The next day Bella was distracted; she couldn't focus on anything, and her students caught her off guard numerous times.
"Miss Bella is acting silly today!" one of the girls giggled.
Bella blushed and promptly redirected her thoughts, which had been lingering on Emmett and Edward, back to their read along. The students loved that Miss Bella, who was always so determined and driven, was having an off day. They quickly pointed out the passage they had stalled on, and Bella picked up, reading a strong, clear voice.
"Bella," Mrs. Cope called, stopping her just before Bella left the classroom. "May I have a word, please?"
Bella felt her cheeks flush again as her stomach dropped. She really needed to get it together. She shifted her messenger bag to her other shoulder and crossed the room again, approaching the front of the classroom.
Mrs. Cope sat behind her desk, a pair of purple eyeglasses perched on her nose. Bella had been student teaching under Mrs. Cope for almost two months, and she had never asked her to stay behind.
"Bella, Fallon was right. You have been acting silly lately," Mrs. Cope frowned, her voice concerned. "Is everything all right?"
She bit her lip, wondering what the best answer was. She certainly couldn't tell Mrs. Cope that she was freaking out over what Alice told Edward about her relationship status.
The past two days had been way too busy between school and work to go over to Alice's, and it was too sensitive a subject to bring up on the phone.
Alice had a history of acting twitchy when it came to Edward. She barely spoke about him and rarely pointed out his better qualities, but Bella knew it stemmed from a place of love. Alice thought that, in some twisted way, she was protecting Bella from him. If they never talked about him, maybe Bella would fall out of love and forget about him.
However, that didn't work through high school or her first three years of college, so it seemed pointless to employ that tactic now.
Unless Alice's loyalties had switched and she was now protecting Emmett, too.
"Bella?" Mrs. Cope prompted.
"Oh, sorry," Bella mumbled. She tucked her hair behind her ear. "Sorry. I'm just a little stressed out. You know, my last year is wrapping up and I'm worried about my certification tests."
Mrs. Cope's face softened. "Oh, Bella, I don't think you have to worry. You're such a bright girl. You just need to keep your wits about you now, when it really matters."
"I'll make sure I do," Bella promised fervently.
Mrs. Cope smiled and sent her on her way, and Bella practically ran out of the elementary school.
She was right, of course. Bella worked her ass off for the past few years, making sure her grades were perfect. She scored a full ride to college, but even with that financial support she still needed to work, so she found a job at the local mall.
Graduation loomed before her; in just a few months she'd be done student teaching and have the certification to run her own classroom. She couldn't afford to lose focus.
But…just for tonight…since she didn't have to work, and she didn't have homework…well, maybe tonight she'd go to Alice's.
An hour later she was banging on the door, hoping Alice didn't have a lecture in store for her.
Jasper opened the door, a big, shit-eating grin spreading across his face when he saw her. "Well, hello, Bella. What a lovely surprise."
"Yeah," Bella shrugged. She was a bit suspicious of his overly-friendly welcome. Jasper was usually more laid back. "I didn't have work tonight, so I thought I'd stop by and see Alice."
"This is perfect," Jasper replied, still wearing that huge smile. "We were actually just talking about you. You know, wedding stuff. Come in."
Bella stepped through the doorway, wondering what she was getting into. Jasper shut the door and then she followed him into the kitchen. And that was when she saw the reason behind Jasper's amusement.
Edward was seated at the kitchen table, his head thrown back in mid-laugh over something Alice had said. Bella's insides immediately did somersaults.
"Bella!" Alice exclaimed, scrambling to her feet. She looked back and forth between Bella and Edward, and the effect was almost comical. "Um, ummm, hi Bella."
"Hi Alice," Bella said, forcing a smile. She couldn't exactly ignore Edward, what with him sitting right there. She made herself look at him, and was surprised to see his intense green eyes staring right back at her. "Hi, Edward."
"Hello, Bella," he greeted her smoothly.
"I didn't know you were coming over," Alice said, coming around the table. "Did you call? Of course you did. I don't know where my phone is. Do you want something to drink? Maybe I should get some dinner going or – "
"Ali," Jasper drawled. "Sit down, sweetheart."
"Bella, we were discussing the bachelor and bachelorette parties," Edward said, turning his full attention to her.
Bella was startled by his directness. His eyes locked on hers, and for a moment she was speechless. She couldn't remember a time when Edward voluntarily struck up a conversation with her. "Oh…okay, well, what about them, exactly?"
"I like your sweater," Alice blurted out. "It's very teachery."
Jasper rolled his eyes and Bella felt her cheeks burn at Alice's very obvious attempt to change the subject. Was she honestly that worried about Bella speaking with Edward? It wasn't like she was about to jump him, for God's sake.
Although, he did look really good. He made those jeans and white t-shirt look practically indecent. His reddish hair stood out wildly, and for the millionth time in her life, Bella wondered what it would feel like to slip her fingers through those thick locks. A day's worth of stubble covered his jaw, and when his full lips broke into a smile, they revealed a mouth of white, even teeth.
"Jasper doesn't want to have a bachelor party," Edward told her, the humor evident in his voice. "He doesn't see the point of it."
"I don't need to go out to a strip club," Jasper insisted. "I'm getting married. I know what I want, and it's Alice. I don't want to go to a strip club."
Edward laughed out loud. "The strip club isn't for you. It's for me and Emmett and the rest of the boys."
His eyes flickered to her face, maybe looking for some kind of reaction to Emmett's name. Bella didn't know what kind of reaction was the right one, so she just looked at Jasper. "I think that's great, Jasper."
Jasper nodded. "And I don't want Ali to go to one, either."
"What!" Bella immediately protested. "Listen, Alice gave me specific instructions, way back in tenth grade, as to what kind of wedding she wanted. And I'm sorry, Jasper, but she wants a strip club." She looked at Alice. "Don't you?"
Alice looked at Bella with a scandalous expression. She hissed, "Bella, you aren't supposed to tell the boys that!"
"Oh," Bella sank into her seat. She looked at Jasper, who looked very unhappy with his bride-to-be. "Sorry."
"Why do you want to go to some seedy club and have an oiled-up stranger rub all over you?" Jasper asked, crossing his arms over his chest and scowling.
"Baby, it's not really like that," Alice argued. "They're not all seedy. And it's just for fun, you know? Hang out with my ladies, celebrating my last night as a single girl."
"You're not single," Jasper replied, his voice rising. "It makes it sound like you need to get your last hurrahs in that night, because for the rest of your terrible life you'll be chained to me."
"Jasper, no!" Alice gasped. "I don't – how could you – "
"Bella, can I talk to you in the living room?" Edward asked, standing up. "Best man, maid of honor, I'm sure we have some details to hammer out."
Bella looked anxiously between Jasper and Alice before following Edward out of the room. She was grateful for his intervention, but she felt terrible for causing what sounded like a legitimate argument between her two friends.
"They'll be okay," Edward assured her. "Jasper's been acting like a girl lately. I think he's just starting to feel stressed out."
He sat down on the couch and looked at her expectantly. Bella crossed her arms over her chest and stood there awkwardly. Edward laughed and patted the seat cushion next to him. "Why don't you sit down?"
"Okay," Bella mumbled, tripping on the corner of the carpet and stumbling across the room. Her face was flaming by the time she actually sat down next to him.
Edward chuckled and shook his head. "You never really outgrew that, did you?"
"Outgrew what?" Bella asked.
"Your second left foot," he teased.
Bella laughed and sat back in her seat, relaxing slightly. "I guess not."
"Do you remember that time you sprained your ankle and I took you to the homecoming dance in high school?" he asked, smiling crookedly.
Well, it was actually the eighth grade formal, and her ankle had been broken, but Bella knew what he meant. She was surprised he remembered it at all.
"You wore that green dress," he continued, shocking the hell out of her. "It made your eyes look hazel."
Bella didn't know what to say. Edward, who barely bothered to speak to her, was suddenly reminiscing and talking about her eyes? It was nice and all, but felt completely surreal. It didn't make sense.
"Yeah, it was fun," she replied, rubbing her arm.
Edward shifted in his seat and angled his legs toward her. He started to reach out and touch her, but paused, and instead dropped his hand to his lap. He sighed heavily. "Look, Bella, I know we've never really been friends. I don't want - I mean, I guess what I'm trying to say is…"
Despite her mind's pessimistic rationale, her heart began pulsing erratically as Edward began to squirm. What brought about this dramatic change in his behavior? The living room suddenly seemed smaller, and the couch itself seemed cozier.
"Yes?" she urged, trying to steel herself against his honeyed voice.
"I want to be your friend," he said strongly.
Suddenly his warm hand was on her thigh, burning through her jeans, and Bella nearly jumped out of her skin. He laughed at her startled reaction and withdrew it quickly.
"Sorry," he said apologetically.
"It's okay," she murmured. "But…why, Edward? Why do you want to be friends now?"
It was difficult to look at him as anyone other than Edward, her lifelong crush. It was impossible to forget all of those times he made her feel invisible. Each act of neglect, of indifference, broke her heart. Over the years, though, the raw pain and anger had dissolved, leaving only an aching longing in its wake.
Now, to be so close to him, and to have his undivided attention on her, was intoxicating. Bella felt the years slip away and she suddenly felt like a simpering teenager again.
"I was talking with my mom the other day and she said…well, that's not important." Edward smiled but quickly sobered, and his gaze burned her with its intensity. "You're important to me, Bella. My friends are important to me. I just thought you should know that."
"I didn't really know that you considered me a friend," Bella admitted, feeling like such an idiot for even saying it aloud. It sounded so juvenile.
"I guess we've never been particularly close," Edward shrugged. "But we have a history, you know? We've known each other for years."
Bella nodded. Forks was a small town, and it had been nice to have a support system in place when she moved to Seattle for college. Except…Edward was never really part of that support system. He hovered on the outside of her circle of friends, always just out of reach.
She was having trouble wrapping her mind around the concept of him being an actual friend.
"I guess that sounded kind of stupid." Edward looked crestfallen. He reached up and his hand smoothed back his hair again. "Sorry. I just….I don't know."
"No, it's okay," Bella assured him. "It's just, like you said, we've never really been all that close. I'm just a little surprised."
"That's my fault," he frowned. "I haven't been a very good friend. But I'm going to change that, Bella."
"You are?" Bella squeaked.
He laughed. "Yes. I think we could be really good friends. If you'll give me the chance, that is."
Bella felt her cheeks flush. She was so out of her element. "Yes, of course."
Edward smiled brightly and their eyes caught and held. They were still locked in that intimate gaze when someone cleared her throat in the doorway. Bella jumped, as though she had been scalded, and jerked her attention to Alice.
"Sorry," Alice said in a saccharine voice. "Everything's fine now. Edward, Jasper is running out for some Chinese. He wants to know if you'll go with him."
"Sure," Edward said agreeably. He stood up and crossed the room, placing a kiss on the top of Alice's head. "Bye, Bella."
He couldn't see the angry sparks flying out of Alice's eyes, but Bella sure as hell could. She smiled meekly, ignoring Alice's death stare. "Bye, Edward."
Alice turned and watched Edward leave. She whirled back around and her hands settled on her hips. "What the hell are you doing, Bella?"
Her indignant tone immediately upset Bella. They hadn't done anything wrong. She hated sounding and feeling so defensive, but it was true. "We were just talking."
"It looked awful cozy," Alice snapped. "Don't jerk Emmett around. If you're honestly not over Edward, then you shouldn't be dating Emmett."
"Stop attacking me," Bella said. Her calm voice belied her inner turmoil. She stood up and grabbed her bag. "I'm not jerking around anyone. Edward wants to be my friend. That's all. I can be friends with anyone I want, and for the record, Emmett and I are not dating. We've been hanging out a lot but we aren't exclusive."
Alice stared at her in disbelief, then rolled her eyes. "Sit down, Swan."
"Alice, I'm not – "
"Just shut up and sit down," Alice huffed. She dropped onto the couch, sitting exactly where Edward had just been. "I'm sorry. But I don't want Emmett to get hurt. He really likes you, Bella, and I know how you are with Edward."
Bella bristled. Her stomach had begun to tighten up into a bunch of knots. "And that means?"
"Seriously, Bella?" Alice sighed. "You never really got over him, did you? I know you liked him all through high school. And I know when we moved here you still had a thing for him. But Bella, he was never really into you…I thought you moved on."
Alice spoke only the truth, but her blunt language caused tears to prick Bella's eyes. She looked away but Alice knew her too well.
"Don't cry, Bella. I just want you to be happy," Alice said softly. "If Edward didn't realize how awesome you were back then, then he doesn't deserve you now. And you've been so happy lately…I thought you and Emmett were really clicking."
"We are clicking," Bella sniffled. "He's amazing. He's almost too amazing."
"Too amazing?" she asked skeptically.
"He's so sweet," Bella shrugged. "And he cooks. He takes care of this kid, Seth. He's, like, perfect."
Alice snorted. "Oh, please. This is Emmett that we're talking about. He's obviously on his best behavior. Give him another week and he'll be his usual disgusting self in front of you."
Bella laughed and some of the terrible tension in her chest loosened. "Yeah, you're probably right."
"You owe it to yourself to give this thing with Emmett a try," Alice continued. "I want you to be happy, Bella. You're such an amazing person."
This time, Bella rolled her eyes. Alice leaned over and bumped into her. "Stop that. You're my best friend. You're like a sister to me, and I love you."
Bella hugged her tightly. "I love you, too."
"So…just be careful, okay?" Alice pleaded, her expression anxious again. "Be friends with Edward, but don't let it go any further."
"I would never cheat on Emmett," Bella said woodenly. It felt awful that Alice would even insinuate that.
"I know, I know that," Alice said quickly. "But I know it's different with Edward, too."
Bella nodded. Their conversation left a bad taste in her mouth and she felt acutely uncomfortable. Alice turned on the television and after a moment, asked Bella if she would stay for dinner. Chinese with the boys.
The last thing Bella wanted to do was explore her new friendship with Edward in front of Alice. She would catalogue every look, every bit of conversation – and then scrutinize them. She would make Bella feel guilty, like she was doing something wrong.
And truth be told, Bella wanted to be friends with Edward.
She wanted to know if he was at all similar to the man she had fallen in love with, to the one she had mentally constructed. There was nothing wrong with that, and she took offense that Alice thought the worst of her.
So, she declined the dinner offer. Bella stood up and slung her bag over her shoulder. "I'm actually pretty tired, and I have some studying to do."
"Oh, okay," Alice replied, looking disappointed. "Give me a call tomorrow."
"I will," Bella promised. She left quickly, grateful that she didn't run into Edward and Jasper on the way.
Instead of going home, though, she drove to Emmett's. She was tired, but more than that, she was upset. Alice really hurt her feelings, and Bella wondered if there was any truth behind her words. Had she really never gotten over Edward? Bella decided not to pursue that line of thought, at least not tonight.
It took him a long time to come to the door, and when Emmett opened it, it was clear that he had been sleeping. Bella wanted to feel bad for waking him, but when she saw his sleepy face all of her anxiety disappeared, and all she could feel was relief.
She rushed him, throwing her arms around his neck. Emmett staggered back a few steps but quickly recovered, hugging her back.
"Are you okay?" he asked, his voice muffled by her throat.
She nodded into his chest and Emmett led her into his darkened house. The television was on in the living room, casting flickering lights into the otherwise dark room. "I was just watching TV."
"You were sleeping," Bella corrected him. She finally began to feel some of that guilt.
Emmett shrugged, a sleepy smile on his face. His grey t-shirt was rumpled and he wore a pair of low-slung navy sweatpants.
"Can I watch TV with you for a little while?" she asked.
Emmett held out his hand wordlessly. Bella let her bag hit the floor with a thunk and took his hand. He stretched out on the couch, taking up most of the room, and nestled her against his side. Bella sighed contentedly. This felt good. Really good.
He was warm and solid, and Bella wanted to stay like that forever. He began to play with her hair and her eyes fluttered shut.
"Emmett," she whispered drowsily. "Will you be my boyfriend?"
She felt his chest rumble behind her back as he laughed. She didn't feel embarrassed; she smiled along with him. Then his lips brushed against her temple, and Bella felt her heart swell with an emotion she had never felt before.
"Of course," he whispered. "Go to sleep now. I'll take care of you."
So Bella let herself drift off, feeling more at ease wrapped in Emmett's arms than anywhere else in her life.
She woke up hours later, when Emmett was carrying her to bed. He turned down the sheets and tucked her in, and the bed linens smelled just like him. When he finally slipped under the covers, wearing only a pair of boxer briefs, Bella snuggled against him.
The snuggling didn't last very long, because her hands began wandering and then Emmett growled, and suddenly she was naked and on her back.
They both slept very well that night.
Thanks to RoseArcadia, Torn has a new thread over on Twilighted and the best blinkie EVER. I'll put a link on my profile page. I want to know which team you're on, and why...and what I need to do to change your mind ;)
This chapter was lost forever, eaten up by my pc, until my amazing beta Siouxchef and her hubs walked me through recovering it. THANK YOU SO MUCH TRACIE. Also - thank you Jamie for your feedback!
I'll catch ya on the thread!
LUNA
