dynamic. What had been smooth seeming effortless symbiotic cooperation had become stressed and strained. Things had become so dysfunctional that Bone's had come to question whether the relationship they had before was just his own foolish delusion.

Perhaps this underestimation of his value is prompted by his habit of taking the lion's share of blame for the blameless on himself or maybe his need to do no harm to others. Regardless of how erroneous the perception, it seems that Bones needs to assume that those dear to him will be fine without him. Leonard decides that those closest to him will have each other; that they will not be as lost without him, as he has been without them. Bones hoped that maybe once in awhile they'd remember him and raise a glass to his memory. The thought brought a sad smile to the doctor's lips.

A strong wind breaks McCoy from his introspective quagmire. Strange, muses Leonard as he notices the floating snowflakes around him, at some point the icy rain had changed into flurries of steadily falling snowflakes. Then he observed that he had already accumulated a fair amount of snow, on and around him while he had been lost in his thoughts. Bones wondered how long his attention must have wandered. If Jim was here he'd give him 'Bones is brooding too much again' look. Spock would be obnoxiously helpful of course, and would tell Leonard exactly how long he had been out of it by using that Vulcan brain of his. Leonard chuckled sadly at the recollection, until the laugh gave way to weak coughing. He witnesses his breath turning into mist and how the rainwater seems to be turning into ice astonishingly quickly.

The weather on this planet is really crazy. This had been a lush jungle when they first arrived and now it suddenly was turning into a arctic desert. Starfleet must have done a pretty poor job surveying the place for it's suitability for an outpost. Or the fleet just didn't care about what would be the reality for the unfortunate souls who would be stuck trying to survive on this rock. Bone's cynical side would put it's bet on it being the later. Damn it, if he had the energy he'd be having a hissy fit about Starfleet's questionable policies but currently he was just too tired to rage at Starfleet.

The rain seems to have stopped but in it's wake the light flurries seem to have taken up the quest to make Leonard miserable. The snow has swiftly turned into a growing blinding blizzard Strange, despite the cessation of the rain, the thunder and lighting has continued unabated. The lightning illuminates the snow every once in awhile with a bright flash of violet that was eerily beautiful star sky filtered through the obscuring mist caused by the relentlessly falling snow. Thunder snow? Spock is probably fascinated right now.

Normally Bone's mind would be too occupied with enumerating all the data associated with the potential risk factors and health hazards of this alien phenomena. Currently however, Leonard finds himself achieving a sort of inner peace, through which he finds himself able to appreciate the inner beauty of this vista surrounding him. Honestly he's starting feel sort of comfortably numb. The ache from his injuries, combined with the collective misery that was the all encompassing cold and creeping damp; now this once unbearable pain was receding in waves like the tide. In the the agony's wake Bones felt himself being flooded incrementally by a numbing warmth. The snow and ice didn't even feel cold any longer really. The soft snow around and now on top of him feels more like a warm blanket. The once biting cold air is more like a warm Georgia summer afternoon. Lord almighty, he is so tired. Keeping his eyes open is becoming increasingly harder. Every time he blinks, the desire to keep those heavy lids down is becoming more and more tempting. The doctor in him is setting off alarms, is frantically reciting medical text and research data. However the voice was getting softer by the minute and the rest of him couldn't find the energy to care. Perhaps his grandma was right after all, and maybe those weird nightmares had been a dire omen.

Moments later, Leonard thinks that he must be hallucinating because he swears he feels the warm weight of someone on top of him immobilizing him. Suddenly Bones he feels warm hands caressing his person. The ghostly caress succeeds with fiendish rapidity at soothing the tension from his muscles, despite his sluggish confusion and concern. The phantom appendages stroke his hair, press him gently down when he stirs and tries to struggle to right himself. He feels a gentle fingers closing his eyes, softly shutting the lids and holding them closed every time he manages to wrestle the strength to open them. Not only that, but he must be out of his mind because he can hear an unearthly voice singing and whispering in his ear. He shivers as he feels ice cold lips and breath on his skin. The whispers urge him to sleep, to let go of his burdens and surrender himself to there embrace. It sings haunting beautifully sad melodies, like a lullaby that Bones can't help but be entranced by. So tired, Leonard's mind pleads, just need to rest for a bit as he finds himself unbiddenly lulled . Sleep, croons the voice; the snow is warm . 'But I can't' protests Leonard, 'though I can't recollect why'. His internal voice sounding young and unsure even to himself. Let go, urges the voice, sleep.

Bones begins to succumb to phantom's will and his own weary bones pull to slumber was overtaking him. Suddenly there is a sonorous bark like thunder that reverberates like the ringing of church bells in wee hours of the morn, the spell shatters and Leonard is startled back to awareness. Then a growling like immense millstones grinding against each other or rusty iron hinges being played with by the billowing wind. Almost instantly the weight and presence that was holding the doctor down vanishes. Leonard finds that he can once again move a bit and opens his eyes with trepidation. When Bones turns to look in the direction of the sound, the sight that greets him makes him reconsider having opened them in the first place. A huge, black dog like creature the size of a horse was peering down with interest at him from the top of the other side of the chasm that fastly seems to be becoming his grave . Instinctively Leonard closes his eyes, becomes still and limp, as he tries his best to play possum. McCoy hears what could have been a snort, the shifting of rubble as something massive climbs down and then the sound massive paws in the snow. Bones feels hot breath on his on his face. Then he hears a voice echoing not in his ears but in his very mind itself, I know you're awake Leonard .

With a gasp the doctor opened his eyes abruptly his ruse now pointless. To his dawning horror he finds that the massive beast, thing or whatever, is now right next to him gazing down at him patiently. Or at least Bones thinks it's staring at him, it's hard to tell since it's eyes are just two brilliant lights in the darkness. "Get the hell away from me!" yells Leonard automatically his voice higher than normal due to the fear. As if to prove a point, the thing yawns revealing far too many long sharp teeth. Due to what he just witnessed Bones is paralyzed with terror but he glares up at the beast in defiance regardless. In a matter of moments the creatures the things muzzle is a scant few inches from his face. Leonard freezes, closes his eyes, resigns himself to his fate and waits helplessly. But in instead of the monster tearing him apart as he thought the thing would, it gently licks his face with it's massive tongue. It…it's wet and it tickles. As if it's typical earth canine the beast licks his face methodically as if it is attempting to clean the muck off his face. Finally McCoy can't take it anymore and he yells,"Cut it out, I say cut it out!" The effort leaves him breathless.

When he next looks at the beast it is regarding him solemnly, with what could be sympathy in its gaze " Mate, you're buggered all to hell ." said the monstrous dog, thing. When the creature speaks it's voice has a deep musical quality kind of like pipe organs that speak with an English accent. Seeing such a grim beast was bad enough, but now it's conversing with him? 'I've lost my marbles for sure now' Leonard thinks. Granted hallucination or not, it would be rude to ignore it. "I appreciate you pointing out the obvious for me but what in tarnation are you?" Bones rasps "And more important what do you want?"

The creature tilts its head in an odd facsimile of canine behavior " right now you need to save your strength. " After it speaks the creature proceeds to encourage the doctor to turn over with its massive paws and muzzle. The movement both aggravates Leonard's injuries and does little to quell his fear. Even with the monstrous hound's clear attempts to be as gentle as possible, it finds its human charge shaken and in pain. With deliberate slowness and seemingly telegraphed motions the enormous canine's as it comes to rest in a bow position by McCoy's side. Under normal conditions Bones would want to recoil away from the creature who is far too close to the Doctor for comfort. The beast smells like an odd but not unpleasant combination of lotus blossoms, smokey mir, freshly and freshly tilled earth with a hint of dog. However Leonard finds that its fur is soft and most importantly it radiates warmth like hearth . In his near frozen condition Bones can't reject any relief from the terrible biting cold no matter how ominous and strange the source may be. Despite himself Leonard finds that like a newborn kitten he is instinctively seeking to snuggle up to the warmth nearby and relying on this being for support.

"Keep a tight grip on my neck Leonard" growls the grim beast.

"Whah?" Yelps Bones in surprise but he nonetheless holds on for dear life to the beasts scruff as it rises with the Doctor haphazardly on it's back. With seemingly no effort it leaps out of the death trap that McCoy thought was to be his grave. On one hand he is grateful for his liberation but on the other hand most of him is distracted by the pain the movement was causing and aggravation of his injuries. To say the least, Bones lost touch with reality for a while as his world narrowed to desperately clinging on to this strange phantasmal otherworldly beast.

When Leonard returns to consciousness and as far as he can perceive he is alone. Truth be told it's hard for him to know for sure, since he is currently flat on his back spread eagle and unable to move a muscle. He stares up the starry sky and the multiple moons this accursed allein world had managed to collect, wondering what next? As if the universe is answering his query, Bones hears hurried footfalls of someone running full tilt through the snow towards him. Although his perception is fading in and out McCoy could swear that he hears someone yelling "Doctor!" Is someone in need of medical aid? Bones feels a fresh wave of guilt at the thought that this is yet another soul that he has failed. Then he feels hands on his person lifting him from the cold ground, their touch familiar and real not strange like those other hands before. Leonard blinks and finds that he is gazing up into surprisingly warm, compassionate brown eyes.

"Doctor!" Says Spock again and Bones thinks he must be imagining things when he notes the softness and emotion in the man's voice. The way Spock said his name sounded like a plea or a prayer. Bones wonders what could have happened to make the Science officer so upset. As much as he enjoyed hassling the Vulcan, in reality he truly cared deeply about the man. That and Mama always said it was rude not to answer, when spoken to. Nonetheless it seems that the choice is not up to the good doctor. It seems that everything has finally caught up with Leonard. He is rapidly fading, the darkness creep creeping. Distantly he is aware of being gathered into the embrace of arms inhumanly strong and lifted aloft. Following on the heels of this sensation, all awareness flees from the doctor's grasp in it's place was an endless devouring sea of shadows and nothingness.