Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Sons of Anarchy, they belong to the genius Kurt Sutter and FX! Only the OC's belong to me.
Alyssa sat in her living room after the game had ended until eleven o'clock. Juice never showed up. She wondered if it was something serious or if he just ended up drunk at the clubhouse and forgot about her. She didn't know if he was a big drinker or partier but she didn't put it past him. The lifestyle of a MC member included a large amount of alcohol. It wasn't something she could argue with. One or two days throughout the week she might have a couple beers at the end of a hard day. She even liked going out on the weekends with her friends. Alcohol was almost always a part of those outings and she could hold her own. She was twenty-four years old, these were supposed to be the best years of her life. She wanted to thoroughly enjoy them.
After she woke up and showered the next morning she wondered what to do on her day off. Jax told her when she wasn't with Juice she should hang out at the club. Alyssa wasn't sure if it would be okay for her to just show up at the club unannounced. Since it was a Monday Teller-Morrow would be open and there would be plenty of other people around. She didn't think it would look too odd if she went and hung out for the day.
Alyssa dressed herself in a pair of dark Se7en jeans and an aqua leopard print t-shirt with the words WILD CHILD written on it. She thought about wearing a pair of heels but decided against it and went with black flip-flops. She wanted a relaxed look and heels might set off the wrong impression. She grabbed her oversized purse and walked out the door.
When she pulled in the parking lot she saw Tara and Gemma walking out of the clubhouse. Alyssa parked her car and started to walk towards them when she noticed a skinny blonde already there. Gemma smiled at both of them and made the introductions while Tara had an unhappy look on her face.
"Lyla, this is Alyssa, she works with Tara. Alyssa, this is Lyla, she's Opie's old lady."
Alyssa shook hands with Lyla while the other three women finished their conversation. Lyla was wondering where her husband was because he hadn't gone home the night before. It seemed Juice wasn't the only one who didn't go where he said he would. Alyssa wondered what MC issue may have occurred that the men ended up crashing at the club.
Munson and Trager rode up on their Harleys when Tara was about to say her goodbyes and head to work. Before she could leave Gemma noticed Lyla walking in the clubhouse and made a mad dash towards her, while everyone followed. Whatever Gemma was trying to stop had already begun. Lyla was arguing with another female who made it pretty clear she slept with Opie the night before. The other girl, who Alyssa didn't recognize seeing at all the day before, pulled a gun on Lyla and everyone else in the club. The older Winston was holding Tara's youngest and turned around to protect the child. Alyssa stood next to Tara hoping the other girl would leave peacefully. Lyla walked away in hysterics as the gun wielding crazy woman walked out.
"Who the fuck was that?" Alyssa asked Tara as she went to get her child.
"Thanks, Piney," Tara said as he handed the baby over to her. "That was a stupid good-for-nothing whore. That bitch better not step foot in this club again or I swear I will kill her myself," Tara said as she was pacing the floor clutching her child. She was obviously shaken up, Alyssa thought. "I can't believe this shit. Now I'm late for work, again."
"Just tell them one of the boys were sick," Alyssa offered an excuse.
"I know, I've just been getting there late and leaving early a lot these past few weeks. I've gotta' get going. Are you gonna' be here all day?" Tara asked Alyssa.
"Yeah, I've got no where else to go. I figured I would just hang out till Juice got back. He left his laptop at my apartment so I thought maybe he'd come back and work on it some more tonight."
"Do you mind watching Thomas while I'm at work? Gemma was going to until I was done with my meeting and then I was going to bring him to Aleta—but it's probably better if I don't leave again today."
Alyssa smiled, excited she had a reason to stay and also because Thomas Teller was just too cute for words. "Of course. He'll keep me entertained. I was dreading having to sit here all day with nothing to do." Alyssa reached her arms out and took Thomas from his mother.
Before Tara could leave, Opie walked in bleeding from his eye. Alyssa wondered how much they depended on Tara for situations like these. She was probably getting calls all hours of the day and night when the members got beat up or shot. Tara's professional life was probably suffering, she said herself that she had been late a lot recently. Alyssa felt a pang of sadness for her. It was only a matter of time till it caught up with her. She hoped Tara wouldn't lose her job because the fact that she was always running off to help members of the club when they needed her. Alyssa forced herself to push the thoughts from her mind. She couldn't worry about what happened to Tara. As much as she would like to think they were becoming friends, they weren't. If Tara knew who Alyssa really was, she wouldn't think twice about turning her over to the club. Alyssa had to focus on the fact that she was just acting out a part. None of this was real for her.
It was after ten o'clock when Alyssa heard a knock at her door. She was in bed compiling her notes about the Sons. There wasn't much she had to work with right now. It was still early, but she wanted to be as detailed as possible, and she didn't want to forget anything that may be of importance later. She tried to add things, as best she could remember, about who was at the clubhouse and when they were there. Where they came from, when they arrived, when they left, and where they were going. Right now she really only had times of arrivals and departures. She knew her first night there that they were in Tucson and she hoped she would hear more about their destinations.
She put all her notes in her lock box, slid it under the bed, and then walked to the front door. The chain lock was already on so when she opened the door it only opened a crack. She looked out and Juice was standing on the other side with a sorrowful look on his face. She shut the door and slid the chain lock off. Before she re-opened it she looked down at herself. She was wearing a navy blue tank top and shorts pajama set from Victoria's Secret. It wasn't anything sexy or revealing, but she wished the shorts weren't so short right now. She didn't plan on wearing them in front of anyone but they kept her cool on hot nights.
She opened the door and waved her hand towards the living room, a sign of invitation. She noticed as Juice walked in he was limping. He was trying to put as least amount of pressure on his right leg as he could. Alyssa couldn't help her curiosity. "What happened to you?"
Juice lowered himself slowly into the green chair while Alyssa sat cross-legged on her couch facing him. "I got shot."
Alyssa's mouth dropped open and she was sure her eyes almost popped out of her skull. "Are you serious? Are you okay," she asked Juice, still quite shocked. She had never seen anyone get shot before and no one she worked with had gotten shot since she had been there.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Tara stitched me up. Just hurts when I walk."
"Ohmigod, what happened?"
"Long story. It's alright, I'm fine."
It was clear he did not want to discuss the details about his wound anymore. Alyssa wasn't going to push him. "Okay. Is there anything I can get you? Are you hungry, thirsty?"
"Actually, I'm just exhausted." He tried to lean back in the recliner, but he couldn't put enough pressure on his good leg to get it to go backwards. "Sorry I didn't show up last night. I just got into some things and couldn't get away. Did ya' end up staying here?"
"Yeah. I went to the clubhouse this morning and hung out there for the day."
"Yeah, Tara mentioned you were there. She—uh—mentioned you wanted to do some more work on the computer tonight, but I was thinking, I can do more tomorrow if that's okay with you. I'm pretty tired." He rubbed the top of his head, his fingers going through his mohawk.
"No, please don't even worry about that. It can definitely wait." Alyssa paused for a moment not sure what else to say. "Did you wanna' crash here tonight or back at the clubhouse?"
"Well I'm supposed to be wherever you are and I'm sure you'll be more comfortable here—so here's good with me if it is for you." He tried to lean back in the chair again.
"Okay. Why don't you—uh—take my room tonight. You're clearly in pain and sleeping anywhere other than a bed isn't going to be comfortable."
"No, I can't take your bed. Thank you, but really, I can't."
"Well you are. There isn't going to be a discussion. There's no way I will sleep knowing you're out here trying to sleep in a recliner or on a couch with a gunshot wound." Alyssa got up and went into the kitchen. She filled a glass of water and then went into the bathroom to get two aspirin. She set the pills and water onto her nightstand and picked up her discarded dirty clothes off of the floor. She stuffed three dirty shirts and two pairs of jeans into the closet in her room. She gave it one last look over and nodded her head in approval. When she went back to the living room Juice was still sitting in the chair. She put her hand on her hip and gave a stern look, "come on, let's go," her tone was firm.
Juice just stared at her for a minute, his eyes looking her up and down. She started to feel a little uncomfortable in her outfit and wondered if she should have changed into sweatpants while she was in her room. She didn't budge in her stance though; she figured he was waiting for her to do just that, which is why she couldn't. "Now," she said.
He let a chuckle escape his mouth and turned it into a wide smile. She wasn't sure if he was amused with her or what. He began to stand up and winced in obvious pain. Alyssa walked over to him, not sure if she should lend him an arm or not. She didn't know if he was the kind of guy that would scoff at accepting help from a woman while he was in pain. She couldn't stand the look of him struggling, so she held her arm out anyway. If he shook it off that would be fine, but she couldn't stop herself from offering, that's not how she was raised. Juice accepted her arm and held on the whole way to her bedroom. He took off his cut then sat on the edge of the bed.
"I hate to ask you this, but is there any way you can take my boots off?" Juice asked her, with his head down. Alyssa didn't say anything, but just kneeled in front of him removed his left shoe and then his right, a little gentler. "Thanks," he said as he scooted himself on the bed.
"There's two aspirin and a glass of water if you need them. I'm not sure if Tara gave you anything, but if you wake up in the middle of the night and need them, they're there." Alyssa walked to her doorway and shut of the light. "Goodnight Juice."
"Alyssa, you can stay in here if you want. I feel bad kicking you out of your own bed. I mean, I can't really move, so I won't move from my side if you wanna' sleep in here. That couch out there doesn't look too comfortable."
Alyssa turned around but could only make out the outline of his body. She contemplated his offer for a few seconds. "Okay," she simply said. She walked around to the other side of the bed and got in ever so lightly, to not disturb Juice. She pulled up the light sheet over her and closed her eyes.
She laid there for a few hours in silence. Every now and then she would toss and turn, and right now she was on her side facing Juice. She kept her eyes shut; she didn't dare open them to look at him. She wasn't sure if she couldn't sleep because Juice was in her bed next to her or because she liked the fact that he was in her bed next to her. Alyssa hoped it wasn't the latter. It had been a long time since she was this close to someone and she was sure it was just the thrill of it all getting to her.
"You awake?" Juice breathed out in a low whisper.
She froze. She wasn't sure if she should keep pretending to be sleeping or answer him. She figured with all the moving she had been doing he had to of known she wasn't sleeping. "Yeah." She opened her eyes for the first time and looked at him. She still didn't have any curtains yet and the moonlight shining through her window made shadows on his face.
"Having trouble sleeping too?" She nodded back in reply and then he continued. "Can I ask you something?"
"Mm—hmm." Alyssa cleared her throat and readjusted herself so she could see him better.
Juice kept his eyes at the ceiling, not once looking at her. "Have you ever done something so bad that you just know there's nothing you can do to make it better?"
Alyssa wondered what was plaguing him. She could tell there was something off about him when he came in. It was more than just being shot, he wasn't that same person she had met the other day. Something was really bothering him. "Um, I dunno'. I guess I feel that there's always a way to be redeemed. No matter how bad you may think it is it's probably fixable. There's always ways to right your wrongs."
"God, I wish that were true."
He sounded defeated, like he truly believed that whatever it was couldn't be fixed. "Juice, what's wrong?" Alyssa was concerned and curious at the same time.
A deafening silence filled the room for a long time. She didn't dare speak again. She knew if he was going to tell her it had to be on his terms, she couldn't force it. He let out a quiet sigh and then spoke slowly. "The guy—who shot me—I uh—had to shoot him back. If I didn't—he was gonna' kill me." Alyssa didn't say anything, unsure if Juice had anymore to say. "Its just—the worst part is that—he was a Son. Even though I know I had to do it to save my own life, I just can't get it out of my head that I killed a brother."
Alyssa was glad that her back was to the window so the moon could not illuminate her face. She was completely stunned after what she just heard and she was positive her face showed it. She took a moment to gather her thoughts before speaking. Killing a member of your own MC was a huge deal. Alyssa didn't' know the details and because Juice was still alive, she figured that the other person was dirty. The club probably disposed of him discreetly and no one would ever know. She wondered who it was and if it would affect the investigation the ATF had going. "When someone's put in a position like you were, when its either you or someone else, everyone is gonna' make sure its not them. Ya' know? Nobody wants to die Juice and if that means killing to protect yourself, well, you gotta' do what you gotta' do." Alyssa was taught to never hesitate in her training. Even a split second could cost an agent their life.
"Yeah, I know. Its just you don't picture your family as the enemy though. I guess that's what's getting to me."
Alyssa didn't say anything but slid her hand over to Juice's and held it. She didn't want him feeling bad for what he had to do. It was obviously self-defense and he did the right thing. If he hadn't of, he wouldn't be here with her right now. She wasn't sure how else to convey that, so when he looked at her she leaned in and kissed him. It was a brief kiss, short, but still with meaning. She wanted him to know it was okay and not to feel guilty for being the one who was alive.
He looked at her; their faces still inches apart. She gave him a soft smile and waited to see if he would kiss her again. He did, and this time his hand cupped her cheek. She gave him access to her mouth and his tongue caressed hers gently. It wasn't a wild kiss, more sensual than anything. It wasn't filled with passion, but it still made the hair on her arms rise and the butterflies in her stomach go wild. She liked the feeling. She hadn't felt that way from just kissing someone in a long time. It made her feel like a schoolgirl playing seven minutes in heaven and getting her first kiss. She put her hand on his chest and then slid it to his upper arm, feeling the coarse muscles along the way. Her mind was racing with how much she wanted him in that moment but then she thought about the box beneath her bed and broke the kiss. She gave him a sweet smile and pecked the corner of his mouth, "goodnight Juice."
AUTHOR'S NOTE:
Just wanted to send out a thank you to all of you who have reviewed thus far! I really appreciate it! I love getting reviews and hearing what you all think... any of you who haven't reviewed yet, please do, they make me want to write more for you!
I've also read stories before where the author had posted pics of what the characters are wearing and that kind of thing and I've loved it. I thought it was such a nice addition and helped visualize it better, so I decided to do that myself. I created an account on photobucket and added some of Alyssa's outfits and I will plan to add more as I go.
The account is: www . photobucket .com /glugentige
It is password protected and the password is: undercover
Don't forget to review! Thanks :)
-Jade
