Anna is sexy because she finally finished the first half and was so excited she decided to make two three thousand word chappies! Maybe three!
Psh, what, after a month? I'M JUST KIDDING, WE LOVE YOU AND ARE GLAD THAT YOU FINALLY *cough* FINALLY FINISHED THE CHAPTER~
:3 And only because Roxy asked...ROXY IS AWESOME ENOUGH TO MAKE ME UPDATE! But she stole my Shakespearean book, so I'm mad at her. D:
OH. Yeah. She told me :D She said it made you smile angrily at her... which makes no sense. Care to elaborate, Anna? :333 Please, tell me the secret on how to smile angrily.
As you know, I'm always smiling. Even when I'm mad. (Less when I'm depressed, but I still do.) And so when I'm mad, my lips quirk up. Cuz Imma freak. :3
Ah. It must be the freak part that does it xDDD
AT LEAST I HAVE AWESOMENESS TO BALANCE IT OUT. D:
*Stares at Anna blankly, stunned by her gorgeousness, humor, and awesomeness.* (ANNA~ I HOPE YOU DIE FOR THAT! Ps, readers, I didn't actually say that T_T) Anna... awe-awesomeness? :oooo *Giggles.* Should we let them read the (month long) chapter yet?
Suuure. ^^ AND BY THE WAY, I'M THE ONE POSTING THIS, PEOPLE, BECAUSE HALEY IS ALL SCHOOLY, AND ACTING TOTALLY AWESOME, AS USUAL. XD
*shrugs* PROCRASTINATORS FOR THE WORLD~ Like how I'm learning the element song.. in less than a week... for extra credit... but WHATEVER :D
S'not like I'm editing what Haley's sayyyinng...
:OOOO YOU WOULDN'T DARE D: I HAVE THE PASSWORD FOR THE ACCOUNT TOO~ I CAN CHANGE IT! D: T_T
OOPS. BEGINNING A/N TIME IS UP. :DDDD BYEEE. ENJOY.
EDLOFADSFLBDSHOFVIFSHLNEGOPA REHTAPT" P$TBGPIADGFHEWAFZas
Hate, Prank, Love
Chapter Four
"What?" Max screeched indignantly. "That's illegal! Isn't it? I mean…gah! That should count as child abuse!" She waved her hands around in a not-so-attractive-and-extremely-nutty-looking-way. "Handcuffing me to him? That's pure evil! Demons must've replaced you in your sleep!"
Fang looked at them with as much indifference as possible due to his emo-ness. "She was impossible to deal with when we were at different schools! I'd go insane handcuffed to her for a week!" Fang's little sister perked up, smiling wide.
"Two weeks, actually, Fang," she chirped like the little devil she was. Waving two fingers at him, she winked, "Two looong, looooong weeks."
Glaring at her, Fang turned to his parents, gesturing to the shedevil. "What is she even doing here? She's supposed to be at her friend's house, isn't she? Doing her homework or something?" His father raised an eyebrow at his son, leaning backwards with a smirk that matched Fang's. Wow, Max thought. They really look alike.
"So are you," he replied casually. "But you got suspended, so Dawn asked to help with the punishment. You can thank her for the handcuffs." Will gestured to his daughter, and she smiled sweetly at the two, wiggling her fingers. Fang shot her a death glare and Max huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. If Dawn wasn't Angel's old friend… she thought angrily.
The seventeen year old skipped up to them, smiling sweetly as she waved around the cuffs. "Okay, so, the rules; no using these handcuffs for sexual purposes," she pursed her lips, winking, "You can only be uncuffed at times such as restroom needs – meaning showering and dumping your waste – or changing purposes. If you have any dates, sorry, hope you have no issues with a third wheel. Oh, and lastly…"
She clamped the iron cuffs around their wrists, giggling, "Just have fun, kiddoes!"
"I hate you," they both said in unison, glaring intense fiery flames of anger at the girl.
"I know!" she chirped. "That makes it funner!"
~:-:~
Normally, the Martinez dining room was, for the most part, pretty mellow. The golden walls and black tile made it look very nice, and the family was mostly quiet at dinner. (After all, Ari and Max lived there, the monstrous eaters. Who would bother them with chit-chat and risk death?)
The dinner had been re-started after the little…announcement…and Ari and Ella had gotten home, as well. The minute they saw the handcuffs, though, they were out. Smart move, Max had thought, watching , depressed. Take me wiiithhhh you….
Max glared at Fang, moving his hand away from her leg. "Pervert," she growled, "You are so loving all this. I bet you're waiting until nightfall, when you can feel me up, aren't you?" The boy shot her a glare back, snarling slightly.
"Yeah, because I want you so badly," he muttered back sarcastically. "You have as much sexual appeal as a panda. No, wait, sorry. You have less sexual appeal than a panda." Dawn smirked to herself as she ate her pasta quietly across the table from them, listening discreetly.
Snorting, Max rolled her eyes, smirking at him. "Oh, you're just depressed that you secretly want me, Fangles," she said off-handedly. "And you should be, because I think you're less appealing to the eye than a wart."
Amusement lit the boy's eyes. "That's your reply?" he chuckled. "Must say, Maxie, you're lacking in the retorts tonight." Her eyes flashed and she stood up to excuse herself, but the handcuff yanked her to the side, towards Fang, and she wobbled before falling sideways, crashing halfway onto the dinner table and ending up with her face in Fang's food. "Max," he groaned. "What do you have against my pasta?"
She punched him in the gut, wiping sauce out of her eyes and glaring at him. "Fang," she mimicked, "What do you have against hygiene? Your breath freakin' stinks."
"Max!" her mother gasped, ignoring the insults and standing up. "You have to get cleaned up right away! Come on, I'll unlock you guys for a few moments, but you two," she pointed at the two fathers of the table, "Better keep an eye on that boy."
The men nodded as Dawn huffed, twisting the key in the lock and stepping back, letting them go. As everyone hurried out, the seventeen year old smiled to herself, sighing and murmuring, "Those idiots are so in love."
Giggling, she sat back down and finished her meal.
~:-:~
Max was yanked into her bedroom by a small tan hand with silver-painted nails as she went to go back down to dinner after getting cleaned up. Just as her eyes adjusted to the dim lighting, she felt a cold metal press against her wrist and groaned. "Not again," she muttered. "Can't you just, I don't know, shoot me, Dawn?"
The lights were flicked on, and she saw the two siblings standing in front of her, Fang scowling with his wrist connected to hers, and Dawn's cheerful and evil, her hands clasped in front of her. "I offered to shoot my brother," she explained with a shrug, "But the 'rents said we'd better not."
Max's lips twitched. "Aw, why not?" she snickered, glancing at Fang. "I bet coffin would look good on him. But…do they make a coffin big enough for that?" She gestured to him and he smirked back, eyes narrowed.
"My muscle?" he murmured, "No, sadly not. But I'm sure you'd like to feel for yourself, just to understand the size a little better." She stepped forward, scoffing and glaring at him.
"No, your fat," she snapped. "I don't see any muscle on you, Panda boy."
Fang smirked, leaning closer and dropping his voice to a whisper, "So you were checking me out, huh, Maxie? I knew you had a thing for me. Now who's enjoying our little situation?"
Max sneered, glaring up at him, their chests touching now. "Still you," she snapped, "And, for your information, I wasn't checking you out. I was trying to decipher what species you are."
His smirked deepened and he grabbed her open wrist, tugging her closer and whispering so that his breath fanned over her lips, "And what did you come up with, Max Dear?"
She struggled in his grip, fighting a blush as she glared more intensely. "A pig," she ground out, trying to pull away, "Crossed with an ape," she yanked her hand away, smirking in satisfaction, "And a penguin. It explains your eating habits and sexist beliefs, stupidity, and blubber."
Fang's arm wound around her waist and he tugged her close once again, missing her warmth as he cocked an eyebrow at her. "You know you think I'm sexy," he murmured. Max huffed, pushing at his chest with her free hand.
"I know I don't," she snapped again. Growling in annoyance, she punched his chest repeatedly. "This is sexual harassment! Let me go, or I'll scream rape!"
They heard an amused cough from behind them, and saw Dawn still standing there, giggling and rocking on her heels. "No need to scream, I'm right here," she replied before turning to her brother. "And remember the rules? No using the cuffs for sexual purposes!"
Fang smirked, glaring at his little sister and whispering, "You can't stop what happens at night, Dawnie."
A look of disgust crossed the girl's face, and Max growled angrily, pushing his arm away at last. "Yeah, well, I can!" she ground out, glaring up at him. "And if you touch me again, you will regret it, Raven."
He smirked, looking down at her and replying, "I'm looking forward to it, Hawk."
Dawn giggled, shaking her head at them so that her jet-black hair fell away from her shoulders. "You two are clueless," she sighed, skipping out. "Oh, well. Come downstairs to help clean up when you're done with your little lovers' spat."
They both glared at the door, screaming in unison, "WE'RE NOT LOVERS!"
"Sure you aren't!" the girl called back, grinning and laughing. "Sure you aren't."
~:-:~
"Move your freakin' butt, Fang! I swear, you take up more space than Texas!" Max growled, shoving him away, but only succeeding in falling towards him so that he had to catch her. Pulling away, she groaned. "This is impossible! How am I ever going to do anything with you here?"
Fang looked down at her, amused. "Max," he chuckled. "It's just dishes." He picked one up in example, placing it smoothly into the dishwasher without trouble. "A baby could do better than you're doing at this."
Huffing, the eighteen-year-old put her hand on her hip. "Oh, shut up, yellow spotted snake with a doubled tongue!" she snapped, and he looked at her with a laughing but questioning look. Sighing, she looked to the side, blushing. "It's a Shakespearean insult."
He couldn't help it.
He burst out laughing.
Max looked at him, hurt and anger flashing in her eyes, embarrassment twinkling behind it. "Shut up!" she ordered him sharply, kicking him. "It's not a big deal! So what if I read Shakespeare? I'll be ahead of you in college!"
Fang smirked at her, stepping forward and whispering, "Now, by the world, it is a lusty wench! I love her ten times more than ere I did: O! how I long to have some chat with her!" Blinking, she looked up at his face, into his midnight eyes, which were suddenly close.
"Taming of the Shrew," he said offhandedly, pulling away. "Petruchio, lines one sixty through…one sixty one, I believe." His usually emotionless eyes – well, to anyone other than Max – twinkled with mischief. "You're not the only secret brain, Max. We all have secrets."
Max blinked again, before murmuring, "I guess so, huh?"
He smiled a booming grin for a second, winking. "Yeah," he chuckled, before turning to the dishes and pushing up his sleeves, yanking Max's hand with him. "Now let's do these dishes."
Max glanced at him out of the corner of her eye, smiling softly. Fang knows Shakespeare? Why, I never thought I'd live to see the day he could quote Petruchio. I wonder how he is with Romeo…
~:-:~
Max's phone rang and she grabbed it before Dawn, her watchguard for the moment, could. Fang had gone to take a shower and so they had been uncuffed for the time being. "Calm yourself," she hissed. "It's only Nudge."
Pressing the phone to her ear, Max sigh-groaned, "Nudge, save me? O, my mother hath gone stark-raving mad!" she moaned dramatically, before sitting up straight and adding in her normal voice, "Mom's gone nutso and decided to handcuff me to Fang."
She heard Nudge's restrained giggles on the other end of the line, "I know. Dawn called and explained the whole thing. We're so…" the giggles erupted, and then were held back again, "sorry for you, honey." Max huffed as Dawn ripped the phone away, turning it on speaker.
"Of course we are!" J.J called over the line, "After all, what sane, hormonal teenage girl wants to be handcuffed to a hot emo dude? It's simply awful! Torture, really!"
"Not emo!" said boy called as he walked into the room shirtless, dripping wet. Max's eyes glanced him up and down for a long moment, widening slightly. He caught her and winked, running a hand through his hair. "Like what you see, Maxie?"
Max blushed, looking away. "No," she muttered. "I was simply wondering how one person can be so fat."
"Now, Maxie," Angel called over the phone, as well. "That was pretty rude of you, considering he's one of us now! Hawks are a family, after all." Max's eyes wandered to Fang's six pack for a moment. Yeah, family that has the urge to make out with other family members 24/7…
Fang chuckled, rolling his eyes, and Max's own eyes narrowed, replying sharply, "He's not even our species. He's a pig-ape-penguin-Raven-Hawk-wannabe." She winced at the horribleness of the insult. What's wrong with me today?
Fang is. You're not used to him being around all the time. You're attracted to him.
NO I'M NOT. SHUT UP INNER VOICES.
The boy in question smirked at Max, and she realized she was staring. Looking away with a blush, she chewed on her lip. You look like an effin' ditz, Max. Good job, really, she thought sarcastically.
"Eh!" Nudge called into the phone. "Ya'll done despoiling each other with your eyes?" This time, Fang looked away as well, a slight pink tint to his olive-toned cheeks as he grabbed his shirt and went back into the bathroom.
Dawn giggled, murmuring in response, "Ah, young love…"
Max hit her on the arm and took the phone away, growling, "Subject change, now!"
~:-:~
Staring daggers and flames at the bed, Max tightened her ponytail, yanking up Fang's hand, making him hit her in the side of the face and both of them hiss in annoyance. "I can't believe our parents are making us share a bed," she grumbled, studying it. "It's like one of those schools where you learn to be a mommy and a wifey."
Fang shot her an amused look. "You did not just say wifey," he muttered, and she shot him a glare. He put his free hand up in surrender, and they both turned and stared at the bed again. "This has to be a joke, though. What parents would allow this?"
Max shot him a look, tugging at the bottom of her tank top, which kept riding up and revealing a sliver of her toned, tan stomach. "Ours," she grumbled. Fang sighed, nodding and moving to climb onto the bed, sending Max tumbling after him, onto his back. Her head landed next to his as she laid, sprawled out on his back, chocolate brown eyes wide in shock as she let out an 'oof' in his ear.
"I knew you wanted me," he grunted, struggling to breathe. "And I knew you were fat, but not this fat. Wow, Max, what do you eat…rocks?"
Max rolled off of him, but the cuffs wouldn't let her get as far away as she'd like. "Why?" she snapped. "Is your head missing some?" Fang shot her a sexy smirk – no, Max, a regular smirk – and winked, rolling onto his side.
"Using oldies like that, Max?" he whistled. "I thought you were more original." She opened her mouth to shoot back a nasty retort, but he held up his free hand. "Eh, I'm too tired for this. Just lie down and get some rest, okay?"
She closed her mouth and hesitated before nodding, crawling under the covers while he stayed on top. They laid there for a while, before his arms wrapped around her and he nuzzled his face into her neck and murmured, "And the school you were thinking of is Growing to Success Academy in Arizona."
The girl shot him a weird look. "How did you know that?" she asked. "Did your mom try to ship you off or something?"
Fang shook his head, lips twitching as his eyes drooped down. "Nah," he mumbled. "I tried to send you there before."
And then he fell asleep with her glaring at him, a smug smirk on his face.
~:-:~
(MAX POV)
Fang and I were in a bedroom not much unlike mine, except instead of black and purple walls they were a cool cream color, and the floor was not purple shag carpet but Maplewood flooring. The bed was the same size as mine, but the comforter was a bright red.
For some reason, I felt angry. Angry at Fang for…something odd. My heart beat fast and angry as I glared across the room at him, striding forwards. I couldn't control my movements, my words. It was like I was watching myself from somewhere outside my body, and it was freakin' aggravating.
I pulled back my fist angrily. "Did you marry me to fast me? To make a jest of me? To make me a puppet? The laughingstock of Padua?" my voice boomed through the small room, but Fang caught my fist, pulling me close and pressing his nose to mine.
"Calm thyself, wench," he said, eyes flashing in annoyance. I did as told, staring into his deep, midnight eyes. "I married you because I love you." Smiling up at him, I ran a hand through his dark hair. He captured my hand in his, smiling. "Remember that, my Max."
Nodding obediently, I took his other hand. "Of course, my lord," I hummed, kissing his fingers, "Whatever you wish." Fang's lips quirked up in a smile, and he leaned in, pressing our foreheads together.
"Now, wench," he smirked, eyes hiding his amusement and care. "May I have a kiss?" I chewed my lip, shaking my head, my own eyes glittering mischievously. "Now, I thought you said whatever I wish. I wish for you to kiss me."
I shook my head again, our noses brushing. "I will grant you any wish but that, my lord," I murmured. "We are in my father's home, and what kisses should be stolen there?"
Fang's eyebrows shot up. "Are you embarrassed by me, wench?" he questioned, and I pulled away slightly, eyes wide in surprise.
"Oh, no, my lord!" my gasp made his lips twitch, "Never! I am just embarrassed to kiss." He took a step forward, wrapping his arms around my waist. A small gasp escaped my lips as he pulled me in close, pressing our foreheads together once more.
No, no, no, I thought, watching in horror as I looked down at Fang's lips for a long moment before looking back up into his eyes. He chuckled, leaning in. "My wench," he murmured, lips centimeters from my own. "You should learn to just obey."
Our lips brushed and then –
~:-:~
(Third Person Again)
Max shot up in bed, her heart beating erratically and her eyes wide. "What the heck was that?" she muttered to herself, rubbing her head with her free hand. "God, I've been reading too much Shakespeare…"
Glancing down at Fang, asleep next to her, Max sighed, lying down and staring at the ceiling.
This is going to be a long two weeks.
Go Taming of the Shrew~!
Mew :333
*Evil giggle.* MAXIE IS DREAMING OF A LOVE WITH FANGGGG~ :3 Whoop, whoop. HALLLLEYYYY. SHOULD WE SAY THAT THING?
... What thing? D: I DO NOT KNOW OF THIS THING YOU SPEAK OF~~~
You know..that R and R thing...
... R... and... R... thing? D:
You know, to get them to review?
... Umm... definitely :3 *Whispers* What the heck are you talking about? :33
Review About Remus! Kidding. :3 Rate and review, kiddies!
... I is officially confused ._. Rate?
READ, I mean. Sorry. I'm messing up my Youtube and my Fanfic. xD
... Isn't that what all these kind, gracious, amazing, awesome, superly fantastic people are doing? :o
Why, yes. It makes no sense, R and R. It should be R and S. Review and Subscribe. Hmmm.
R AND S UNLESS WE'RE FINISHED WITH THE STORY THEN YOU SHOULD JUST FAVORITE IT BECAUSE THERE'S NOTHING TO SUBSCRIBE TO.
:D ROASST :DDD (Read Our Awesome Stuff - SUBSCRIBE~ THANKS!) :333
YES. ROASST. NOW WE END THIS A/N WITH LOVE AND CARE AND HOPE FOR REVIEWS.
I am now officially ending this A/N with love and care, and hopes of reviews :3 BYEEE~
~Anna the Awesome
~Haley the Brilliantly Awesome :D
