Hanzo Urushihara awoke to the smell of sweet, delicious, strawberry.
And fire. Mostly fire. Fire bad. Fire very bad.
Stirring at the smell of the smoke, Lucifer scrambled out of his box and looked for the source.
"Oh, good morning Lucifer!" Alciel greeted him with a smile. "I didn't expect you to be up so early! I was just finishing making breakfast!"
"Alciel? What are you doing? The kitchen is a mess! There's pancake batter everywhere, the stove is turned up way too high for pancakes, and-Oh. My. God." Lucifer's attention turned from the messy kitchen to Alciel's face. His eyes were sunken with bloodshot-red and his skin was flushed. "Did you go to sleep last night?"
"Well I tried, but I couldn't stop thinking about Lord Satan, so I decided to start cooking!"
"Holy crap Alciel, are you serious?!" Lucifer popped up. "Dude you need sleep. Right now."
"I'll try to sleep again after I'm done with these pancakes!" Alciel quickly flipped a pancake over, causing a splatter on the pan. "Whoops! How clumsy of me." Alciel's hands and arms kept shaking."
"Alciel, stop. I'll take care of breakfast. Just go lie down. Please." Lucifer took the pan and spatula from Alciel. Alciel tried to resist, but his exhausted body gave away to the lowly NEET.
"Are-Are you sure?" He asked.
"Yes." Lucifer said. "Get some Z's man. You've earned it. Give yourself a break.
"You know, you don't have to wear your hair like that anymore. You can go back to the way you liked it." Alciel took the hair tie off of Lucifer, and Lucifer's hair swooped back over his eye.
"Thanks, I think?" Lucifer responded. That was random.
"So is there anything else I can help you with? maybe I can-"
Oh no, not this. The give an inch, take a mile trick. "Just get some sleep Alciel! I know you're worried about Satan, but you are burning yourself out."
"I was hoping he would come in the middle of the night, but I guess not. But still, I just know he'll come back soon. I should really wait for him."
"I'll wait for him. It's not like I've got a job. Here, do you want something to eat?"
"No. I'm not hungry." Alciel looked around. "Here, let me just wash the dishes before I go to-"
"Go to sleep, Alciel! I've got it."
"Al-Al-Alright then. See you later."
Suzano came in. "Good morning. Has the Devil come home yet?" Seeing the kitchen, she took a step back and whipped out her hammer. "Where there a battle here?"
"There was no battle here, and no, Maou didn't come home. Alciel can prove it." Lucifer said bitterly. "He hasn't slept all night. I'm just sending him to bed."
"He should not be abusing his body like that." Suzano put away her hammer. A drop of pancake batter fell from the ceiling in front of her.
"I know, right?" Lucifer started cleaning up. "You know, he didn't waste all of it. A few good ones are in here. And he didn't really mess with the berries. Pancakes and fruit?" Lucifer offered. "I'm cleaning it up anyway. No use doing it on an empty stomach.
"Yes. Thank you."
They both quietly sat down at the table as to not disturb Alciel any more than he already was.
"So, why do you think King Satan has suddenly left?" Suzano asked.
"My guess? He planned something and forgot to tell anyone."
"You don't think he's in some trouble, do you? A surprise attack, perhaps?"
"If any angel was fighting him, we would have felt the power of a fight resonate. Besides, he's the Devil. You've seen him in action. He can take care of himself."
"True. However, from the way you all described his attachment to MgRonald's, doesn't it trouble you that he would give a two weeks notice to quit?"
"That's the only thing that bothers me. I don't see him quitting that job for anything good. My personal theory is that he got kidnapped by fast food ninjas, and brainwashed into quitting MgRonald's, and is currently being prepared for a much higher-up job by some other fast food titan."
"Honestly, that sounds like a good scenario, all things considered."
"I try to be optimistic."
"So, what are we going to do about Alciel?"
"I have no idea."
"Should we try to go out looking for King Satan today?"
"Looking for a demon in a haystack with Alciel? He would probably jump on anyone who looks like King Satan. And when we probably fail, it's only going to make him feel even worse."
"Still, I feel like we should get him out of Devil's Castle."
"Yeah. Maybe we can go grocery shopping? And after that do a little sight-seeing?"
"That sounds plausible."
"I'll go see how much money we have."
"Go call Emi too. I'm not sure if we're gonna be able to keep a lid on Alciel all by ourselves."
"Hey Ayshiya, they got milk on sale." Urushihara put the gallon of milk into the cart.
"That's nice." Alciel apathetically said as he slowly pushed the cart around.
"Here Alciel! More exotic ingredients that you can cook with! I know you've been meaning to expand your cooking talents." Emi dumped an armload of stuff into the basket.
"This isn't workin,." Suzano whispered to Urushihara and Emi.
"Ugh, you're right. I didn't want to do this, but I guess I have no choice." He looked up at the lights. "Dear Lord, forgive me, for I am about to sin."
Alciel looked down to see Urushihara tugging on his shirt. "Hey Ashiya, I know you're upset, but we can't get depressed now. We have to stay ready for when Sadao comes back! Do you really want him coming back to a run down and barren castle after being away?"
Ayshiya's eyes lit up. "By Jove, you're right! What have I been thinking? Now that Master's away, I should prepare for his return!"
Ashiya sped off down the aisle, almost running over patrons.
Urushihara walked back over to the girls, wearing a disgusted face. "I feel unclean after saying that. My mouth, my mouth is full bile."
"You did make him feel better." Emi said.
"But I hate to get his hopes up and things to go wrong later, like they always do."
"Frankly, I'm just trying to get through today. We'll work later out when later comes."
"Oh, Ashiya, is it? I didn't expect to see you here!"
"Is that Rika?" Emi gasped. "Oh no, please don't make a scene..."
"Well I'm just doing some Saturday shopping. I am the housekeeper, it is my job."
"Emi said that your friend Maou had gone missing. I'm sorry to hear that, are you okay?"
"I'm doing my best to push past it and keep to my house duties. I'm sure everything will work itself out in the end."
"Well I'm glad you're feeling okay."
"Thank you for your concern."
"I like it when I guy can stay on his duties no matter what comes his way. I think it shows that he's tough." She gave him a warm smile.
"Flirting. Code Red. Code Red. This is not a drill. I repeat this is not a drill." Urushihara said as he, Suzano, and Emi started running ahead.
"Hey Rika! We lost Ashiya for a second there. You should really learn to stop wandering away from us like that, buddy." Emi socked Ashiya in the arm.
"Well Ashiya, if you need to get out of the house, how about we go out tonight? I found coupons for half off one night of bowling. Maybe all of us can go? How about tonight at 7?"
Nope. Nope Nope. Not gonna happen. Emi stepped between them. "Gee, I'm not sure if Ashiya can make it. We kind of have stuff we need to do tonight."
"Maou being gone really has affected us the past few days. I think we should go." Suzano said.
"It would be a nice change of pace." Urushihara agreed. "Sure, why not?"
YOU KNOW DAMN WELL WHY NOT! Emi thought. "Ashiya, you know nothing about bowling. Are you really sure you want to do this?"
"Bowling is easy. We might not be experts, but its simple to knock some pins down." Rika pointed out.
"Oh, I suppose if it's alright with you guys." Ashiya said.
"We do have a 3-1 majority," Urushihara said. "Come on, let's have ourselves a good time."
"Alright Rika, I'll see you at 7."
"I'll swing by your place to pick you up around 6:30. Later."
"Wait! What should I wear?" Ashiya asked.
"Something casual. What you have on now is perfect!"
As Rika walked away to the register, Emi was ready to strangle three necks with two hands. Alciel had the biggest neck, he was going to require a whole hand. Hopefully she can choke out Suzano and Lucifer in the other. "Why on Earth would you even THINK about accepting a date?!"
"Emi, Ashiya needs to get out the house. We don't know when Maou is coming back. It's no use just waiting for him. We might as well do something." Suzano reasoned.
"Do you not know who your dealing with?!" Emi aggressively kept pointing at Ashiya. "Do you know who bowling is for? Normal, reasonable, sane people."
"That explains why you're single." Urushihara pointed out.
Emi grabbed a watermelon. "Why don't you shut up you piece of-"
"We are in public." Suzano hissed. "Behave for once."
"Oh this can go wrong in so many ways. I need an aspirin. Or two. Or three million." Emi was starting to panic.
"They're in aisle six." Urushihara pointed.
As soon as they had paid for their groceries, Emi took out a box of cereal and started beating Urushihara over the head.
"What did I say?!" Suzano ripped the box out her hand. "Come on Emi. This could be fun."
"Give me my box back!" Emi said. "We already paid for it! I'm just using it! As is my right!"
"Not in public!" Suzano said.
"Wait, she not allowed to hit me only when we're in public?" Urushihara said.
"Yes." Suzano replied.
"If this is your way of trying to get me to go out more, I will say I'm considering it," Urushihara muttered.
"Why don't we all just head home? We have bowling to prepare for." Suzano pushed them along forward.
"I still can't believe you two accepted Rika's offer. Why? Just why?"
Urushihara, Emi, Chino, and Suzano were sitting in a cafe. It was around midday.
"Listen Emi, we gotta do something about Alciel." Urushihara said. "I don't want him in the apartment all day."
"You mean you don't want to deal with him inside the apartment all day." She snapped back.
"I don't think we're gonna be able to do anything until Maou comes back," Emi said. "You're doing this for you. Not Ayshia."
"Of course. Paint me the bad guy. What's your point? What am I supposed to be giddy at taking care of my depressed friend? I don't want this, and I don't want to see him like this. So we take him out. Problem solved."
"But what if something happens? Can you think responsibly for once? What if Ashiya slips up and uses magic or something? It's dangerous to take him out when he's that bad of a state of mind."
"Well we gotta try something! Something! Anything! I just want him to feel better, even if it's only for a few minutes." Urushihara took a few gulps of coffee. "You're not around him 24/7. He is a mess. He didn't sleep at all last night. I woke up this morning and saw him covered in burnt pancakes and pancake batter. He was trying to cook breakfast and ruined the kitchen. I spent all morning cleaning it up! Do you know how many orifices pancake batter can worm its way into?" Urushihara downed the rest of his cup. "Ugh. I needed this. I'm gonna go get some more."
"Urushihara is right though," Suzano said while Urushihara was in line. "We need to help Alciel. Preferably sooner rather than later."
"The only thing that's going to make Alciel better is Maou. We have to wait until he comes back." If he comes back...
"There has to be something that can keep Alciel busy for a while." Chino said. "We just have to find it."
Emi groaned and put her hands on her head. "So now we're going to spend the night bowling. What the hell even is bowling anyhow?"
"It's a game where you roll a bowl down a lane and try to knock all the pins down," Chino explained. "There are ten pins. You have two tries to knock them all down. If you knock them all down in one try, it's a called a strike. If you knock the all down in two tries, it's called a spare. If you don't knock them all down in two tries, it's called an open lane. Also there are these lanes at the sides called gutters. You don't want to roll the ball into those."
"That doesn't sound difficult. We could try it." Suzano said.
"Oh, is that it?" Emi asked. "Bowling seems easy then. I get two tries for something I can do in one? This'll be a piece of cake!"
"So you've changed your mind on the bowling thing?" Urushihara said as he sat back down.
"Yep!" Emi beamed. "I'll knock them all down no sweat. Just keep Ashiya in line and follow my lead, and we'll get through this like normal people. Bowling, here we come!"
The group walked into Lucky Lanes Bowling Alley.
"Place looks kinda retro." Urushihara observed. "Not bad. I can dig it."
"Bowling used to be super popular in the 60s. Not so much anymore, but it's still a decent way to spend a night." Rika said.
"This seems simple enough." Emi aimed right down the center and rolled the ball down the lane, and it went zooming towards the pins. "There we go, there we go there we go..."
The balled rolled right into the gutter.
"WHAT?!" Emi screamed. "IT WAS GOING RIGHT DOWN THE LANE!"
"Don't worry about it. You get another shot." Urushiara said as the ball came back.
"That was just me getting used to it! I have it this time!" Snatching the ball up, Emi heaved it down the lane again.
Back into the gutter. 0.
"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" Emi reached for another ball.
"Emi, you already had your turn. You have to wait now!"
"I AM GOING TO KNOCK THOSE PINS DOWN IF ITS THE LAST THING I DO!"
"Emi. Public Place. Public Place." Suzano said.
"Ugh. Fine." Emi threw the ball down. Right on Urushihara's foot.
"OOOOOOOOOOOW MY FOOT! OH MY GOD THAT HURTS!" Urushihara, after screaming for about 2 minutes straight, grabbed his bowling ball off the rack. Hobbling on one foot, Urushihara rolled the ball down the lane, knocking down 7 pins.
"Lucky ass," Emi muttered.
"Come on Urushihara, pick up the spare!" Chino cheered on.
Hopping on one leg, Urushihara tried to aim it to knock down the last pins, but rolling the ball down took him off balance. Urushihara fell over as the ball rolled into the gutter.
"See? It's not as easy as it looks." Emi said.
"Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you..." Urushihara crawled back to his seat.
"Alright Alciel, your turn!"
Alciel, sliding away from a platter of untouched nachos, picked up the ball and rolled it down the lane.
Perfect strike.
"NO WAY!" Emi shouted. "HOW DID YOU DO THAT?"
"I just hit where the pins where." Alciel sighed.
"Well for starters, he had two usable feet," Urushihara said, trying to rub some feeling back into his toes.
"Alright, the rest of you, hurry up with your turns! I'm gonna knock all of those pins down! I swear it!"
Gutterball.
After Gutterball.
After Gutterball.
After. Gutterball.
Emi Yusa spent the next hour trying to roll a ball straight and failed each and every time.
She held her face in her hands and Ashiya made yet another strike. "Why? Why is this game so hard?"
"Emi! All we are doing is rolling ball down a lane! This isn't rocket science! I'm literally on one leg and I'm doing better than you!" Lucifer shouted.
Emi picked up her bowling ball. "This thing has to be broken. I just know it!"
"Sure. Blame the bowling ball."
Emi looked over every inch. A crack. A chipped off piece. Something had to be wrong. There was no way could be this bad.
"Emi. It's your turn again."
"Wait. What? Already?" Emi looked up at the score. Last Frame. EMI: 0.
There was no way she was going to walk out of here without getting a single point.
"Emi. Here, let me help you." Rika offered, walking with Emi to the front of the lane.
"Now, just slowly roll be the ball forward Emi."
Emi released the ball and it barely hit the lane with a thud. It rolled down the center of the lane. Slowly. Slowly. Slowly...
Emi's eyes grew wide. "It's gonna hit. It's gonna hit. It's gonna hit!"
The ball started veering off ever so slightly as it got closer to the targets.
"No. Nonononono. Please please please please please!"
"Don't panic! It's too close to miss!" Rika said. "You're gonna do it Emi!"
The ball connected with the pin.
"Finally!" Emi said triumphantly. "I told you guys I could-"
The ball bounced off of the pin into the gutter.
"WHAT?!" Emi shouted. "WHAT?!"
"Emi look! The pin is wobbling! If it falls over, you get a point!"
The pin kept rocking back and forth, teetering, tottering...
and came to rest. Upright.
"AH DAMNIT!" Emi shouted. "WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?!"
"Alright. Emi. This is your last chance." Emi said. "Let's walk away from this with something."
Emi's final bowling ball rolled back out. She stared at it, hesitant to even touch it. "What am I doing wrong?"
"I-I-I don't know at this point," Rika said. "Just try to... imagine the pins are something that makes you angry."
"Something that makes me angry? Screw it. Why not."
Emi closed her eyes. She imagined the pins were...
were...
Sadao Maou's stupid fucking face.
How dare he leave them like this?
How dare he made them feel this way?
How dare he always treat her like crap!?
"Fuck you, for everything you've done, you pathetic son of a BITCH!" Emi roared, releasing the ball. Anger gave way to absolute pleasure as all the pins fell before her.
"Finally! I knocked them all down." She said with a massive smile. "Did you guys see that?"
Everyone in the bowling alley gave her a look of pure shock.
"Wait, why is everyone looking at me like that?"
"You are supposed to roll the ball down the lane." Urushiahara grimaced. "You sent it rocketing through the air at Mach 100 you complete and utter psychopath."
"Oh, I did?" Emi turned back around. There were a few chunks of bowling ball pins left scattered on the lane. "Oops, used a little bit too much power there."
"Why are you like this?" Suzano asked.
"And here come security," Urushihara muttered. "Great. Just great."
Emi was still fuming in the car when the group came outside. Ashiya was carrying a trophy. "They gave me this prize when I performed a "perfect game."" Ashiya said.
"Congrats." Emi said sarcastically.
"Well, we're free to go back anytime and see if you can do it again Ashiya." Rika said.
"Weeeeeell, everyone except Emi." Urushihara pointed out.
"Say another word and I am going to smack you." Emi hissed at him as everyone got into the car.
"Other than Emi, you guys aren't half bad. All of you scored in the mid - 100 range."
"I actually had a great time!" Chino said. "Their nachos were great."
"I wanted to get you out a bit." She beamed. "And you were amazing. First time ever, you have a perfect game? Are you being honest with me? Perfect games only come with tons of practice."
Alciel used to take out whole formations of troops with a single blast of dark magic. But he probably shouldn't say that. "I guess I've just always had a good eye for accuracy." He shrugged.
"Well whatever the case, I had a great time." Rika said. "And I hope you did too." She reached into her purse. Getting out a paper and pen, she hastily scribbled something on it and gave it to Ashiya. It was her phone number. "Call me if you're ever feeling lonely again, okay?" She leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. "Take care of yourself Ashiya. You're a wonderful person. I'm sure everything will turn out okay in the end."
"T-T-Thank you Rika. I'm sure everything will." Ashiya said, blushing a little.
"See you next time." Rika rolled up the window and drove off into the night.
"So what happened, big guy? What'd she say?"
She just said that she would like to do this again sometime. She even gave me her phone number to call her."
"Wow, really! That's great Ashiya!" Chino said.
No. Nononononononononononono. No. Emi thought. That's gonna stop right now. It was bad enough that Rika had an interest in Alciel, but if they ended up becoming a couple... No. No. No. No. No.
Emi stood up. "I don't-"
Suzano grabbed her arm. "Let him have this one. We'll talk about it tomorrow."
"But-"
"Look how happy he is. He hasn't been like that since Satan left. Just let him enjoy this for the moment. Please." Lucifer said.
Emi looked at Alciel while he was talking to Chino. It was kind of a relief that he was in a better mood tonight.
"If anything happens because of this, I'm killing you both."
"Deal." Lucifer said before turning back to Alciel. "So Alciel, how'd you like tonight? Are you alright?"
"I was a little skeptical at first, but... yes. I do believe I enjoyed myself."
"And that's all that matters, man." Lucifer grinned. "All that matters."
