A/N- hey guys! I'm so sorry I haven't updated in a while… it's been a week, I think. I've been kind of busy…well, more like lazy. Actually, I've been reading The Host (also by Stephenie Meyer, of course) and it's SO good! I've been doing nothing but reading lately and I finished it in a week. Sorry to keep anyone waiting, if anyone has been…well, anyways, here's the next chapter.
My mind was blank. I didn't comprehend Alice's words. I didn't think they should be used together in that order. Alice? Staying? But…no. That just…didn't make sense. Why would she stay? And Edward…
Edward. What in the world did she mean, he still loved me? Edward? Love me? Boring, uninteresting, lowly, human me. And Edward was…Edward. Words like "angelic" or "exquisite" or "marvelous" didn't even begin to explain his incredibleness.
And Alice thought he wanted me back! It was insane. It was stupid, stupid, stupid to think that Edward loved me!
And yet, it was so…tempting.
I wanted to believe her. I really, truly did…but I couldn't. That voice was telling me not to. Don't start! It warned frantically. We're in enough trouble as it is. Don't you make it worse!
I had to listen to it. And this time, it was easier than before. Last time, I was just hoping he still had some friendly emotion towards me, even in the slightest way. That was almost fathomable. But believing he was still in love with me? It was easy to not let my imagination run wild on this one. This was not something even my crazy brain could begin to picture.
"What?" I asked vacantly. I couldn't think of anything else to say. There was no other way to sum up the impossibility of Alice's words.
Alice exhaled sharply. "Bella," she said. "Don't you see? The only reason we left was to protect you. Well," she said, rolling her eyes, "that was Edward's reason. The rest of us thought it was pretty stupid. We didn't want to leave. But he just wouldn't listen." She seemed disgruntled, and a little angry, thinking of this memory I didn't dare believe. "I saw that he wouldn't change his mind any time soon, despite how persistent we all were. He was even more determined. He made us all leave. We felt so awful. Esme especially…" she smiled. "She'll be so happy to see you." Her smiled faltered, faded, and she sighed. "Before we left, he was already sinking into — well, I can't truthfully call it a depression…it was so much worse than that. He missed you, he was dyeing from it, and we hadn't even left." She was abruptly angry. "And look what good leaving's done! He's been moping for half a year, he won't even make contact with anyone, and here you are, fainting at the sound of his name." She shook her head in exasperation. "What are we going to do with you two?"
I wasn't sure what to feel. Her words were so sure, so confident…she seemed positive of how Edward felt. Plus, she, of all people, would know if they were really coming back. She saw it as a definite thing, not a maybe. An absolute yes, a straight shot.
That made me want to hope.
However, hoping was still overshadowed by the huge amount of disbelief coursing through me.
"I…I'm…confused," was all I could get out.
Alice just shook her head at me. "Edward's never stopped loving you," she explained again, more quietly than before. "He truly, truly loves you." I continued to stare at her blankly, despite the swell of emotions rising and falling inside me.
"Well," she said, seeing my lack of response, "I suppose he'll be able to explain it better…he'll be here sometime tomorrow." Her eyes drifted away from me, focusing on some point in the future. Her stare was glassy for a moment before she collected herself. "I can't tell exactly when…hmm," she said, seeming disgruntled. "I wonder why…oh, well, it should be sometime in the morning," she concluded.
My stomach plummeted. He was coming? So soon? I couldn't deny any longer the truth in Alice's words — he was definitely coming. I wasn't sure how long he was staying…but he was coming. Coming tomorrow. I had little over twenty four hours.
However, I could worry later — there were some things that were still impossible to accept. Like how Alice said he loved me? And that she thought he might stay? That they would all stay? My brain swirled in confusion. I had no idea what to think. My thoughts buzzed distractingly inside my head, but I couldn't find answers.
Alice sensed my distress. "Don't worry," she murmured encouragingly. "Things will work themselves out." She noticed my appearance for the first time and winced. "Ah…I… how about we get you cleaned up? Ooh! I know," she exclaimed, brightening, "I'll give you a makeover!"
An old, long-lost sense of chagrin washed through me. Alice with makeup and hair products could be deadly. She used that mascara wand like a weapon of mass destruction…which, in her hands, it was. I shuddered.
Alice scowled. "Wipe that look off your face! It'll be fun!"
I glared at her in disbelief. "Fun? Your idea of fun is attacking me with eyeliner and hair curlers. That's not fun, it's assault."
Besides, I thought, what was there to be made up for? He wasn't coming until tomorrow and tonight's sleep would surely mess up any progress she made on my neglected hair. Plus, Alice's attempts to make me "pretty" wouldn't make him want me a million years anyway.
I shied away from that though. There would be plenty of time for worrying later.
She pouted. "Please, Bella? I won't go all-out. I'll just make your hair look nice, maybe a little mascara, some lipstick…I mean," she said, seeing the look on my face and backtracking, "Let me just do your hair! Please??"
I sighed. "Fine, Alice. Whatever." There wasn't anything I could do to stop her in her makeover moods, anyways. Plus, I was a sucker for her guilt trips.
"Yay!" Alice cheered. But after a moment's celebration, she was all business. "Let's get you showered."
After I was clean, she began doing her thing. I wasn't really sure what she was doing — I couldn't read the fancy hair products she used, so I wasn't sure what they were for. She pinned up my hair in complicated sections and twisted it every which way as she blow-dried, and I wasn't sure what result she was aiming for. But this didn't really matter — it wasn't like she needed my help. I thought of the destruction I could do with one of her massive, scorching flat-irons and shuddered.
This left me sitting in an old chair she had brought up from the basement in front of the bathroom mirror for several hours, doing nothing. I didn't like this — it left me too much time to think.
What would he think of me, when he did come? Would he really be happy to see me, as Alice said? Or was that just to comfort me? I didn't think Alice would lie to me that way, but I couldn't be sure. And what if it was all lies? Would he hate me? Would he look at me with that same cold, hard stare he had in the forest? Would he regard with that apathetic silence, as he had done for so long before he left?
Alice could easily read these thoughts on my face. "He'll be delighted to see you," she assured me. "Absolutely ecstatic. There's no need to worry about that."
I didn't like the way she phrased it — like there was some other thing to worry about. I tried to find a double meaning in her words, searching her face for something I missed, but she ducked her head at that moment, searching for some product in her bag. I had a feeling it was on purpose.
She continued her pointless attempt at assurance throughout the whole torturous beauty process, trying to reason with me, to tell me not to worry, that it would be okay. After a while, I stopped listening, knowing whatever words she said would have no effect in calming me.
Eventually, she finished. I had to admire her work: my hair was a smooth, glassy wall, flowing past my shoulders and ending gracefully at my waist. She was a miracle with a blow-dryer, I had to admit.
"Thanks, Alice," I said with as much grace as I could. Despite my hair, sitting through those hours had been tedious work. "Looks great."
"I know," she sighed fondly, and grinned when I rolled my eyes. "So, what do you want to do now?"
"Whatever," I said, forlorn. I didn't really care much at this point.
"We should drive up to Olympia and go shopping!" she exclaimed. "You definitely need it," she added, eyeing my sweats. "And it would be a good chance to show off your hair."
"Whatever," I sighed again, shrugging. I guessed I could use a couple things.
She beamed joyfully, like she didn't already know what my answer would be before she even voiced her question.
We reached the city quickly, what with Alice's crazy driving. We went to just about every store in the mall. She forced me into every dressing room with armloads of clothes, insisting on buying almost everything that fit, despite my feeble protests.
All in all, it wasn't the most pleasant of experiences, but it was what I needed, in a way — between rapidly changing clothes and struggling to carry our boatload of bags, I didn't have much time to think about anything but not tripping.
When we got home, we towed the heavy bags up to my room. I dropped them the second Alice opened my door and carried my tired body to my bed as fast as my legs allowed. Alice's shopping trips were brutal.
Alice was, of course, bright and chipper as always. She wasn't tired, even after six hours of ruthlessly running from store to store. She pranced to my bed and perched herself next to my immobile form. "So," she mused, "I suppose you're not really up for anything else today?"
The only response I could coax out of my body was to roll my eyes lazily.
Alice sighed lightly. "Okay," she said. "I'll see you in the morning, then." She stood daintily and tiptoed to the door. "Goodnight, Bella," she whispered, and shut the door quietly.
I wasn't sure why I was so tired, but I couldn't even work up the energy to get into my pajamas, let alone brush my teeth or any other bathroom routines. It was true, shopping with Alice was work, and I expected to be exhausted, but I was dead beat. I guessed all the bizarre events that had just taken place were taking their toll on me.
A dull sense of memento washed through my tired brain. That reminded me…Edward. He was coming sometime tomorrow. A fiery combination of elation and panic drifted through me vaguely before sleep pulled me under.
When I woke, I wasn't confused or disoriented, like before. My mind felt clear and open and curiously at ease. I could feel something warm soaking onto my face, my arms…sunlight? How odd. I couldn't remember there being sun for such a long time.
I lay still, listening to the steady pounding of my heart. My upper arms pounded in time with my pulse. Stupid shopping trip.
After I second, I noticed something gently tickling my face. Stroking me from my temple to my chin…up, down, up, down. It was cold and hard, but had the lightest touch. Something stirred in my memory, and my lips trembled ever so slightly.
Something — someone — took in a slight breath. The movement on my face stopped.
I drew open my eyelids in shock.
Edwards's glorious face filled my vision. I soaked it up without hesitation, letting his features riddle themselves into my memory. Who knew how long it would be here? I had been awake less than a minute, but I didn't pause before memorizing his face. There wasn't time for indecisions.
The smooth pale skin that spanned flawlessly across his features, his perfectly disheveled bronze hair, the fluent line of his jaw, the graceful curve of his lips, and the unbearable golden perfection that was his eyes.
He was flawless. He was magnificent. He was breathtaking.
But was he mine?
His lips spread into that crooked grin I had been denied for so long. His voice—his impeccable, beautiful, stunning voice—filled my ears, my thoughts, my heart. It filled my very being, bringing with it a wondrous relief that left me breathless.
"Bella."
A/N- So? How was it? Please review, and I'll try to write some more this weekend.
