mgowriter's note: Reference in Mockingjay: Chapter 11, page 162-164


Chapter 4: Dead By Morning

"Katniss, just this one line and you're done today. Thirteen's alive and well and so am I…"

. . .

Haymitch sees the collapse before it happens; the way her hands shake as she tries to find a place for them, the way her eyes waver as she swallows and forces herself to look at the camera. When she tries to speak, the only sound that comes out is a coarse sob.

It seems as if everyone in the group reaches for Katniss at the same time, because they know how fragile their Mockinjay has become. One fall, and she'll shatter into a million pieces. Cressida reaches her first, followed by Finnick and Gale, but she shakes her head and twists out of their comforting words, eventually finding herself clinging on to Haymitch as if he was her last tether to reality.

"It's okay," Haymitch says as he places a protective arm around her. "It's going to be okay." But it's no use. And it's not going to be okay. He can hear the hollowness in his own voice. It will never be okay.

Katniss' body shakes violently under her sobs, making her words barely coherent. "It's my…fault!" she stutters, gasping for air. The panic overtakes her and he can only hold her closer. Her breaths are uncontrollable, too fast, and quickly slipping into hyperventilation.

Haymitch sees Boggs from the corner of his eye, just outside of Katniss' view. He holds up a syringe filled half-way with a clear solution. The intention is clear. In her state, Katniss is an obvious danger to herself. Haymitch frowns at the needle, but after a second's hesitation, he nods his consent, and it slides into Katniss' arm. She becomes limp almost immediately.

Haymitch finally lets himself breathe. He looks down at Katniss, whose features are still twisted into a restless frown, and sighs deeply. The Mockingjay is broken.

. . .

They descend the endless stairs into the depths of District 13's bunker. The empty echoes of his shoes against the metal steps repeat themselves over and over again, floor after floor, until the beat feels as if it also vibrates inside him. His arms burn from the weight of Katniss' body, but he clings on tightly, holding her to his chest. Gale follows behind, sagging under the weight of Finnick, who erupted in hysterics shortly after Katniss' collapse.

They reach the makeshift hospital at the bottom of the vast bunker and he places her gently onto one of the beds. She looks even more fragile lying on the white sheet, in an artificial state of sleep. When her mother appears to take charge of the two new patients, Plutarch pulls him aside from the others.

"Coin just heard about the situation. She's calling an emergency meeting."

Haymitch shakes his head. He fights to control his anger. "She knew it was a risk sending Katniss out so soon after the bombing, but she did it anyway. You can tell Coin I'm done following her orders, and I'm sure as hell not attending any more of her meetings."

"They're saying it's to plan a rescue mission to the Capitol."

Haymitch looks at Plutarch. An image of Effie flashes in his mind. She's sitting at his kitchen table with a cup of coffee in her hands, looking up at him with unmistakable desire in her blue eyes. The night of their first kiss. Of all of his sleepless nights worrying about her, it's the image that comes to him the most. He can't bear to think about what they're doing to her at the Capitol while he's safe, here, in the depths of 13's bunker. A rescue mission could mean…

"Come on," Haymitch motions toward Plutarch as his mind runs into overdrive at the idea of having Effie back. The two men make their way quickly to the command room.

. . .

"Good of you to join us," Coin says in a way that negates the politeness of her words. Haymitch and Plutarch are the last ones in Special Defense and it's apparent everyone has been waiting.

"What's your plan?" Haymitch asks, forgoing the pleasantries.

"We pose as Peacekeepers, get into level five of the prison, and extract Peeta and the others," answers Boggs. "A simple in an out. The intel is good, and who knows when they're going to move them next. We go in now, while we still have the advantage."

"How are you going to get in?"

"Our operative inside the prison."

"The second in command?"

"He's the only one that has access," Boggs replies.

Haymitch considers his words. "You burn that bridge and it's down forever. We have one chance of getting into the prison."

"I think it's worth it. If we can get Peeta out, then it's a success."

Haymitch feels his stomach sink. "What about the others?"

Boggs shakes his head. "We'll try to get as many of them as we can, but Peeta's the priority. Without him, Katniss…" He doesn't have to finish the sentence. Everyone knows. Without Peeta, Katniss is useless, and the Mockingjay is dead.

"I'm going with you," Haymitch says.

"That won't be necessary." Coin's voice is matter of fact. "We need you here to help monitor the mission."

"Bullshit," Haymitch says angrily, turning toward her. "You don't need me here. I'm going with the rescue team."

Coin raises her eyebrows at his outburst. "For what? The escort? Your Capitol girlfriend who may very well be a spy for them. You're willing to risk the life of every person in this room and this District for her?"

All eyes in the room turn on Haymitch. He grits his teeth, unwilling to back down. He feels a hand on his shoulder. Boggs.

"We'll look for her, Haymitch," he says with sympathy. "You have my word. We're going to do our best to get everyone back."

Haymitch rips his arm away from the man. Everyone that Coin has a use for, the words hang on his tongue. He gathers himself, stares into the cold, steel eyes of Coin. For a moment, before she turns away, they are identical to those of President Snow.