(Here we go! Chapter four! I know last chapter was very serious, dealing with some of the aftermath that Quinn is dealing with. This chapter does as well, but I have to say, I think you are all going to LOVE the ending of this chapter. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review. -Jordon)
I didn't know what to do. I was all alone. I wanted Noah by my side more than I could even say, but he wasn't there. Tears continued to flood down my face.
Suddenly the front door jiggled. I clutched the blankets closer and tried to sink into the couch. It jiggled again, and my sobs intensified. Then the door was thrown open and my mother stumbled across the threshold.
"Mom!" My voice came out as a strangled gasp. When she saw me crying on the couch, she rushed over and kneeled by me, brushing my hair away from wear it had stuck to my cheeks.
"Quinnie, what's wrong? Is it the baby?" I shook my head no, I was approaching hysteria and could barely breathe. "Wait, where is Noah? Did you have a fight with him?" Once again I shook my head.
"No- he's at- he went- home to- his Ma. I was- I had- he was back! He was back!"
My mother didn't respond. We had reached an unspoken agreement that we would never discuss the months I had been missing from my life. She hadn't attended the trials, for the sole reason of not wanting to know. She stroked my hair in silence and clutched my hand. Slowly my breathing slowed and my tears dried.
"Mom." My voice was still very watery.
"Yes dear?"
"I'm scared."
She paused. "What of honey?"
My chin trembled and I had to concentrate on not bursting into tears again. "Everything. I'm scared of the baby getting sick or dying, I'm scared I won't be a good mother, I'm afraid that Noah is going to find someone better, not so broken, I'm afraid of being hurt again."
She sighed and rubbed her eyes. "I don't know what to tell you baby. The world… the world is a scary place. You know that. I know that. We just… have to press on anyway I guess." We sat in silence.
"Would you like to come sleep with me tonight? I think it will make both of us feel better." I nodded. She stood and helped me to my feet. Ten minutes later we were both cuddling in her bed, watching the home design network.
I woke early the next morning. I lay in bed, counting my breaths and putting off getting up. Eventually though I heard the tell tae signs of Noah coming home and went to meet him in the living room. I tried make myself look composed but knew inside it was useless. My eyes were swollen and I'm sure bloodshot. Sure enough as soon as he saw me he dropped his duffel and came to stand by me.
"What's wrong, Q?"
"Nothing!" I tried to smile at him. I didn't want him to know about the nightmare. I didn't want him to worry and I didn't want to admit that I was still so terrified.
"Bullshit. Your entire face is swollen. Is it the baby? Are you feeling okay? Do I need to call Dr. Witcher?"
"No." I sighed. "Last night I had a nightmare, it's fine." I turned away from him and went into the kitchen, intent on making myself a bowl of cereal.
"I knew I should have stayed." I shook the fruity off brand cereal into the bowl.
"It's fine Noah." I peered into the fridge looking for milk.
"Quinn it's not fine! You were scared and I wasn't here to protect you!"
I slammed the refrigerator shut and turned to face him, hands planted on my waist. "Yes, because I am completely incapable of doing a single thing to help myself. I'm just some stupid girl who couldn't protect herself from the most horrific period of her life. I'm just some stupid little whore who… who…" My voice caught in the lump in my throat again.
Noah stepped forward and gently placed his hands on my shoulders, eyes full of concern. "Quinn…" I pulled away from him. "None of this your fault. None."
I scoffed. "No Noah. This is all my fault. Every single bit of it. It is all, my, FAULT!"
His eyes widened with shock. "No it's not!" His voice rose to meet mine in intensity. "You are the most beautiful, strong, wonderful woman I have ever met. I hope our daughter is half the woman you are. And she will be, because you are also the most gentle, loving, caring person I have ever met. And it tears me apart to hear you think of yourself any other way. I love you Quinn. And.. I think you need to think about maybe talking to someone about how you feel."
I sank into a chair. "Maybe that's a good idea. I'm tired of being angry. I'm tired of being terrified… Do you think it would help?"
He came to stand behind me, rubbing my shoulders. "Well, it can't hurt Q. Worst case scenario, you go and see someone and you hate it, and we laugh it off as pointless. But maybe they can help." I leaned back and looked up at him.
"Okay. I will ask Dr. Witcher to recommend someone."
He leaned down and kissed me on the forehead. I stood up and wrapped my arms around him, burying my face in his chest. He held me close and softly rubbed my back. And breathing in his clean, masculine scent, I felt safe.
Two days later My mom and I were walking into a local Italian restaurant. It was my eighteenth birthday. It felt strange that I was only now considered a legal adult. I was thirty weeks pregnant, had been through the worst five months of my life, and had testified at my attackers' trials, but up until today I was not allowed to vote or sign my own release forms.
Noah was at the local hardware store. He had been working there for the past week or so, trying to save up money for the baby. SO it was just my mother and I for the day.
We approached the hostess and my mother gave her our name. She nodded and led us to the back of the restaurant. "Okay you're just going to finish walking down this hallway and take a right, your waitress will be with you shortly." We nodded and kept walking.
I was talking to my mom about an Old Navy commercial I had seen when we turned the corner. Then my eyes fell on Noah, standing in front of a door in a button down shirt, holding a bouquet of flowers. My face split into a huge smile. "What are you doing here?"
"You didn't think I would really miss your birthday, did you?" He handed me the flowers and gave me a hug and a quick kiss. Then he wrapped his arm around my shoulders and guided me through the door.
Inside was a group of people dressed up holding various gifts and balloons. Santana, My sister Frannie and her husband, Tina, Noah's mother and sister. They immediately began to sing:
Happy birthday to you…
My eyes began to tear up. In that moment I felt extremely loved and very content. We all sat down and began to talk while perusing the menu. My surprise party was wonderful. Then at the end, it took a very interesting turn.
Noah had me stood up beside him and called everyone's attention. "Well I would like to thank you all for coming. It was great that we could all gather and celebrate Quinn's birthday. But I have to admit, I had an ulterior motive." He quickly knelt beside me and reached into his pocket. He produced a small box and opened it. Inside was diamond ring.
"Lucy Quinn Fabray, will you make me the luckiest guy on Earth, and marry me?"
I covered my mouth as tears began to once again flow down my cheeks. I couldn't believe it. Despite all of my imperfections, despite our unconventional coming together, Noah wanted to marry me.
"Yes Noah. I would love to marry you."
(What did you think? Review and tell me! -Jordon)
