Trust Me
February: Just a Memory

This love will always stay true.


The beeping sound of my mobile phone alerted my senses, and I quickly pick it up from its spot on the desk next to my bed.

A sigh left my lips when I see her name before lowering my phone and staring back at the ceiling.

Fifty messages and still counting...

It's been... almost two weeks, maybe. I'm not sure anymore.

Her words remained fresh in my head, echoed with every second passed, and it annoyed the hell out of me.

I just couldn't understand her.

She made me feel everything all at once, and they are all conflicting emotions. I feel so damn angry at her for saying such things, at the same time, I can't bring myself to hate her for doing so.

My thoughts were interrupted when a ringing sound came from my hand held device, and I grunt before checking the caller and answering it.

"What is it this time?"

"Hello to you too."

"Kiba, you're not Zack Fair."

"But Zack is growing on me! I swear!"

"...Cut the bullshit and tell me what you want."

"Woke up at the wrong side of the bed huh?"

"No."

"Girl problems? Oh, wait. Sorry, I forgot who I'm talking to."

"...Nailed it."

"I see, so it's- wait, WHAT THE FUCK? YOU HAVE GIRL PROBLEMS?"

A pause, and I could feel a sweat drop from the side of my head.

"...Fangirls. Right."

"No you asshole." I hiss. "The one time you get it right, you immediately take it back."

"Sasuke, this is you we're talking about. You expect me to think that-"

"Kiba, I'm fucking in love her." Of course, he doesn't know her name yet.

There was a long moment of silence, and I quickly lower my phone to my side, just in time as my asshole of a best friend suddenly yell a "what".

I think I just saved my left ear from going deaf.

An hour later, I finally convince Kiba to end the conversation because it was not helping me, and I didn't really need his "suggestions," especially Suigetsu's -who just butted in out of nowhere- advice.

Sighing heavily, I turn to look at the time on the clock and curse silently.

Looks like that phone conversation was longer than I had thought.

When I finally get out of bed in order to take a shower, the telephone rings and I almost yell in frustration before running downstairs to answer it.

"Hello?"

"Sasuke?"

I hold my breath for a moment before speaking.

"Kasumi-san."

Something must have happened if her mother called me.


This is definitely the worst day of my life.

First, I woke up earlier than usual and couldn't get back to sleep the moment Sakura entered my head. Next, over fifty messages from her, followed by Kiba's call and "small talk" with a side of advice from Suigetsu, and then Kasumi-san called and asked me to escort her daughter tonight.

"What did I do in my past life to deserve this?" I grumble in annoyance after pulling off my helmet and setting it atop my bike's seat.

Really. I must have probably betrayed a country, or maybe I broke someone's heart far worse than I did to Takehiko, or maybe I almost killed my best friend, or perhaps went on a wide-scale killing spree, or got a couple of nations angry and had them hunting down my head. Maybe I did something to my brother? Or maybe I-

...Where did those come from?

Betrayal wasn't something I took lightly, so why would I be a traitor in the past life?

...If I had one, that is.

Shrugging, I walk over to the front door and ring the doorbell. Footsteps could be heard from the other side, and soon, it opened to reveal Ikichi-san dressed in formal attire – complete with the tie and jacket.

"Sorry to call you over at the last minute."

"It's fine." I nod once, stepping in when he opened the door wider. "It's not like you request my presence everyday, right?"

"That's true." He chuckles, before patting my shoulder. "Now then, I was supposed to lend you some of my clothes in case you didn't have something formal, but... well," he looks at me and smiles. "I guess I don't have to worry about that."

"My mother wouldn't have liked it if I didn't have at least one suit in my closet."

"I see." He nods before leading me to a couch. "My wife and I initially planned to go out, but we didn't want to leave Sakura alone on this day, it might not be a wise decision."

I listen to what he says, biting my tongue in order not to comment or say something that might be disrespectful.

"Aside from that, her friends are all in a relationship, and we can't trust her with someone else."

To be honest, I was a bit honored when they called me, but it was still unnerving that I had to escort their daughter on their date when... well, we're not on speaking terms besides during work.

"She's coming."

I look up from Ikichi-san to Kasumi-san, seeing her smiling at her husband and me, before turning to look back up.

My ears pick up the sound of clacking heels, and I follow the line of vision of Sakura's parents, seeing their only daughter looking back at me with wide eyes.

Looks like she wasn't expecting this.


When Ikichi-san had insisted that I hitch a ride with them, I couldn't refuse even if I wanted to. I didn't really like the idea of leaving behind my bike, nor did I feel comfortable at staying in the same car as Sakura when we aren't even "okay" yet.

So you could just imagine what a big relief it was for me to finally step out and take in the fresh air. However, gentlemanly instincts kicked in, and I look back to offer my hand to my unwilling date in order to help her step out of the car.

Judging from the way her eyes were looking distant, she had no idea that she took my hand and even grasped it as I pull her out. By the time she came to, I had already let go and followed Ikichi-san since Kasumi-san had tapped her daughter.

I barely hear their conversation, with Sakura hissing while Kasumi-san remains amuse and innocent.

A little later, Kasumi-san walks pass me and links her arms with her husband's, the scene reminding me how I should act around Sakura since... well, it's only proper as what my mom would have put it.

With that thought, I pull out my right hand from the warmth of my pocket and offer it to Sakura, who was most likely hesitant in taking it.

On our way to the table Ikichi-san had reserved for us, I decide to just make this night at least a little bearable for her, given that she doesn't seem the least bit comfortable staying close to me.

"Sorry."

There. I said it.

"Pardon..?"

And I'll have to say it again. Geez.

"I said I'm sorry."

"For what..?" She asks me, and I could picture her eyes looking so confused.

Did she really have to make me relive those harsh words?

"Last New Year's eve." I explain, my eyes half-closing as they narrow and focus elsewhere. "I should have understood what you were feeling at that time."

She lost her ex, she lost the bastard.

Even if Riku wasn't exactly the best guy out there, she still gave him her heart, she still loved him.

When her brows furrowed, it kind of killed the moment that I ended up raising a brow at her. I wonder why she reacted that way, I mean, I just apologized...

"Just who the heck are you?"

That almost made me stumble. "...What?"

"I never thought of you to be the first one to apologize over something that isn't even your fault."

Maybe she thinks it's not my fault, but I couldn't help but feel that it was.

"Hn." I grunt, grab her hand, and lead her to the dance floor. The moment I turn to face her, her body crashed against mine, and I hold her waist with my free hand and lean down to her ear. "It takes two to tango, Sakura."

I follow the tempo of the music, dancing alongside several couples who were caught in their own world.

Sakura almost tripped at one movement, and her face instantly turned red in embarrassment.

"Sorry. I'm not a very good dancer." She utters in a soft voice. "And also for... yelling at you when you were just trying to help."

I couldn't help the small twitch of my lips and end up smirking. "Forgiven. And... is my apology accepted as well?"

She gave me a sheepish smile, and I was a bit glad that we weren't so uncomfortable with each other any longer. "That depends."

"On what?"

"I'm not that easy Sasuke."

"Hn." I stop moving and let go of her, afterwards, I take a few steps back and bow down a bit with one arm extended towards her, and I look up to meet her gaze and give a small smile. "Will the princess be willing to forgive me if I ask her for another dance?"

Well shit. I didn't think I'd do that – seriously. I just... moved on my own when she said she wasn't that easy, and I... I just didn't know what possessed me to do an embarrassing stunt like that and still have the gall to remain composed.

And what the fuck? I smiled at her.

This has got to be the-

"Pfft."

I stop my train of thoughts when I hear her laughing, feel her hand take mine before positioning herself in my arms.

Our eyes met when she did so, and to rid myself of the awkward feeling, I spoke: "I'm still waiting for an answer."

I thank whatever God was out there that I still remained calm when she placed a hand on my cheek and pushed the strands of my hair away from my face.

Her touch was... addictive.

"You're forgiven."

And her smile took my breath away...

I'm definitely in love with her...


"Did you enjoy yourself tonight Sasuke?"

I turn away from Sakura's disappearing form in the bathroom door and look at her mother.

"Yes, thank you." I answer, nodding my head once.

"No, it's you who we should be thanking." This time, it was Ikichi-san who spoke. "We probably interfered with your original plans for the night."

"No," I shake my head. "I really didn't have anything to do."

"We're thankful that you met our daughter." Kasumi gives me a sad smile before looking at where Sakura headed off to. "She hasn't been the same since... that boy..."

"You mean the bastard." Ikichi-san hisses. "If I see him again, I'll-"

"Dear. Please." Kasumi-san stops her husband from continuing and then meets my gaze. "I just hope that... whoever Sakura will love next, or whoever will love her won't be the same..."

"It's good that she's recovering right now, another blow to her heart might just... be too much." Her father sighs and holds his wife's hand. "But knowing Sakura, she might end up rushing things if she thinks she loves someone."

I look back at the bathroom door where Sakura went into, reflecting on the words of her parents.

Love is a foreign feeling to me, other than being told how it feels, I knew nothing of it. It's different when people claim they love you yet only see what's outside, it's not the kind of love I grew up knowing from my mother.

I may not know how these feelings for Sakura came, but I do know that what I'm feeling is there, and that it's genuine.

I get hurt when she thinks of Riku, when she's crying, when she's looking so forlorn.

I get angry when she's assuming things about me, when she thought I had a girlfriend, when she refuses to meet my eyes.

I'm happy when she's smiling and laughing, my heart skips a few beats when she looks at me and sees me, not right pass me or someone else.

It started last December after spending time with her and her friends, after learning more about her, after seeing her for who she is...

It developed last January, especially during New Years Eve, and I only confirmed it when I got hurt by her words, and when she mentioned his name and not mine.

"Oh, there she is."

I blink and follow Ikichi-san's gaze to see Sakura walking towards us and apologizing for taking so long.

Once more, I lift my arm for her to take, and then lead her to her father's car.

She was silent the whole time, completely opposite with how her parents chatted animatedly as if they were alone.

I think back to the conversation we had a while ago, when she told me more about how she felt for Riku, and how he just betrayed her feelings. When we were nearing the end of it, she had told me with complete determination in her eyes that she'll forget him no matter what.

"Are you sure you're alright?"

I notice how she jumped from my question before looking over at me to give me a smile. "Yeah, don't worry. I think it's time I seriously forget about my ex and move on."

"Hn." I turn away from her to look outside, the car's window reflecting my face. "I'm glad." I say as soft as I could, feeling something heavy lift from my chest, feeling the tension of my muscles relax when she said those words...

"Why?"

I blink and look at her with a raised brow.

"Why are you glad I mean..."

Shit. She heard me.

"Well..." I trail off, unsure of how to explain myself. It isn't the right time yet, I don't want her to … not yet. "I know that... you're always getting hurt whenever you remember him, so by moving on..." I try to meet her gaze, but she was already looking outside, and from what I could see base from her reflection, she seems a bit forlorn. "...you'll be able to heal."

You won't be too broken and confused when I'll tell you I love you.


"Are you sure you don't want to stay for coffee or tea?"

I briefly wonder if Sakura inherited her persistence from her mother...

"It's alright," I tell her. "It's getting late and I should get going. Thank you."

"Oh alright, some other time then?"

"Yes." I nod my head to her, about to leave when I heard Sakura calling me back.

"Oh, wait!"

I stop to look back at her, noting how her parents went upstairs before turning back to her where she held out a box to me.

"Happy Valentine's Day."

I take the box from her and give a small smile, which she returns tenfold. "Thanks." I say, my voice soft. "Night."

"N-Night."

I leave her home with my heart beating fast. I wasn't sure if I want to know what the contents are just yet – if I want to know what her feelings for me are.

By the time I arrive at my place, a light drizzle began, and when I enter my home, the rain falls harder.

I quickly change into a more comfortable set of clothes before heading towards the kitchen where I left the box Sakura had given me. I stare at it for a moment, my anxiousness getting the best of me as I pull off the red ribbon and open the lid of the white box.

A part of me was relieved to see that they were Honmei chocolates, but the other part... well, let's just say I'm currently in a state of shock.

If she gave me Honmei chocolates, that could only mean that she likes me – as in... like, like me.

"Shit." I pick one up and look at it, thinking about my feelings and what I should do before taking a small bite. It was sweet, but not enough to make my throat hurt. But going back to the topic at hand...

Sakura loves me.

...But... there's just something wrong. I just can't seem to accept her confession. Sure I already know that I love her, but...

My thoughts are cut off when I hear loud and continuous knocks on my front door. I quickly stride over to it and open the door, my eyes clashing with emerald green irises.

"Sakura?"

"I..."

"What're you doing here? Get inside!" I pull her in, realizing that she was soaked from top to bottom due to the rain. I quickly dash upstairs and retrieve a towel to hand to her. "Here, dry yourself first, I'll get you some change of clothes..."

"Sasuke..."

I freeze.

Her tone sounded helpless, and I don't know why but it felt as if I was the cause of her sadness.

I hesitantly turn to look at her, my brows slightly furrow as I try to meet her gaze. "We'll talk later." And I hurry over to my room to get some spare clothes for her to change into.

It takes a while for me to find some old clothes that would fit her, and when I went back to her, I hand them over and lead her to a bathroom. I grow more concerned when she just stood there and looking at me.

"You'll catch a cold that way, go get changed."

Sakura just continues looking at me, and I can see how her fingers clench the shirt and shorts she was holding tightly.

"Sakura, hey!" I grab her shoulders and shake her a bit, checking if she was back on earth or if her mind was still wandering. "Saku-" she suddenly wraps her arms around me, and I could feel her face against my chest, feel how she clenches the front of my shirt...

"I..."

Her voice was a lot softer than normal, and a part of me wants to just stay still and listen to what she has to say, but she was still dripping wet.

"Sakura, please." I say to her. "Go get changed first, I don't want you to get sick."

A deep sigh escapes her lips, and I watch her turn towards the bathroom and enter it. Once the door closed, I did not hesitate to lean my back against the wall and slide down to the floor.

What just... happened?


I stare at the two cups which were filled with hot tea, barely aware of Sakura's form a few inches away from mine, the warmth from her body letting me know that she was really sitting on my couch, the same furniture I'm also sitting on.

Outside, the rain didn't let up and only continues pouring heavily, filling up what would have been an awkward silence between Sakura and I.

What should I do? Should I say something or wait for her to speak? Should I comment about the weather- no, that's stupid.

"Sorry."

I blink and turn to face her.

"I'm probably a bother to you right now."

I heard her words, but my eyes were focusing on her actions – at how she kept her head lowered, at how her fingers were curled and clenched the loose shorts I lent her, and how she firmly kept her knees together.

"You're not being a bother Sakura," I tell her, lifting my gaze to her long pink hair which was hiding her face from my view, preventing me from seeing her facial expression. "Why would you think you are?"

"Just a feeling, you know." She replies with a small shrug, the act barely noticeable. "You could be doing other things than sitting here and waiting for me to go home."

I still continue to observe and study her gestures, my eyes not leaving her tense shoulders after she spoke.

"Hn." I keep my gaze on her for a bit more. "I've got nothing better to do."

"You're just saying that."

Her fingers clench tighter.

"No, I'm serious." I tell her.

Another momentary silence pass us, before she speaks again, still refusing to look at me. "So... did you open the box?"

My mouth opens and answers too quickly for my liking. "Aa." And I ended up lowering my head, a bit embarrassed.

"And... did you... taste it?"

"Aa."

"I thought you didn't like sweets?"

I end up closing my eyes and leaning back on the couch. "I don't, but you gave them to me."

That was as indirect as I could get.

"You don't have to force yourself."

And she didn't get my "confession" – damn it. "I'm not." I tell her. "It's just that... I didn't want to not eat at least one, it's like I'm treating what you gave me as trash if that's the case."

"Was it... good?"

I guess this would be a safer topic. "Yeah." I answer. "It's been a while since I had one, actually."

"Honmei..?"

At her chosen word, I dare to look at her, meeting her eyes with mine. "No," I admit, knowing that she wants to know how I'll react. "The taste."

"I'm glad you like it."

And once more, we fell silent, daring the other to proceed with the topic, to thread deeper into dangerous waters – and I took the bait and snap.

"Will you just tell me the truth?"

I'm getting so damn sick and tired of dodging what's obvious. And while I know that my eyes may have scared her right now, I couldn't be bothered to be nice.

"Are you in love with me?"

And damn it all when she started to cry.

"I..." she chokes on a sob, and I fight the urge to pull her into my arms. "I have to go."

I couldn't find my voice when she stood and rushes towards the front door, her hand enclosing onto the knob and struggling to turn it and open the door.

"Sakura." I finally manage to say as I stand and approach her. I boldly place my hand over hers, feeling her freeze from what I had done.

Seeing her facing the door, seeing her standing right in front of me, cornered and trapped... I was tempted to just hug her, to just tell her everything...

"Don't go." I say instead, meaning it. But when she remained silent, I panic a bit and end up saying words I did not plan on voicing out. "It's still raining outside, wait for the storm to pass."

"Just let me go."

My eyes widen slightly at her response until they end up narrowing, and when she slowly turns to face me, I could barely breathe upon seeing her tear-stricken face.

"Let me go."

Something in me snapped so I glare and scoff. I did not bother to worry when she flinched after I slammed one hand against the door next to her head. I lean down to her, intending to just get it over with and kiss her, but something pulled me back – and instead, I look into her eyes. "No." I tell her, daring to move closer to her face. "I won't let you."

Not when I love you, not when I'm going to lose you.

"Then say you love me!" She yells, more tears falling from her eyes. "Say..." her voice hitches and weakens. "...that you want to be with me..."

I could feel a constricting pain on my chest at the sight of her crying.

"Tell me that you care for me, more than a friend, that you've fallen for me, that you're returning my feelings..."

And it was my turn to break down – inwardly.

Because soldiers, former or not...

"I can't..."

"Why can't you? I love you Sasuke! I love you so much!"

My head shakes a bit. "Sakrua I... I don't..." I try to keep my tone normal, try to keep myself calm and level-headed, but everything I was taught to do, to act...

...cannot express what they truly feel...

"I can't."

"It's just four words, Sasuke! 'I love you too!' It's so simple!" She suddenly takes a hold of my shirt and pulls me closer, my lips almost touching hers but she stops at the right moment to keep them from pressing against each other. Slowly, she pulls back and lowers her gaze, her eyes looking defeated and so forlorn.

...soldiers aren't allowed cry.

"I don't want to hurt you." I admit in the end, because I'm afraid – I'm scared that I might do more damage than her ex did, I'm scared that she might only be using me as a rebound, and until those thoughts are gone, I can't tell her my feelings, otherwise, I won't be able to trust her.

Instantly, fresh tears came falling down from her eyes, and I didn't bother to stop myself from pulling her into an embrace, wanting to tell her through my actions how I really feel.

"Just let me go."

And I only tighten my grip around her when she said that again. "No." I say to her. "I won't."

Not when I already know that there can be something between us.

"Please." She begs, sobbing. "Spare me from this."

My eyes shut tight, as if feeling that same pain she's going through.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

"Just let me go home, and I'll forget about this."

"I said..." I breathe and refrain from loosening my grip. "I won't."

"You're hurting me Sasuke..."

My eyes snap open.

"You're hurting me the way Riku did..."

I couldn't find the strength to fight back when she pushes me away.

"You're both the same... in terms of breaking my heart."

I let her words sink deeper, only realizing that she had left while I was caught up in my own thoughts.

I didn't know how long I was standing there, staring at where she once was, but when lightning flashed and cracked, I finally snap out of it and shake my head. My fists clench tightly for a split second, before my fingers uncurl and move to close the door.

I walk towards the phone in the living room and call her parents. When her mother answered, I asked if Sakura was home, and when she said that she just arrived and asked what had happened, I merely apologized before saying a soft good night.

At first, I had considered going back to my room, but I ended up lying on the couch and staring at the ceiling with half-closed eyes.

Why do I keep hurting people?

Don't hesitate to cry and rely on me,
I decided long ago to accept all your burdens.

To be continued…



March: Deep Understanding

The sight of Suigetsu's forehead against Sakura's made my blood boil, and the fact that I knew of his perverse tendencies didn't help me calm down at all.

I quickly walk over to them, pushing away the people who were blocking my path. I glared at some women who tried to pull their seductive acts on me, and when I was nearing them, Kiba had instantly hit the idiot's head.

"Give her a break Suigetsu, I doubt that she's still single."

I sigh in relief at that before proceeding to them, eyes narrowing when I heard Suigetsu's words.

"Bah. Who gives a shit?"

"I do." I almost snarl. "I'd appreciate it if you take your arm off of her, now."


A/N:You know another song that might fit this? "Manazashi Daydream" by Yuu Sakai. It's an opening theme of Nodame Cantabile season three.

Here's the English translation, taken from gendou(.)com

Clearly 30° to my right,
Silky, Long like Niagara
Charming
The faint smell of your shampoo
Fluttered at the tip of my nose
Cloudy

To be covered with afflictions from morning to the top of the sky
Another simulator
But I can not say anything

Looking straight at Do
My heart goes Fortissimo
Asleep or awake, I think of U
Inside my eyelids is a special seat
Feelings you from this overcrowded place
Ah, whatever am I gonna do?

My way of deciding ABC
Teach me how cherry blossoms dance in front
Do It !
Thinking about your feelings
Moment by moment time exceeds something this much

As if I was clumsily hit and my jaw broke
But it's fine
It's easy
Right, I can not say anything

A rock like me ought to confess his feelings
Looking at you pianissimo
Asleep or awake I long for U
Inside my eyelids is a special seat
Feelings you from this overcrowded place
Ah, how is it this serious?

I can not say…. anything

Looking straight at Do
My heart goes Fortissimo
Asleep or awake, I think of U
Inside my eyelids is a special seat
Feelings you from this overcrowded place
Ah, it's too dazzling!

I still can not see your eyes

A rock like me ought to confess his feelings
Looking at you pianissimo
Asleep or awake I long for U
Inside my eyelids is a special seat
Feelings you from this overcrowded place
Ah, how is it this serious?